Blurring the Line (30 page)

Wordlessly he leaned over and undid her bra. His large hand stroked her nipple until it hardened in his hand and then he squeezed, soft at first and then hard. The pain was searing, sending tendrils of molten heat through her. She wanted to cry out but she knew if she did he would stop. “Show me how angry I make you,” she said again.

He squeezed on her nipple again. This time her senses had been dulled enough not to register the full extent of the pain and all she felt was the rush of pleasure when he eased the pressure. He rubbed his hand over her ass. “Perfect,” he moaned as he rubbed her. His head lowered to the spot he had been rubbing. He kissed her gently.

He was holding back, she could feel it. She always felt it. She let go completely but Torres kept something of himself back. Not today. Beth turned her head so she could see him. “Make me feel how angry you are.”

Torres shook his head. “I’ll hurt you.”

A rush of desire coursed through her. “I know. Hurt me, Torres, I won’t break.”

He pushed her head down into the desk. His hands fisted in her hair. And then he leaned down again. “Do you want to know how much it hurt that you didn’t believe me?” he asked against the small of her back. His voice was hoarse as he fought to keep control.

She tried to swallow but her throat was too dry. If she wanted to turn back, now was the time. She wanted him to let go but that meant being prepared to take whatever he gave her. “Yes.”

His head lowered to her ass. He licked the soft curve of the cheek. Beth shivered at the sensation of his hot breath cooling on her skin. His teeth grazed her skin, soft, his tongue delicately marking her. She moaned softly. “Like that?” he asked and then he sank his teeth into her, biting her hard. Her head shot up at the shock of his incisors cutting into her flesh. He pushed her head down to the desk again. The pain brought tears to her eyes. He bit her lip to keep from crying out. She wanted to tell him to stop but she wanted more. She needed more.

“Still want to see how angry I am?” His voice was dark. There was warning in his words but she wouldn’t let her mind register it.

“Yes,” she said again. She couldn’t say more because her voice would betray her by cracking. She was scared but she wanted him to keep going.

His finger ran down the seam between her legs. He dipped his finger into her. Her body clenched around his finger. “So wet,” he murmured as he withdrew his finger and traced a path up her. Her eyes flew open when his finger reached its final destination. No one had ever touched her there. Her body tensed. He rubbed her slowly until her muscles relaxed. He circled her slowly, with each sweep of his finger he got closer to the centre. And then his hand was there at the tight entrance of her body. She took in a sharp breath of air when he entered her. It didn’t hurt but she felt uncomfortably full. She pulled away, trying to escape the pressure but he held her in place. Slowly his finger pushed deeper into her. “Still want to know,
Gatita
?” He was asking, but there wasn’t really a question to be answered. He was going to do whatever he wanted with her body. The thought sent another surge of wetness between her legs.

“Show me.”

Torres grunted as he thrust into her. He pushed into her so deeply her cervix ached. Her body tensed, which only intensified the stabbing pain. Beth brought her hand to her mouth and bit into her index finger hoping that her brain could only register the searing pain in one location. But her attempts were in vain. He thrust into her again, his finger still fucking her ass as he rode her hard against the desk. The pain didn’t stop, if anything it grew stronger. Her eyes watered, it was too much: she couldn’t take it.

But she wanted it.

It took all her power not to scream out. Torres would stop, or maybe he wouldn’t. She didn’t want to find out either way. She needed this.

Her mind was blank: no thoughts, no feelings, only sensations. Everything was heightened, the feel of the cool wood on her cheek, the burning between thighs.

Torres’ hand stroked her clit. She knew from before what a gentle lover he could be, the way his tongue stroked her and his mouth made love to her. But this wasn’t like that. This wasn’t sweet or tender this was hard and fast. Before he had coaxed an orgasm from her, this time he was ripping it from her.

Pain and pleasure collided in her, confused her senses, she didn’t know where one started and the other ended, but she didn’t care. She closed her eyes and allowed her body to be claimed, her reason to be overwhelmed. She didn’t need control; she needed him.

Bright colours flashed behind her closed lids. Her thighs shook, she couldn’t stop the involuntary action or the way her hips bucked against him. An exquisite pressure built inside her, pushed higher by every thrust. Her breaths came in pants.

