Behind a Lady's Smile (21 page)

“I’m sorry, darlin’. I tried to go slow. I tried.” Then he started moving slowly, in and out, in a way that she understood. “Wrap your legs around me. Oh, Jesus.” He kissed her breasts, her mouth, her neck, thrusting, filling her. The burning sensation was replaced by another, far better one, and Genny started moving with him, trying to again reach that peak that had made her cry out. His thrusts became frantic, faster, right before he arched his back and let out a hoarse cry.

He rested his head next to hers, his breathing labored, his heart beating wildly. “I can’t wait to get married,” he said, laughing out loud.

“Is this what married people do all the time?”

“It’s what we’re going to do all the time.” He kissed her before slowly withdrawing from her. It was so odd; she hadn’t realized how much he’d filled her until he pulled away. “Are you all right? Did it hurt too much?”

“Just a bit,” she said. “And then it started to feel good again.”

“It’s only the first time, you know. It won’t hurt again.”

“That’s good. It really was lovely, Mitch.”

“It really was.”

 

Mitch was drifting off to sleep, lulled by the movement of the ship and the best love-making he’d ever experienced, when a loud knock sounded on the door to Genny’s stateroom.

“Shit. Tillie.”

The two of them scrambled as best they could to dress, though any thought of having Genny climb back into her gown was immediately dismissed. Genny ran for the small wardrobe and pulled out a nightgown, slipping it over her head in a frenzy of movement, as if the cotton gown were attacking her. Mitch would have laughed if he hadn’t been so busying looking for his shirt.

“Miss Hayes,” Tillie called out. “Are you all right? Should I get the steward?”

Before Tillie could do anything as foolish as that, Mitch flung open the door. The look on Tillie’s face was priceless. In a matter of seconds, it was clear she had accurately assessed the situation and it was just as clear she was livid.

“You
bounder
,” she said, coming into the room, poking his chest with surprising strength. Damn, that hurt. “How could you, you snake. I trusted you.
Genny
trusted you.”

“Hold on a minute, Tillie, we’re getting married.”

Tillie looked at Genny, who stood like a frightened deer staring down the barrel of a rifle.

“We are,” Genny said.

Tillie crossed her arms. “Oh? Really? And where is the ring?”

“This wasn’t exactly planned,” Mitch said.

“I’ll bet it wasn’t. Are you all right?” Tillie said, rushing over to Genny to embrace her, then turning as if Mitch would pounce on Genny and have his way with her again.

“I’m perfectly splendid, Tillie. We’re engaged.”

Tillie snorted, and Mitch felt his temper start to slide. He took a deep breath. “Listen, Tillie, I know you’re upset, but please know I only have Genny’s best interests at heart.”

Another snort. “So, you’re going to live in a palace with her and her grandparents.”

Mitch was taken aback. He hadn’t really thought that far ahead. “I expect we’ll head back home and live in New York.”

“And make her give up on everything she’s entitled to? That’s having her best interests at heart?”

Mitch felt his cheeks flush. “We really haven’t had time to discuss the future beyond the fact we are getting married.” He pointed a finger at Tillie. “And if you snort again I’m going to plug your nose.”

Obviously, that was the wrong thing to say. Tillie, her dander already up so high it was likely floating above her head, stood up and marched over to him. Then she snorted like a bull in heat.

“Tillie, look,” Genny said, holding up the watch Mitch had left on the small side table near the bed. “He loves me.” Tillie looked at the opened watch, her expression softening slightly when she saw his watch case held the portrait of Genny he’d taken.

Tillie harrumphed, which was better than a snort, Mitch supposed. He was a bit embarrassed that she’d seen the picture and would no doubt recall the many instances when he’d pretended to be checking the time. He held out his hand and Genny gave him his watch with a cheeky little grin. Mitch knew when to leave best alone, so he looked past Tillie to where Genny stood, a smile still tugging at her lovely mouth. He wanted to go over and kiss her silly, but thought better of it when Tillie stepped into his line of vision. “I’ll see you in the morning, darlin’.”

“Bye, Mitch. I love you.”

“I love you too,” he managed to get out just before Tillie pushed him out the door and slammed it shut.

