Boy Band (19 page)

When midnight finally does arrive, there’s a lot of cheering, hugging, and clinking of crystal glasses full of champagne.  The guys take a group picture and tweet it out to all their fans.  I want to enjoy myself, but by this point, I’m completely drained, both physically and emotionally.  All I want to do is go back to my own room and crawl into bed like the sad, pathetic blob that I am.  

Of course, when I do get into bed, I’ll have to wipe away all the Cheeto crumbs that Sam so graciously left on my pillow.  Seriously, how rude was that? He had the nerve to leave a mess on my bed even though h
e
doesn’
t
have feelings for me?  That might seem like odd logic, but when it comes to guys, nothing makes sense.  The male brain, I’m convinced, is the greatest mystery of life, the true final frontier.    

Before I leave, I give each of the guys a hug, saving Sam for last out of habit.  He holds me longer than the rest of his bandmates, long enough for me to breathe in his familiar scent.  For some reason, the smell brings tears to my eyes.  I almost feel like I’m saying goodbye to him, which is ridiculous because I’ll see him again in just a few hours.  It’s like saying goodbye to a dream that was never mine in the first place.  

Love is the worst.

CHAPTER 17

“
Heaven’s eyes are wide tonight

And I can see you

I can see you

This starship’s sailing across the sky

And I can see you

I can see you

Oh won’t you come with me

Across a never-ending sea..
.
”

Song: “Starship Sailing”

Artist: The Kind of September 

From the Album
:
17 Times Over

Today is going to be a long day. Not only because it’s the day of the bi
g
Meet Me on the Midwa
y
release celebration o
n
Good Morning Americ
a
and the guys have events scheduled literally from dawn until dusk, but because despite being totally exhausted last night, I barely slept.  That’s because my stupid mind wouldn’t shut up about Sam and Chloe.  I wonder if she’s texted him any more.  I wonder if he’s called her.  I wonder if they’ve made plans to see each other over the holidays.  We’ll be back in California in just a few days.  She’s probably waiting for him.  

Of all the gossip and all the rumors and all the speculations, why did this have to be the time they were actually right?  

Furthermore, someone (and by someone I mean Tara and Courtney) let it slip on a number of social media sites that Sam confirmed his relationship with Chloe.  So now, instead of focusing on the new album and favorite songs and their upcoming tour, fans and reporters all across the globe are obsessing over Sam and Chloe, or as the fans are calling them, Mornley.  Sam and Chloe’s first names don’t go all that well together, you see, so fans have resorted to combining their last names, Morneau and Conley.  Thus, Mornley.  

I have to admit though, some of the Twitter posts are pretty creative.

It’s official.  Sam is dating Chloe Conley. My heart hurts.  #Mourning4Mornley

Seriously?  Sam could have anyone.  ANYONE.  Why Chloe the CON-ley? 

Mornley sounds like something you’d name a troll. #SamAndChloe #CanThisNotBeAThing 

I wonder if Sam knew what he was getting himself into last night.  I want to check on him, to make sure he’s okay, but I know he and the rest of the guys are already in the dressing room, getting primped for the show.  They’ll be performing three songs off the new album this morning, followed by a reception, and then they’re off to a series of interviews.  

And then, just when it seems like it will never end, that’s it.  Today is our last day in New York for a while.  Good thing, too.  It has been snowing non-stop for the last few days, and the constant clouds are doing nothing for my bitter mood.  Thankfully tomorrow, we’re back on a plane to sunny Los Angeles, where the guys will at least have one day off before diving back into interviews and appearances on a few more talk shows.  Only after all that’s over will they finally get a real break before the tour kicks off after the beginning of the year.  And they need a break.  Not just from working, from everything.  From this whole world of fame and photographs and false rumors. And, as it turns out, true rumors.  They need some time to just be themselves.  

But for now, the stage awaits.  

⋯

I can’t tell you where I was or what I was doing the moment I realized that the guys had made it, like really made it.  I think at first, we were all too afraid to believe it.  Like, maybe it was all just a fluke.  Maybe what seemed to be a big deal at the time really wasn’t that big a deal in the grand scheme of things and in just a few weeks, it would all be over.  But their fanbase has only grown.  It’s extraordinary.  

