Better (Too Good series) (25 page)

“Oliver, I’ll kill you! What happened to having each other’s backs?” Cadence screamed.

“Uh oh. Is someone in trouble with daddy when she gets home?” Pete asked.

Cadence whirled around. “Not funny, dipshit. That’s actually really gross.”

“Totally,” Charlie agreed.

“Stop agreeing with me because you like me!”

“Hey.
You
kissed
me
, sweetheart,” Charlie said.

“And don’t
call me sweetheart!”

They all turned to look as headlights pulled into the parking lot.

“Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God,” Cadence breathed. “I’m so dead.”

She watched as Mark walked up to the park entrance and looked at the group through the locked gate.

“How’d you get in there?” he called.

“Hole in the fence around the other side,” Wesley replied.

Mark nodded. “Have fun?”

Wesley wasn’t sure how he was supposed to respond. “Uh, yeah?”

Mark rolled his eyes. “Ready to go?”

“Dude, you skate?” Pete asked.

“Yes,” Mark replied.

“Want to?”

Mark considered the offer. He needed time to think, so he figured he might as well brush up on his skateboarding skills.

“Where’s the hole?”

Five minutes later, Mark was doing kick flips. Took him a few tries to get back into the swing of things, but he realized it was like riding a bike. Once you learn, it never leaves you. He showed off a little for Cadence. He wanted her to sit there and think about all the things he planned to say to her when they were alone at home. He knew it was excruciating for her, making her wait like that. She wanted to treat the whole night like a Band-Aid. Rip that fucker right off and be done with it. Not Mark. He was gonna drag it out—make it just the slightest bit painful.

He made Cadence sit on Pete’
s lap when they got in the car. She really didn’t have much choice. The car wouldn’t seat all of them, and after Mark learned that Pete was the only one with a girlfriend, he decided his was the only suitable lap. He listened patiently to the boys’ inane yammering as he drove each one home, dropping them off one by one until it was only him and Cadence. She stayed in the backseat, too humiliated and scared to move up front. They were silent the entire drive.

“Hungry?” Mark asked as they walked through their front door.

“Yes,” she whispered.

“That’s one side effect,” he replied, pulling homemade guacamole from the fridge. He made it yesterday to go with their chicken tacos.

“I don’t need a lecture,” Cadence warned. She plopped down in a chair at the dining room table.

Mark brought her the dip and chips and pulled out his own chair.

“Wasn’t gonna give you one. Though you should probably know your brain may move a little sluggishly for the next six weeks or so.”

“Huh?”

“Research. It could take up to six weeks for the drug to leave your system. In the meantime, you may have some issues in class with short-term memory loss and difficulty comprehending the material.”

Cadence shoved a chip in her mouth, leaving guacamole at the corners of her lips.

“That’s rubbish,” she said with her mouth full.

“Is it?” He eyed her curiously. “I’ll bring you the literature tomorrow. You can read for yourself.”

“I don’t wanna read it,” she said. “I wanna sit here and eat.”

Mark nodded.
“I get it,” he said gently.

“Get what?”

“The lashing out. I get it. You’re angry with me.”

Cadence snorted. “I’m not angry with you at all. I wanted to hang with my bro and smoke some dope. That’s all that was.”

“You have guacamole all over your lips,” Mark pointed out.

“I don’t care.”

He sighed. “All right. Want something to wash that down?”

“Got any beer?
”

He smirked. “Nope, but I can make you a tall glass of ice water.”

He brought it to the table and watched her drink greedily before diving into the dip. It was nearly gone.

“You know I love you and care about you,” Mark said, watching her.

She blinked and kept eating.

“I’m not gonna give you a lecture about drugs because I know I don’t need to. You’re smarter than that.”

“Don’t pull that reverse psychology bullshit on me,” Cadence said. And then she laughed.

Mark rolled his eyes. “Well, it’s not reverse psychology, but whatever.”

“You’re appealing to my need to feel smart,” Cadence said. “You’re using it to convince me drugs are bad.” She looked at Mark through bug eyes. Where the hell did that come from? She was still high as a kite but managed to say something pretty damn intelligent. She clapped for herself.

Mark ignored her.
“I smoked weed for a long time, and it got me nowhere. I’m surprised I’m still functioning at any kind of intellectual level.”

“Then it
must not be that bad,” Cadence said.

Mark stared at her.
So this is what resentment looks like. Hard. Unyielding. Defiant. Distant.

