Beast in Shining Armor (15 page)

“Bella…”

“Shut-up. 
I’m not speaking to you!”

“…people
spend their whole lives looking for their True Love.”  Avenant finished,
ignoring her interruption.  “It’s what we’re all hoping to find.  Don’t you
want that?”

“Of
course I want it.  But, not with
you
.”

Avenant
had anticipated that response, but the rejection still felt like a knife in the
chest.  His looked down at the ground, too resigned to even be angry.  “And you
wonder why I had to trick you into this.”  He muttered.  “You would never give
me a chance, otherwise.  If it were up to you, I’d be alone forever.”

“It’s
not my fault you’re sneaky and manipulative and cold!”

“It’s
not my fault, either.”  He snapped.  “It’s part of being Bad.  I can’t become
some knight in shining armor, no matter what either of us might want.”  When he
was in college, Avenant had actually tried to join the Knight Academy to
impress her, but his father had laughed at the idea and blocked his entrance.  Beasts
weren’t welcomed in the hallowed halls.  “Bad people do Bad things.  It’s who I
am.”

Belle’s
lips thinned.  “I think Scarlett’s right.  I think Good and Bad are just
labels.  I think you choose to be an amoral jackass.  I’ve seen moments when
you’ve been as Good as anyone.  You saved my life yesterday, without even
thinking about it.”

“That’s
different.”  What he’d do for Belle was
completely
different than what
he could manage for anyone else in the world.  She was the only Good part of
him.

“It’s
not
different.”  She jabbed a finger at his chest.  “You’re not some
crazed animal.  You
choose
to be Bad, Avenant.  You choose it so often,
you think it’s your nature.”

“It
is
my nature.  I’m Bad all the way through.  You’ve said so yourself.”

“Well,
explain why I should ever accept you as my True Love, then?”  She crossed her
arms across her chest.  “Why would I want someone who’s wholly Bad?”

Avenant
had no ready answer for that.  Why
should
Belle want him?  Nobody could
want a beast.  His mind raced for a plausible argument to trick her into this.

“You’re
the one who created this mess.”  She pressed when he remained silent.  “You
must have some idea as to why it’s a good plan for me to be with you, when you
can’t even be nice.”

Goddamn
it.  What was he supposed to say?  Whatever it was, he needed to think of it
fast.  Belle was right on the edge of walking away.  And without Belle, he
might as well be locked in that cell, again.

Avenant
went with the obvious sales pitch.  “I told you, I have a castle and…”

“So
help me, do
not
mention those horses, again!  I don’t even ride, you
idiot.  Tell me a real reason I should give you a chance.”

He
was forever asking Belle to give him a reason.  Having the tables turned was
disconcerting.  “A reason you should be with me?”  He echoed.  “Because… I can
take care of you better than anyone else could.”  That was true.  No other man
would guard her half as ferociously.

She
snorted.  “I don’t need somebody to take care of me.  I just need somebody who
needs me back.”

God,
the woman really did drive him insane.  “Who the fuck could need you more than
I do?  Look at me!  Everyone hates me, I’m barely holding it together in this
tiny little space, and I’ve just escaped from a mental institution!  Obviously,
I’m a very needful guy.”

“But…”

He
cut her off.  “Why would I even be doing this if I didn’t need you?  Don’t you
think there are easier ways to get a woman into bed?  I’m lost in a goddamn
tomb, because it was the only way I could get
you
.”

Belle
frowned at him, still not convinced.

Avenant
scraped a hand through his hair.  “And it’s not that I don’t
want
to be
nice, it’s that I don’t know
how
.”  He belatedly admitted.  “My parents
weren’t exactly role models on how it works.  They hated everyone.  Especially
me.”

Belle
blinked at him in surprise.  Avenant had never said anything like that to her
before.  He’d never said anything like that to
anyone
before.  Talking
about his parents made him
think
about his parents and he never wanted
to think about those assholes, again.

