Black Bear Fall: A BWWM Paranormal Romance (Black Bear Saga Book 2) (21 page)

You were a titan among our clan, ready to destroy any pretenders to your title. You had respect, but most importantly others feared you. What changed in you that you were more interested in sitting around talking your way through issues affecting our tribe, instead of acting like the ruthless warrior you used to be. You went from fighter to politician in the space of a hundred years. I lost respect for you. I always want to be looked at with nothing more than fear by both my closest confidants and enemies. Respect is for old shifters whose time has come. Change is coming and I want to be remembered as the roaring bear at the head of the charge.

The feral continued to writhe in pain as it thrashed about on the floor. After a while its high pitched moans of agony became relaxing to Tulimak as he sat at his desk with his eyes closed and images of a new white bear empire danced behind his eyelids.

A
light breeze
swept through the centre of Twin Rock and Grace got up from the pagoda at the edge of town as she began to feel cold. She let out a dull moan as she stood up and held onto the wooden railing steadying herself. I feel like I’m a hundred years old, she thought as she stretched out the tightness in her muscles. The worst of the biles symptoms were still working its way out of her body and everywhere felt achy and her brain felt like it was wrapped in steel wool.

The last two days had gone in an emotional haze of missing Tom and sorrow at the loss of her friend. Is it wrong that I felt relief for not having to face Annes husband and children. Early yesterday morning she had heard a knock at the door across the hall and Grace had pressed her ear against her door to hear what was going on in the hallway outside. It was Elder Silas and judging by the pained sounds, he had informed Annes husband about his loss. Grace had felt a hollowness inside like the plaintive whistle of a breeze through a copse. She wanted to go out and offer the man some kind of solace but was frozen to the spot and unable to do the right thing. She heard Elder Silas tell the man, “It’s best if you and your family come with me know,” and within a couple of minutes she had heard them all leave together. They crossed the road in front of Graces apartment and climbed into a pickup truck being driven by a man with a thick bushy beard. Elder Silas gave the driver a nod and they drove out of town in the direction of the mountains and the wilderness beyond.

No one called to check on her so for the last couple of days Grace had spent the time walking up and down main street and sitting at the pagoda at the edge of town and thinking. She had seen no one she knew during this time and Elder Franklin and Elder Silas were no where to be seen. Self pity was not a trait Grace thought she had back in the real world, in the time before she knew about shifters, mongrels and what other supernatural creatures existed that she just wasn’t aware of yet. Now she was feeling nothing but doubt and pity for herself.

I don’t think I have ever felt more alone, Grace thought as she headed back towards town. I am completely cut off from anyone I know and no one will give me any answers about what is going on. I am sick and tired of being told I am someone special, some sort of chosen one and yet no one will give me a straight answer. What would the Elders do if I turned around and walked out of town swearing never to look back or help them with the coming war. The thought of leaving the town behind and running away from everything appealed to her. I can’t be the woman from their prophecy Grace thought feeling herself get angry. If I was truly the chosen one I wouldn’t even consider turning my back and leaving the shifter world behind.

Grace looked up and he was standing in the middle of the street looking at her. Tom was back and Graces heart began to beat wildly in her chest as she ran towards him. Tom began to run towards her as he smiled broadly. All thoughts of leaving faded as she began to run. The aches in her joints eased with each stride that brought her closer to him. Grace could feel a smile spread across her face as she got closer to the man she loved.

Tom swept her up into his arms and then pulled her close to him. Graces body tingled as he held her in his tight embrace. Their lips met and all doubt, pain and worry disappeared as fireworks exploded behind Graces closed eyes.

“I thought I’d never see you again,” Grace said pulling away.

Toms eyes danced over her face, his smile wide as he looked at her.

“Nothing could have kept me from seeing you again,” Tom said.

Everything around them faded away, the cold wind, the sound of birds singing from the eaves of the diner, as they kissed again. Tom kissed Grace on her neck and said in a serious tone, “How are you holding up? the Elders told me about what happened.”

