A loud knock on her bedchamber door woke Selina at seven the next morning. The servants knew she didn’t enjoy getting up early. There must be another tenant who needs her, she thought.
“Selina, please let me in.”
Hearing the worried tone of Mrs. Roberts, Selina assumed the worst. Perhaps their quick bedchamber move last night didn’t work and the duke had discovered that she was living under his nose. “Come in.”
Mrs. Roberts walked into the room and went directly to the linen press. “Get up, girl,” she said as she pulled out a cotton dress.
“What is going on?”
“His Grace just called for Zeus to be saddled. He said he was heading to the earl’s lands. We can’t take the chance he means to go to Mrs. Featherstone’s house and check on you.”
“Why would he do that?”
“He confessed to Mr. Roberts that he had seen you last night by the pond and that you had run away. The duke said he’d wanted you to stay the night here because of the rain and darkness. He searched for over two hours trying to find you last night.”
“Two hours?” Selina whispered.
“Yes. He finally decided you must have returned to Mrs. Featherstone’s cottage.” Mrs. Roberts laced up Selina’s stays. “He appeared very worried.”
Or worried that she might tell someone that he kissed her, she thought. “I doubt he cared whether I made it to Mia’s house or not.”
Mrs. Roberts draped the green cotton dress over Selina’s head. “Of course he cares. But he is a troubled man. When I found him in your room last night, he looked slightly mad. He was soaked to the bone from searching for you.”
She’d barely slept last night from the guilt of leaving him in the rain. Selina nodded. “Thank you again for all your help last night.”
“Selina, you must be more cautious with the candles.”
“I will not use them unless I know he has retired.” As Mrs. Roberts buttoned up her dress, Selina asked, “How did you get everything out of that room before he arrived?”
“Randall detained him for a few moments. Just long enough to get the tub out of your room and into the bedchamber across the hall.”
Selina smiled, remembering the commotion of five footmen, Mrs. Roberts, and a few maids all getting her items out of the room before the duke arrived. This was not safe for them. “I really should consider moving to Mia’s house. It is not right that I put you and the other servants in a position that could cost you your jobs.”
“Hush,” Mrs. Roberts scolded. “You will do no such thing. Just remember to pull the bell five times like you did last night should we need to move you quickly.”
“I will, thank you.” Selina adjusted the bodice of her dress. “I can’t make it all the way to Mia’s house before the duke. He will have a head start on me.”
Mrs. Roberts pulled Selina’s hair up into a tight chignon. “No, he will need to dress and eat first. He always eats a large breakfast. While he does that, Mr. Sellers has a lad who will ride with you until you are at least halfway to the earl’s lands. He will take your horse and you will start walking toward Northrop Park as if you are coming to check on a tenant.”
Selina blew out a breath and then started to dress. “What do I tell him if he sees me and stops?”
“Tell him you are going to check on Mrs. Wells.”
Something she had to do today anyway. He wouldn’t question her motive. “Very well.”
Once dressed, she headed for the stables where a stableboy waited with a horse for her. “We’ll ride for thirty minutes and then I’ll take yer horse back through the woods so His Grace don’t see me.”
“Thank you, James.”
They rode out quickly, heading toward the Earl of Hartsfield’s lands. Selina wished she could ride like this all the time. It would make getting to the tenants’ homes so much quicker, but she couldn’t afford a horse. Once they reached the earl’s property, she stopped her mare and jumped down.
“Here you go, James,” she said, handing him the reins. “Be safe and don’t let the duke see you.”
“I will, miss.”
As she walked back toward Northrop Park, her heart filled with warmth at all the tenants and servants were doing for her. They were putting their own lives at stake to help her. She owed them everything and could only pay them back by healing them when sick.
She pulled the pins out of her hair and rubbed her head. There was nothing worse than having her hair up in a chignon. It gave her headaches.
After walking for a few minutes, she heard the sound of a horse galloping closer. She looked up to see the duke gaining on her. His coattails flew out behind him as he rode. She paused for a moment and stared at the handsome man approaching her. A spark of excitement coursed through her.
He slowed his pace when he caught sight of her. “What are you about this morning, Miss White?”
The horse stopped close enough that she could pat his head. The friendly beast nuzzled her cheek. “I am walking to Mrs. Wells’s home.”
“At this hour?”
“By the time I arrive on foot, it will be close to nine. I’m quite certain she will be awake.” If the poor woman had slept at all last night. Selina dreaded going back to the house. She had lain awake for hours last night, attempting to determine what had happened during the pregnancy. No answer had ever come to her. And when she wasn’t thinking about Susan Wells, their kiss occupied her thoughts for hours. Even now, she couldn’t help but stare at his molded lips and wonder how it would feel if he kissed her again. Enough of that nonsense, she scolded herself. He was betrothed.
“You have no horse?” he asked softly.
Selina rolled her eyes. “How would I afford one, Your Grace? The tenants pay me with what they have . . . a chicken, a bottle of wine or gin; they don’t have much.”
He climbed down from the large chestnut horse and stood next to her. “I have never thought about it. Of course, I tried to find you last night so you might have stayed at my home. It wouldn’t be so long of a walk from there.”
“It would be highly improper to stay overnight at the home of an unmarried man,” she retorted.
“Hmm.” He sounded terribly unconvinced.
“What do you mean by that?”
“I just don’t envision you as the type of woman who cares so much about propriety.”
