Authors: David Thurlo
“How soon do you have to leave?”
“Next week,” he said in a heavy
voice. “The Cow Springs Mission is about three hours drive from here. That’s a long ways, particularly for two people who work as hard as you and I do.” He paused, then added, “You mean everything to me, Ella, I don’t want to lose you.”
“We’ll find ways to see each other. Distance isn’t going to destroy our friendship.”
He stared at the ground, then looked back up at her. “Ella, my feelings
for you … pose a constant temptation to me. I serve the Lord, but I’m still a man. I’d like you to be able to come out and spend time with me as often as you can, and for me to be able to join you here.”
“I’d like that, too, but your parishioners aren’t going to understand,” she reminded gently. “The church board will throw a fit, then throw you out.”
“Not if we make it right.” He reached into
his pocket and brought out a small diamond ring. “Will you marry me?”
Maybe she should have seen it coming, but the sudden question took her completely by surprise. Ella stared at the delicate ring with the tiny diamond at its center.
“Ford, I—”
“Ella, I’ve loved you for a long time, almost from the moment we met, you know that. I would have preferred our relationship to continue growing at
its own pace, but circumstances are making their own demands.”
At a loss for words, she stared at the ring, wondering how to keep from hurting Ford. She wasn’t ready to say good-bye, but he’d put it on the line this time. Feeling trapped between wanting to protect him and the need for honesty, she took a shaky breath.
“I love being with you, Ford. Your friendship means more to me than I can
say. But our relationship can never lead to marriage. There’s just too much working against us.”
“I wouldn’t pressure either you or your daughter to join my church, if that’s what you’re thinking. That’s something that would have to come from you two, or not at all. More importantly, I can live with whatever choice you two make.”
“Live with, maybe, but you’d want more,” she said, shaking her
head. “You and I … weren’t meant to be. I care deeply for you, Ford, but I’m not in love with you.”
“Love in today’s world is often nothing more than a rush of hormones and the desire not to be alone. What we have is stronger. It just needs time to grow.”
“No. What I feel … isn’t enough.” Ella bit back tears. By hurting him, she was hurting herself.
He nodded slowly, then looked up at the stars
for a moment. “All right. I had to know.”
It was then that she realized his proposal had also been meant to clarify once and for all where they stood. He hadn’t wanted to leave and continue hoping for something that could never be.
“I really care about you, Ford, more than I’ll ever be able to put into words. If you’d allow it, I’d like to continue being your friend.”
“If friendship is all
we can have, then I accept your terms.” He placed the ring box back into his pocket, took her hand in his, then walked with her back to his pickup.
“Good night, Ella, and thank your mother for the wonderful tea.” He gave her hand a squeeze, climbed into his pickup, and drove away without another word.
Ella stood there a moment longer composing herself, then walked back into the house. Grabbing
a dishcloth, she joined her mother at the kitchen sink. While Rose washed, she dried and put away the dishes.
“I’m really tired, but I’m too wound up to go to bed,” Ella said. “After we finish this, is there anything else that needs to be done?”
Rose sighed softly. “He asked you to marry him, didn’t he?” Seeing Ella’s surprised look, she explained, “Earlier, while I was pouring the preacher
some tea, I caught a glimpse of him looking at a ring.”
“I said no.”
Rose handed Ella the last bowl to dry, then pulled off her rubber gloves. “You did the right thing, Daughter. Marriage to a preacher isn’t easy, particularly if you don’t share his religion. I lived through all that with your father. No matter what they say at the beginning, they never give up trying to get you to believe as
they do.”
Ella gave her mom a tired smile. “I know. Even if he never spoke of it again, it would be there in his eyes. I just couldn’t step into his world without giving up a lot of what I am, and that’s a sacrifice I’m not willing to make, at least not for this man—at this time in my life.”
“You and he … weren’t right for each other. But you still need a husband—the right one.”
Ella chuckled
softly. “Do you have someone in mind?”
Rose shook her head and stood. “I wish I did. I want you to be happy.”
“I
am
happy.” Seeing the searching look Rose gave her, Ella reached for her mother’s hand. “I like my life, Mom. I have everything I need and want right here.”
