Because You Want Me (Falling for You, Book One) (7 page)

I ignored it, a crazy idea taking root. “Have you ever been on a helicopter?”

“What?” Her face twisted in confusion. “I mean, um, no?” She bit her bottom lip to hide her smile but it just made her shine brighter as she took a cautious step forward. “Why do you ask?”

I reached for my phone, punching Caitlyn's number. “Because we're going on a field trip.”

D
o not sleep with Xander Wade.

I'd been repeating that sentence in my head from the minute he held out his hand and led me to the elevators that shot us to the roof. He never let my hand go, even squeezing it as we shared a view of Golden Gate Bridge that I'd only seen in movies. It was almost as alluring as the sight of our hands locked together so effortlessly that I almost believed it was real. The nearness of him mixed with the adrenaline of being thousands of feet above the rest of the world and it made me want to be reckless. Something like...ease our hands up my thigh and decide that maybe I'd behaved too rashly when I'd made the proclamation that if we were doing this, it would be a business arrangement, with no sex.

But I wanted him.

I needed him.

And it was driving me utterly insane.

It didn't help that he kept stroking my skin-slow, tender circles that made me want to kiss him. Despite the rumbling of the jets and my ongoing battle to keep my legs closed, every jolt that rocked through me made me wish I'd worn a skirt.

When I saw the familiar hills of the Tri-Valley, I panicked for a moment, thinking that in his over the top manner, he was taking me back to my apartment, but the copter set down in Livermore. When a woman dressed in all black with dollar signs glittering in her eyes rushed over, welcoming us to Brentwood Winery, I had to repeat the words again.

Do not sleep with Xander Wade.

Do...

Ugh.

This was like some fantastic, surreal dream and people do really dumb things in their dreams. Helicopter rides to wineries, his hand caressing mine the entire journey with no intention of letting up—I could see me wavering. I felt it every time I pretended I didn't notice him watching me. I had no idea what he saw, or why he was going to all this trouble when he was already paying me, but I didn't have the guts to ask. I didn't want to know. I didn't want to risk doing anything that would wake me from this dream.

“You okay?”

His voice shook me from my stupor and I looked down, my heart lurching when I saw our fingers were still interlaced.

I snatched my hand away, wiping my sweaty palms on my pants. “I, um, sorry.” I expected him to do the same. Nerves had me sweating like I was standing in front of my class for the first time, wondering how I could instill confidence and self worth in my students when I was still working on that myself. He didn't make a face and follow suit, instead, holding out a hand as he angled toward the entrance of the restaurant.

I hadn't hesitated when he reached for me before, willingly letting him pull me even deeper into dangerous territory, a place where reality and fantasy bled into each other.

“Let me get my bearings,” I said with a forced huff of annoyance, turning my back to him. I squeezed my eyes shut and sucked air into my lungs and blew it out before I opened them and made use of the moment to catch my breath.

Our bubbly guide cleared her throat and I frowned, but my smile was back in place when I turned. The winery was beautiful, from the wood beams to the rustic barrels and string lights that lined the way toward a set of French doors.

I glanced down at my wrist, surprised that the place wasn't bustling with energy for the early dinner crowd, people scrambling for wine and food after a long day at the office. “Are we early?”

She paused, pirouetting back to face me. Her name, Margery, was etched in cursive on a bronze name tag. “Early?”

“The place just seems-” Just in case it was a sore subject, I chose my words carefully. “A little slow.”

Her crystal eyes flicked over to Xander, then back to me. “Mr. Wade booked the entire property for the rest of the evening.”

My stomach dropped. “He did what?!”

Xander turned his charm on Margery. “I think we've got it from here. Everything's set up for us on the patio?”

“Yes sir,” Margery chirped. “And if you need anything else-”

“Absolutely.” He dismissed her with a grin and tried to turn it on me, but I crossed my arms.

I waited until she was out of earshot. “You reserved a winery for us?”

His smile wavered. “Yes. Is it too much?”

I glanced around us, all the candles burning suddenly making me sweat in a significantly unsexy way. I didn't need a mirror to know that the little makeup I'd thrown on this morning had melted off my face, my braid hung limp, the whole right side of my hair giving up altogether, and just spilling down my back. My white blouse was wrinkled, the cotton stuck to my sticky skin. The only thing that looked appropriate for this expensive last minute date were my pants.