Avenant
cleared his throat and glanced away.  He didn’t like feeling so exposed.  “Look,
I know you’re not happy about this.  Why would you be?  But, I can’t help what
I am.  The Beast is inside of me and it won’t go away.  Believe me, I’ve
investigated every spell and potion you can imagine trying to get rid of it.”

“Inside
of you?”  She repeated, looking as confused as he felt.  “You mean literally?”

“Yes!” 
Avenant nodded.  “So, if you want a logical reason why you should accept me as
your True Love, this is it: Without you in my life, the Beast will take control
and people will suffer.  I promise you.  You are all that anchors me.  You care
about the Northlands.  You’re a better ruler than I ever was.  You should stick
around to make sure the Beast doesn’t flatten the whole kingdom.”

“You
think this thing inside of you is another whole… being?”

“Of
course it is.  I know you’ve seen flashes of it.  Its eyes glow and its voice
gets darker.  It’s a monster I have to keep chained.  My parents knew I was an
animal at heart.  It’s why they were so hard on me.”  He couldn’t believe he
was defending the fuckers.  “They wanted me to have discipline.”

“That’s
ridiculous.  You can instill discipline without torturing a child.”

“The
doctors didn’t think so.  They told my parents to keep me locked up as much as
possible.  But it wasn’t the cages that kept me in control.  It was knowing that
you
were out there.  It’s always been you.”  He shook his head.  “The Beast
and I both know you’re ours.  We’re not going to give up our True Love.  You
can call it selfish, but it’s just our nature.  We need you.”

Belle
hesitated, looking skeptical.  “How could there be an actual monster inside of
you?  Two separate beings in one body?  I’ve never heard of anything like that
happening before.”

“I
don’t know, but it’s there.”

“What
would happen if you let it loose?”

Avenant
frowned.  “Something Bad.”

“You’ve
never tried unchaining it to find out?”

“No!” 
Was she kidding?  “Pieces of it come out, but never all at once.  All my life
the doctors have said it would be a disaster to lose control over it.  My
parents would beat me whenever they saw even a flash of it.  I wouldn’t…”

Belle
cut him off.  “You’re better than your parents, Avenant.”  Most of her anger
seemed to fade.  “And you can be much better than they gave you credit for --Better
than you give
yourself
credit for-- if you try.  If that Beast
is
in you, I don’t think it’s all Bad.”

Avenant
had no idea what to say to something so… idiotic.

Belle
was brilliant.  Truly brilliant.  How could she possibly say something so dumb? 
“You really believe that?”  He asked after a long moment.

“Yes.” 
Her voice was firm.  “I
have
seen flashes of him and he isn’t some
crazed monster.  He’s never tried to harm me, even when you and I were arguing. 
I don’t think the Beast is the problem, I think
you
are.

The
Beast preened under her words, wanting to get closer to her.  It hated it when
Belle was upset, usually blaming Avenant for their disagreements.  Avenant
wasn’t surprised that somehow he was the villain in Belle’s mind, too.  The two
of them were the biggest headaches in his life, so of course they’d be on the same
side.

“You
like
pushing people away, Avenant.”  Belle continued.  “You don’t want
to be close to anyone.  I spent my whole childhood being ignored and not
fitting in with my family.  I won’t do that again.”

Avenant
had always disliked Belle’s flighty, self-involved parents.  They hadn’t known
what to do with their oddball daughter, so they’d ignored her.  It was one of
the reasons he and Belle had forged such a strange bond.  The two of them had
been the kids whose parents didn’t care enough to walk them to school, or put
their drawings on the fridge, or tuck them in at night.  Underneath everything,
their isolation had always linked them.

“You
say you need me,” she swept her hair behind her ears, “but I’ve reached out to
you again and again and you were a total asshole.”

“I
just wanted you to pay attention.”

“You
just wanted to be an asshole.”  She jabbed a finger at him.  “I won’t be Trues
Loves with someone who’s cold to me.  If there’s a chance in a million of this
working, you need to let me in.  You need to be honest and unguarded and
not
an asshole.”

Belle
wanted him to surrender.