Now, seeing the way they’ve filled up Times Square to watch their favorite band perform o
n
Good Morning Americ
a
absolutely takes my breath away.  

Watching the guys run out on stage to the wild screams and cheers of their adoring audience, I actually feel myself begin to tear up.  I’m so, so proud of them and I’m so caught up in the moment that I almost forget I’m supposed to be working.  

I have the telephoto lens today.  I’m supposed to be taking up-close pictures of the guys, as well as intimate shots of the stage and scenery.  I love my job.  It’s wonderful and I wouldn’t trade it for the world, but I also love watching them perform.  Sometimes, I wish I could just sit and enjoy the show like everyone else.  

All the guys look and sound amazing, and they are clearly having the time of their lives.  I try my hardest not to focus too much on Sam, knowing that if I do, I’ll probably make some kind of a scene, but it’s difficult.  He looks so good in his dark jeans and tan button-down shirt.  Curse him for looking so good and for being such an attractive person in general.  Especially when he dances around the stage and runs his fingers through his hair and does all of that other sexy musician stuff.  

It’s really quite irritating.   

However, his antics do provide a very welcome distraction from the frigid temperatures out here.  It’s freezing.  Thankfully, there isn’t any precipitation, but the skies are thick with gray clouds and the wind chill has got to be in the teens.  I’m telling you I cannot feel my ears, my nose, or my fingers.  

I may be fascinated by the idea of snow and the Aurora Borealis, but when it all comes down to it, my poor California body just isn’t cut out for this whole winter business. 

Still, the show is amazing, and the fans are nothing short of wildly enthusiastic.  I think it shows real dedication on their part, to brave the inclement weather to come out and happily support their favorite band.  I know the guys appreciate it.  They’re always so nervous that instances of extreme weather will discourage fans from coming out to see them, but that’s never been the case.  If there is anything that can be said about The Kind of September’s fans, it’s that they are loyal.  Loyal and incredibly supportive.  It’s like having a huge extended family.  They don’t only brave the crazy weather, they are happy to do so.  I think that really says a lot about the guys, to have fans who love them that much.    

After the show, we’re off to the reception.  The guys only have about thirty minutes to eat and mingle before their afternoon of, yes, more interviews and appearances, but at least I get a little bit of time with them.  I haven’t actually seen them all day.

“Hey,” I greet Sam with a huge hug, even though the little voice in the back of my mind keeps reminding me that it’s only temporary.  I’m just a placeholder for Chloe Conley.  And I’m really trying not to think about it.  Once he lets me go, I tell him, “You all were amazing.”  

“You think they liked it?”    

“They loved it.”  

His smile lights up his entire face, which, in spite of have just performed in the cold New York air, is flushed and damp with sweat.  His hair is windswept and messier than ever, but his big blue eyes are bright and lively, almost electric.  This is a moment that he and the guys have been waiting for for a long time.  He’s earned that smile.  

“Melissa!” Jesse comes up behind me and claps a hand on my shoulder.  He’s not much of a hugger.  “So, how were we?” 

“You were great.  As always.  But everyone thought you were ugly,” I reply.  Sam guffaws.  He doesn’t laugh.  He actually guffaws.  Jesse just glares at me.

“Why are you so mean to me, Melissa?” 

“Because she’s cute and she can get away with it.” Sam grins.  

If I’d heard that from anybody else under any other circumstances, I’d think they were flirting.  But I’m pretty sure Sam is just on an after-performance high right now.  He’d probably call Jabba the Hutt cute if he were to roll into the room with his creepy dead alien eyes and his nasty slug mouth.  

Of course, all the guys are really bi
g
Star War
s
fans so Sam might think he’s cute anyway.  You never know.  

Flirting and scary space worms aside, the reception is pretty fantastic.  Not to mention all of the food they’ve prepared, which, I’ve got to be honest, probably costs more than I make working for the number one band in the nation.  Granted, I’m really only compensated for my services with free food, free boarding, and complimentary trips around the world.  The point is the food is expensive.  

No sooner have Sam, Jesse, and I filled up our plates with coconut prawns, avocado wraps, and gourmet quiche than Joni approaches us, looking haggard. 

