Blind Faith (11 page)

to visit the lady’s room and, while there, took several deep breaths, staring at herself in the mirror. On all

that was holy. She’d been raised in a manipulative, secretive situation, and she now worked in politics. If

her upbringing had taught her anything, it was how to survive the current situation.

All she had to do now was go home, get a decent night’s sleep, and her mind would clear.

Her shoulders back, she exited the ladies’ room—and ran right into Nate.

“Hey,” she muttered, bouncing back. His hands around her biceps kept her from knocking over a potted

plant. “What do you want now?”

He stood tall and ripped, a nearly animalistic tension cascading off him. His dark hair brushed his collar

in an untamed way, and something wild glimmered behind his brown-colored contacts. “We’re not finished

with our conversation from yesterday, so I thought I’d provide fair warning,” he said.

For the first time that evening, a hum fluttered through her belly. She’d spent an enjoyable evening with

a handsome, smart, sexy man… and had felt nothing. Now, one second in Nate’s arms, with him issuing

threats
, her body flared to life. “Let go of my arms, or I swear, you’ll never walk again,” she hissed.

He yanked her closer, one hand pressing against her lower back.

His erection jumped against her cleft, and she bit back a moan.

“I’ll meet you back at your place. If he’s there with you, I’m taking him out.” Nate released her and

pivoted to head back to his table.

Audrey swallowed several times, irritated beyond belief at the relief that filled her. Relief that Nate

wasn’t spending the night with Lilith the tigress.

* * *

Good. She’d get her bag and stay the night at a hotel before heading in to work the next day. She locked the

door.

A light flipped on.

Nate sat in a leather chair, his shoes kicked off, sock-covered feet on the ottoman. “ ’Bout time you got

home. I was about to come looking.”

It had taken several moments to convince Darian she wished to go home—alone—and then the cabbie

had taken the long route. “Don’t you have a blonde to flirt with?” Audrey asked, her heart kicking into gear.

“Jealous?” Nate asked, looking way too comfortable in faded jeans and a ripped T-shirt. A half-full

glass of red wine sat next to him on the sofa table.

Yes, actually. He wasn’t hers, but at one point, he had been. He’d been everything, and the thought of

him turning that all-encompassing focus on another woman hurt like a knife to the stomach. “Of course I’m

not jealous. Don’t be ridiculous.”

The image he presented, Nate waiting for her after a hard day’s work, had filled her dreams for much

too long. Home. He’d always been her idea of home, and an ache pounded in her solar plexus. They’d

never have that together, although sometimes, late at night when she couldn’t sleep, she daydreamed.

Fantasized. Wished. She cleared her throat against an impossible future. “When did you change your

clothes?”

The man looked even better in the casual wear than the perfectly cut suit.

“A few minutes ago in your room. I brought an overnight bag.” His feet dropped to the floor as he

gestured toward the couch. “Why don’t you have a seat, and we’ll talk?”

An overnight bag? The breath heated in her lungs, and she shoved down interest. “You’re not staying

the night.” Weariness weighed down her limbs. “I’m not up for another talk with you.” Man, she was tired.

He evoked so many emotions in her, her brain refused to think straight. “Don’t you have a war to go fight?”

“Come here, Audrey.” The low tone combined sexiness and command in a dangerously sensual way.

Her legs slid into motion before her mind reached a reason to refuse. She dropped onto the couch. “You

have twenty minutes to ask questions, and then you’re going to leave. Period.”

For answer, he reached for her foot and tugged off the heel. Strong fingers began to knead the arch of

her foot, and a small groan escaped her.

“Other foot,” he said. Determination hardened his face while his eyes softened.

Why did he want to bring her pleasure? Was it to manipulate her, or did he remember how much they’d

touched? So often and so freely.

God, she missed that.

So she lifted her other foot as if in a dream, and he plucked off the shoe. Both his hands went to work,

sending pure ecstasy up her legs. Her lids closed to half-mast, and she studied him through the remaining

light. “Why are you being nice to me?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” he asked, his thumb pressing beneath her heel, studying her face and probing deep.

The tendons in her foot relaxed. “Because you hate me.”

His head jerked. “I don’t hate you, Aud.” He ran his thumbs along her arches, melting her body in

pleasure. “I don’t understand you, and I’m not sure I ever knew you, but I could never hate you.” Regret

tinged his mater-of-fact tone.

“Why not?” she whispered, her body going lax.

He pushed beneath her toes, releasing pressure points as he exhaled slowly. “The only happiness I

remember in that hellhole included you. Those days, even if you were acting, those were the best of my

life.”

Remembered pleasure soothed her nerves. Her lids opened. “You’re a human lie detector.”

He shrugged, powerful shoulders moving. “Yes, but you got beneath all of my defenses. If anybody

could lie to me, it’d be you.”

A feminine contentment overcame her. She was the one woman in the world he’d let in. Too bad she’d

taken that trust and broken his heart—even if she did so for the right reasons. “I didn’t lie.” If nothing else,

she needed him to believe that—especially since it was way too late to turn back.

The gentleness in his touch contrasted nicely with the obvious strength in his fingers. “You knew we

started as an experiment?”

“Kind of. My mother asked me to help a lost soldier who needed some kindness in his life. She wanted

me to talk to you, get to know you, even become a friend. I said I’d help.” Audrey’s lips tickled into a

rueful smile. “I had no intention of falling in love with you like I did.”

“You don’t leave somebody you love,” Nathan said, dropping her feet, his gaze shuttering closed.

You do to protect them. But he wouldn’t understand that, would he? His entire life, all he had were his

brothers, and the idea of leaving them wouldn’t have occurred to him. They were all or nothing, the Gray

brothers. A familiar ache pounded in her chest. “I’m sorry I hurt you.” She lifted her legs to sit cross-legged

on the sofa.

