BIG: (A Bad Boy Stepbrother Romance) (7 page)

“And you did.”

“I was just looking out for you.”

“Like a good big brother.” She poked him again, lower this time, truly shocked at how rock-hard his belly was. She was still getting used to this leaner, harder man. “I know, Ric. I know. I remember. I was there.”

“I don’t think you remember it like I do.”

“So tell me.” She turned an invisible key in her lips. “I’ll shut up.”

“You asked me to pick you up.” He looked at her, waiting for her to interrupt, but she just nodded. “I didn’t know all your friends would be there. I found you in the stands. You were sitting next to him—but you got up and hugged me.”

She’d truly been happy to see him, especially after Ryan’s hissy fit about the seating arrangements. She was glad she’d asked her stepbrother to come get her, instead of going with Ryan to a party way out at one of his friend’s afterwards.

“Everyone had to move over to make room for me.” Ric’s cheeks actually got a little pink at the memory. “Your girlfriends were talking and giggling.”

“They were teenage girls.” She shut up when he gave her a cool look.

“I heard one of them make some comment about my fat ass, Leesa. Trust me, I know when people are making fun of me.”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, not sure if she was apologizing for then, or now.

“Anyway, Ryan said hi to me, but he was being an asshole to you,” he went on. “He kept complaining about the seats. And the fact that the coach had the nerve to bench him for that mascot stunt.”

She rolled her eyes at that. Ryan and a few of his buddies from the football team had spray-painted their rival school’s mascot head—a giant beaver of all things—bright pink. The coach had banned them from the next three games because of it.

“I just ignored your friends making fun of me. I was used to it by then.” Ric shrugged, arms crossed again as he looked off at the distant target. “But Ryan just kept going on and on—I couldn’t stand the way he talked to you, Leesa.”

She didn’t say anything. Ryan’s comments were burned into her memory too. It was probably a good thing Ric hadn’t been there when the phrase “dumb cunt” came out of Ryan’s mouth.

“Then the crowd went nuts—remember? The substitute quarterback scored the winning touchdown and suddenly Ryan was pissed—I saw his face. But you were too busy cheering for the home team to notice.”

“Right?” She snorted, shaking her head. “God forbid. He took it so personally. Like I was booing for him or something.”

“Then you tried to smooth it over.”

“What else could I do?” She shrugged. “A win was a good thing, right? I mean, for the team. I don’t know why he couldn’t see that.”

“You weren’t cheering for
him.
That’s what he wanted. That’s all he ever wanted.” Ric sighed. “That’s when he grabbed you and pulled you out of the stands.”

She nodded, lips pressed into a thin line at the memory. It was crystal clear to her, even now.

“Your friends just sat there, like it was nothing. Like he did that kind of thing all the time or something.”

He did.

But she wasn’t going to tell Ric that. That’s when she’d nearly gone head over heels down the stadium stairs and could have broken her neck. She remembered Ryan’s fingers digging hard into her upper arm. Remembered his sneer as he manhandled her down to the bottom.

“So I followed you.” He was lost in the memory too, reliving it. “I’d never seen you cry like that before, Leesa. Maybe that’s what did it. I couldn’t... I couldn’t stand to see you hurt.”

She’d been fine, physically, aside from the finger-shaped bruises that she’d find later on her upper arm. But Ryan had practically exploded with anger once they reached the bottom of the stadium steps. He’d pulled her out of the way and screamed at her, taking out all his frustration and rage on her, and she’d done nothing. She had just stood there, shaking, crying, and had taken it, every word, like raining blows down on her head.

Part of her had been aware of Ric’s presence—she could only see through prisms by that point—but she hadn’t acknowledged it. The toxic words spewing from Ryan’s mouth had blocked everything else out.

“I remember him calling you a dumb bitch,” Ric said in a low voice.

Better than a dumb cunt,
she thought, but didn’t say.

“He had your arm and he was shaking you and yelling and you were crying, asking him to stop, to let you go...”

She nodded, swallowing past a lump in her throat. She told herself she wasn’t going to cry. It was a long time ago. She’d been a different person then. And Ryan meant nothing to her, not anymore.

“And I hope to God you didn’t believe him—about Ryker money being the only reason you got into Kent Hill.” Ric glowered. “And all that crap about you being some sort of ice queen, not putting out? Fuck him. And good for you.”

But she had believed him—at least, part of her had. All of it—her admittance to Kent Hill being due to her stepfather’s money, her reputation as a frigid, English bitch. After all, that was the reputation she was looking to shatter, dating Ryan in the first place, wasn’t it?

“You were crying and he wouldn’t let you go and all
I
did was pull that little weasel’s hands off of you.” A muscle in Ric’s jaw tightened.

He paused, taking a steadying breath, unclenching his fists.

“I know he was two years younger than me—just a kid. I didn’t mean to hurt him.” He cleared his throat. “At least, not as bad as I did.”

“I know.”