Grace stepped back from him and wrapped her arms around herself and said, “I’m still in shock, trying to process what happened. I can’t believe Anne is gone and,” she didn’t finish. Grace fell to her knees and threw her head back and let out a bellow of pain. The town around her rippled and warped and the colours began to desaturate. Everything went to black and then out of the darkness a new reality popped into focus. Grace could feel rough wooden boards under her hands and knees. She looked around and people were huddled in groups around burning lamps belching thick black smoke. Everyones eyes were downcast, no one looked at each other. The walls of the room were wood and covered in a wet slick of condensation. The room tilted and a wooden barrel in the corner moved and water sloshed over the side drenching a young boy pressed close to it. I’m on a boat, Grace thought to herself.

She tried to look around and it felt like her body was bound in steel. Her view flickered and she was leaning in close to a womans ear and saying, “I’m hungry, I can’t hold on much longer.” The woman turned to her, hollow blue eyes surrounded by pale skin and said, “Hold on just a little longer Anne. We are nearly home.”

The room lurched and Grace felt cold water splash around her ankles. People began to shout. Men pushing weak and frail women out of the way as they moved towards the front. Babies cried in painful wails. A powerful stench of rotted vegetables and human waste filled Graces nose. Her eyes watered as she looked around at the people pushing towards the set of wooden steps leading out of the hold. The walls began to twist and distort around Grace and then her ears were filled with the noise of crackling static.

She was on her hands and knees breathing hard, tears streaming out of her eyes. “What happened,” she asked through gasps of air. “I was on a boat. I think it was a flashback to Annes past.”

Tom helped her up and dusted off the dirt from her knees and hands. “It’s the bile. The Elders told me about what happened. If you are still getting flashbacks to Annes past,” Tom said and stopped abruptly.

“Tell me, whats going on,” Grace demanded as she wiped her eyes.

Tom asked, “Are you ok?” and put his hand on her shoulder.

Grace shrugged it off and said, “Tell me Tom. Please don’t treat me like the Elders and leave me in the dark.”

Tom looked at her and said, “I need the Elders to confirm it fully, but I think if you are still seeing visions of Annes past then you are still linked to her.”

Grace looked at him and bit her lip, not wanting to say out loud what she hoped he was saying.

“This could mean Anne’s still alive,” Tom said and hugged her tight against him.

“How do you know this?” Grace asked.

“When someone ingests a shifters bile they become linked to that shifter forever. It unlocks a doorway between the two people allowing the recipient to experience sequences from the shifters past. The only way to break the bond is through death. If you are still having visions it means Anne is still alive,” Tom said smiling broadly.

Grace looked at him with her mouth agape and then said, “We have to go back and rescue her from that hell hole. We need to go back now before Tulimak tortures her any more. Round up your team of men and get...”

“Grace,” Tom said interrupting her, “we can’t go rushing back there, what if this whole thing is a trap? We need to talk to the Elders to see what our best course of action is.”

Grace looked at Tom in disbelief and said, “We can’t wait around, Tulimak is a mad man. We have to rescue her.” Her voice began to quiver and Grace collapsed into Toms strong arms and sobbed against his chest. The events of the past week came flowing out of her in hot tears rolling down her cheeks. I can’t sit around and do nothing, she thought, as Tom ran his hands down her back to soothe her. I need to go back and rescue my friend. She let the tears flow knowing that she was utterly helpless to do anything for her trapped friend and ultimately the decision would fall to the Elders on what to do.

When she finished crying Grace felt more exhausted then ever before and the pains in her body from the bile had returned in force.

They walked in silence towards the hardware store and on the front step Grace turned to Tom and said, “What happens if the Elders forbid a rescue attempt?”

Tom looked at her with a determined look and said, “If that happens, I go anyway, with or without the Elders permission.”

They both entered the hardware store and headed to the back area for a meeting with the two Elders.

E
lder Franklin slammed
his fist onto the table and said, “It’s out of the question Tom. We need you here.”

