Beautiful Mess (19 page)

“Ugh,
stupid motorcycle!” she yelled, her anger surging.  She decided she’d call
Layla in a minute to come pick her up, but right now she needed to put some
distance between her and Cole.  She made it to the end of the driveway
before a strong hand grabbed her arm and spun her around.  Cole grabbed
both of her arms and pulled her close.

“You’re
not getting off that easy, Bri.”  He forced her eyes to meet his.  “I
care about you, and I’m not letting you push me away anymore.  I’m
fighting for you, for us.  Because, though you may not think I’m capable
of it, I feel things for you that I’ve never felt for anyone before. 
Feelings that are anything but superficial.  And I can prove it.”

Without
warning, Cole pulled her in and crushed his lips to hers, almost angrily. 
Bri was so surprised that she couldn’t move for a second.  Then, utterly
insulted, she jerked back, breaking out of his grip.  She eyed him,
outraged.

“That
doesn’t prove anything,” her anger and venom dripping from each word.  She
tried to turn away, but Cole caught her and pulled her in again.

“I
wasn’t finished,” he whispered, and kissed her again.

This
kiss, though, took Bri’s breath away, decimating her resistance.  There
was no anger or frustration, just a deep, almost desperate need.  It
overwhelmed her.  Cole’s arms circled her, his hand cupping the back of
her head, holding her gently.  He kissed her with a tenderness and
intensity that had her trembling.  He poured out all of his longing, need,
and desire into that one gentle kiss. 

And
suddenly, something unlocked inside her, and everything changed.  It was
as if the world had shifted, and Bri knew it would never be the same. 
There was no fighting it anymore.

She
felt herself crumble beneath the weight of Cole’s emotion, and her own emotions
rose to meet his.  His hands moved up to cup her cheeks, and the defenses
Bri had so carefully constructed to keep him out, crumbled.  With a
delicious shiver, she stopped fighting and gave in.

She
moved to deepen the kiss, and felt Cole’s joy as he responded, eagerly but
still gently.  Bri arms wound around him and pulled him tighter to
her.  She poured out everything inside her, as she kissed him
desperately.  It was like she was drowning, and Cole was the oxygen she
couldn’t live without.  It was the most wonderful, exhilarating,
terrifying experience of her life, and she was reveling in it.

A
car drove past them, and she jumped back startled.  She had completely
forgotten where they were, making out on the side of the road where anyone
could see them.  She giggled nervously as her cheeks flushed with
embarrassment.

Cole
looked up and down the street.  “Um, would you like to come back
inside?”  He gave her a half smile.

“Yeah,
I think that’d be a good idea.”  Bri took Cole’s outstretched hand and let
him lead her back to the house.  Awed, she couldn’t stop staring at him as
they walked.  He somehow looked different to her.  Everything seemed
different, better.  She’d always been attracted to him, though she’d tried
to deny it, but now she let herself fully appreciate how irresistible he really
was. 

Cole
let her in and closed the door behind him.  He stood there, hands in his
pockets, looking like he wasn’t sure what to do next.  His uncertainty
melted Bri’s heart.

“So,
I guess this means we should probably talk,” he smiled sheepishly.

“Probably.” 
Her eyes travelled over Cole’s body, and her pulse picked up.  “But, is
there any way you’d be willing to postpone the talking for a little bit?”

“Have
something better in mind?”  Cole’s eyes darkened with desire.

“I
have an idea or two,” she whispered.

Then
suddenly, as if a signal passed between them, Bri and Cole rushed towards each
other, their bodies and lips colliding.

This
kiss was nothing like the emotional, tender kiss outside.  This kiss was a
hot, raging inferno.  This was months and months of repressed desire
finally given the freedom it had longed for.  There was nothing soft or
delicate about the way Cole kissed her, and there was no hesitation on Bri’s
part as she matched his intensity.  Cole’s tongue found hers, and
proceeded to do things that made her knees weak.

