Betting On Love (24 page)

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Authors: Cheris Hodges

BOOK: Betting On Love
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Once they were in bed, Jade snuggled up next to James, resting her head against his chest, but she didn't fall asleep. Nervousness flowed through her body as she thought about telling James that she was pregnant.
What if he doesn't want children? What are you going to do then?
Jade rolled over onto her side, with her back facing James. Seconds later he had his arm around her waist.
“I'm not even going to ask what's wrong, because you're going to say nothing,” he said, his voice thick with sleep.
“There isn't anything wrong,” she said.
“Uh-huh,” he said, leaning his head against her shoulder. “Relax and go to sleep, all right?”
“Yes, sir,” she said, patting his cheek gently. Jade closed her eyes, but sleep didn't come easily. Her torturous dreams were filled with images of James rejecting her and their child.
 
 
The next morning James was up early, with a smile on his face. He went into the kitchen to prepare Jade a simple breakfast in bed. Despite what she'd said all night, he knew something was wrong. Maybe it was the stress of starting the restaurant; maybe there was something going on in Atlanta that she didn't want to talk about.
As he cracked eggs, James tried to shut his mind off to the doubt that was creeping in. Part of him couldn't help but wonder if she and Stephen did try to see if they could work out their problems.
Stop it,
he chided himself silently as he flipped the eggs in the pan.
After the eggs were done, he brewed a pot of coffee and dropped some bread in the toaster. He topped off their breakfast with a couple of links of turkey sausage and placed their plates on a tray. He crept back into the bedroom and watched Jade as she slumbered. She looked like an angel against the white cotton sheets. He was happy that she was getting some rest after she'd tossed and turned all night, and he almost felt guilty about waking her up to eat. Still, watching her made him think about what it would feel like to wake up every morning with her by his side. Was he really ready to settle down and get married?
Jade had awakened feelings in him that no other woman had. He craved her presence, yearned for her touch, and was aroused by the sound of her voice. Staring at her in this moment, he saw the other half of himself and the woman that he'd wait at the altar for. Setting the tray on the nightstand, James eased into the bed, beside her, and brushed his lips across her cheek. “Wake up, Sleeping Beauty,” he said.
Like butterfly wings, her eyes fluttered open. “Is it morning already?” she grumbled.
“Yes, and I made breakfast, so you don't have to get up.” James held a buttery triangle of toast to her lips.
Jade didn't take a bite; instead, she bolted from the bed as if she had been stung by a bee and dashed into the bathroom. James sniffed the bread, wondering if the butter was spoiled. Placing the toast back on the plate, he crossed over to the bathroom and knocked on the door.
“Jade, are you all right?”
All he got in response to his query was the sound of Jade vomiting. Part of him wanted to kick the door in. What had made her sick? Just as he was about to open the door, Jade walked out, with a lopsided grin on her face. “What a way to start the morning,” she remarked.
“Are you sick?”
She shook her head. “Not exactly.”
“So, was it the food or my morning breath?”
Jade sucked her bottom lip between her teeth and closed her eyes.
James drew her into his arms. “Baby, what's wrong?”
She shook her head and blinked rapidly before saying, “I don't know for sure. When I get home, I'm going to the doctor.”
“Is this what's been troubling you?”
“Yes,” she said quietly.
“It's probably just a bug or something. You'll be fine, and I tell you, I feel like going to Atlanta, if you'll have me. I do owe you a visit.”
She smiled, but the smile didn't reach her eyes. “All right. When?”
“This morning. Just let me call the office and clear my calendar. We can go have dinner with my mother, depending on what your doctor says.”
“You don't have to come today,” she said nervously. “Besides, I'm sure you don't want to sit in a doctor's office, waiting on me.”
James stepped back from her. “What's the real deal?” he asked.
Closing her eyes, she blurted out, “I think I might be pregnant.”
James nearly lost his balance as her words sank in. “Pre-pregnant? Do you know for sure?”
“No, that's why I'm going to the doctor. I took three home pregnancy tests, and they all had the same result.”