A sharply cold blast of air hit Mitch as he stepped out on the deck into a gray early morning. The seas were almost eerily calm after the storm the previous evening, and Mitch took a deep breath of salt-tinged air. He went to the railing, bracing himself against it, and looked out, letting the peace of the sea wash over him. She wasn’t leaving him. Every morning for the rest of his life, he would look over and see her smiling sleepily at him, and he’d be able to draw her into his arms. If he wasn’t the luckiest man on earth, he didn’t know who was.

Mitch, his steps lighter than they’d been in years, went down to third class, not even bothered by the sight of a rat slinking away in the gloom. He quietly entered his room and sat on his lower bunk, waking one of his bunkmates, a large Irish fellow named Ross McFadden who was visiting his family after being away for six long years.

“And where might you have been all night?” Ross asked, turning on his side to face Mitch. The two had become chums of a sort since the trip began, mostly because the other two men couldn’t speak much English. “These two,” he said, “had a rough night. Sorry for the stink.”

Mitch lay down on his bunk and flung his hands beneath his head, grinning like a fool. “I’m getting married,” he said.

“You don’t say,” Ross said, sounding as if such a thing were a commonplace announcement. “And who is the lucky lady? Don’t tell me it’s that girl you’ve been mooning after, the one in the fancy dress.”

Mitch frowned a bit, but refused to let the Irishman’s doubt lower his mood. “It is. She’s not what she seems.”

Ross let out a sound that reminded Mitch of the snorts Tillie had been emitting with such regularity. “All right. Who is she, then? Or didn’t you notice that you’re here in third class and she’s got a stateroom up top?”

“I noticed because I’m the one who paid for her room,” Mitch said good-naturedly. “It’s a long story and one I’m not inclined to go into right now. Just say congratulations and stop talking.”

Ross sat up. “This sounds like the kind of yarn my daddo used to tell. Let me guess. You’re the knight in shining armor, disguised as a poor slob, and she’s a princess who doesn’t realize she’s a princess until the knight rescues her.”

Mitch chuckled. “It actually is something like that.”

“Won’t end well.”

“It already has ended well. We’re getting married.”

“I’ll tell you what, boyo, I’ll give you that happy ending when I see her walk down the aisle holding a bunch of pretty flowers and you’re there waiting at the other end. Until then, you ain’t got a happy ending.”

Mitch’s mood could not be lowered by one skeptical Irishman. “I’m going to try to get some sleep.”

“You’re askin’ for trouble, my friend. If she likes pretty things and pretty dresses, you’re either going to be a very poor man trying to look rich or a middling poor man with a very unhappy wife.”

“Shut up,” Mitch said lightly, but the truth was, that last did bother him a bit. Genny
did
like the beautiful dresses he’d purchased for her. Who wouldn’t like the latest fashions and traveling in first class? On their trip home, there would be no stateroom for them unless her grandparents gave him a sizeable reward. And would they reward him at all when he was going to be taking her away from them soon after they’d been reunited?

Hell
. He hadn’t thought of that. He was very nearly broke. He hadn’t considered paying the return passage for two of them, only himself and Tillie. He’d thought they would stay at a nice hotel when arriving in London, but he’d have to look for far lower accommodations. Though the ship had rooms for married couples, they were tiny and windowless, a far step down from the luxury of Genny’s current stateroom.

“She’s used to being poor,” Mitch said into the silence. That was true. She’d been starving when he’d found her. Surely she wasn’t a woman who would resent being poor after such a brief stint of living as if she weren’t. He smiled in the darkness. Genny wouldn’t give a fig.

“Mebbe you’re right. But I’ll tell you somethin’. Once you get a taste of how the other half lives, it’s awfully hard to go back. You think I’d like to live in the hovel I grew up in? In New Jersey, I’ve got myself my own farm, my own house. It’s mine. I got fifty dairy cows. Fifty.”

“Then why are you in third class?”

“Because I worked damned hard for every penny I have and I sure as hell ain’t going to waste a dime of it for some fancy bed. This is just fine. But would I live in a shack again, eatin’ rotten potatoes and bowin’ down to some landlord? The hell I would.”

Mitch pictured Genny back in the tiny cabin she’d been living in and smiled. Genny would be happy there. She’d be happy wherever the two of them were together. He was as sure of that as he was sure he loved her.