Going to his office was already like some alien world, being here just reminded me of how we lived in different worlds.

“Yes,” I said finally, unbraiding the rest of my hair. I twisted it into a bun, wrapping a hair tie around the mess. “It's too much.” When his jaw tightened, I was the one that reached for his hand, wanting to explain myself. “Don't get me wrong, it's pretty much the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me.” My words got stuck in my throat. I told him I was overwhelmed, that I wanted to escape, and he hadn't batted an eye before he scooped me up on his white horse and saved the day. “You're pretty much the best f-”

His finger pressed against my lips. Who knew that being shushed could be so hot? Every part of my body snapped to life, my eyes lost in his as he inched closer to me, his finger teasing downward until it rested on my bottom lip.

“I have some new rules to add to the list. No more fake boyfriend/girlfriend talk. Or how this isn't real.” He brought his other hand to my face, holding me steady with his touch and his gaze. “You're mine, and I'm yours.”

I drew my hands up, resting my palms against his chest. If I was smart, I'd push him backwards and tell him to take me back to the city. Instead, I gripped the front of his shirt and yanked him forward. I locked my arms around his waist, my face nuzzled against him. I uttered a word of surrender. “Okay.”

I didn't let myself think about what I'd lose when the month was up or how I would reconcile taking a check from him when this arrangement ended. I just let him hold me. I savored the care I felt when he reared back slightly and tucked my hair behind my ears and sealed my fate with a kiss.

He guided me toward the French doors, a table a few inches from the ground topped with wine, glasses, and an assortment of fruit and cheeses that looked similar to the spread we'd left untouched back in his office. The patio looked out on the property, rows of oak trees stretching out before us, nestled among the golden hills.

I whipped back to face him, ready to admit that this was fantastic and I was grateful—and I saw the same look I'd seen when we first met. His eyes were ravenous, downright sinful...and my body responded in kind. The warmth begun between my thighs and radiated outward. This wasn't just the sun on my back, a flicker of lust. I was on fire for him, all the reservations, and rule number one was called into question.

“No sex.” It came out hoarsely. There was no bite in the words, because my eyes focused on his mouth and I longed for a different kind of bite—his teeth, wrapped around the nipples that strained against my bra.

He advanced, his gaze nailing me to the ground. I saw the untamed lust in his gaze and I decided that I wouldn't run. I wanted him to eat me alive. Or at least eat...certain parts of me.

Heat stormed my cheeks, the thoughts running rampant in my head unlike anything I'd ever experienced before. I was used to losing myself in the moment, but I wanted to feel everything with Xander. I wanted to savor every second.

Faint music purred from the dining room and-

Dining room.

I blinked, the world coming back to focus. We were on the patio, in full view of God knows who, and I was two seconds away from tearing off my blouse.

He was still advancing, the look in his eyes making the heat in my cheeks intensify and the wetness between my thighs was rebelling against my sense of public decency.

He backed me up against the railing and I held out a hand to keep him at a distance. “What do you think you're doing?”

“I'm going to lay you down on that cushion, spread your legs apart, and bury my mouth inside you.”

My mouth hung open in a mixture of shock and arousal. “You..but...the rule...”

His smile deepened mischievously. “I know you're used to being in charge and enforcing rules, but some rules are meant to be-” He reached out and gripped my belt, jerking it loose. “Tested.”

My head spun as I tried to muster the energy to push him back, but I had none left. The desire that had been edging up on my sense of self preservation all day hushed everything but his touch. “Xander...”

He held steady, fingers wrapped around the button, eyes capturing mine. “Say it again.”

I frowned, then gasped when he  slipped the button through the hole. He was doing exactly what he said he would.

Taking off my pants and then he'd—

I melted into his embrace. I didn't care who saw, I didn't care about anything except his body and my body.

I'd never wanted anything as badly as I wanted him.

“Say my name again.”

I drew a shuddering breath and his need, my need, filled my lungs. I licked my lips, trembling as I felt his eyes follow my tongue's path, then he leaned in and retraced my steps with his own.

