Bidding on the Billionaire (12 page)

Cade's nose nudged her earlobe, his breath warm on her neck.

“Me too. I spend my days looking forward to coming home just so I can talk to you. Most of the time, I didn't even bother taking off my tie. If you weren't home, I waited.” He turned and strode around the couch, then took a seat, depositing her in his lap. His soft lips skimmed the side of her neck, big hands sliding over her curves. His cock pushed into her ass, hard as granite in his pants. “I like the thought of you on this couch, fucking yourself with your fingers while thinking of me.”

A hot shudder raked through her. A soft, serrated breath left her mouth. God, the man could talk her right out of her panties.

He scraped the skin where her neck met her shoulder. “Let's make new memories on this couch, baby.”

She nodded, breathless, unable to deny she wanted, craved, and needed him to be inside of her. Now. God help her, but she needed the connection to him, to feel him with her, real and solid. It had been two days, but right then, it seemed a lifetime. She only had him for two weeks and she wanted as much of him as she could get before he went home and this ended.

They both moved at the same time, a desperate rush of activity as they attempted to shed enough clothing to come together. Cade pushed the front of his pants down enough to release his cock, then pulled a condom from the pocket of his pajamas. His gaze locked on her, eyes at half-mast and searing into her as he rolled the condom in place.

Hannah stood and shed her pajama bottoms, leaving them wadded on the floor at the base of the couch, then straddled his thighs. She locked her arms around his neck, buried her fingers in his thick hair, and sank onto him in one greedy stroke. Shivers raced across the surface of her sensitized skin.

His big warm hands closed around the globes of her bottom, his fingers digging into her skin, guiding their rhythm. Every sweet rocking of their hips rubbed her aching clit against his pelvis, and every thrust hurled her closer to the luscious abyss. She'd craved him all damn night. His thick cock buried inside of her, pumping hard into her. His big, soft hands sliding over her skin. Her body came alive beneath his touch, goose bumps popping up along her arms. So aroused, she already hung on the edge, already teetering.

His gaze never once left hers. The need and hunger in his eyes held her an all-too-willing captive. Something territorial flashed there, and something primal in her responded, her body rocking, thrusting harder against him even as his hands tightened on her ass, pulling her into him.

Her orgasm rushed up out of nowhere with a soundless
pop, pop, pop
. She gasped, bit her lower lip, and dropped her head back. A heady tidal wave washed over her, drowning her in bone-melting pleasure. She gasped and sighed in his lap. Beneath her, Cade's fingers bit into the flesh of her ass, his body shaking against her.

When the luscious quaking stopped, to be replaced by tiny aftershocks as her body came down from the rafters, she laid her forehead on his shoulder and tried to catch her breath. Cade wrapped his arms tight around her, and they sat for long moments holding each other in the aftermath.

When their breathing returned to normal, he turned his head and kissed the side of her neck, murmuring against her skin. “Hold on to me.”

She did, tightening her arms around his shoulders, because right then, she couldn't bring herself to let go. Hands on her bottom, he stood. His cock still buried inside of her, he carried her around the couch to the bedroom, slipping from her as he laid her on the bed.

In the darkness, with nothing but the streetlights beyond her window to light the room, he brushed a tender kiss across her mouth. “I'll be right back.”

He disappeared into the attached bathroom, returning a few minutes later. He shed his shoes and his clothing, then climbed in beside her, rolled her on her side, and curled around her, his body warm against her back.

How long they lay in silence, she didn't know, but despite her orgasm, she still couldn't sleep. Cade's body had yet to relax behind her.

Finally, his lips brushed the back of her neck and his arm tightened around her waist, drawing her closer. “That secret I promised I'd share with you?”

She found his hand and curled her fingers over his. “Yeah?”

He hesitated a moment, his body tensing against her back, then drew a breath and released it in a rush. “I have a son.”