Rose smiled. “Your family and your job both need you. Your heart is full.”
Before she could give much thought to exactly what
her mother had meant, Rose ambled down the hall and disappeared from view.
* * *
The first thing Ella heard the following morning as she struggled to come awake was the guitar-heavy twang of girl angst country music coming from Dawn’s MP3 clock. Since being told she’d have to wait until Christmas for an iPod, Dawn had stopped using her headphones. Now she started each day with the external
speakers cranked up high—an obvious psychological ploy.
Groaning, Ella placed the pillow over her head, but soon felt someone poking at it. As she moved it aside, she saw Two, Rose’s scruffy brownish-gray mutt, looking at her.
She was scritching the old boy behind the ears when Rose appeared. “Good. You’re up! Make sure you ask your daughter about her last science quiz. Brace yourself. They
allowed her to retake it, so you may not want to know how she did the first time.”
Before she could wake up enough to formulate a response, Rose disappeared down the hallway. Ten minutes later, showered and presentable, Ella met her daughter, Rose, and Herman in the kitchen.
Seeing Rose busy cooking oatmeal, Ella sat at the table across from Dawn. “I understand you were allowed to retake your
science quiz.”
“We all did. Mr. Andrews said that almost everyone failed, so it must have been him and the quiz, not us. So we went over the material again, then retook it with new questions,” Dawn said, nodding. “I got a C-minus.”
Ella stared at Dawn. “So you must have bombed the first time?”
“Yeah, it was really hard. The second one wasn’t that easy either.”
“Earlier this year, you were
bringing down A’s and B’s. What the heck’s going on, Daughter?”
“
Nothing’s
going on. I just
hate
science! Half of the time it makes no sense to me.”
“If you’re having problems understanding, you need to spend more time studying and ask for help. Lately, you’ve been putting things off until the last minute. When you were given a second chance, why didn’t you pay attention and buckle down?”
“There’s lots of stuff going on, Mom. School’s out in a week, and Rita’s going to be gone all summer. I won’t see her for … well, months,” Dawn said, referring to her current best friend. “I needed to talk to her about—” She stopped speaking abruptly and stared at her hands. “Girl stuff.”
“Lately she spends most of her homework time on the telephone,” Rose said quietly.
“Can’t I
ever
get any
privacy around here?” Dawn protested.
“Do
not
take that attitude with your
shimasání
,” Ella snapped. “She wants what’s best for you.”
“What about what
I
want? Doesn’t that count anymore?” Dawn said, then jumped up and ran out of the room.
“I’m sorry about that, Mom. I’ll go talk to her right now,” Ella said, standing.
“There are many things on her mind. That’s why she’s been … distracted,”
Herman said.
Rose and Ella both looked at him. “What do you mean?” Ella asked him first.
He shook his head. “I shouldn’t have butted in. This is between you and her,” he said, then hurried out of the room.
Ella walked down the hall, and as she drew close to her daughter’s room, heard Dawn on the phone.
“They’re always telling me what to do. They treat me like a five-year-old!”
Ella stepped
into the doorway and signaled Dawn to hang up.
Dawn said a quick good-bye to the person on the other end, then sat on the edge of the bed and waited.
Ella let the silence stretch out and, as she did, saw her daughter become increasingly uncomfortable.
At long last Ella spoke. “I’m very disappointed in you, Daughter.”
“You never got a C-minus in your entire life?”
“It’s not the grade that
worries me, it’s the way you’re acting. You’re so involved with your friends and your gadgets that it looks like you’ve stopped caring about anyone but yourself. I know that’s not true, but you owe your
shimasání
and her husband an apology—and the sooner the better. After that, I’ll drive you to the bus stop. We can talk on the way.”
Dawn picked up her red windbreaker and matching book bag. “Mom,
if we don’t get going, I’m going to miss the bus.”
“Go apologize first.”
Dawn hurried into the kitchen, but the apology Ella overheard was brief and not very sincere. Realizing it would have to do for now, Ella met Dawn outside. Soon they were in the tribal SUV on the way down the gravel road that led to the bus stop.