“Okay, Cadence,” he said softly. “You want anything else to eat?”

“A pizza,” she replied.

“I’ll order a pizza.”

There was no more conversation after that.

***

Avery stared at Cadence from across the table.

“What?” Cadence snapped.

“Smoking weed with your brother and his lame ass friends?” she asked, arching her eyebrow.

“You’re gonna lecture me on eth
ics and morality?” Cadence replied.

Avery shot her a warning glance. “Yes.”

“You’re the one who turned me bad,” Cadence muttered.

“Seriously? How old are you?” Avery said.
She bit into her turkey sandwich.

“Whatever.”

Avery swallowed and continued. “I know I put you in a compromising position last year. I didn’t realize things would blow up the way they did. I just thought you’d have a regular secret boyfriend to sneak around with. How the fuck was I supposed to know you’d date your teacher?!”

Cadence propped her elbow on the table and rested her cheek in her hand while she half-listened to Avery.

“Furthermore, I didn’t realize you’d end up living with your teacher boyfriend because your dad’s a complete jerkface asshole. To top it off, I’d no idea that Mark was previously married, and that you’d be dealing with all these feelings of betrayal and resentment.”

Cadence rubbed her forehead.

“I know you’re hurting, but this is so unlike you,” Avery said gently.

“Is it?” Cadence asked. The Valentine’s Day random sex night flashed in her brain.

“Cadence, I’m not your mother—”

“Thank God.”

“—but God knows you need one right now.”

Cadence snorted.
“And I suppose you wanna take on that role?”

“Well, who else is gonna do it?”

“Are we done here?”

Avery tried a different approach. “Do you even have a clue why I sought you out last year?”

Cadence shook her head.

“I . . . I was lonely, yes. I knew what had happened with you, and I knew you were lonely, too.” Avery bit her lip and thought a moment. “I needed to be around a good person.”

Cadence furrowed her eyebrows.

“I know what I’m like,” Avery whispered. “I’m not saying I didn’t want to be sneaky and have an alibi for going to visit my boyfriend. I’m not saying that. I wanted to do all those things we did last year.”

Cadence listened intently.

“I’m just saying that I hoped maybe you’d rub off on me. Because you’re a good person with a sweet heart,” Avery explained. She paused and smiled. “You’re a sweetheart.”

Cadence grinned.

“It makes me nervous when you act like this,” Avery went on. “It’s a reflection of me, and I’m not sure I like it.”

Cadence was shocked. She watched Avery take another bite of her sandwich, like her most recent words weren’t a mind-blowing revelation.

“You’re the coolest person I know,” Cadence said. And then she giggled at how silly it sounded. Avery giggled, too.

“I know. I know it. It’s just, me doing those things is normal. You doing those things is scary. And anyway, I don’t do drugs because I’m not completely self-destructive.”

Cadence nodded.

“My vices are alcohol and sex.”

“I don’t think I really have any vices.”

“Exactly,” Avery said. “So why start now?”

Cadence chuckled as she watched Avery finish off her sandwich.

“You’ve gotta forgive him at some point, Cadence. You can’t stay angry with him forever. If you do, you two will eventually break up.”

That thought was alarming. Cadence hadn’t thought of it—that if she couldn’t find it in her heart to forgive Mark, then they wouldn’t make it as a couple. Where would she go? What would she do? He took care of her. Sure, she pulled her weight, but it wasn’t his weight. His weight was heavier.

Avery cleared her throat. “Now, who are these yahoos you’re hanging out with? ‘Cause I’m not sure I approve.”

“They’re just school friends.”

“They’re losers, Cadence, and I don’t trust them.”

“Hey! They’re my friends. Back off.”

“I don’t trust them,” Avery repeated.

“This is rich coming from you.”

“Excuse me? Are you implying that I’m not a trustworthy friend?”

“No! You’re totally trustworthy. I just mean
, in general, you’re sneaky and self-serving. You’re gonna do what’s best for you,” Cadence clarified.

“Excuse me?”

“Um, Avery? Are you serious right now?”

“You little bitch,” Avery said.
“I’ve never been selfish with you.”

Cadence burst out laugh
ing. “You took me to Gavin’s garage the day Mr. Connelly humiliated me in front of the class. You did it so you could see him. Didn’t really have anything to do with being there for me because—”

“Stop calling him Mr. Connelly!” Avery screamed.

Cadence blinked and reared back.

“Huh?”