His words were a bare murmur in the darkness. He'd told her the first day they met that he'd share when he was ready. Apparently, today was that day, and she took his confession for the gift it was. He spoke casually, as if he told her about his day, but the knowledge slid over her, an aching realization she could no longer deny. Over the last six months, they'd done this often, sharing triumphs, fears, disappointments. Things they might not have admitted to anyone else, but the space between them had always been sacred. It was easy talking to a faceless person, someone you knew you'd never meet. There was anonymity in it, a sense of safety.

She was awed that he'd share such an intimate detail with her, but her heart clenched all the same. The unbearable realization of exactly where she'd gotten herself settled over her. Oh for sure, he'd break her heart when he went home in a week and a half. After all, they were nothing more than temporary stops in each other's lives, a physical connection to make up for the lack they each felt in their lives. In the end, though, they'd still part ways. He'd go home, taking a piece of her with him, and she'd let him, because she needed the same from him in return.

The problem was, she had a feeling she'd miss him. Terribly. The thought filled her with questions she wasn't sure she wanted the answers to. Would their relationship change? Would they become distant and eventually drift apart? Or would it go back to the way it was? She didn't know. She didn't know what, exactly, she wanted, either. Only that as she lay in the shelter of his embrace, she felt close to him, and an emotion she didn't want to name or face twisted in her chest. Something that felt a lot like the first stirrings of love.

Neither could she ignore the pull of the intimacy his admission created between them.

She stroked her hand along his arm, his skin warm and the thick hairs soft beneath her fingers. “Tell me about him.”

He took a breath, as if he'd been holding it, and the tension drained from his body. It occurred to her what his admission must have meant to him. Like her scar, it was something he'd held back, something close to his heart, and he feared her reaction, the same way she had.

She threaded her fingers with his, hoping to somehow show him what she didn't have the words to say. To show him she understood.

He pressed another soft kiss to the back of her neck before settling again. “When I was seventeen, I got a girl pregnant. She didn't want to keep the baby. She told me she wanted an abortion. Unplanned or not, that baby was half mine. Part of
me
. I managed to talk her into putting the baby up for adoption instead. In the end, the adoptive mother agreed to an open adoption, so long as I agreed not to interfere with his life. She sends me pictures, letters with updates on how he is. He's thirteen now.”

Her heart twisted as her mind filled with what it must have cost him. A teenage pregnancy, then having to face giving up his child. Being forced to choose. It explained why he'd freaked the first time he'd forgotten to wear a condom, when they'd made love in the tub in his hotel room.

She squeezed his fingers in reassurance. “You miss him.”

He grunted in agreement. “I was young and immature. My father insisted we give up the baby. I didn't know enough to argue. My father is domineering. I know he means well, but he makes decisions and he expects you to follow them without question. I always have. And the more I thought about it, the more I had to admit he was right. I could barely take care of myself let alone a baby, but he and my girlfriend forced me to choose, and I hated them for it. It's why I got the tat. My father hated it, but the ink is a part of me, the same way Ethan is.

“That's his name. Ethan Alexander. He's five-ten already. Strong and smart. He looks like me. In the end, I did what I thought was best for him at the time. I got to meet the birth parents, to help choose. That was part of my acceptance. I wanted a say in where he went. And I liked her. She has a good heart.”

His choice of words didn't escape her notice.
At the time.

“But now? If you could do it over, would you do it differently?”

He released a heavy breath, the air stirring the soft hairs on the back of her neck. “Honestly? I don't know. The adoptive mother is a wonderful woman. She tells me all the time how grateful she is I gave him to her. She can't have children. She and her husband tried for years, but they were never successful. He's the light of her life, and she's an excellent mother. I can't begrudge her that. She tells me that when Ethan's old enough, if he wants to know, she'll give him my contact information. For now, it's enough I get to watch him grow up.”

She squeezed his arm in support. The pain and regret in his voice made her chest ache. “But you still miss him. I can hear it in your voice. You have regrets.”