Tom looked to Elder Silas in the hopes of another opinion. Elder Silas would not meet his eyes when he said, “Franklin is right. It would be too much of a risk to send you and a team into Tulimak's compound. Chances are he would be waiting with open arms for who ever we send his way. We are entering dangerous times now and Tulimak will look for any pretence to start an all out war with our clan.”

“He already fired the starting shot when he tortured Grace and Anne. What more do you want him to do,” Tom said addressing Elder Franklin.

“Tom you are a damn fine tracker, probably the best this clan has ever known,” Elder Franklin said as he took his pipe out of his breast pocket. “You know as well as anyone in the clan that the peace we have enjoyed between the clans for the last hundred years is a precarious and fragile thing.”

Tom raised his voice and said, “Look Elder Franklin I’m not ready to sit here and listen to you tell me another one of your history lessons. One of our own is trapped behind enemy lines. The time for discussion is over, we need to get Anne back as soon as possible. You know it’s the right thing to do.”

“Please Elder Franklin.” Grace said, “I couldn’t have escaped without Annes help. It’s the least we can do, we must go back and get her.”

Elder Franklins face betrayed no emotion as he looked at Tom and then Grace and then said, “You have your orders Tom. At this time the rescue of Anne is not a priority. There is nothing more I can do.”

Tom stood up and slammed his fists on the table. Veins stuck out in his neck as his face reddened. “This is bullshit Franklin and you know it. You’ve risked more for less important targets in the past.”

“Calm down Tom,” Elder Silas said in a low voice.

“Do you go along with this?” Tom said turning on Elder Silas.

Elder Silas nodded his head slowly and said, “I do. It’s our best course of action until we can figure out what Tulimak is up to.”

“I’m going after her,” Tom said jabbing his finger towards Elder Franklin.

Graces heart was thumping in her chest and she felt an uneasy air of aggression in the room. Tom looks like he is about to jump over the table and pummel Elder Franklin she thought as she reached up and stroked Toms arm.

“You will do no such thing,” Elder Franklin said lighting his pipe in a slow practised movement. He took two loud puffs on the stem and said, “Your orders are to stand down. We can’t have you storming Tulimak's compound all to save one shifter.”

“When did you change Franklin,” Tom said nearly spitting the words out. “You used to have heart and compassion, now you are nothing more than a bitter old man.”

Elder Franklin observed Tom with calm eyes and said, “Steady now Tom, you have no right to lecture anyone on compassion. Was it compassion that made you abandon your wife and child back in Ireland?”

Grace looked at Tom, her eyes widening. She felt a hollow ache in her stomach as she thought, Toms married. How could I have been so stupid.

Tom pulled away from Grace and dove across the table at Elder Franklin. His pipe went skittering across the table flinging loose tobacco and burning embers. Tom grabbed Franklin by the collar and hoisted him out of his chair.

“Stop Tom, please,” Grace pleaded to him trying to pull him off Elder Franklin.

“You know why I left her behind and she knows as well,” Tom shouted into Franklins face. His arm was pulled back and his fist balled ready to punch him.“

Franklin looked at Toms fist like a man facing down the barrel of a gun, any second now it was going to go off. “That’s not what she told me today,” Franklin said as a sly smile curled the corner of his lips.

Tom snapped. Grace didn't see the punch. Franklin fell backwards out of his chair with a crash and a stack of invoices on the shelf behind him spilled onto the floor. Tom scrambled over the table after Franklin.

He looks like he wants to kill him Grace thought as she sunk back in her chair in horror. Her new life was unravelling around her. Tom had lied to her. He was married. I can’t take much more of this Grace thought as Tom crossed the table and grabbed Elder Franklin by the lapels and dragged him up from the floor. A thin line of blood ran from the corner of Franklins mouth.

“What are you going to do? Hit me again?” Elder Franklin said.

“I should kill you. I’m nothing but a blunt instrument you use for what ever plans you and Elder Silas have cooked up,” Tom said jabbing his finger in the mans chest.

“Enough,” Elder Silas said standing up.

“You could have used anybody for that train mission and you chose me,” Tom shouted as his face reddened.

