Betrayal 2012 (21 page)

Even with people constantly telling me that he was going to leave again, I still wanted to believe that we could overcome the odds.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked from his spot next to the bed.  I looked up at him in surprise and he chuckled.  “I can see your pinched brow from here.”

I decided not to ruin this moment.  “Nothing really.  Just that you’ve never been in my bedroom before.”

He looked around and then pushed on the mattress a few times.  “It’s nicer than our efficiency in Maryland.”

“Yeah, but I loved that place.”

“So did I.”  He held out his arm and I walked close enough to lay my hand in his.  “I really think this is where I need to be.”

“What?”

“Seattle never felt right.  Being here with you is better.” 
Better?
  That stung a little bit but I was determined to make the most of tonight and prove to Brendan that this was our home now.  So I raised my head and gave him a kiss.  He responded quickly and all feelings of doubt disappeared.  I remembered every part of him and the way he moved.  Being with him was just plain
right
.

He pulled away and licked his lips.  “You taste salty.”

With a sudden pang of embarrassment, I realized that I hadn’t showered since I left Jeremiah’s nearly a full day ago.  I stepped away and walked towards my bathroom.  “I’m going to get cleaned up.”

Brendan laughed and shook his head.  “That’s not what I meant.”

“I know, but it’s been a really long day and I could use a shower.”  I made my way into the bathroom, but before I closed the door I stuck my head back into the bedroom.  “Don’t go anywhere, okay?”

He was sprawled out across the foot of my bed.  “I won’t.  Promise.” 

I smiled at that and shut the door.  Why was I so nervous?  It’s not like we hadn’t done this before.  I mean we lived together for almost a month.  It just seemed like things were different now.  More fragile.  Like one wrong move on my part would send him running again.

Sighing, I turned on the shower and stripped out of my clothes.  Why was I feeling this way?  The man I loved more than anyone else in the world was just beyond that door, willing to try at our relationship again.  This nagging feeling of dread inside of me had to go away.  I stepped underneath the hot water and closed my eyes, forcing myself to breathe deeply and ignore those negative feelings.

I was just about to grab the shampoo when I heard the door click open.  My breath caught in my throat and I froze.  The shower curtain rustled as it was pushed to the side and Brendan stepped into the tub with me.  My back was facing him but I knew what I’d see if I turned around.  And I could barely stop myself. 

Brendan grabbed the shampoo from my hands.  “Here, let me do it.”  The moment he began to massage the shampoo into my scalp was the moment the last of the fear slipped away.  Showers together had become an almost daily event in Maryland.  It was as though we could never quite get enough of each other.  I closed my eyes in part due to the bliss of feeling him so close to me and also to stop the impending tears from spilling over.

When he finished with my hair, he began to massage my neck and shoulders.  It was so relaxing that I needed to brace myself against the side of the shower.  He laughed and leaned forward close enough to whisper in my ear and brush up against me.  “Perhaps we should finish up in here and go to bed.”

I turned around so that I could see his perfect face and beautiful body.  Any childish feelings that I may have had for Graham had just been that…childish.  This was real.  Brendan was real and he was here.

We stayed in the shower long enough to use up all of the hot water before moving into the bedroom.  Everything was perfect.  It was as though we hadn’t lost all of that time or that our lives had drastically changed since that day in the cave.  Brendan had owned my heart for so many years and now I couldn’t give him enough of me.  I closed my eyes and wished that we could freeze these moments in time.  Like the moment when we were wrapped around each other so tight that nothing could ever break us apart again.  Or the one right now, where we were laying in each other’s arms, content and at peace.

I rubbed my hand over his chest.  “I’m glad you’re back.”  I felt him tense slightly, but then he chuckled.  Reaching up with his left hand he grabbed mine and pulled it to his mouth for a kiss.

“Me too,” he whispered.

“What’s going to happen now?” As much as I really didn’t want to have this conversation, I needed to know.

He took a deep breath and tilted his head down to look into my eyes.  “We’ll just take it one day at a time for now, okay?”  I nodded and smiled up at him, unable to speak.  “Close your eyes and get some sleep.”  I nestled closer against his chest, fearful that if I wasn’t touching him, he would disappear. 

Something in the middle of the night briefly woke me up.  Brendan was fidgeting beside me and through my sleepy haze, I saw him staring up at the ceiling.  “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.  Just go back to sleep.”  The gravity of the past few days had weighed me down and before I could ask any more questions, I fell back into a deep sleep.

Rays of sun skittered through my window and I groaned at the site.  I was so tired but the smell of fresh coffee wafting up from the kitchen did me in.  Opening my eyes, I suddenly remembered that last night had not been a dream and that Brendan really had been here with me.

I sat up in the bed and turned to look for him.  My heart plummeted when I saw that he wasn’t lying next to me.  The bathroom door was opened and he wasn’t in there. 
Relax Eviana.  He’s probably just downstairs
.

I hurriedly threw on a sundress and wrapped my hair up into a knot.  Finishing with my teeth, I’d managed to get out of bed in record time.  I bounded down the stairs and tried to force myself to walk calmly into the kitchen.  It was packed full of people…well, mermaids and selkies anyway.  Looking around, I could see that Jason and Palmer were busy cooking breakfast while one of the visiting selkies poured coffee and juice for everyone.  It was like one giant unorthodox family gathering.