“Mmm. I can't help wondering if I did the right thing, if I should have fought harder to keep him.” He was silent a moment; then his mouth nuzzled her neck, soft and distracted. His voice lowered to a vulnerable murmur against her skin. “I wanted him. Now I wonder if he'll hate me when he finds out, and I'm not sure I'd blame him if he did. Part of me is jealous. She gets things I'll never have. All those small, day-to-day things. Smiles. Hugs. He's
my
son. He wouldn't exist without me, but I'm a stranger to him. She gets to tuck him into bed at night and watch him sleep. Those are things I can't reconcile.”

Her heart ached for him. “Did you ever get to hold him? Before they handed him over?”

“Once. Right after he was born. They offered the same to the mother, but she didn't want to see him. She didn't want him at all, but his adoptive mother let me hold him. He was so tiny, but so perfect. He had a full head of dark hair.” Cade went silent for a moment, tension wafting off his body. After a moment, he released a heavy breath. “I think my heart claimed him, because letting him go was the hardest thing I've ever done. I almost took it back, changed my mind and my father be damned. But the look on the adoptive mother's face as she watched me. She had this anxiousness in her eyes, like maybe she knew what I was thinking. Or had the same fear. And I just knew he'd be okay.”

This time, she couldn't resist the pull, the need to somehow take his pain or soothe the raw wound. Hannah rolled over to face him. The room lay in darkness but there was enough light to make out his features. He was a shadow within a shadow, his eyes dark hollows within his face, but his gaze seared into her. She didn't have to ask to know he waited for her reaction. He'd laid his heart out before her, and she couldn't begin to tell him what that meant to her.

So, she caressed his cheek. His stiff stubble prickled her skin, course yet soft. “Thank you. For sharing, I mean.”

His hand slid over the curve of her hip to her bottom and he rolled onto his back, drawing her against his side. “I do a lot of things I probably shouldn't when I'm with you.”

She settled her head into the crook of his shoulder and slid her hand over his stomach. “Such as?”

His hand squeezed her bottom playfully and his tone lightened.

“Such as coming over at midnight in my pajamas because I have to see you.” He lifted his head, tucked his fingers beneath her chin and tipped her face to his, murmuring against her mouth as he sought hers in the darkness. He kissed her, the tender play of his lips over hers, then wrapped his arms tighter around her. “I'm addicted to you, Hannah Miller.”

His voice came as a husky murmur in the darkness, and an answering shudder swept down her spine.

“Ditto.” She kissed his chest then laid her head on the curve of his shoulder. His heartbeat had evened out, no longer erratic, nervous thumping, but a quiet, soothing pulse. The sound, along with the safety of his arms around her, lulled her, and in the comfortable silence, the old familiar memories rose. The dull, familiar ache throbbed in her chest and the need to share hit her hard. She shouldn't. What she ought to do was reinforce those boundaries, but neither could she stop the words from leaving her mouth. He'd shared with her, and she couldn't resist doing the same.

The way it always was with him when they talked. He lulled her into a sense of safety that scared the crap out of her. Because Cade had never felt like a stranger, but someone she'd known forever.

“After my parents died, I bounced around from foster home to foster home. Some were nice. Some weren't. When I was sixteen, they sent me to a group home. They had strict rules we had to follow. When meals were served, quiet time at night, curfew and bedtime. They even made sure we showered every day and took turns with the chores. Not everybody was nice. Some of the kids had been there nearly all their lives. Stuff got stolen. Fights happened. Bullies picked on the weaker, smaller kids. The usual kid stuff.”

His hands swept over her in a lazy, mindless fashion, up and down her back, over the curve of her hip and up her side, fingertips occasionally following her spine. It told her in no uncertain terms he listened. She couldn't deny the gestures soothed her. Nor could she deny talking to him felt as right as rain. Over the six months since they met on that message board, Cade had become an intimate confidante. When she met him at the Space Needle, she hadn't been sure what to expect, but lying in the dark in the shelter of his embrace, sharing her world, however painful it might have been at times, was the most natural thing in the world.

So she gave in to the lure. In a week and a half, this would end and they'd go back to…something, but their relationship, this intimacy would end. Now, she couldn't resist. She needed this.