 

“You want to live in my old cabin?” Genny asked, slightly dismayed. They were standing on the deck watching as the land they’d been following for so many days began to slip out of sight until it was only a dark smudge on the horizon. When she’d seen Mitch standing at the railing looking so handsome, the wind buffeting his wavy brown hair, she couldn’t help but hug herself in pure joy. This man, this beautiful, wonderful, kind man was going to be her husband. She truly didn’t care where they lived as long as they were together. But her cabin? Why on earth would he want to go back there?

“I thought you loved your cabin.” He seemed surprised by her reaction, as if he’d forgotten how lonely the cabin was, how isolated. She would always think fondly of the time she’d lived there with her father—it was home—but she’d nearly starved to death. And she and her father had had more than one lean winter when they’d been only a few empty traps away from not eating. She would never wish those years away, but she would also never want to go back to them. Perhaps Mitch thought she missed it?

“I do love my cabin, but I also love eating a meal without having to hunt or trap it.” She let out a small laugh. “Did you have your heart set on returning?” Genny tried to keep the dismay out of her voice. “I thought you planned to open a photography studio in New York.”

Her response seemed to bother him, though she didn’t know why. More than once Mitch had talked about his dream of opening his own photography studio. He’d never once talked about giving up that dream to live in the wilderness.

“It was only a suggestion. We have to live somewhere when we get back.”

“I hadn’t really given the future a thought beyond our wedding,” she said. Mitch let out a gusty breath, and Genny noticed his hands clenched tightly on the rail, his knuckles gone white. “Mitch, what’s wrong?”

“I don’t have any money, Genny. Other than a few hundred dollars in my bank back in New York, all I have is what’s in my pocket and that’s hardly enough to get us back to the States, never mind rent a studio and set up a business. I’m broke.”

“Oh.”

“So I can’t open my studio and I can’t buy you a house or even rent a nice place.” He snapped his head around to look at her and swallowed, looking sick.

“I don’t need a nice place or all these silly clothes. Is that what this is all about?” And then she realized something horrible and felt a rush of hot shame for being so utterly blind. She was traveling in first class with a maid. She was wearing clothes that she knew were expensive. Mitch hadn’t batted an eye. She hadn’t had any idea how much all those luxuries had cost, and to her dawning horror, she hadn’t even thought of it beyond feeling grateful. She’d figure if it was too much, Mitch would have simply refused. Goodness, he’d grumbled about paying two dollars for a room back in San Diego.

“Why didn’t you tell me? Why did you spend all your money on these clothes, my stateroom, when you didn’t have it to spare?” She stared at him but he remained silent. “And this entire time you believed you were going to just drop me off and say good-bye. Why would you do that?”

He looked back out to sea. “I couldn’t stand the thought of you standing there outside your grandparents’ mansion and having some butler look at you as if you were anything less than what you are. It drove me crazy thinking you’d be hurt. You know that. That’s why we got the clothes, taught you to dance.”

“To save my pride,” she said, feeling the knot in her stomach grow. “Oh, I’m such a selfish, horrible person. None of this mattered two months ago. None of these things.”

“But you like them.”

“Of course I do. Who wouldn’t? But I don’t need them, Mitch. You spent all that money, you gave up your dream. For me. I’m not worthy of such sacrifice.”

Mitch turned to her and gripped her upper arms. “You are worthy of it.” He dropped his hands as another passenger walked by, giving them a curious look. Genny nodded and smiled, silently reassuring the older man that she was fine. “I’m no saint, Genny, so don’t paint me as one. I’m just a man who fell in love with the wrong woman.” He swiped a hand through his hair. “That’s not quite what I meant. I don’t think you fully understand the sacrifice you’ll be making when you marry me. I know you said yes, but I want you to realize you can change your mind.”

She placed her hands on his lapels and gave him a little tug, not caring who might see. “Never.”

“Now hear me out. You have to understand what you’re giving up. I want you to take a good hard look at the life you would have been leading if last night had never happened. I’m the selfish one here, Genny. I’m the one who’s asking you to give up the kind of life most people dream of. To be with me. A dead broke, second-rate photographer.”