Beautiful Lies (29 page)

Liana felt a pinch of hope. “Phone her, Cullen. Get her to do it right now.”

He consulted his watch. “Most likely that won't be any faster. It's about noon there. She'll be off around the farm
somewhere—down at the canteen, most likely. But she'll check her mail as soon as she gets back. She always does. And I'll have her ring me the moment she checks mine.”

As he spoke, he composed a quick letter to Sarah. Liana read it over his shoulder. “But she won't know this is from you, will she? You'll be using Matthew's account, so won't it look like it's from him?”

“Just in the heading. I'll sign the letter. You don't spend much time at the computer, do you?”

He activated the program and waited as it went through the steps to connect. Then, just as quickly, the computer logged off.

“That's odd.” Cullen leaned over, as if being closer would help him understand what he saw.

“What is it?”

“It says the account is already signed on.”

“That has to be a mistake, doesn't it?”

“Does Matthew share this account with anyone?”

“What do you mean?”

“Whose name is on the account, Lee?”

She heard the impatience in his voice. “Mine. It's billed to my credit card.”

“Well, you're bloody well not surfing the net at another computer, are you?” He activated the program again. The same thing happened once more.

Cullen slapped his hand on the desk in frustration. “Did you give Stanford Matthew's password? Or yours?”

“I don't know Matthew's password. And no one asked for mine.”

“So by rights, unless Matthew's given his password to a friend, this computer is the only place anyone besides him should be able to access his account. But right now someone is using it.”

“Matthew?”

“Maybe.”

She waited for an explosion of joy, but Cullen's tone was anything except relieved. “What's the other possibility?”

He spun the chair to face her. “It might be someone else.”

“Someone else? But how? Why?”

“How? I don't know for certain. Someone may have figured out his password through trial and error. Kids like to use descriptions or nicknames, so they'll remember. Someone who knows him might have made a lucky guess. Maybe his password is something obvious like his birth date, although I've warned him that's not a good idea. Or maybe he stored it somewhere and somebody found it.”

Her tears had long since dried, but now a shudder snaked up her spine. “That leaves why, doesn't it?”

He said nothing.

“Why, Cullen? If Matthew's not using his own account, why would someone else want to use it?”

“It could simply be a friend trying to get free Internet access while Matthew's gone.”

“And?”

“It could be someone looking for him, Lee. Someone searching for clues from his E-mail, just the way we are.”

“Why would anyone…?” She stared at Cullen and saw he knew something she didn't. “What do you know?”

“When Stanford rang Matthew's bank to see about his account, he discovered he wasn't the first person to check it.”

“He didn't tell me that.”

“He didn't want to worry you unnecessarily.”

“Maybe it was the police.”

“Maybe, but I think we have to face the possibility that someone else might be trying to find Matthew.”

“Someone who wants to hurt him? But why?”

“If Matthew has the pearl, Lee—”

“Matthew doesn't have the pearl! He wouldn't steal from me.”

“Then who would benefit most if Matthew never came back home?”

“I don't know what you mean.”

“Your father left almost everything he owned to Matthew, didn't he?”

She tried to think how best to explain it. “It's a tricky will. Graham and I have use of a reasonable share of the money as long as we're working for Pacific International. But yes, after all's said and done, Matthew stands to inherit everything.”

“And if he doesn't live that long? Who gets it?”

“Graham…” She breathed the word as if it were cyanide she was expelling from her lungs.

Cullen fell silent again.

Liana shook her head. “No, Cullen. I just won't believe it. Graham and I are hardly best friends, but he wouldn't hurt Matthew. As long as he stays at Pacific International, he's a rich man, anyway. What could he want that he can't have now?”

“Control over his life?”

She stared at him. Thomas had set up his will to bind his family to Pacific International forever. Even Matthew had to dance to a dead man's tune in order to inherit what should rightfully have been his without strings. In death, as in life, Thomas had insisted on having his way.

But if Matthew died, Graham's power increased a hundredfold.

“I'm not saying Graham kidnapped our son,” Cullen said. “But it seems that someone's looking for him as hard as we are, Lee. Maybe Graham's only trying to take advantage of a golden opportunity.”

She knew she couldn't afford to dismiss any theories, that Matthew's survival might depend on questioning her loyalties. But the possibility that Graham might want Matthew dead made her sick.

“Just think about it.” Cullen turned his chair and tried once more to access Matthew's account. This time he logged on without difficulty. Whoever had been using the account had logged off.

“Check his mail, too,” she said.

“If someone read it just now, they may have deleted it.”

“We have to tell Stanford about this.”