“Past history doesn’t matter. You’re the best we have Tom. We needed you, and only you to complete it,” Elder Franklin said.

He’s not afraid Grace thought as she looked at Franklin and expected to see the face of a scared old man. If anything he seems to be putting up with Toms outburst. Is he more powerful than Tom, Grace wondered as she stared at the men.

“I’m sick of all the secrecy,” Tom said as his hands fell down by his sides. Grace could see the fight was leaving him and being replaced by exhausted resignation. “I have to be let in on more about what’s going on. Why did you have me rescue Oishin?” Tom said looking back and forth between the two Elders.

Is that his wife's name, Grace thought as it felt like someone was squeezing her heart.

Elder Silas got up from his chair and walked around to the two men. He put his hand on Toms shoulder and said, “Tom you know as well as anyone that we can’t reveal the inner workings of the clan. You remember the great schism and what happened after that. We cant have a repeat of that event. The clan wouldn’t survive it.”

Tom looked at Elder Silas as if he was only realising there were other people in the room for the first time. “I can’t do this anymore. Seeing Oishin again its brought everything back.”

Elder Franklin walked past Tom and picked up his pipe from the table. He glanced at Grace and then turned back to Tom as he started to refill his pipe. He thinks this is all my fault Grace thought. That man has had a problem with me since I first stepped foot in this town.

The three men began to talk to each other in whispered voices and Grace could only hear snatches of the conversation. As the two Elders spoke Tom seemed to begin to calm down. The calmer he got the more annoyed Grace could feel herself getting. Her chair scratched noisily on the floor as she stood up.

“When where you going to tell me you were married,” Grace said as she could feel her anger swell.

“It’s not what you think,” Elder Franklin said glancing back over his shoulder to look at her.

And yet you chose to let it slip, Grace thought as she stared back at elder Franklin feeling total hate for him.

Tom turned around and looked at Grace and then diverted his eyes from hers. Elder Silas patted him on the back and said, “It’s all for the best.”

“Answer me Tom,” Grace said, “don’t I deserve that much at least. You pulled me into your world and now I find out you’re married with a child.”

“We can talk about it back in your place,” Tom said as his shoulders slumped and every trace of the angry animated shifter he was mere minutes ago was now gone.

“What did you say to him?” Grace said to Elder Franklin.

I can be plenty mad for both of us, Grace thought as she glared at the two Elders. I am sick and tired of these two scheming behind the scenes.

“We spoke the truth to Tom. Informed him about the bigger picture and what is at stake,” Elder Silas said returning to his seat. He sat down and scratched the loose stubbly skin under his chin.

“It is a heavy burden for any shifter to take on board,” Elder Franklin said as he checked his pockets for his leather tobacco pouch.

Grace looked at Tom, he’s so pale she thought as he ran his hand over his face and still didn’t look in her direction.

“Tom are you ok?” Grace said hearing the shake in her voice.

“I’ll be ok,” he said looking over at Grace with wide eyes as if he had forgotten she was in the room.

I feel like the walls are pressing in on me Grace thought as she reached a hand out to Tom.

“Let’s go,” Grace said and he took her hand, his palm clammy and cold.

Tom nodded his head slowly and glanced back at the two Elders who watched him with expressions that gave nothing away. They left the store without looking back. Once outside and crossing the street to her apartment Grace squeezed Toms hand and said, “What’s going on? What did the Elders tell you that has you so spooked.”

Tom looked at her as colour started to come back into his cheeks and said, “They told me a name. A name of someone I never thought would be spoken out loud again.” He let go of Graces hand when they got to the door to the staircase leading up to her small apartment. “I don’t think I should come in.”

They really did a number on him Grace thought as her hatred of Elder Franklin increased.

“Come up for some coffee. Shifters do drink coffee:” Grace said cracking a weak smile.

Tom ran his hand through his hair and said, “We do. I’d be happy to join you for a cup.” His hand shook as he let it drop to his side.

Grace busied herself preparing the coffee and observed Tom as he looked out the front window at the view across to the hardware store and then took a seat. He looked over at Grace and gave her a nervous smile.