Somehow she was present enough not to moan or cry out as her climax built. Every time she needed to thrash and call his name, she concentrated on focusing the energy down but that made it feel even better and made her need to scream even greater. It was a vicious cycle, like a holding pattern of pleasure, taking her higher and higher. It was torture: a sweet unyielding torture.

And then she couldn’t keep it in any longer, a moan tore through her as her body shook and contracted around him.

With a final thrust, Torres climaxed, hot against her inner walls.

Beth’s hands were slick, her face burned, her body ached but she was completely satisfied. She was only vaguely aware of her panties being pulled up or her skirt being brought down. She wasn’t ready to move.

Torres pulled her down on his lap. He kissed her forehead. “Next time I’ll be gentle,” he promised, and no doubt he would be. She smiled at the thought of another time. Her sweet Torres was back, reappearing as quickly as he disappeared. She loved her sweet Torres; he was the one she ran to when the chips were down. He was the one who knew how she took her coffee and left her notes. But the other Torres made her lose herself, he challenged her and pushed her and fucked her until she screamed.

Lucky for her, she had had them both.

“You never let me get to the important part,” Torres said.

She shook her head. “If you add one more thing to the list of reasons I annoy you, I will crush your larynx like a Dixie cup. Black belt, remember?” To prove her point she laid both of her hands on his clavicles ready to strike.

Torres chucked. “How did I end up with such a feisty
Gringa
?”

“Its Karma for shooting people in the face.”

“That’s my kind of Karma.” He leaned down and kissed her. “Do you want to know the most annoying thing about you, the thing I really hate, the thing that made me drive hundreds of miles both directions?”

“Nope.” Beth shook her head.

“I knew you would.” He kissed her again. She loved the feel of his coarse beard against her face. “Ask me.”

“No, I’m not going to ask you. I can live my whole life quite happily not knowing what else bothers you about me. Trust me, the not pretty was enough.”

He held her face in his hand. “Beautiful. Don’t forget that part. You’re the most beautiful woman I have ever met and I will break the legs of anyone who says differently.”

Beth smiled. She knew she wasn’t beautiful but she felt beautiful when she was with him. She felt it in the way he looked at her and how he touched her. There was no doubt she was beautiful to him.

“Fine,” she sighed in exasperation. “Tell me.”

“
Te amo, Gatita.
”
I love you.
Torres kissed her cheek again.

Beth pushed away from him. She shook her head. “No. You don’t need to say that.”

Torres shrugged his shoulders. “Suit yourself. But I do. You are a complete pain in the ass but I love you.”

“Really?” She couldn’t even let herself begin to hope it.

“Yes really. You’re a big pain in the ass. Huge.” Torres stretched out his arms to demonstrate his point.

Beth slapped his chest with the back of her hand. “You know what I’m talking about.”

He grabbed her hand and pressed a kiss to the back of her knuckles. “I love you. Let’s not mention it too much because it’s still kind of a sore point. It still pisses me off. Life would be so much simpler if I didn’t. But I love you, Beth, completely.”

“Really?” Beth asked again.

“Woman, which part aren’t you getting?”

She raised her shoulders. “The whole thing is too much to process. It’s been a hard day.” God it had been a hard day. And then a weird day. And then an incredibly erotic day. No wonder she was struggling…

“Take your time to figure it out. I’ll be here, just loving you and being annoyed about it.”

She shook her head. “What is there to be annoyed about? I love you, and I have for a while and I am not annoyed about it. I’m a little scared,” she admitted. “No, I’m a lot scared, but I’m not annoyed.”

Torres gathered her against his chest. His strong heartbeat tapped against her. “Let’s not fight it. You be scared and I will be annoyed, as long as we still have great sex, I can work with that.”

Beth sighed. “OK.” She tried to relax but doubt niggled at her. “What are you saying, Torres? Are we dating now like officially? I should tell Patterson; he is my partner and in his mind that means getting to know who I’m sleeping with. And—”

Torres cut her off with a searing kiss. “I love your lists. So neurotic, my crazy, messy, scared woman.”

“Yes, yes, we have established that I annoy you.”

“Again with you missing the important point. I love your crazy. I missed your crazy. It is the reason I turned back today.”

“And here I was thinking, it was because I am amazing in bed.”

