Beautifully Used (The Beaumont Brothers Book 2) (17 page)

God, those five little words stiffened my cock to a degree I didn’t think possible. Hearing her tell me to make love to her made me realize how much I’d been in love with her all along.
The sensation of her body underneath mine and the way she shivered when I spoke seemed very erotic to me. I’d never taken this much care with a woman before. I needed her to know I wasn’t just having sex with her. If things worked out between us, which I’d do my damnedest to make sure of, I doubted I’d ever just have sex again. It would always be love-making with Gabrielle.

I took the liberty of kissing her thighs, caressing her soft skin, taking in the sweet exotic scent of
jasmine and vanilla she always wore. A scent that drove me crazy.

I loved how her breath hitched w
hen I told her I wanted to make love to her. Her entire body quivered. I wanted her to know that I didn’t want to treat her like all the other women I’d been with.

I inched her shirt up, revealing perfect breasts begging to be released from the black lace bra she wore.
I glanced at her to make sure she was okay. “Can I take this off?”

She nodded and I pulled
the tank up over her head. Her hair caught in the folds and she winced a little, but I managed to get them free. “Sorry.”

She placed her arms over her chest again and I slowly removed them. Something triggered
a thought in the back of my mind. A conversation we’d had weeks ago on the way to town, and I had to know. “Gabrielle, are you a virgin?”

A tear dripped down her check and I was sorry I
’d asked, realizing I could have just waited and found out. The last thing I wanted to do was spoil the moment, but she nodded. I don’t know why, but the idea of her never having been with anyone before me filled me with joy. “I’ll try and be gentle, I promise.”

“I trust you.”

“You do?” I asked adding as much incredibility to my tone as possible.

That made her laugh as she said, “Yes.”

Slowly, I pulled the straps of her bra down her arm and reached behind her to release the clasp. I kissed her, putting as much tenderness into it as I could, and splayed my fingers across her abdomen, moving my hand very slowly, inching my way up. She moaned as my hand covered her right breast. Taking her nipple in-between my thumb and finger, I watched as her hips bucked slightly and I knew she was enjoying what I was doing.

This was a far cry from the frenz
ied way we’d started this evening, but I was glad I’d decided to take a step back and slow down. Gabrielle deserved tenderness and delicate precision, and I wanted to give her that with all my heart.

After I unbuttoned her shorts and pulled them down, tossing them on the floor, I smiled at the matching black lace panties she wore.
I quickly got up and took off my own clothes, all except my boxers. I didn’t want her to feel as if she were there on display. Lying back down beside her, both of us in our underwear I took her mouth with mine. Tasting every inch of her and exploring her body with my hands before slipping a couple of my fingers down inside her panties where a soft mound of curls awaited further exploration. The prospect made me even harder, and I knew Gabrielle could feel my cock against her thigh as it twitched with eager excitement.

“I want to give myself to you. I want you to make love to me.”

I just about came undone and it took every ounce of stamina I had not to lose it and plunge into her right then. This girl would be the death of me. I knew I was falling, falling hard. “Baby, we are making love,” I huffed with heavy breath against her lovely neck.

Chapter 3
8

Brodie slowly pulled my panties down and off, then removed his own boxers. I knew my eyes must have doubled in size when I saw him completely naked that way. He was gorgeous,
every muscle in his chest to every ripple of his well-toned stomach was perfect. My eyes traveled to the v-shaped indents leading to his …
oh my ever loving God, how would that ever fit inside of me?
I had to admit, I hadn’t seen a full grown man this naked before, and I suddenly understood what all the fuss was about.

Brodie placed his fingers under my chin and closed my gaping mouth as he came to rest beside me. “You can still back out,” he said as he positioned his body over mine.

I shook my head. “No, I want to. More than anything.” I did. I needed to. I’d only had one experience with sex before, and that was a long time ago. An experience I’d like to forget, but knew I never would, at least not completely. But with this new experience, I knew I’d have a better way of coping with that other one if I allowed Brodie to make love to me. To show me the way a man is supposed to love a woman. Brodie made me feel special. I hadn’t lied about being a virgin, I was.

“Look at me,” he said. My eyes met his. “Can you see how beautiful I think you are?”

I couldn’t contain the tear of joy as it escaped the corner of my eye. He scooted his body down and kissed my thighs, caressing them gently. When he slipped his finger inside of me, my hips flexed involuntarily, the sensation rising with each movement, taking me to another dimension of true bliss. I became elated and full of dreams and ecstasy as my head filled with the roar of the ocean, even though we were nowhere close to any water.

I was no longer Gabrielle
Demeres. I was Gabrielle the goddess, cherished and adored by Brodie. For the first time in my life, I felt beautiful.