Cullen didn't turn. He was too intent on the screen. “How closely does Stanford work with Graham?”

She realized Cullen was asking if Stanford could be trusted. “I can't stand this, Cullen.”

“Lee…” He pointed to a box he'd just opened. “These are the people who can access this account. Just you and Matthew.”

“I told you that. No one else is authorized to use the account. Just us.”

“Have you checked your E-mail?”

“I never use the account. I've never even given anyone my screen name. I never—”

He cut her off. “Who set this up, then?”

“Matthew did, of course. He wanted me to learn…. Oh.” She realized what Cullen was saying.

Cullen exited, went back and selected Liana's screen name, and began the process again. “I'm assuming he programmed in your password.”

She tried to think. “I don't know. It's Cruella. He was mad at me for something the day he set it up. We had a good laugh afterwards.”

“It's stored in the computer. It's working. It's logging on.”

“Why didn't I think of this?” She leaned forward, praying she would see mail from her son. A man's voice announced that she had mail. She watched as one letter was retrieved and the program shut down.

Cullen clicked the mouse on Incoming Mail and the letter was listed. “SEZ. That's not Matthew's screen name,” Cullen said.

“Matthew had mail from someone named SEZ, Cullen. I picked up something from him the first time I checked his mail.”

“Him?”

“A figure of speech. It wasn't signed.” She watched as Cullen opened the letter.

Cullen read out loud as she followed the letter silently. “Mom, I'm all right. I promise you don't have to worry. I can take care of myself, and I won't be gone long. I guess when I get back I'll have to stay in my room for the rest of my life. Please tell Dad I'm sorry. I really wanted to go on that camping trip more than anything.”

“Love, Matthew.” Liana read the last two words aloud, and her voice broke.

This time she didn't resist when Cullen rose and took her in his arms.

“L
ee, he's all right.”

Cullen could feel Liana trying to compose herself, but her voice was muffled against his shoulder. “What if he didn't write this? Or what if he wrote it under duress? Maybe he was fine when he sent it, but he isn't now.”

He held her close and stroked her hair. Her body was subtly feminine, but like everything else about her, the promise of what lay just out of his reach was most powerful. It was the elusive lure of her mind and heart that had always drawn him.

“Lee.” He lifted her chin with his fingertips. Her eyes were red-rimmed and haunted. “We have to believe he's all right. What's the point in believing anything else?”

“How can you say that? He's only fourteen!”

“We have to keep looking for him. But this is the first good news we've had since he disappeared. Now we have to find a bit of faith. In Matthew. In our ability to find him.”

He watched her struggle. He had given her little or no reason to have faith in him. Life had given her little rea
son to have faith in happy endings. But life had also given her Matthew, and Cullen reminded her of that now.

“I know you've had a hard shake of it, but no matter what else has happened in your life, Matthew's a gift. We're going to bring him home. You have to believe it.”

“Why are you so strong?”

“I'm not as strong as you think. Tell me we're going to find him. That'll make me stronger.”

“Nothing I ever said or did changed anything about you.”

“You're wrong.”

“I can't…” She shook her head.

“We're going to find him. Tell me we're going to do this together. Whatever it takes. Tell me.”

He watched her weigh a lifetime of disappointment against the flicker of faith that had refused to be extinguished.

“You love him. As much as I do,” she said. It wasn't a question.

“Enough to bring him home. But only if you're with me.”

“Yes. Okay.”

“Lee…” He managed a smile, but it faded at the expression in her eyes. She was terrified, as if by telling him she trusted him she had opened herself up to a lifetime of sorrow.

“I'm not going to hurt you. I'll cut out my heart before I hurt you again.”

“I'll sharpen the knife.”

He didn't think about what he did next. Impulsiveness had been his trademark, and he hadn't eradicated it completely. Her lips trembled, and he touched them with his own as a promise. But at the first warm whisper of flesh against flesh, he knew what a mistake he had made.

He lifted his head, and in her eyes he saw the same emotions he felt. Shock. Discovery. Resurrection.

He knew that anything he could say was inadequate or
dangerous. He stepped back, as if what had happened was the most natural thing in the world, and spoke about the one thing guaranteed to deflect her attention.

“Then we have a bargain. We'll bring Matthew home, no matter what it takes. And the first thing we have to do is find out who SEZ is. He or she plays a part in all this. At the least, he sent on a message from our son.”

“I E-mailed SEZ after I got the message addressed to Matthew. I never got a reply.”

“Did you check member profiles?”

“Stanford tried to get profiles for everyone, but he said registration was voluntary. I'm fairly sure SEZ wasn't listed.”