“All right,” James said, taking a deep breath. “Why don't we just find out who Kenya's doctor is and see if we can get an appointment so that you don't have to drive back to Atlanta with this on your mind?”
A look of relief spread across Jade's face. “Thanks,” she said.
“You know that if you are pregnant, there's only one thing for us to do.”
She narrowed her eyes at him. “And just what is that?”
James folded his arms across his chest. “Get married.”
Jade nearly swooned at James's suggestion. “What did you say?”
“I think you heard me.”
She inhaled and ran her hand over her face. “James ...”
“I'm old-fashioned, and if there is a baby, I'm going to take care of my responsibilities.”
“That doesn't mean you have to marry me. How long will we be together before you start regretting giving up your life because ...”
James lifted her chin and looked directly into her eyes. “I'm not giving up anything. I'm going to be able to go to sleep with you every night, wake up with you every morning, and you're giving me a gift that—”
“That you may not want,” Jade said. “How can we get married when we barely know each other?”
“I know I want to be a major part of my child's life, and the best way to do that is to be married to his or her mother.”
Jade pushed him in the chest. “Sounds so romantic,” she said sarcastically. “When I get married, I don't want it to be out of some sense of obligation. Because you and I both know you wouldn't be proposing marriage if we didn't think I was pregnant.”
“All right. Fine,” he said. “I'm going to call Kenya and see about getting you an appointment with her doctor.”
Jade couldn't continue her argument, because a wave of nausea washed over her and she ran back to the bathroom.
What are you doing?
she thought as she hugged the toilet.
If James wants to marry you, why are you fighting him on it? Do you really want to be another baby's mother? He didn't even ask you if the child was his. He just wanted to step up to the plate.
Jade rose to her feet and rinsed her mouth and held on to the sink.
“Jade,” James called out, “are you all right in there?”
“I'm fine,” she replied as she walked out of the bathroom. “James, I'm sorry.”
“About what?”
“Bringing all this confusion into your life,” she said. “I understand you want to do the right thing, but don't feel—”
“You didn't make this baby alone,” he said. “And you're not going to raise it alone. Kenya's doctor can see you at one thirty.”
She nodded and looked at the clock on the wall. “I'd better call Serena.”
CHAPTER 26
Jade watched James as they drove to the doctor's office. She was happy that Serena had agreed to take her car back to Atlanta and that James had agreed to take her home as soon as she was ready to go. What was she going to do if her suspicions turned out to be true? Would she and James really get married, and if they did, would the marriage last?
“We're here,” James said as he pulled up to the Carolinas Medical Center facility.
Jade got out of the car, then walked slowly.
James slowed his pace and waited for her. “Jade,” he said, “baby, everything is going to be fine.” It was almost as if he could read her nervousness.
She smiled at him tentatively as he held the door open for her. “I know. I'm just a little scared.”
“Why?” he inquired.
She shrugged her shoulders and, with a pensive look on her face, said, “I'm not sure I can do this. If there is a baby, how do I know I'm going to be a good mother? It's not like I grew up with the best parents in the world. They spent most of my childhood fighting like cats and dogs and cheating on each other, as if it was some kind of sport.”
James hugged her gently as they took a seat in the waiting room. “We're not our parents,” he said. “My father was the biggest asshole that ever lived. I promised myself if I ever got married and had children, I'd be there for them in ways that my father wasn't there for my mother and me.”
“What if we fail at this and do something to damage our child?” she mused. “I don't know if ...”
“What are you saying?” he asked. “Do you want to have this child?”
“Yes, of course, but I can't help but wonder about these things.”
“I'm here to support you, and when we get married, I'm not going to be one of those dads who expect you to do everything. We're going to be partners in every sense of the word.”
Jade turned away from him, willing the tears in her eyes to just stay there. She'd dreamed of being proposed to, and there was champagne, roses, and chocolate. Not the feeling of an obligation or a duty to a baby. What about real love? What about desire?
James stroked her back. “Jade?”
“Yes?” she said, wiping her eyes before facing James.