He
effortlessly lifted her, and never breaking their kiss, skillfully and smoothly
maneuvered them onto the couch.  His hands grabbed her hips, pulling her
closer.  Her fingers swam through his soft, dark hair, as they’d been
itching to do since she’d met him, trying to pull him as close as she
could.  But it wasn’t close enough.  She needed more of him.

As
if sensing her thoughts, Cole laid her back on the couch and covered her with
his body.  Bri reveled in the feel of his warm, hard chest pressed against
hers, their intertwined legs, the way they seemed to fit together
perfectly.  Their kissing intensified, neither of them wanting to let
up.  Cole’s fingers tangled in her hair, and Bri’s dug into his back,
holding him tightly, determined never to let go.  They kissed each other
hungrily, until Bri thought she’d pass out from lack of oxygen.  Heart
pounding, she pulled back slightly, finally breaking the kiss.

“Okay,”
she panted, “maybe we’d better get to the talking now.”  At Cole’s dubious
expression, she continued.  “If you keep kissing me like that, you’re
going to put me into a coma or something.”

“I’m
not the one with the lethal mouth, baby,” he smiled down at her.  “I don’t
know who taught you how to kiss like that, but I’m torn between hunting him
down and killing him, or sending him a thank-you fruit basket!

Bri
laughed, and felt the echoing rumble in Cole’s chest as he joined her. 
Feeling suddenly shy, she dropped her gaze.

“I’ve
never kissed anyone like that before,” she admitted quietly, unable to stop the
flush in her cheeks.  “Just you.”  She chanced a glance up at Cole
through her lashes, hoping he understood what she meant, and that she didn’t
sound like an idiot.

He
was watching her intently.  He lifted her chin, forcing her to meet his
eyes.

“I’ve
never kissed anyone like that, either,” her replied before lowering his lips to
hers again.

Bri’s
heart sang as she lost herself in his kisses.  After a few minutes though,
she pushed him back again.

“No,
we can’t start that again.”  She had her hands pressed against his chest,
and she could feel Cole’s heart pounding beneath her palm, dangerously weakening
her resolve.  “I don’t think I could stop you again, and there are some
things we should probably talk about.”  She tried to look and sound stern,
but figured it was less than effective when she was staring longingly at Cole’s
mouth.  A smug grin turned up those sexy-as-hell lips, and snapped her out
of her trance.  “Stop that,” she swatted at him, trying to sit up. 
He held her pinned beneath him.

“Is
that what you want to do right now?  Talk?”  He smiled at her
devilishly before leaning down to whisper in her ear.  “Because what I
want to do is much more fun,” he purred before nibbling her earlobe.

A
soft moan escaped her, and Bri knew her willpower wouldn’t last much longer.

“No,”
she groaned, honestly, “it’s not what I want to do.  But it’s what we need
to do.”

Cole
dropped his head onto her shoulder, and Bri let out a sigh of relief, and
disappointment, as he sat up, pulling her with him.  He kicked his feet up
on the coffee table,  and snuggled Bri up against his side.

“Okay,
Ambria,” his arm wrapped around her, and he tucked her head under his
chin.  “What do we need to talk about?”

Bri
listened to his heart beat for a few seconds before she gathered up the courage
to ask quietly, “What does this mean?  For us?”

Cole
let out a long breath.  “Wow, Bri, way to put me on the spot.  I’ve
already told you how I feel about you, but you have yet to return the
favor.  I can’t answer that yet, not until I know how you feel.”

She
nodded against his chest.  Cole was right.  It wasn’t fair of her to
make him define their relationship, especially when he didn’t know if she even
felt the same way.  Taking a deep breath, she decided it was time to do
the most frightening thing she could think of... be honest with Cole, and tell
him how she felt about him. 

“You
are all I think about, too,” she admitted quietly, immensely grateful he
couldn’t see her face.  “Ever since the first day we met.  Even when
I was angry at you, and trying to ignore you, I couldn’t stop thinking about
you.  I tried to convince myself that it was nothing, that I didn’t really
feel anything for you.  But deep down I always knew better.  I like
you, Cole.  I care about you.  You make me laugh, and when I’m around
you I’m happier than I can remember being in a long time.  The more I get
to know you, the more I want to know.  And you’re sexy as hell.  It’s
like I can’t get enough of you.  And as much as I don’t like it, as much
as I’ve tried to fight it, you consume me.”  Wow, she hadn’t meant to be
that
honest, but there it was.  Once she started, the words seemed to just
pour out of her.  She couldn’t look at Cole, she was way too embarrassed,
but she was glad that it was finally all out in the open.  “I think I’m
finally ready to stop fighting and take a chance on you.  I want to give
us a chance.”