I reached for him and w
hen I touched him, wrapped my hand tightly around him, his breath hitched and he covered my mouth with his. The thick, hard length of his shaft in my hand made me feel wonderful and I could only image what it felt like for him. The skin was so soft and I rubbed my thumb over the tip.

Brodie reached down beside the bed
and rummaged through the pocket of his pants, then I heard the tear of the foil and closed my eyes, glad Brodie had thought of protection because I hadn’t been thinking about it at all.

“Gabrielle,” Brodie’s voice startled me as he climbed back up, his face above mine. “Take me in. Wrap your hand around me and guide me in.”

I took him there and guided him in. It didn’t take much force and he was inside of me. He slipped in gently and moved slowly. I could tell he took great care in what he was doing. I sensed an urgency in him, but he didn’t rush it.
As he pushed in further, I held my breath, expecting a lot of pain. A sharp sting made me tense and Brodie held still. "Are you okay?" I nodded and tried to relax. He moved again, slowly, and the pain disappeared as quickly as it came. The sensation became unlike anything I’d ever experienced. The feel of him sliding in felt so good, so natural, made me feel so alive.
I looked up at Brodie. He smiled at me. His eyes so full of promise and something else, something I’d never seen before. There was affection. He pulled up and almost out and stopped to look at me. “Are you okay?”

“Yes. I’m more than okay,”
I said, my breath heavy, lustful. The desire for him roared inside of me.

“Good.”

When he moved a bit faster, I couldn’t contain the moan of pleasure that escaped, and I hoped he didn’t think he was hurting me. But he continued and took me into ecstasy. I jerked my hips up, accepting, wanting him to know I needed him.

Chapter 39

While
skimming my fingers along her entrance, teasing, slipping through her wetness, tantalizing the little nub, I glanced up to watch Gabrielle, delighted to see her completely immersed in the sensation and loving everything I was doing. I slowly slipped two fingers into her, she was so tight, so wet, I knew it was time. When I entered her, Gabrielle pulled me in tightly and her heart pounded against my chest. My breath caught in my lungs with admiration and I was thrilled by the way she responded to me. No girl had ever been this sexy to me. At least none that I remembered. I was amazed Gabrielle had been a virgin. Though I knew by the way she’d first acted that she was. As she took me deeper and deeper, she shivered under me. All I wanted to do was please her, but she was taking me on a ride so full of lust and pleasure I cried out in jubilation as we ignited together.

I lay beside Gabrielle, arms around her, her head on my shoulder. I wanted Gabrielle to trust me
enough to open up to me and tell me what had happened to her in her past. Maybe now that we’d been intimate she would.

In my entire life, well, life after Beth, I’d never thought I’
d find anyone like Gabrielle. I held her close as the rapid beat of our hearts settled down.

“
Gabrielle, do you trust me?”

“Of course. I’m surprised you would ask me that now, after.”

“Right. I guess it’s not the best time for that question, but you know you can tell me anything, right?” I felt her shoulders tighten under my embrace.

“I suppose.”

“Well, do you think you can tell me now?”

“Tell you what?”

“Why you acted so strangely that night after you bumped into me with your milkshake.”

“I told you, I was acting out a scene.”

“Gabrielle, baby, you’re a great singer, and probably a very good writer, but acting? Come on. If that’s true, how come I’ve never seen you do it since?”

“Guess I haven’t needed to.”

“I’ve come to know you fairly well over the past couple of months. I’ve seen you in extreme elements of danger and I’ve seen you when you’re having fun. The state of mind you were in when you tried wiping the milkshake off of me was something else. It wasn’t you. You went somewhere, became someone else. I know it wasn’t drugs, but you most definitely went somewhere.”

She sighed and became silent.

“Gabrielle, you mean a lot to me. I care about you. Please tell me what happened. Please trust me with this. Believe me, there is nothing in this fucked up world we live in that could shock me.”

She pulled away from me and sat up. She kept her head down, focused on her hands, fingering a string from the frayed edge of the comforter. She bit her bottom lip and I hoped she was contemplating talking. “I don’t think you’ll look at me quite the same way when I tell you.”

“I doubt that. Gabrielle,” she looked at me. “I’m falling for you. Falling hard. There’s nothing you can say that will change that.”

“It might.”

I shook my head. “Please. Let me in.”

“When I was about
ten, my mom used to leave me with the neighbors when she went to work. It was only for a short time during those years when she was single. After she married Kurt, my stepfather, she didn’t have to work anymore because he … well he had plenty of money and we moved to Pacific Beach shortly after.”

I almost wanted to stop her. I had a sense of where this was going and I wanted to just hold her and make her feel loved and safe, but I knew she had to get it out or we’d be stuck with this vast empty hole between us.