“If you don’t bring your science grade up when you take your finals, your
cell phone privileges will be restricted into the summer. I’ll also limit your TV, Internet, and music hours. Those are perks, and they have to be earned, Daughter.”
“But no one else I know has to earn them. They’re just part of a normal life, Mom!”
“This is our family and our rules—
our
normal.”
Ella dropped her daughter off then drove on to the highway. As she headed north to the station,
she remembered her daughter’s halting first steps and her first night on a bed instead of a crib. Like a movie unfolding in the screen of her mind, each set of images filled her with longing for what would never be again.
The tone on her cell phone signaling an incoming text message brought her back to the present. Already at the station, she parked in her usual slot, and glanced down at the
screen.
YOUR DAUGHTER LOOKS GOOD IN RED
.
The pleasant warmth indulging in memories had brought her vanished in an instant, and her blood turned to ice.
THIRTEEN
As she rushed inside the station, cell phone in hand, Ella hit the speed-dial number that connected her to Dawn.
“Are you okay?” she asked as soon as Dawn answered.
“Yeah, Mom, I’m on the bus, halfway to school. You just saw me, what, fifteen minutes ago. What’s going on?”
“Are you still wearing the red windbreaker?” Ella saw Justine standing in the hall and motioned to her.
“Yeah.
Why?” Dawn asked.
“Did you notice anyone new parked around the bus stop? A car, truck, anything like that?”
Justine heard the question and gave Ella a curious look.
Ella signaled her partner to wait, holding up her hand, palm out.
“Um, no, just the regular crew,” Dawn answered. “What’s going on?”
“It may be nothing, sweetie, and I know that school will be out soon, but don’t go off by yourself,
and don’t take the bus home this afternoon. Either your grandmother, her husband, or your dad will pick you up. One last thing. Don’t let anyone you don’t know approach you.”
“You’re scaring me, Mom.”
“I don’t mean to, but I’m serious about this. Be smart. I’m working a special case and I need to know you’re okay. I’m going to call the principal and have him ask the other teachers to help keep
an eye out for any strangers hanging around the campus, okay?”
As Ella hung up, Justine jumped in immediately. “Is somebody threatening Dawn?”
Ella showed her the text message and gave her the highlights. “Get me that court order.”
“I’ll need some info that’s on your cell phone,” Justine said.
“Let me make a couple more calls first.”
Ella called Dawn’s school. After speaking to the principal,
she dialed Kevin’s number. He was in court, so all she got was his voice mail. Lastly, she called home and spoke to Herman, asking him to pass the news to Rose.
“I’ll handle it,” Herman said. “The principal is the son of a good friend of mine. I’ll make sure he has enough people available to watch the entire campus and the street in front of school.”
Ella knew how well connected Herman was.
Considering the manpower shortage at the station, she was glad to have him involved.
Ella closed up the phone, feeling more reassured, but it rang again before she could give it any more thought.
“Can you come by the morgue?” Carolyn asked. “I’ve got something that’ll make it worth the trip.”
“I’ll be there in ten,” Ella answered.
Carolyn started to say something else, but her other phone
line rang, and she said a hurried good-bye instead. These days Carolyn was trying to do it all, and the workload was staggering. Though she’d tried repeatedly to get some office help, it was nearly impossible to find someone on the Navajo Rez who was willing to work at the morgue. Those who did come left just as soon as they could find something else.
After apprising Justine and giving her the
cell phone information needed to request the warrant, Ella left, eager for action. Her nerves were taut and she needed something to do right now.
Once she arrived at the hospital, less than a five-minute drive, Ella headed directly to the basement. As she entered the outer office, she saw her friend eating.
Carolyn glanced up. “There’s more over there on the table. It’s one of my special coffee
cakes—very low in calories, but tastes great.”
Ella tore off a piece from the corner. “Hey, this is
good
.”
“Help yourself to more if you want,” she said.
Turning her head to look back at Carolyn, Ella’s gaze traveled over the body on the waist-high aluminum autopsy table just past the glass partition.