Don't push it, let him open up to you Grace though as she smiled back. She had a thousand questions spinning around in her brain and it was taking all her will power not to bombard him with questions.

Grace brought over two cups of steaming coffee and put one down in front of Tom. “Sorry it’s only instant,” she said with a shrug, “the jar looked ancient, hopefully it doesn’t kill us.”

Inappropriate Grace thought as she cringed inwardly.

Tom took a sip of his coffee and said, “It’s good.” He put it down and looked directly at Grace. “It’s true I’m married or at least I was at some time. Human time frames and laws don’t apply in these kind of situations.”

Grace felt a ball of anguish in her chest when she heard the words married. I knew he was too good to be true she thought while trying to keep any emotion off her face.

“I was married to a woman a long time ago and for decades I thought she had carried my child,” Tom continued.

The ball of anguish felt like a punch to Graces chest. I never wanted to be the kind of woman who stole a man from another woman, she thought, as she felt her throat tighten as she waited for Tom to let her down as gently as he could.

“Where is she now?” Grace heard herself say, feeling disconnected from her body as if she was watching something unfold before her that she had no power over.

“She’s out of town, out in the wilderness somewhere. The Elders are the only ones who know her location,” Tom said.

“When will you be joining her?” Grace said in as level a voice as she could muster.

Tom looked at her with a look of confusion and then said, “I won’t be joining her. I’m with you Grace,” he reached over the table to take her hand and she didn’t reciprocate. Tom pulled his hand back and looked at the pattern of pale white scars across the back of his hand. “I better start from the beginning or as much as I know.”

Grace nodded her head and sat back to listen.

“The last mission the Elders sent me on was to retrieve a shifter from a cargo train. They told me that they didn’t know who it was and all they knew was that it was a member of our clan and someone important. The whole thing was a simple snatch and grab. The train was pulling mostly cargo carraiges and had next to no security. What the elders failed to tell me or more likely chose not to, was that my target was someone that I knew. It was someone from my past,” Tom said and paused to drink some coffee. “It was my wife, although now with the time that has passed she would be my ex-wife.”

“How long since you’ve last seen her,” Grace asked.

If its any time in the last few months I’m walking Grace thought, I’m not getting in the way of them being together even if it breaks my heart.

Tom shook his head in disbelief and said, “It’s been close to a hundred and thirty years since I was with her. She disappeared back then and I searched for her for a long time, it must of been a decade before I gave up.”

Grace stiffened in her seat and thought he still loves her, his will be a love for the ages. How am I ever going to compete with that?

Tom reached across the table and took Graces hand and said, “There is nothing between us anymore. I want to be with you, build a future for both of us, Oishin means nothing to me.

What kind of name is that Grace thought as she let Tom take her hand and stroke the back of it with his thumb.

“Tell me what happened between you,” Grace said in a calm and steady voice.

“The last time I saw her was in Ireland at the end of the eighteen hundreds. We had fled several countries in Europe trying to find somewhere peaceful to settle down. Back then superstition was rampant and when people started to sense that someone lived among them that was different, well you could see how that would go. We had been living in rural Ireland for a few months when I got a lead on a small group of shifters who were living in London. We had been searching for some of our own for a long time and this was the first piece of information that looked like it might go somewhere. I set off to try to find them. I was going to be gone two or three weeks. When I got to London I got into a bit of trouble and ended up not making it back to Ireland for nearly a year. When I returned home she was gone. Our house was burnt to the ground and the land around it salted and poisoned. The next few weeks were a blur as I searched the countryside for any kind of piece of information on her. I couldn't let myself think she had been captured and killed. I was balancing on the edge of despair and contemplated going into longterm hibernation so I wouldn't have to feel the pain anymore,” Tom said.

Grace looked at Tom, the squareness of his jaw, the soulfulness of his eye, the way he would rub his hand over the stubble on his chin as he talked about something emotional. I know so little about you, Grace thought as she held her coffee cup between her two hands. How much life has he lead before he met me she wondered. Can we really make this thing work with the gulf of time between both of us.