Beyond the Rising Tide (34 page)

The Briar’s thorny vines begin encroaching on the crystal trees, like arms reaching out to capture anything light. I stop at the edge of a trench as wide as I am tall, and so deep I can’t see the bottom. This alone should stop me from going farther. But I’m already dead, so I don’t fear falling. I do wonder what would happen if I fell, but my imagination doesn’t come up with anything bad enough to worry me.

I back up a few paces, run, and leap over the trench, landing hard on the opposite side. A few more steps, and then I’m standing at the fringe of the Briar. So close that if I hold out my hand it will be sucked into the shadows.

I gaze into the black and untamed thicket, thorny bushes and gaunt trees leaning on one another as though the darkness here saps even the vegetation’s strength. Something in the shadows, in the thistles and tangled undergrowth, speaks to me. Tells me that my pain and sorrow is welcome here. That I belong here. It invites me to come in. To surrender to the shadows and dwell in them. From where I stand, it seems like such an appealing invitation.

But then I feel something else. Something rearing inside of me in resistance and objection. Experience and knowledge, gained from the life I lived on Earth. I lived in darkness as a child, and there was nothing comforting or appealing about it. Nothing that felt like
home
. The more I surrendered to it, the more painful it became. And I know now that there is something better than darkness.

I close my eyes and allow my thoughts to drift back to my last day with Avery. I feel her caring fingers on my face. The love, the healing that flowed from her and into me. And then I ask myself,
If that’s the alternative to darkness, what am I doing here?

I open my eyes and turn around to leave, and Charles is standing right behind me. I fall back a step in surprise.

He reaches out to catch me by the shirt, as though afraid I’ll stumble backward into the Briar. When he’s convinced I’ll stay upright, he releases me. “You scared me for a minute there,” he says. His face is worried, and has grown even younger since the last time I saw him. He looks maybe in his late forties now, and if I hadn’t been observing his transformation over the past months, I wouldn’t even recognize him.

“Don’t tell me you’ve been watching me.”

He gives a small guilty smile. “Only keeping tabs.” He scowls over my shoulder at the Briar like it’s a drug dealer who just tried to sell me crack. “Why don’t you come with me and we’ll have a talk. Like old times.”

I shrug in agreement, and we quicken away from the Briar to where the lakeshore is smooth again, and find a place to sit under the branches of one of the weeping trees.

“You have a decision to make,” he says when we settle on a patch of soft blue grass.

I’m sitting cross-legged, and I notice that the soles of my feet are already completely healed. “About what?”

“What to do next.”

I let my eyes sweep over the expanse of the silver lake, from where it touches the rocky banks of the Briar to the other end where it holds a perfect reflection of the majestic cliffs of Elysium. “I’ve already decided. I’m waiting.”

“Kai, you can’t just do nothing until Avery comes. You could be waiting for decades. And by then … she may have—”

“Don’t say it.” I drop my head in my hands. “I know. I realize I’m being overly optimistic. But I’m waiting anyway.”

“It’s not just that she might not be …
available
when she comes. You’re putting yourself in danger.”

I lift my head. “How so?”

“Those who linger too long on the banks of Demoror tend to get … lost.”

I know what he means even before he nods in the direction of the Briar. I felt the darkness trying to lure me inside moments ago. I sigh. “If I leave the lake, what if I miss her when she comes?”

“You’ll know when she gets here.”

I raise a curious eyebrow. “How?”

“The same way you found her on Earth.” He motions to his chest. “You’ll feel it here. That connection, that pull, between you and those you love. You only have to be paying attention.”

Maybe he’s right. When I went back to Earth to help Avery, I could always sense when she was near. At least when I was paying attention. My chest aches now with the desire to see her again. “Charles,” I say, “can I see her? Just once?”

He lets out a tired sigh. “Remember our deal, Kai.”

“I only want to see if she’s okay. She’s got to have a million questions after what she saw.”

He gives me a wary look. “What did she see, exactly?”

“Well, I showed her I didn’t have a heartbeat. She passed out.” I wince. “And then … I sort of disappeared in her arms.”

He shakes his head slowly, maybe because he can’t quite grasp the mess I’ve gotten myself into.

“Can’t you just … show me one glimpse in the lake?” I ask.

“No.”

“Then … can you pay her a visit and explain things so she doesn’t think she’s losing her mind?”

He rubs his knee for a long moment, and then shakes his head. “I can’t do that. I broke the rules by letting you keep the ring those three days. Please don’t ask me to do anything else.”

“But this isn’t a big deal. It’s a little conversation. Please.”

His mouth sets in a firm line. I know the look. It’s the look of immovability. “No. You promised. I gave you three days, and you promised to let her go. I kept my end of the deal. Now it’s your turn to keep yours.”

My shoulders sink, and I shut my eyes and clench my jaw in frustration at my powerlessness. I know he’s right, though. No matter how hard it is, I made him a promise, and it’s time for me to keep it.

He pats me on the shoulder. “What you need is something to keep you busy. So, I have a new job to offer you.”

I blink in surprise, hope rising in my chest. “I thought I couldn’t go back to Earth.”

He shakes his head. “It’s not on Earth.”

“Oh.” I look down at the grass and run my toe through it, hoping he won’t see how disappointed I am. “What’s the job?”

He pulls something out of his pocket. A pendant attached to a fine silver chain. The pendant appears to be a raw crystal with a shimmering vein of light coiled inside.

“Wow,” I say, fascinated by the glimmering thread inside the crystal. “What does that do?”