Cullen turned away to log back on. He was glad to have a moment to compose himself. A quick check of the provider's membership directory showed she was right. “We might be able to force them to turn over SEZ's name and address, but I reckon it would take a battle, and we don't have time.”

“Stanford might know how to shortcut the process.”

“Let's leave him out of it for the moment. I think we should tell him we're going to pursue a few things on our own.”

“He'll suspect something's up. And besides, he'll wonder why we're not hovering beside the phone.”

“Then let him know you're convinced Matthew ran away, and we want to try our luck looking for him without the police in tow. Tell him Sue's agreed to field telephone calls and that you'll have your cell phone with you. But right now, I think our time will be best spent talking to Matthew's friends. One of them may know who SEZ is. What about schoolmates? If we're lucky, SEZ is local.”

“And easily intimidated…”

“I'm going to send a message to everyone in Matthew's Internet address book. It's time we started being straight-
up about what's happening. After you've talked to Stanford, start ringing Matthew's friends. By the time we go to bed tonight, we'll know exactly what we have to do next.”

She brushed her fingertips against his shoulder, an unexpected and bittersweet affirmation.

He closed his eyes and wished he could begin his life all over again.

 

Alicia Rivera had boy-short black hair, distinctive features she hadn't quite grown into, and a gold spike in her nose that she touched frequently for reassurance.

“Alicia, you tell these people what they want to know, you understand me?” Mrs. Rivera, a less flam boy ant version of her daughter, sat forward on the sofa in her Daly City apartment and stared daggers at Alicia. “I've got a shipment of Carole Little coming in any minute. I've got no time to waste.”

Liana glanced at Cullen. She doubted he had slept well last night, but he was completely focused on Alicia, his gaze understanding, his Akubra twisting with masculine grace in his hands. If the teenager didn't respond to Cullen's warmth or her mother's threats, it wasn't because either of them hadn't pulled out all the stops.

Inside the apartment, dust motes danced in a shaft of morning sunshine. Outside on the busy avenue, the harsh squeal of brakes was followed by angry shouts and horns, and in the dress shop below, someone turned up a soft-rock radio station to drown out the noise.

“Carole Little,” Mrs. Rivera repeated. “And if we're still here waiting for you to say something, I'm not going to be happy. You understand me, Alicia?”

“I don't know any SEZ.” Alicia's nose spike wobbled as her pout deepened. “I told them.”

Cullen leaned closer. “As a matter of fact, what you told
Matthew's mother last night was that you didn't rat out your friends. That's just a bit different, wouldn't you say?”

The teenager's expression was poised somewhere between sullen and scared. Liana could see they were going to lose her. “Alicia, I know Matthew only chooses good friends. Loyal kids who would never do anything to hurt him. But sometimes you can hurt somebody by doing what they ask you to. You'd stop a friend if he was drinking and wanted to drive, wouldn't you? Don't you see? Matthew has disappeared. And he could be in danger.”

“Car-ole Lit-tle…” Mrs. Rivera looked at her watch.

Liana forced patience into her voice. “Mrs. Rivera, we can talk to Alicia alone, if that's better for you. We'll be finished in a few minutes anyway.”

Mrs. Rivera stood and pointed a finger at Alicia. “You tell them what they want to know.” In a moment she had disappeared down the stairs.

“Car-ole Lit-tle,” Alicia singsonged, in perfect imitation, once her mother was out of earshot.

“Will you help us, Alicia?” Liana said.

“What'll you do to Matthew when you find him?”

“Hug him to death.”

Alicia sighed. “I don't know where he went or anything. He didn't tell
me
he was running away.”

Liana nodded, as if she had all the time in the world.

“But Simon might know,” Alicia said at last.

“Simon?”

“Simon Van Valkenburg.”

“Does Simon go to school with you and Matthew?” Cullen said.

“No. He doesn't go to school anywhere. He's a genius. But maybe…like he's a friend of a friend of mine. Like, maybe I introduced them.”

“Is Simon SEZ?” The moment she said it, Liana knew. “Simon SEZ. Of course.”

Alicia didn't answer, but Cullen was frowning.

“Simon Says,” Liana explained. “It's a children's game. I used to play it with Matthew when he was little. That's probably where Simon got his screen name.”

“Sometimes he's pretty stupid for a genius,” Alicia said, attempting to toss her short locks.

“Are Simon and Matthew good friends?” Liana asked.

“Maybe.”

Liana knew she needed one thing more. She said a silent prayer that Alicia wouldn't refuse her. “Alicia, please. Will you give me Simon's address? If you prefer, I won't tell him where I got it.”