“So why did you?”

She picked at a mar in the cushion. “We became too close, and the commander knew you wanted a life

outside of the military group. He said either I ended our relationship or you were going to die as an example

to the rest of his soldiers.”

Nate lifted his chin. “So you trusted him over me.”

Audrey started, and her breath caught. “No. I broke up with you to save you.”

“I figured out why you broke up with me. But again, you trusted the commander over me. I would’ve

figured out a way for us.” Determination and anger blazed hot in his eyes. “You had no right to make that

decision for both of us.”

She gasped, anger biting her. “This is about your ego? You beating the commander?” Ending her

relationship with him had nearly killed her, and he couldn’t see that? Standing, she kicked her heels out of

the way. “Forget you, Nate.”

He caught her elbow and tugged her back around, his movement making no sound. “My ego? No. This

is about you being too frightened to take a chance, to make a stand, and to fight for us, for what you said

you wanted.”

Oh, if he had any clue about her fight.

She shoved his chest. Hard.

The man didn’t move an inch.

“Let go of me,” she said, her chin rising.

“No.” Then his mouth captured hers. The gentleness always alive in Nate had fled, leaving heated,

pissed-off male.

Her knees weakened, and her breath heated. She opened her mouth to protest, to argue, but his tongue

swept inside, and she was lost. Lost to the passion instantly igniting between them.

Her nipples hardened to rock, while her nails curled into his chest, no longer pushing.

He drew her into him, taking control. His tongue explored her, tasting, claiming. Taking with a

desperation so hot it should’ve scared her. Should’ve provided warning that she was out of her element.

But fear remained so far in the background as to be inconsequential.

Or maybe she just wanted to feel alive. For the first time in five years, the pain of the present, the

fatality of the future—disappeared.

Only here and now existed—only pleasure so sharp it cut through her with a delicious blade of ecstasy.

One man on earth could provide such an overwhelming escape, and she wanted the freedom he offered. A

temporary relief from the reality of her life, of who she’d become and what she must do now.

So she jumped headfirst into the storm he’d unleashed, her tongue mating with his. A low growl

rumbled up from his chest like a lion about to attack.

He reached down and tugged her still-buttoned blouse over the top of her head. Cool air brushed her

skin, and her nipples sang a whispering
hello
. She protested when he jerked his mouth free and then sighed

when he nipped her jaw, tracing the fragile bone.

Fire lashed from his mouth, assaulting her with a need too dark to avoid. She held no illusions that this

wasn’t one night to scratch an itch. She’d given her heart to Nate years ago, but no future existed for them.

She had this moment, and she wanted to experience every second, no matter how quickly it ended.

Somehow her bra ended up across the room.

“Oh baby,” he murmured, his gaze hot and on her breasts. “These haunt my dreams.” His mouth found

her, licking along her breast and engulfing a nipple.

She sighed, her hands burrowing through his thick hair and seizing tight. Both knees weakened, and

only a strong arm banding around her waist held her upright.

Her wildest memories didn’t come close to the hunger replacing all thought. A smart girl would stop

him. She didn’t want to be smart, and she didn’t want careful. She wanted right now.

He switched to the other breast, laving and sucking, nipping with a hint of violence that shot liquid to

coat her thighs.

Finally, he lifted up, his unique eyes a color she’d never seen. Not gray or black, but something in

between. “Audrey?”

The low, guttural tone nearly propelled her right over the edge into orgasm.

She swallowed, trying to force out words. “One night, Nate. Just us. You, me, and now. No past, no

future.”

Regret twisted his lips, and desperation flamed across his face. He wanted to refuse, to maybe protect

them both.

The time for protecting them had disappeared five years ago. She felt an apology shine in her eyes as

she reached out and cupped his erection. Full and pulsing, even through the jeans, his cock overwhelmed

her palm in size and heat.

A furious struggle cut grooves into his rugged face.

She squeezed.

His eyelids shut, and when they reopened, the fight was over.

Chapter 8

Nate banded his hands around Audrey’s waist and lifted her, striding through the apartment and into her

bedroom, placing her on the bed. This was a mistake. No question, no excuses, he was about to make the

biggest mistake of his life.

He didn’t care. God, he
really
didn’t care.

Years of loneliness, years of uncertainty, all disappeared in the softness of her touch, in the gardenia

scent of her skin.

He was an experiment created in a test tube, maybe without a soul, perhaps without any hope. But for a

brief time, with this woman, he’d felt whole. Real. Good. Even if they just had the night, he wanted that

feeling again.

Before he sacrificed everything.

He tried to gentle himself as he pulled the skirt from her body. A groan escaped him at the bright pink

thong covering her mound. His Audrey had always loved bright colors.

Sliding his thumbs beneath the sides, he drew them down her curvy legs, his heart thumping at the

scars. The soft scent of woman hit him, roaring heat between his ears. “I’d forgotten how perfect you are.”

Denial lit her face. “Right.”

He shook his head, reaching down to drag his shirt over his head. The woman had always compared

herself to her cold, too-thin, unfeeling mother. She’d never understood that a guy liked curves. “I should’ve

shot your mother.”

Audrey’s head jerked. “What a thing to say.”

“Isobel has never treated you right.”

“My mother has her failings, I agree, but she tried. She sent me to the best boarding schools in the

world, and she always had a nurturing tutor or two for me when I was home.”

Nate’s eyebrows rose. “Probably to study how nurturing helped you to develop.”

She grinned, the smile tinged with sadness. “More than likely. I know you don’t like her, but she’s still