“That’s the second time, Cadence! The second fucking time you’ve called your boyfriend by his last name! He’s not your teacher anymore! You’re dating him! You’re sleeping with him and living with him! You share a life with him! Just stop it!”

Cadence was stunned, and then her surprise turned to suspicion. She narrowed her eyes.

“Whose side are you on?” she asked warily. “Have you been talking to him?”

Avery scratched the top of her head and let out a dramatic sigh.

“I’m not taking anyone’s side on this. I think he should have told you a long time ago that he was married. You deserved to know. But you don’t deserve to be pissed off because he had a wife before you. He didn’t even know you then. And you’re punishing him because of it.”

“Fuck. You.”

“I’m right, Cadence. I see it. You’re not just hurt that he kept a secret. You’re hurt that he loved another woman and had to let her go unwillingly. Because you know that if nothing happened to her, you wouldn’t be with him. You’d mean nothing to him.”

Cadence jumped up from the table.
“Who the fuck do you think you are talking to me like that?”

“I know I’m saying things you don’t wanna hear, but you need to hear them. You’re losing it. You’re making bad choices. You’re sabotaging the best thing that’s ever happened to you—”

“Shut up!” Cadence screamed.

“You can’t look at what if’s. You have to look at what actually is. He lost his wife. She’ll always be in his heart. You have to let him have that. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you to death because he does. But you can’t keep punishing him.”

Cadence grabbed her bag and stormed off.

“Cadence, wait!” Avery called.

She whirled around and looked at her friend. They’d already attracted the attention of every student in the union, so she didn’t care what she said next.

“Don’t you dare follow me. I mean it,” she hissed. “I’ll take you to the ground if you
even fucking think about it.”

Again, the angry girl. The alter ego. She was emerging from the recesses more frequently. Taking over without permission. Cadence didn’t talk to Avery that way. But her other self did. And right now, her other self was pissed.

“I don’t wanna see you guys hurt anymore!” Avery cried.

“Go talk to Mark about it!” Cadence spit. “You’re good at that. Talking to Mark about me behind my back!”

She fled the student union before Avery could reply.

“You have the sluttiest dresses,” Cadence said as she rifled through Carrie’s closet.

“And?” her friend replied. “I only wear them to clubs. I’m not wearing them around campus.”

“I can’t do this,” Cadence said. “I’ll look ridiculous in one of these.”

“Whatever! You’ll look smokin’ hot. And I’m putting clip-in extensions in your hair, too. You’re gonna look like a Barbie doll when I’m finished.”

Cadence giggled. Wel
l, a Barbie doll sure beat the hell out of an American Girl doll.

“Are we drinking before we get there?” Cadence asked. She pulled a black strapless dress out and held it up to her.

“A little. But I’ve got fake IDs for us,” Carrie replied.

“No way!”

Carrie walked to her desk and pulled out a drawer. She held up two IDs.

“Yes, ma’am,” she said. “And I got them for free.”

“And I thought Avery was bad news,” Cadence mumbled.

Avery. She hadn’t talk to her in a week, not after the student union episode. She did sneak a peek at Mark’s cell phone when he was in the shower the other night and discovered a text thread between him and Avery. It wasn’t long. She just told him where Cadence was on two occasions and he replied with a “thanks” both times.

“Avery,” Carrie echoed. “That chick Michael and I met at lunch a while back?”

Cadence nodded.

“I don’t think she likes me very much,” Carrie said. She plugged in her curling iron and grabbed her makeup bag.

“She thinks you’re a bad influence,” Cadence replied, plopping down
on Carrie’s bed.

“Nope. Get up. You’re sitting here where the c
urling iron will reach.” Carrie stood up and offered her desk chair to Cadence. “And I
am
a bad influence.”

Cadence smiled. “It’s so ridiculous. Avery’s the one who sought m
e out last year to be ‘friends’—” She put “friends” in air quotes. “—just so that she could use me as a cover for sneaking around with her boyfriend.”

“Oooo, this I gotta hear,” Carrie said, opening her makeup bag and grabbing a brush. She swirled it in mineral foundation and applied it to Cadence’s face like she was buffing scratches out of a car.

“I went along with it because I wanted a reason to sneak out of my house, too. I told you all about my juvie stint and subsequent lockdown at home,” Cadence replied.

“Oh
, yeah. I remember.”

“Anyway, we used each other as alibis. I admit I stopped feeling guilty about it after the first few times, so I’m not suggesting I’m a better person than her or anything. I’m not judging her. She can do whatever the hell she wants to do for all I care.”