“What's the matter?”
She opened her mouth, about to say the things that she'd been thinking, but a nurse walked into the waiting room and called her name. She and James stood up quickly, nearly bumping heads, and walked over to the nurse. “Follow me,” the nurse said, smiling at them.
As they walked into the examination room, James kissed Jade's hand. His touch said that everything was going to be all right. But Jade wondered how long it would be before he stopped touching her, period. This wasn't a bygone era where they were supposed to get married because she was pregnant.
The nurse took Jade's temperature and blood pressure, then said, “The doctor will be in momentarily.”
“Thanks,” Jade replied.
James took her hand in his and stroked it with his thumb. “Nervous?”
“That's one way to describe it,” she said softly.
“Once we find out what's going on, then we can move forward,” he said.
“Where are we going? Is marriage really the right thing if I am pregnant?”
Before James could respond, the doctor walked in. “Good afternoon,” he said.
James and Jade responded to his greeting.
The bushy-haired doctor smiled at them. “So, you two think that there's a baby? Excited?”
Jade smiled nervously and nodded.
“Well,” the doctor said, “I'm going to need to take some blood and do a pelvic exam. When I do the exam, sir, I'm going to need you to leave the room.”
“All right,” James said. He looked at Jade, who had a tense look on her face.
A female nurse walked into the examination room to assist the doctor. James waited until the blood was drawn and then left the room. As soon as he walked out of the room, his cell phone rang.
“Hello?” he said.
“Tell me why you and Jade needed Kenya's OB's number?” Maurice asked.
“Damn. Do you two tell each other everything?”
“James, you didn't get her pregnant, did you?”
“So what if I did?” James growled. “I don't see how it's any of your business.”
“All right,” Maurice said. “I know I said I was going to give Jade a fair shake. But this whole pregnancy thing is a little suspicious.”
“I'm going to hang up on you before I say something that I might regret in a month or so.”
“What if she is pregnant?”
“Then I'm going to do the right thing.”
“Which is?”
“Marry her and be a father to my child.”
“Have you lost your damned mind?” Maurice boomed. “How in the hell are you going to marry a woman you've known for about two months?”
“How long did you know Lauryn before you asked her to marry you? Look how that turned out.”
“Okay. How long are you going to throw my mistake in my face? I'm trying to stop you from making one,” said Maurice.
“I love her,” James said.
“And if you keep saying it, you might convince yourself,” Maurice shot back.
James pressed the end button on the phone and shook his head.
 
 
Jade closed her eyes as the doctor began the pelvic exam. A part of her wanted to have James's child and the life he'd been telling her they'd have as husband and wife. She knew that their son or daughter would grow up feeling protected, unlike the way she had. But what kind of marriage would they really have? Would the fire between them fizzle at some point? Would James just look at her as an obligation?
“All right, Miss Christian,” the doctor said. “We're done. I can have your results in a few hours and will give you a call.”
Jade sat up on the table and nodded. “I put my cell phone number on my form,” she said.
“Okay. Well, you can get dressed and head out,” replied the doctor. “Do you want me to send your husband back in?”
“He's not ... yes,” she said.
The doctor nodded, and he and the nurse left the examination room. Jade released a sigh and pulled her cell phone out to call Serena. She figured her friend should've made it back to Atlanta already.
“Are you knocked up?” Serena asked.
“Hello to you, too,” Jade said.
“I'm hoping you're calling me to tell me that you're not pregnant.”
“I don't know,” Jade said. “But if I am, James wants to get married.” Silence greeted her from the other end of the phone. “Serena?”
“I hope you said no. What does he think this is? The fifties? People don't just get married because there's a baby involved.”
Jade sighed, knowing she had called the wrong person. “Whatever,” she said.
“My God, you're considering it!” Serena shrieked. “Are you insane?”
“So what if I am? You know how I grew up,” Jade said. “If I'm pregnant, I don't want my child to be faced with what I went through growing up.”
“And marrying a near stranger is going to make your child's life better?”