Cole
sat quietly for a few moments.  Bri held her breath, waiting for his
reaction.  She was too nervous to chance a look at him, to see what he
might be thinking.  So she sat, her heart pounding, waiting for him to
respond.  She felt him release a huge breath, and she almost sighed in
relief when his arms tightened around her.

“I
have to admit,” he kissed the top of her head, “I never thought I’d ever hear
you say that.”  He let out a sigh.  “I want to give us a chance, too,
more than anything.  But I’m worried things are too complicated for us to
work.”

Bri
nodded, knowing exactly how he felt.  “Are you talking about
Serena?”  She picked the most obvious of the complications.

“I
still don’t want to give her an excuse to ruin your life,” he exhaled sadly. 
“I broke it off with Serena because I knew that us being together was hurting
you, and I didn’t want to hurt you anymore.  But the fact is, she doesn’t
want me to be with anyone except her.  I want to protect you.  I
don’t want to expose you to the kind of rumors and attacks I know Serena will
launch at you.”

“So,
what, you’re going to let Serena dictate what we do?”  She sat up to face
him.  “How is that fair to me?  To us?”

“See,
this is why I’m afraid things won’t work between us.”  Cole shook his
head, frustrated.  “I know this isn’t fair to you, but I’m asking you to
trust me on this.  Dating me comes with some complications, one of which
being a very jealous, very territorial ex who can be downright vicious when she
wants to be.  If that’s too much for you, I’ll understand.  But if
you want me, you have to take all of me,” he finished quietly.

Bri
thought about that for a moment.

“So,
what is it you’re asking of me?  What is it you want me to do?”

“I
just want us to keep things quiet for a while, that’s all.  We don’t have
to keep our relationship secret forever, just a few weeks until I can get
Serena used to the fact that I’ve moved on.”

“And
what exactly would our relationship be?” she asked softly.

“I
want
you
.  I want to be with you.  You’re it for me. 
You’re everything I’ve ever wanted, and more.  You’ve ruined me,
Bri.”  He looked deep into her eyes.  “There will never be anyone
else for me but you.”

As
Bri gazed back at him, a hint of doubt crept into her.  She knew Cole was
sincere about how he felt.  He really cared about her.  But, would he
want all of her?

“Are
you sure, Cole?  Because I’m not without my own baggage and complications,
too.  I’m a mess,” she almost sobbed.  “A big emotional mess, full of
issues and insecurities.  Are you sure you want to deal with that? 
Are you sure you really want all
of me?”  She looked at him
desperately.

“Baby,
if you’re a mess, then I’m a certified disaster,” he chuckled.  He cupped
her cheeks with his hands, forcing her to look at him.  “You may be a
mess, but you’re a beautiful mess.  And I wouldn’t want you any other
way.”  He smiled warmly.

Bri
felt her heart melting.  “I wouldn’t want you any other way, either,” she
returned his smile.  Cole leaned in and placed a soft kiss on her lips.

“So,
does this mean...?” he trailed off.

“Yes.” 
She hated that she was the one forced to define things for them.  “We are
unofficially, officially together.  And I agree to keep this quiet for
now.  But,” she leveled Cole with a firm look, “I am not going to spend
the rest of this year hiding from Serena Blake.  Do you understand?”

“Completely. 
It’ll only be a few weeks, tops.  And in the meantime,” he grinned
wickedly, “we’ll just have to be sneaky and creative.  Because not even
Serena’s wrath could keep me away from you.”

“It
better not.”  Bri reached her arms up around his neck.

“Well,
now that we’ve cleared things up, can we get back to the fun stuff?”  His
arms drew her closer.