Carrie suppressed the urge to grin. Cadence was obviously pissed off, so she had a hard time taking her seriously. Mostly because Cadence was usually sweet, so this other girl appeared almost exaggerated—a caricature.

“Anyway, she’s got some nerve saying you’re a bad influence. And I don’t even know where she’s getting that. So what that I go to parti
es with you? What’s the big deal?”

Carrie swept blush on Cadence’s cheeks. “She’s just jealous. She doesn’t want you hanging out with another girl.”

“Why? That’s stupid. I can have more than one friend.”

“Not with some chicks you can’
t. They get uber jealous. Sounds like Avery is one of them.”

Cadence scowled
.

“Hey, don’t do that,” Carrie said, swiping shadow on her friend’s eyelids. “I’m totally doing this whole purple and shimmery gray thing with your eyes. It’s gonna look fantastic.”

“If you say so,” Cadence replied. She preferred to do her own makeup, but Carrie insisted. She gave in, knowing she’d wash her face and redo her entire look if she looked like a clown or whore after Carrie was finished with her.

“You’re Avery’s only friend,” Carrie went on, carefully tracing a black line over the edge of Cadence’s upper eyelid. “It’s natural she’d want you all to herself.”

“So she talks shit about you to me? That’s supposed to make me wanna only hang out with her?” Cadence asked.

“Hold up. What shit is she talking?” Carrie asked, the liner pencil poised
in her hand below Cadence’s eye.

“Well, she called you a yahoo and said you weren’t trustworthy.”

“Fucking. Twat,” Carrie replied. “First off, I don’t even know what a yahoo is. Second, what does she know about me being trustworthy or not?”

Cadence shrugged.

“Whatever,” Carrie said dismissively. She went back to work on Cadence’s eyes. “You can hang out with whoever you want. And I’m not a horrible person.”

“I don’t think you’re a horrible person,” Cadence replied.

That was true. She thought Carrie was like any other normal college girl. She went to class like she was supposed to. She studied when she needed to. She partied when she had the opportunity.

“Lots of hot guys hang out at this club we’re going to,” Carrie said.
And the subject changed just like that—something Cadence really liked about Carrie. She didn’t seem to let too many things bother her. She got “fucking twat” out of the way and then was ready to move on from discussing anything that had to do with Avery. Cadence was more than fine with that. She was ready to party tonight.

Carrie finished applying mascara
and then stood back to examine her work.

“Cadence, you could be a model,” she said after a moment.

“Really?”

“Look for yourself.”

Cadence turned to the small mirror hanging over Carrie’s desk. She studied her eyes, the way they shimmered and popped. Carrie did one hell of a job on her, and she felt beautiful—perhaps for the first time in her life. She no longer felt like the girl next door. She felt like she’d graduated to the “beautiful people” category.

“And now for the hair,” Carrie said, wiggling her eyebrows. “I’m warning you now. I’m from Texas.”

“You’re from Texas?”

“Don’t let the non-accent fool you. I wasn’t born there, but we moved to Texas when I was in middle school, and lemme tell you: I fell in love with everything big. Big eyes. Big hair. Big everything.”

“Uh oh.”

Carrie laughed. “Relax! I’m not gonna make you look ridiculous. I’m gonna make you look like a Texas beauty queen.”

“Beauty queen, huh?” Cadence glimpsed herself in the mirror once more before adding, “Bring it.”

An hour, a mega hot curling iron, and dozens of clip-in extensions later, Cadence stood in front of Carrie’s full-length mirror taking in her entire look. She decided on the black strapless mini dress to go along with the pink pumps she purchased on her shopping trip last year with Avery.

Her hair. Good Lord, her hair! Curls cascaded down her back like a waterfall. Wispy curls framed her face. The clip-ins added so much volume and thickness that she was afraid she’d collapse under their weight.

“I have big hair,” she said.

Carrie laughed. “Girl, you have hair for days. And it’s fab.”

“Can I really go out like this?” Cadence asked.

“Oh my God. After all that work I did? Uh. Yeah.”

Carrie stood with her hands on her hips sporting a blue sequins mini dress. She decided to go with straight hair tonight and flat-ironed it. Her hair was so long that it nearly reached her waist.

“Just a couple of hot chicks ready to rock it,” Carrie said.