No,
no, no, no, no.  Avenant actually shook his head at the idea.  He wasn’t doing
that. 
She
had to be the one to give in.  Anything else would be
failure.  It would be
weakness
.  Belle wouldn’t even want him if he
broke down and told her everything that was in his heart.  She would laugh at
him.  The only way this would work is if he
won
.  If he showed her he
was strong.  Then, she’d looked at him and just… know.

The
labyrinth began to move again and cutting off his frantic thoughts.

Belle
scrambled backwards to watch the shrubbery reposition itself.  A new pathway
opened up, which meant they were no longer trapped.  Unfortunately the new
passage led directly to Lancelot.

…And
Lancelot’s latest victim.

The
knight was standing over another body.  It looked like a gremlin.  The sharp
angles of its face were still locked in an expression of terror.  Avenant
hadn’t really considered his cousin a prime suspect for the murders that kept
cropping-up in the labyrinth, but there was no arguing with the evidence. 
Lancelot was literally ankle deep in blood.

Avenant
wasn’t sure whether to be pleased or not.

Either
way he didn’t have much choice.  Not with his True Love standing right there,
defenseless and small.  Avenant got to his feet, reaching for Belle’s arm. 
“Stay behind me, while I go kill this idiot.”

“Hang
on now, I didn’t do this.”  Lancelot proclaimed loudly, gesturing to the body. 
“He was already in pieces when I got here.  You’ve gotta believe me.”

“I
believe you.”  Avenant didn’t believe him.

“I’m
telling you, I’m innocent!  Lancelot insisted.  “I would never do something
this Bad.  This is the work of a monster.”  He glanced at Belle as if
realization had suddenly dawned.  “
He
did it!”  He pointed at Avenant. 
“Of course, he did.  I should’ve known.  He’s trying to set me up!”

Belle
shoved her way in front of Avenant.  “That’s a lie.  Avenant was with me the
entire night.”

Avenant
snorted.  “Don’t bother, Bella.  He’s just trying to deflect the blame so he
can steal the Icen Throne.  They don’t like to crown potential murderers. 
Believe me, I know.”

They
ignored him.

“Avenant’s
evil!”  Lancelot snapped.  “He probably used evil trickery to sneak away and evilly
slaughter this poor gremlin while your back was turned.”

“He
didn’t sneak anywhere.  He was right beside me.”

Lancelot
gasped in overacted horror.  “He was
beside
you?  You slept with the
Beast?  What kind of floozy would…?”  He stopped short as Avenant stepped
forward.  “Wait.”  Lancelot backed away as if braced for a blizzard to freeze
him solid at any moment.  Maybe the guy wasn’t such a lack wit, after all.  “Let’s
be reasonable.”

“You
think beasts give a shit about reasonable?”

“Belle,
talk to him!  You’re the only one he ever listens to.”

“My
True Love isn’t your biggest fan.”  Avenant snarled.  “Aside from the fact that
you’re a chauvinistic dickhead, you’re trying to steal the kingdom from her,
too.
”

“I
just want what’s mine!  I didn’t…”  Lancelot broke off, an amazed expression on
his face.  “Hold on.  She’s your True Love? 
You
get a True Love?”

“Belle’s
mine.”  Avenant confirmed.  “And neither of us likes you.”

“Avenant?” 
Belle grabbed hold of his arm, dragging him to a stop before he could take more
than two steps towards Lancelot.  “Don’t.”

The
woman and her soft heart drove him insane.  She always had endless compassion
for everyone except him.  “Why shouldn’t I destroy him?”  Avenant demanded. 
“Give me a reason.”

“Because
he’s your cousin.  Because it would be wrong to kill someone for killing
someone if he didn’t actually kill anyone.  Because he’s a jackass, but I don’t
think he deserves to die for it.”

“Exactly!” 
Lancelot agreed with a vigorous nod.  “Geez, anybody Good would know all that,
Avenant.  Even a woman.  This is why it’s only right that
I
be in charge
of the kingdom.”