“Hey Eviana!” Daniel shouted from his seat at the counter.  Sitting next to him was a tall but lanky blonde boy with sharp cheekbones and a chiseled jaw.  That must have been Aleksey.  I walked towards them.

“Hi Daniel.  Did you sleep well?”

Both of the boys blushed and I almost died.  I didn’t really want to know, it was just a polite question.  “Yes.  Thank you.” 

My sister suddenly caught my attention.  She was sitting at the table next to the young man I assumed was Quinlan.  His bright red hair was a sharp contrast to her dark brown mane, but his cute face and numerous freckles made him irresistible.  I could see why she was attracted to him.  They were both bending over giggling and I watched them flirt openly with each other.  Even though I thought that she was too young, I had to smile.  This was the first time in a long time I saw her truly enjoying herself. 

Daniel cleared his throat.  “So how was your night?”  He totally knew.

“Fine.”

“Mmm hmm,” he mumbled in his trademark way.  I slapped his arm.  “You’re beaming, Eviana.”  I guess that I was, although right now, I just wanted to see Brendan.

“Have you seen him?” I asked.  Daniel shook his head.

“No, but we just got here a few minutes before you.”  He looked around the room and jerked his chin. “Maybe Julian knows.”

I followed his gaze to see the leader of the selkies standing with his arms crossed and leaning up against the doors that led to the deck.  His dark hair and tall, tanned body was still in impeccable shape even though he must have been in his mid-forties.  He was staring at me with sad green eyes and something about his look sent my stomach into a downward spiral.  When he motioned for me to join him, I almost collapsed.

“What’s wrong?” Daniel asked.

I shrugged my shoulders and silently followed Julian out the sliding glass doors and towards the farthest corner of the deck.  My body was trembling in anticipation like it knew something bad was coming.  While everyone had been enjoying their morning, Julian looked miserable.  My heart climbed into my throat as I forced myself to ask the question.

“Do you know where Brendan is?”  Silence.  I almost thought that he wasn’t going to answer me, but finally he nodded.

“Yes, I do.”  More silence followed and I wanted to shake him.

“Well, will you tell me where?  I need to talk to him.”  The sinking feeling in my gut was growing but I tried to maintain my composure.  Julian sighed.

“He’s gone back to our house,” he turned and looked down at me, “to pack his bags.”  I immediately let out the breath I’d been holding.

“Good.  So he decided to move in here.”  I smiled and leaned over the railing to glance down the beach, hoping to see him walk this way.  He was coming back for good.

Julian laid his hand on top of mine.  “Eviana…”  Suddenly a train slammed into my chest.  I could hear it in his tone before he spoke the words.  “Brendan’s not moving in with you.”

Yanking my arm away, I stepped back and nearly tripped over myself.  “What do you mean?”

Julian ran his hands through his dark, curly hair and looked up at the sky.  “He found me early this morning and we had a long talk.”  When he didn’t continue I raised my eyebrows telling him to go on.  “He’s been feeling the call for several weeks, but I think that he was afraid to admit it to himself.”

I almost fell to the ground. 
The call?
No, it couldn’t be.  “What are you talking about, Julian?” I snapped.

“It started in Seattle.  Not long after we arrived.”  He began to pace along the deck.  “At first I thought he was just missing you.  But then I could see it in his mind.”

“What?” I gasped.

He rolled his head seemingly trying to release some of the tension.  “I’m sort of…telepathically connected to all of these selkies.”   He waited for me to comment and when I didn’t, he continued.  “That’s why I have the persuasion I do.  They kind of see me like an alpha.”

“Brendan told me about that.”

“Good.  Then you understand.”  He stopped walking and stood right in front of me.  “I’ve felt the pull through other selkie’s minds.  I’ve been there myself so I knew that’s what Brendan was experiencing.”

The only way for me not to cry was to get angry.  “So why did he come here then?  Why did he spend last night with me?”

Julian winced.  “He should not have done either of those things and I told his as much.  But he wanted you to be enough.”  I snorted and glared at him.  “What I mean is that he wanted his life with you to be enough to overpower the call.  He loves you very much, Eviana.”

I stepped away from him again.  “Well, obviously he doesn’t or he wouldn’t keep hurting me over and over!”  My chest tightened and my throat clamped shut.  I was trying so hard not to cry.

Julian’s green eyes glistened with tears, too.  “I am sorry that this is happening to the two of you but…”

“You told me it would,” I snapped.  He nodded and I repressed every urge in my body to punch him.  This wasn’t Julian’s fault.  He just had the misfortune of being the messenger.  I started to move towards the deck stairs.  “I’m going to go see him.”

Julian grabbed my arm and pulled me back.  “You can’t,”

“Get your hands off of me,” I screamed through gritted teeth.  He obliged, but the fight was slowly seeping from my body as despair began to take over.

“You can’t see him because he’s already gone.”

“What?  You said that he was packing?”

“He was.  But I’m sure that he’s gone by now.”  Julian looked at me with so much pity in his eyes.  I didn’t need someone feeling sorry for me.  I needed to talk to Brendan.  I turned to walk to their house again.  “Eviana!  He left this for you.”