“I've got to go,” Jade said as James walked into the room. She hung up the phone over Serena's protest and hopped off the table.
“What did he say?” James asked.
“The test results should be back in a few hours,” she said.
“Want to go get something to eat?” he asked.
She nodded. “That's fine. I just want to get—,” she began, but her cell phone started to chirp. She was surprised that it wasn't Serena and curious that it was Kandace. She held her finger up to James as she answered the call. “Hello.”
“Hey,” Kandace said. “You know, Serena told us that you think you're pregnant.”
“I figured that,” Jade replied.
“Did you tell James?”
“Yes.”
“Good.”
“Uh, James and I are about to leave the doctor's office,” Jade said, alerting her friend that she couldn't really talk.
“I love you, Jade, and I wouldn't try to tell you what to do, but make this decision with James,” Kandace said sagely.
“I will,” Jade said. “And thanks.”
“Call me later, okay?”
“I will,” Jade said. She hung up the phone and turned to James. “Let's go.”
“Everything all right?”
“Yeah,” she said. “You know news spreads fast.”
“Your girls?”
Jade nodded as they headed to the lobby. “Let's just eat and not talk about them or anything else.”
“Avoiding the subject isn't going to make it go away,” he said.
She rolled her eyes as they walked out of the building. “I know this. But do we have to think about it every second and every moment?”
“Fine,” he said, not wanting to argue with her.
“James,” she said, “I don't want to make this a bigger issue than it needs to be.”
“I don't think it gets much bigger than a baby,” he said flatly as they got into the car.
“I know that, but we don't even know if there is a baby yet and ...”
“And if there is a baby, I stand by what I said. I want to marry you.”
“And if there isn't a baby, then what? Do I still get the ring and the wedding?” Jade snapped. “I told you, I don't want you to marry me out of an obligation to our child.”
“Would you rather I walk away so you and your friends can talk about what a bastard I am? What the hell do you want from me, Jade?”
“Nothing,” she said. “Nothing at all.”
James focused on the road, not responding to Jade. Anger surged through his system. How could she sit there and say she didn't want anything from him when he was offering her everything?
They pulled up to the restaurant and James slammed out of the car, leaving Jade sitting on the passenger side, with a blank look on her face.
Moments later she walked into the restaurant and took a seat across from James at the booth he'd chosen in the rear of the dining area.
“James,” she said, her voice low. “When I said what I said, it wasn't—”
“Did the doctor call?” he asked as he picked up the menu.
“No. James, please,” she said, grabbing his hand. “Listen to me.”
“What, Jade? What do you have to say now that you haven't already said?”
She closed her eyes and placed her hands flat on the table. “James, I don't want us to make a mistake,” she said quietly. “I don't want you to feel as if you're giving up your life because we both made mistakes.”
“
I
made the mistake,” he said. “I should've been more careful and protected us every time we made ... had sex. But don't fault me for wanting to give my child something I didn't have.”
“Don't you think I want our child to have a better childhood than I had?” Jade said. “But what kind of life are we going to have if we ...”
“Do you think I would've asked you to marry me if I didn't think our relationship would work?” James asked. “It wasn't like I hated you when we made this child.”
“If there is a child.”
“And if there isn't a child, do you think I'm going to take away my proposal?”
Her eyes stretched to the size of silver dollars. “What are you saying?”
“I'm saying that I love you, whether you're pregnant or not,” James said. “But if this isn't what you want, let me know.”
She looked away from him. Of course this was what she wanted, but did he want this as well? Granted, James was saying all the right things, but were they true and lasting?
“I'm not ... I don't know what ... James, are you sure? When I get married, I want it to be forever,” she said.
“And you think I don't? What kind of man do you think I am? Do you really think I would ask you to marry me and not want it to last? Child or no child, I want you in my life today, tomorrow, forever.”
The tears that welled up in her eyes this time were tears of joy. “James, if you mean it, then yes, I will marry you,” she said.
James leaned across the table and kissed her lips gently. “Thank you,” he said, then kissed her again, this time with passion and fire that made her knees buckle.

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