It had all happened so fast. And Ryan had done plenty to provoke it. She might not have heard what her girlfriends said behind their hands about her stepbrother, but she’d heard every word out of Ryan’s mouth as they stood at the bottom of the stadium steps.

“I don’t know, I guess I just... snapped.” Ric’s hands clenched and unclenched, his jaw tensing, releasing. “It was like he was suddenly every kid who’d made fun of me and called me Big Dick. If he hadn’t called me that...”

“I remember.”

“But when he hit you...”

“He didn’t,” she said softly. “You hit him first.”

“Well, he was
going
to hit you.” Those grey-green eyes of his smoldered as they found hers. “I just stopped his fist from hitting your face.”

She found herself replaying it all in her head. He was right. Ric’s right hand had crushed Ryan’s incoming fist. Then Ric’s left hook was so sudden, Ryan’s eyes had crossed before he’d staggered, then collapsed. She didn’t know his jaw was broken, not then, but Ryan howled, covering his head, turning over so he could retch on the grass.

She’d been frozen in absolute shock. Her friends appeared out of nowhere, and one of them called 911 while Ric talked down to her from his great height, but his voice was muffled, like it was coming from far away. He told her to come with him—she remembered that much—but her friends gathered around her like concerned hens, pushing her toward Ryan. And by then, both the principal and the football coach had appeared.

But she saw the hurt look in her stepbrother’s eyes as he turned and left.

“Did you know one of your friends sent me a hate-text right after that?” Ric nodded when Annalesa’s jaw dropped. “She said she was going to tell them it was unprovoked—she called me a sick fuck. You know why?”

“Why?” she asked, although she thought she knew.

“She said it was obvious I was in love with you, and I should go to jail for what I did to Ryan. For how I felt about you.”

“Oh Ric...” Her stomach was in knots.

“Then I had to deal with the cops.” Ric gritted his teeth. “While you were at the hospital—
with Ryan
.”

“It wasn’t my fault!” She couldn’t help defending herself, even though she’d promised him she would listen. “I was in shock! Everything happened at once. The principal practically tossed me into the ambulance with him, and you were already gone by then. I didn’t know they’d come to the house and talk to you!”

“I gave you the opportunity to come with me,” he reminded her darkly. “You refused. And then, when the cops asked you about what happened...”

“I couldn’t lie.” Her voice wanted to fail her. “My God, Ric, I was so scared. You know how I was about confrontation. I’d get sick just at the
thought
of having a fight with someone. I told them the truth—and they never charged you.”

“I didn’t want you to lie,” he said softly. “I just... I thought you’d have my back, Leesa. If I couldn’t trust
you,
who could I trust?”

“I never saw him again, after that day. I never even called him.”

“And your friends?”

“If I could go back and do it over again.” She took a deep breath. “Trust me, I’d tell all of them to fuck off on the spot.”

“But you didn’t.”

“I was...” She avoided his direct gaze. “Oh hell, I was a fucking coward. I know it. But I had to go to school with them! I had to see those girls every single day, and they could have made my life a living hell.”

“Like you made mine.”

“I...?” She lifted her chin and glared at him. “Goddamnit, Ric, before that day, I didn’t hear
any
of the things they said about you! I swear, they never said any of it around me. And after... when they started being mean? I guess they thought, after you hit Ryan, I’d be mad at you. They all took
his
side.
Poor Ryan
.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Finally, I told Jenny Goldman right to her face that if she didn’t stop talking down about you, I was going to tell everyone about her abortion
s
. Plural.”

“You did?”

“I think she got the message after that, and I’m pretty sure she told the rest of them. I know you like to hit first and ask questions later, but that’s not me. I know I didn’t make a big show of it but—I
did
cut them off. I did! And I did it because... fuck. I did it because I cared about you.
Do
care about you. Very much present tense.”

“You cut them off?”

“Yes! You know I did! I told you, in my email—after you went back to Norway. I told you how sorry I was—I told you I wasn’t with Ryan anymore, that I wasn’t going to talk to or see those skanky girls anymore...” She hugged herself at the memory, then looked up at him, seeing the confusion on his face with a slow, dawning realization of her own that left her cold.

“You never got my email, did you?”

“No.” He looked doubtful.

“Oh bloody hell, do you want me to find it in my Gmail?” She reached for her phone in the front pocket of her jeans. “I can prove it to you!”

“No, Leesa.” He waved her offer away. “I get it. You tried to tell me. But... why didn’t you try again? I mean, when I didn’t answer you...?”

“What, I was supposed to chase after you? Besides, like you said, sometimes a man doesn’t want to be followed, right?” Annalesa picked up the gun, flicked off the safety, and fired four quick rounds, missing the bullseye every time.

He stared at her, looking bewildered.

“I was a wreck.” She did her best to keep the tremble from her voice. “No friends and no you. Your email didn’t bounce back to me—I thought you
did
get it! I just thought you were giving me the silent treatment to punish me. I mean—it wouldn’t have been the first time.”