“Are the cops going to talk to him?”

“Just us. I promise.”

Alicia considered, then she shrugged. “I guess I can give it to you. But don't tell Matthew what I did. Okay? I really like him. I don't want him to be mad at me.”

 

“The future Mrs. Matthew Llewellyn?” Cullen opened the car door for Liana. He had flatly refused to be driven here in the company car, preferring to brave the San Francisco traffic in hers. But Cullen was driving. In the past year Liana's terror of open spaces had spread to getting behind the wheel of her own Miata.

Liana snapped her seat belt in place. “She's not a bad kid, but she'll have to lose the nose spike.”

Cullen got in on the driver's side and started the engine. “Are you doing okay?”

“Fine.” Liana was doing better than she had expected. She had braved the walk to and from the Riveras' apartment with little more than trembling knees.

He flashed her the same grin he'd used on Alicia, and something tugged inside her. For too many years Cullen's smiles had reduced her good sense and multiplied her flaws. She had allowed that questionable equation to rule her life. And when he'd kissed her last night, she had seen how little that had changed.

“Can you get us there, Lee?”

Alicia had told them that Simon lived in a condo on Green Street in Russian Hill, and Liana was familiar with the block of bay-windowed buildings juxtaposed with sixties concrete high-rises. She gave Cullen instructions, and he set off, weaving in and out of traffic.

“I wish we could have talked to Aunt Mei.” Liana had phoned her aunt twice that morning, but both times Betty had insisted Mei wasn't feeling well and needed to rest. Liana had hoped to question her some more about her story and its relevance to Matthew. But clearly Mei had said all she was going to.

Cullen pulled into the right lane and slowed as he neared a freeway entrance ramp. “It would be like her to make us work this out by ourselves, wouldn't it? She's told her story, now it's up to us.”

“I suppose. Maybe there's something in the Robeson blood that makes us exasperating.”

“Matthew's never mentioned this Simon to you?” Cullen said when they were on the Junipero Serra Freeway heading east.

“Alicia, yes. Simon, no.” He drove the red Miata like a devil-may-care foreigner used to the other side of the road, but she felt safe enough. “And he hasn't mentioned Simon to you?”

“No.”

“Graham says I baby him. Maybe Simon was Mat
thew's way of breaking free. Maybe having a friend I didn't know about made him feel grown up.”

“Or maybe he knew you wouldn't approve.”

“I don't restrict his friends, Cullen. Not any more than you would.”

“I believe you. But maybe he'd never presented anyone quite like Simon to you.”

“Maybe not, but he collects oddballs. He gets that from you. He's never met a stranger.”

“Is that how you saw me?”

“I envied you for it. I wanted to be that way. But I was always afraid I'd trust the wrong people.”

“And then you did. You trusted me.”

“Maybe we ought to stop right there.”

“I've thought a lot about our marriage in the years since it ended. I think when we met, we saw each other clearly. But what we saw were the real people hiding under the trappings. And when two people marry, the trappings come with them.”

Scenery sped by. Glimpses of oddly sculptured hills, tile roofs gleaming in sunlight, gray lengths of freeway that set each image apart like the sashing between colorful quilt blocks. Somewhere deep inside her imagination, Liana saw semiprecious gems set beside flowing pewter rivers. She pushed the vision away as she always did now, an idea unborn and unwelcomed.

Cullen fell silent.

“All right. You've hooked me,” she said at last. “Go on. What did we see and what were the trappings?”

“What did you want when you married me, Lee?”

She thought a while. “A strong man. Someone I could count on. Someone I could make a life with.”

“That man was there, only I buried him so deeply it took years to find him.”

How could she dispute that without causing another argument? Besides, the mere fact that they were discussing their relationship was an example of how much Cullen
had
changed.

“What did you want when you married me?” she asked in return.

“A free spirit. Someone who didn't make demands. A woman so confident that I didn't have to offer anything I didn't want to give.”

Something tightened in her chest. “Boy, you can really pick ‘em, can't you?”

“You were that woman, Lee. You followed me to the wilds of Australia. You cocked a snook at every blighter who tried to stand in your way. You made do with nothing and never whined or fretted.”

“I was scared to death.”

“But you had a bash at it anyway.”

“Because I thought we were building something together.”

“And that scared me to death.”

“Damned from the start, huh?”

“Maybe. Or maybe if we'd looked beyond the trappings, maybe if we'd had the courage to be the people we wanted to be, we could have made it.”

“Courage? I think looking backwards has skewed your vision. Mine has always been in short supply. And now I can't even cross a street without feeling like the universe is caving in.”