Torres smiled. “Oh you are, but that would only bring me back temporarily. Your crazy is what is keeping me here.”

Beth’s stomach did a flip. Was he saying what she thought he was saying? “Are you staying in Texas?”

Torres nodded. “Or, I might try California. That is where my very neurotic woman comes from. I’m thinking we should try that for a while.”

Beth smiled her heart was so full it ached. “Really, Torres? You want to go to Sacramento? Don’t get your hopes up. It’s not a pretty place. It is flat and smoggy.”

“I don’t care. If that’s where you are, that is where I am going to be. I love you, Beth. But it’s more than that. I don’t want to live without you. I can’t. I’m happy when I’m with you. I didn’t even realise how angry and bitter I was until I met you and I remembered how to feel again. I need you.”

Hot pressure built between her eyes. “I love you, Torres.”

He laughed. “I hope you learn to call me by my first name before we have kids, because that would just be weird. For them, not me, I love your crazy.”

Beth’s nose scrunched at the thought. “You want kids?”

“Turns out I do. What about you?”

Beth shifted so she could face him properly. He already knew she was crazy so she may as well lay it all out there. “Yes and no. In theory I would love a baby or four, but reality is a different beast. I don’t want to do it on my own. Not that I couldn’t. My mom did it and she was amazing. But that’s not what I want. I don’t want my kids to miss having a dad. I don’t want some guy making promises to them and then leaving.” She stopped. She felt so close to Torres now and she didn’t want to ruin it by showing the depths of her crazy.

Torres nodded. “I see. You don’t know if you can ever trust anyone enough to have children. You don’t trust me.”

Beth tensed, that is exactly what she was saying. She wished she wasn’t, but that was exactly what she was saying. “I’m sorry.”

Torres kissed the top of her head. “Don’t be sorry. Trust is earned. I’m here for the long hall,
Gatita
. I hope that one day you can trust me enough to know I am not going to leave or screw up like your dad, but if you don’t, that’s OK too, I will just keep loving you and being slightly annoyed about it.”

“Only slightly?” she asked optimistically. She could work with slightly annoyed.

“Great sex really takes the edge off it, good thing you’re good in bed.”

Beth smiled. “And on desks apparently.”

“I look forward to discovering all the other places you’re good. How much time do we have until Patterson gets worried and breaks down the door?”

She sighed as he kissed her neck. “That reminds me. What time is it? I need to go pick up my family from the airport. Do you want to meet them?” she asked without thinking. Maybe it was too soon for a family meet and greet. Torres had only just decided that he wanted to be part of her life.

“Of course I want to meet your family.”

Beth smiled. She wanted her family to meet Torres and she wanted him to be able to get to know her mom before she was completely destroyed by Alzheimer’s. She pushed the thought away. There would be a time to be sad about her mom’s future later. Today she was just going to be happy and loved. “I have to warn you my mom isn’t great at night. That is when her symptoms get worse. I wish you could see her in the morning.”

“Beth, I am going to wake up by your side every day for the rest of my life. I am sure I will get the opportunity to see your mom when she is on top form.”

“Really?” she asked just to be sure.

“You’re really going to have to stop checking I really mean everything I say. We got a lot of years ahead of us and that will get old quick.”

Beth took a deep cleansing breath. “You’re right. OK, this is me dialling back the crazy.”

“Don’t dial it back too far. I love your crazy.”

Beth smiled. “That’s good. ’Cause I’m having a hard time keeping the crazy in.”

“Just let it out,” he laughed.

Chapter Twenty

“Mom!” Beth squealed and waved frantically when she spotted her family in the arrivals lounge. She balanced Alejandra on her hip. The baby waved her own set of plastic keys.

Paige ran towards them. “Oh my God, that is the cutest baby I have ever seen. Oh Beth, I love her. Ooh want one.”

Beth laughed. “I know, I love her too. She is the sweetest baby ever. She never stops smiling, even in her sleep.”

Her mom reached out and kissed Beth’s cheek. Her mom’s hair was cut shorter than it had been at Christmas. It now barely reached her shoulders, but she still looked beautiful and youthful. “You watch her sleeping, you know what this means don’t you? That is the universe calling to you. She wants you to have a baby. There is a spirit waiting for you.”