She pulled
out a bottle of rum from under her bed and filled two plastic cups a fourth of the way. She popped a bit of Coke in each and handed one to Cadence.

“You’re a ball of nerves, I can tell,” Carrie said.

Cadence took the drink. “I’m not one for attracting attention, and I’m afraid this hair will do it.”

Carrie burst out laughing. “Relax. Attention can be good sometimes. And I think you need it right now. Well, that or a diversion. May
be they’re one and the same.”

Cadence nodded thoughtfully then sipped her drink.

“I’m glad it’ll just be us two,” Carrie said after a moment. “Michael gets on my nerves sometimes.”

Cadence
walked back to the mirror to look at her dress. She was also happy Michael wasn’t joining them. Ever since that weird hand tracing incident, she avoided him as much as possible.

“He’s annoying,
” Carrie went on.

“I thought he was your really good friend,” Cadence said, fingering the ruched fabric hugging her waist.

“Yeah, he is, but then, that’s why he’s annoying,” Carried explained, watching her.

Cadence chuckled. “You get close enough to a person, and it’s bound to happen.”

“Ugh. Tell me about it. That’s why I’m always looking for new friends to hang with.”

Cadence turned around and cocked her head. “So you’ll eventually find me annoying and dump me as a friend?”

“Naturally,” Carrie replied, and the girls giggled. “Let’s make a rule to only see each other, like, once a week or something. Then maybe we’ll actually stay friends.”

“Deal,” Cadence said and finished off her rum and Coke.

“Another?”

“No way. That’s the right amount for me,” Cadence replied.
Already she felt the low-burning embers in her chest, warming her body and making her face flush.

“Tha
t was like nothing,” Carrie argued.

“Don’t pressure me.”

Carrie grinned. “You’re such a good girl.”

“No! No
, I’m not,” Cadence said. She wasn’t good at all. She was a bitch. She hated her best friend at the moment. She hated her boyfriend and communicated with him as little as possible. She hated herself, her black heart and mind that conjured black images of hurting the ones she was supposed to love. She wanted to bury Mark under his lies. She wanted to bury Avery under her own anger and jealousy. She wasn’t growing older and wiser. She was moving backwards because of hurt she couldn’t rectify.

“What are you thinking?” Carrie asked. She’d been watching her friend the whole time.

“I’m thinking that I’m ready to dance,” Cadence replied.

“Then let’s get to it
.”

The club was crowded with gorgeous people—women competin
g to be the most provocative on the dance floor. Men competing to get closest to them. Carrie and Cadence danced all night, attracting dance partners who weren’t shy about putting their hands on places they shouldn’t. Cadence never protested. She realized she liked the attention and wanted it to follow her to the bar for another free drink.

The girls actually found a spac
e at the end with two empty stools. They claimed them for the rest of the evening, chatting and laughing about Carrie’s failed dates and her inability to attract the right guys. The conversation eventually turned to Mark, and Cadence spilled her guts about his marriage. Carrie listened intently, ordering more drinks, consoling Cadence who looked like she was on the verge of tears.

“Your boyfriend shouldn’t have kept that secret,” Carrie said softly. She leaned in and hugged Cadence. Then she kissed her lightly on the cheek. Then h
er lips steered to Cadence’s mouth, kissing her lightly there, too.

Cadence reared back. She watched Carrie’s lips curl into a gri
n. And then Carrie reached over the bar for a lime wedge. The bartender didn’t stop her; he was curious to see what she planned to do with it. He didn’t think she meant to simply drop it in her cocktail.

Cadence stared
, fascinated as Carrie stuck out her tongue slightly and squeezed the lime. She swallowed and licked her lips, then repeated the process all over. A bit of juice dribbled down her chin the second time, and Cadence reached out automatically, tracing her thumb over the sticky trail, wiping it away. It seemed natural to lick the juice off her thumb, so she did, and she watched Carrie while she did it.

Carrie smiled and leaned in, centimeters from Cadence’s face.

“This won’t hurt a bit,” she cooed, and Cadence nodded.

She pressed her
tarty lips to Cadence’s. A gentle kiss. She was testing her out, seeing how far she could take it with a girl so innocent. She teased open Cadence’s mouth, and Cadence tasted the lime juice on her tongue—the most delicious and naughty kiss she’d ever had. They mingled their tongues, moaning softly into each other’s mouths as curious onlookers moved in closer. Cadence didn’t notice them. She was too busy trying to taste every bit of fruit on her friend’s lips. She couldn’t get enough.