She stopped walking and stared at him. “I cannot believe you said that about me!”
“Indeed. Most women your age would never be seen in public wearing their hair down. Only a woman’s husband should see her hair unbound and flowing down her back.”
Heat instantly burned across her cheeks. “I have no maid to assist me with my hair.”
“Ahh,” he said, looking up at the blue sky. “Lack of funds. Still, I cannot believe it’s all that difficult to put your hair up into a chignon. A few twists and pins should do it.”
Her jaw tightened in frustration. But there was nothing she could say in her defense. There was no reason for not putting up her hair, except that she liked it down. “The pull of my hair gives me headaches. Something a man would never understand.”
He nodded. “I see.”
She did wonder why he hadn’t mentioned their kiss last night. If nothing else, he should offer her an apology. A proper gentleman would do that, she reasoned.
“I need to continue on,” she said.
“May I walk with you?”
“I cannot stop you from walking your lands, Your Grace.” Perhaps he needed time to determine the best way to say he was sorry.
“I suppose I should speak with both Mr. and Mrs. Wells,” he said stiffly.
“Very well, then.” Selina moved forward and he kept pace with his horse trailing behind.
After a few minutes of silence, he finally asked, “Why do you do this?”
“Do what?”
“Care for the sick, deliver the babies and everything else you do.”
“Who else will?” She cast him a sideways glance, noting the way his coat cut across his broad shoulders.
“A physician, perhaps?” he offered.
Selina laughed. “The only physician is in the village and he’s a drunken sod. I wouldn’t let him touch a soul on this property.”
“But why
you
?”
“Because I am of the same blood as my mother and her mother before her. This is what we do and have done for centuries.”
“But couldn’t someone else do it?” He held up a hand to stop her interruption. “I mean what if something happened to you? Or what if you wanted to go to London for a fortnight?”
Selina laughed. “London? Why would I want to go there? All those people in that small space, it must be rife with disease.”
Colin looked at her in confusion. Had she never been to London? Was it possible that she’d never seen the most important city in the world? Why did he have a sudden urge to show her everything in town?
“London is beautiful,” he said slowly. “There are museums and parks, the opera, and wonderful shopping. Why wouldn’t you want to see London?”
She laughed again. “And there is poverty and sickness. Why would I want to see that? If I need to buy something, I go to the village. But here I have all this,” she said, sweeping her arm at the vista.
He couldn’t fault her eyesight. His lands were beautiful rolling fields that seemed to go on forever. Looking around, he realized just how much he’d missed visiting this particular estate.
“Thank you,” he said softly.
She stopped and then looked up at him with a frown. “For what? That kiss? I most certainly didn’t mean to let you kiss me.”
He laughed gruffly. She wanted an apology for their kiss. “I was saying thank you for taking such good care of my tenants and servants.”
“I am just doing my job, Your Grace.”
“When we are alone, I wouldn’t mind if you called me North or Colin.”
“No, Your Grace. That implies an intimacy that we should not have.”
He smiled again. In fact, he couldn’t remember smiling this much in one day in years. “Hmm, perhaps it’s an intimacy that would help us to get along with each other better.”
“I highly doubt calling you by your Christian name will help us get along.” She started walking again and he tagged along.
“I do believe you’re wrong. Already, we are having a pleasant conversation and all it took was a kiss.”
She turned on him with her eyes flashing like emeralds. “A kiss you stole. A kiss for which I never gave my permission—”
“Asking permission for a kiss takes all the excitement out of it. If I were to ask you for permission to kiss you right now, the kiss would be as dull as a Sunday sermon.”
She put her hands on her hips. “Some Sunday sermons are very awe-inspiring.”
“Indeed. Perhaps I am wrong.” He frowned. “But how would I know if I am? I believe there is only one way to discover if my theory is correct.” He bowed deeply in front of her. “Miss White, would you allow me a kiss?”
“No!”
His lips twitched. “Of course not. Why would anyone want to suffer from a dull kiss?”
“That is not my reason at all,” she exclaimed. “You are betrothed. You are here planning your wedding and yet you kissed me. As it is, you still owe me an apology for that kiss last night. It was completely improper.”
As he stared down at her heart-shaped face, the urge for another kiss overwhelmed him. “I shall never apologize for that kiss, Miss White. You needed comforting and I needed . . .”
His voice trailed off as he thought about what he needed. He needed to know that someday he might feel human again. And for some odd reason, the kiss of a wise woman gave him that feeling once more. Why would the one woman he should despise cause him to act so . . . so . . . much like a libertine?
“Exactly what did you need, Your Grace?” she asked in a knowing tone.
“Nothing important,” he mumbled in reply.
“Humph.”
“And I’m not betrothed,” he said softly.
She halted. “You are not to be married?”
He almost laughed at her gape-mouthed expression. “No. And if I was, I would never dishonor my betrothed by kissing another woman.”
“Oh,” she said with a frown. She took a step and then spun around. “Then who is getting married?”
“My sister, Kate.”
“Oh.”
They walked a few more minutes in silence until they came upon the Wellses’ cottage. For once, he seemed to have struck her speechless. He rather liked that. He slid a glance to her and noticed she still seemed to be unable to utter a word. Had she really thought that he was the one getting married? He would have to ask her about that sometime, but not now. His stomach ached as he stopped and stared at their home. He supposed that as duke he should be the first to give his sympathies. But he didn’t want to. He wanted to run from this place.
“I don’t want to go in.”