“Have any of you checked Twitter recently?” she asks.

“You know, I meant to, but I had this thing where I had to be up on stage and singing - ” 

“Shut up, Jesse,” Joni snaps.  “Ever since the news broke about Sam and Chloe, people have been flooding not only her, but her fans also, with all kinds of cyber abuse.  She’s even had death threats.”

“Are you kidding me?” I ask.

“Oh God, this is all my fault,” Sam mutters, rubbing his forehead. 

“It’s not your fault.  It’s Tara’s fault.  But unfortunately, it is your problem,” Joni tells him.  “Look, I know that fans can be passionate.  It’s not unusual for them to get jealous, even possessive.  The Internet makes that easy.  But we can’t have this.”

“No, I definitely agree,” Sam says.  “I’ll post something, try to put a stop to it.”  

“Good.  Thank you.”  

Once she’s gone, Sam sighs and says, “This was not supposed to happen.”

“Bro, like she said, it’s not your fault,” Jesse says.  “It’s what always happen.  It’s what’s always gonna happen.  Should it?  No way.  But you can’t control what other people say or do, especially online.  Don’t let it discourage you.  You deserve to be happy.”

“I guess,” Sam replies, before wandering off, staring intently at his phone.  

“Do you think he’s going to be okay?” I ask Jesse.

“Oh yeah.  He’ll be fine.  The real question is are you going to be okay?” 

“Me?  Why me?”

“If all this Sam and Chloe stuff turns out to be real.”  And then, with a cheeky wink, he walks away. 

⋯

Why did he say that?  Why would he say that?  Of course he had to mean that because Sam is my best friend and he gets a famous girlfriend then it’s going to be weird for me.  That has to be what he meant.  Any other alternative is unthinkable.  Because if Jesse knows, that means there’s a very good chance that Josh and Cory know too.  And if Jesse, Josh, Cory, and Oliver all know, then it’s almost absolutely certain that Sam knows.  That could be either a good or a bad thing. 

It’s a good thing because it means that even though he knows that I’m in love with him, he’s still willing to be my friend and not high-tailing it in the other direction or living in fear that I’ll give him cooties or something.  It’s a bad thing because it means he definitely doesn’t feel the same way, like even a little bit.  I mean, I know that last night, he kind of confirmed that he didn’t feel that way about me, but you know.  A girl still tries to hope.  

But by now, I think it’s safe to say my hope is wearing pretty thin.  If there’s any of it left at all.  

I need to stop obsessing over this.  Sam is not my life. So what if he knows that I like him, and so what if he’s actively ignoring this fact in order to keep things normal between us, an
d
so wha
t
if he’s in love with the beautiful, talented, and totally in his league Chloe Conley?  I have a lot of stuff going for me.  I still have a great job with the one of the best bands around.  I’ve traveled all over the world and I’m going to get to see even more of it in the coming year.  I might even pass my online classes.  I say might because it’s definitely up in the air, but it would be an accomplishment. 

So you see?  I don’t need Sam.  I don’t need any man.  I could be single for the rest of my life and be okay with it.  So there.  

Right now, the guys are giving what must be their sixth or seventh interview for the day.  I’m only sort of listening.  It’s nothing I haven’t heard before.  Tell us about the album.  Tell us about the tour.  Yeah, yeah, we get it.  They’re cool.  Whatever.  

I’m more interested in what’s going on with the fans and the media and The Great Chloe Revolution.  

Okay, so maybe I still care a little about what goes on with Sam.  

That message he wrote out to fans earlier is very vague.

@SamMorneauTKOS: Remember, not everything you read online is true. Please be respectful.

And that’s it.  I guess it’s really not all that surprising.  If there’s one thing Sam hates, it’s discussing his personal life on Twitter.  Actually he just hates discussing his personal life in general.  

Joni isn’t satiated.  She doesn’t think he’s trying hard enough.  But I think at least some of the fans got the message.

#TKOS Family, please stop harassing Chloe and her fans. Come on, we’re better than this.

I think we hurt Sam. Come on, he likes Chloe. He would never treat any of us this way. #HaveSomeRespect

I can’t believe the way people have been bullying Chloe. This isn’t us. #SupportSamAndChloe