“The neighbor boy, Thomas, and I were friends. He was a little older than me. He was thirteen, but we’d known each other almost our entire lives, and since we lived next door to each other, we played a lot as kids. One day we were in the backyard of his house and we were wrestling for the hammock. It was my turn, but he wanted more time on it. He yanked me off and I fell to the ground, rolling down the bank close to the creek. He followed after me, maybe he slipped too, I don’t remember, but he fell on top of me, and his hand landed on my crotch. I’d been wearing a dress that was up around my waist from the fall, so there were only my panties there. As he realized where his hand was and the fact that he was on top of me, he decided to explore further. He stuck his fingers inside of me. I told him to stop, but he wouldn’t. He said he could tell I liked it. I didn’t think I did, but I let him do it anyway since he was on top of me and I couldn’t move. At the time, I wasn’t even sure what he was doing. After a few minutes, he stopped and told me not to tell anyone and he let me up. I ran home. I looked up what he had done to me on the Internet and didn’t think we were old enough to be doing that. I thought I was bad for letting him, so I didn’t want to tell anyone.

“The next day
, when I went to his house while my mom worked I stayed inside close to his mom the entire time. I didn’t want to go out and play. I didn’t want to be alone with Thomas, so I told him I didn’t want to go outside. I told him I didn’t feel well. Weeks went by and he left me alone. One day at his house the electricity was off. Someone had hit a pole down the block and the entire court was out. It was hot in the house without air conditioning, and the only cool place was outside in the shade. His mom went next door to talk to the neighbors and see if they’d heard how long the electricity would be out, leaving us outside, thinking we were having fun playing. Thomas grabbed me and pulled me down the bank again. He said he wanted to show me something. When we got there, I realized he had a kitten in one of those have-a-heart traps people use to catch wild animals in. It was adorable. A little black and white kitten and I wanted to let it out and pet it. He took the kitten out but wouldn’t let me have it. When the kitten scratched him he cursed and held it by its little neck and took it to the creek, holding it under water. I screamed at him to stop and pulled on his arm, but he wouldn’t budge. It seemed like the poor thing struggled and splashed around forever until it finally went limp. I cried and asked him how he could do such a thing. He laughed and told me to stop crying. He said that he wanted to feel me again like before, and that if I didn’t let him or told anyone he would hurt my dog the same way he had the cat. After that, every time I went over there he used me. This went on for about two years, I think. He became obsessed with sex, and every chance he got, he used me to get off. He would jerk off all over himself and sometimes me. I guess that’s why I freaked out about the milkshake being on your chest. It reminded me of when he … ejaculated.”

I had to ask because I needed to hear the entire story.

“Did he ever have intercourse with you?”

“No. I told you the truth about being a virgin. At least when it came to that.”

I took her in my arms, caressing her gently. “Thank you for telling me.”

“Do you hate me now?”

“Hate you?” I lifted her chin up with my finger until her eyes met mine. “Gabrielle, I love you.”

“You love me?” The shock in her voice made me laugh, though it shouldn’t have.
Though I would rather have her tell me that she loved me, as well.

“I do,” I admitted shamelessly. “
I think I have for a while now. I just didn’t know it. But hearing your story made me realize that’s the reason I stopped being the asshole I’d been, treating women like they were nothing more than a toy. Using them, letting them use me. There was never any emotion. So no. I don’t hate you. I could never hate you. You’ve been used. You may be a beautifully used soul, Gabrielle, but I love you just the same. You were a child and he frightened you into letting him do those things. You don’t have anything to be ashamed of. You did nothing wrong.”

“
I always thought I had. I was a good girl. He stole that from me.”

“No
, he didn’t. You were never bad. You never stopped being good. He used you and molested you. He was older and took advantage of your age, your size, and he threatened you.”

“
I think we’ve both been used,” she added, bringing the subject back around to me, and I felt her shoulders relax a bit in my arms.

“It’s a little different. You had no choice. He’d threatened
those you loved, and by extension, you.”

“You were suffering emotionally,” she argued.

“I suppose I was. It took you to juggle me free.”

“Brodie?”

“Yeah.”

“I think I love you, too.”

“You think?”

“Yeah. I think.” She giggled at that.

“I guess that’ll have to do. Thanks for letting me inside your head and telling me about what happened. I know that must have been hard for you.”

“Thanks for making me tell you that horrible story. It suddenly doesn’t mean as much anymore. I mean the magnitude of it
. It’s always been back there, lurking in my mind. Maybe it always will, but now I don’t think it’s going to have as huge of an impact on the way I feel about things anymore. Now that it’s out and I’ve spoken the words, maybe it won’t be so hard to move on.”