He hands it to me. “Here—put it on and you’ll see.”

I take it and hang it around my neck. As soon as it touches my chest, the crystal lights up like a halogen light, practically blinding me. I flinch at the unexpected brilliance and cover it with my hand so that I can open my eyes again. “Whoa. What is this job, exactly? Dental assistant?”

Charles smiles at my dumb joke, and then his face goes serious. “It’s dark in the Briar. Sometimes all people need is a bit of light to find their way out.”

I stare at him. “Weren’t you just saying how worried you were that I’d get lost in there?”

He nods at the pendant. “You won’t get lost as long as you’re wearing that.”

I look back toward the Briar, an eerie sense of dread coming over me. “And what’s my assignment?”

“It’s simple, in theory. You’re a guide. The goal is to lead people out of the Briar and bring them back here to the lakeshore.”

“What happens when they get here?”

“That’s when a mentor will be assigned to them, like I was assigned to you. They’ll be offered a job and more guidance.”

I gaze at the Briar, considering. It seems like such a dreary job. Especially after standing at the edge of the Briar and feeling how strong the dark pull was. If I go in, I don’t know if I’ll have the strength to handle it, even with the pendant. What if I never find my way back out?

Charles must see my hesitation, because he says, “You don’t have to accept the job, but if you don’t, you’ll need to come with me to Elysium. There are other things for you to do there.”

I inhale a deep breath and exhale slowly, unsure what to do. “Charles,” I say, “is there music in Elysium?”

He regards me a moment, pursing his lips. “Why don’t you come there with me and see for yourself? You won’t be disappointed.”

“And if I do, I’ll know when Avery gets here?”

“Yes. My wife was in Elysium when I came, and she knew right away.”

Maybe it’s time to stop resisting. I don’t know why I’m so afraid to go there. Maybe I fear I won’t belong. Or maybe I’ve gotten used to Demoror, and I don’t like change. Or maybe it’s one step farther from Avery. But as I consider the alternative, I can’t imagine stepping inside the dark Briar. I stand and remove the glowing pendant and hand it back to Charles. I nod at him, wordlessly telling him that I’ve chosen to go to Elysium.

He stands and lays a hand on my shoulder, and we quicken away. At the place where we stop, the cliffs of Elysium rise from our feet to the sky. The pearlescent white rock is smooth like polished opal, and the waterfall entrance to Elysium appears to fall in slow motion. There’s no mist or splashing when it hits the ground, no pool to collect the water. It simply vanishes into the ground, like a thread being pulled through fabric. I’ve never seen it from this close before, and I’m mesmerized by the strange movement of the water. Like a thousand-foot-long curtain gently undulating in the breeze. I tip my head back, following the waterfall to its source. But it’s so high I can’t see it. It just fades into a shimmering blur.

“You ready?” Charles asks. He’s standing beside me, his face encouraging.

I look back the way we came, since I didn’t really see any of it when we quickened here. We’re in a sort of circular courtyard, closed in by a low rock wall. The ground is heavily sprinkled with little sparkling flowers the color of Avery’s eyes. Beyond the wall, the land gracefully drops and expands into wide grassy fields and groves of crystal trees. If this is what’s on the outside of Elysium, I can only imagine what I’ll find inside.

I turn back to the waterfall, then reach out and hesitantly touch the hazy water. A surge of peace flows from the waterfall into me. I close my eyes, reveling at the warmth that fills my chest. It reminds me of the way I felt when Avery touched me. Or when I heard her voice say my name. It’s the feeling I’ve ached for since returning to Demoror. Like touching the doorknob of a home filled with the people I love. Like hearing my little sisters laugh. Like my mother’s embrace.

“Charles,” I say, turning to him, “where’s my mom? I … I can’t move on until I know for sure.”

His expression turns careful, then grave. He holds up a finger. “Wait here for a minute.” He turns and steps into the waterfall, and it swallows him up. I want to follow, to hear for myself the answer to my question. But he asked me to stay, so I keep my feet planted.

A few minutes later, he emerges from the waterfall and steps up to me. “They said you’re strong enough now.”

“Strong enough for what?”

“To know where she is.”

Something sinks inside of me, and I’m suddenly afraid to learn the answer. Because I already know where she is.

He dips into his pocket and retrieves the guide pendant, handing it to me. “If you want to find your mom, you’ll need this.”

’ve been parked across the street from Kai’s sisters’ house for thirty minutes, trying to summon the courage to go knock on their door. It’s a late July afternoon, and the sun filters through the big tree in their front yard, casting fluttery shadows on the white clapboard. It’s also shining through my windshield, heating up the inside of my Cherokee, and beads of sweat are gathering on my forehead and making my palms slick.

I’ve known for weeks now who died saving my life, and I’ve yet to tell anyone. Sometimes I think it would be better if no one ever found out. But his sisters must know that Kai is missing, and the uncertainty of his whereabouts must torment them. They’ll be devastated to find out what happened to him, but at least they’ll know the truth.

I gaze at the lace curtains and bite my nails, wondering how on earth I’m going to get through this. More than anything, I want to turn my car around and leave. I could go to the sheriff’s detective instead and tell him that I finally recognized Kai on a missing persons report. And then he can be the one to tell Kai’s family.

I try to think what Kai would want. Would he want his sisters to hear it from a cop? Or from the girl whose life he saved, who can give the details of how their brother died a hero? Maybe that’s why he left his aunt and uncle’s address in the book of lyrics he gave me, because he wanted me to be the one to tell them.