“Xander.”

I moaned his name with abandon and threw my arms around his neck, tugging at tuffs of his hair as he tore down my pants. My panties were next and I scrambled to discard them, the cotton thing flung to the side.

Screw the warmth of embarrassment of being watched. I felt the warmth of the sun on my butt—and I didn't even care because his fingers skated down to grip the round curve of my ass and he lifted me up like I didn't weigh a thing.

He caught his breath, his kiss swollen lips quivering as his eyes burned into mine. “Tell me you want this.” There was a hesitation swirling in the emerald warmth of his gaze. He was giving me a chance to walk away. To stand my ground about the rule that once seemed like a life raft and now was just pulling me down. The rule was drowning the intensity of this moment.

Fuck the rule.

My hair spilled into my eyes and I whipped it back. I didn't want to hide. I wanted him to hear and see my desire.

“I want this.” I kissed him hard, taking his bottom lip between my teeth and tugging until he groaned his approval. I let go and the words dripped like honey. “I want you.”

He took us to the floor, the cushions catching our bodies. I expected his hands to drop to his fly, but his hands returned to me, fingertips stroking up my calves and rounding my knees. He tore open my thighs and a gasp stole away from my lips. There was an urgency that radiated from him that made me bloom. This muscled, delicious, holy crap sexy guy couldn't wait one more moment to have me.
Me.

His fingertips brushed my inner thigh and goosebumps ran wild, dialing every pore in my body up to hyper sensitive. I'd never been touched the way Xander touched me. Like I was meant to be his. Like this was the realest thing he'd ever known.

I was propped on my elbows, watching him gaze at my body like it was nirvana, right within reach. I'd never been so close to climax without being touched. When he disappeared, only the crown of his head visible, the warmth of his breath on me turned me inside out. He was just breathing, gusts of air caressing my skin and I was already panting and thrusting my hips.

He moaned against my skin, lips dancing across the seam to my core. I fell backwards in ecstasy, everything but his mouth fading to black. His tongue roamed inside me, tasting my need. Suckling my desire.

When I came I shook like I was falling apart and somehow, some way, it wasn't terrifying. No one had touched me in months, but when I blinked through the haze of lust I realized I was wrong. No one had touched me the way he touched me...ever.

“N
o helicopter ride to meet your parents?” Her sweetheart mouth dipped with feigned disappointment. “That changes everything.”

I swatted her ass playfully and the gasp, followed by the reddening of her cheeks as she tossed me a scolding glare, was almost enough to calm the apprehension that scrambled to my throat. The silence invaded the memories of an afternoon that morphed from business as usual to Penny—Penny's hand in mine, Penny's smile no longer hesitant, Penny letting go...letting me take us to the place we both longed to go.

And now we were headed to meet my parents.

That fact alone should have been enough to make me dig in my heels and catch a breath. This whiplash romance had my head spinning. But the sinking in the pit of my stomach had nothing to do with the gravity of introducing her to my parents. I was battening down the hatches because even though I still tasted her on my tongue, still heard her moans swirling in my ears, there was no escaping the fact that even though being with her felt as close to real that I'd been in a long time, the fact remained that I'd only met her because my father was forcing my hand. I was paying her a great sum of money to heed his wishes and it turned what should have been anxiety inducing for romantic reasons to anxiety inducing because this was an arrangement.

Just don’t think about the end. Enjoy the ride. Enjoy her and this thing, whatever it is.

For all my talk about letting go, living in the moment, and enjoying what Penny and I had, I’d been fooling myself. I saw her pop the grapes in her mouth like a bitter pill she had to swallow, eyes swimming with emotion she refused to own up to and I made a choice. I wanted to make her smile, do something gallant, and a little absurd. I wanted to show her a life that I often took for granted; I had a helicopter, private jet, and a fleet of cars to take me anywhere in the world. When she glided to the window and looked out at the city with awe, like she was moments away from pinching herself and waking from this dream, I knew exactly where to take her. Brentwood Winery was my favorite in the area and I wanted their delicious wine to coat her tongue; I wanted her to see that beauty and escape were within reach. Most of all, I wanted her to see that I was willing to do anything just to make her smile.