Bared (24 page)

He pressed his chin against her head. “Cry, Cora” His chest heaved under her head before he added, “It’s all right to cry now that Aidan’s gone.”

His voice had softened, exuding a comfort that Cora hadn’t known she needed. As if his order told her to unleash the sadness that crippled her. She grasped his T-shirt, and a sob broke free from her chest.

Reality smacked into her like waves crashing and pulling her under. Her soul emptied
that she had caused this to happen. If she’d said nothing to Aidan, it would’ve been fine. Why did his touch have to remind her of how she used to feel? Why did she recognize the distance in the scene? And why couldn’t she have kept her mouth shut?

She’d known from day one he couldn’t love her and if she were ever honest about her feelings it would push him away. Aidan’s pain had destroyed him, but she’d slowly watched him come out of it.

Too see what Aidan looked like without restraint and distance brought hope. On their camping trip, he’d been carefree. There’d been no walls between, and maybe … just maybe … she thought he’d taken another step to leave his pain behind.

Perhaps she’d believed he realized how good they were together.

He’d made her laugh. He’d always made her feel like she was special. She adored that he always kept up with her sass. Deep down, Aidan was a good man who took care of the woman with him.

Why did she have to demand more than what he’d given her?

Now she had no part of him at all.

Hot tears rushed over her warm cheeks, and she couldn’t stop them. The worst thing of all, Aidan was drawn back into his pain. All she’d wanted—all she’d been trying to do—was help him see past it. She hated that she’d pushed him into such darkness. If she could go back and not say what she’d said to him in the cemetery, she would.

She’d take back so many things.

When her breath stopped hitching under her sobs, she managed, “I didn’t want this.”

Master Kyler hugged her tight. “I know, sweetie.”

She stared at the stone dungeon wall and clung to him. He didn’t seem to mind her tears dampening his T-shirt. She couldn’t get away from the horror of what Aidan was going through … 
all alone
.

No matter how warm Kyler’s arms were, they weren’t the arms she wanted wrapped around her, and she ached for Aidan. “Is he okay?”

“He’s fine,” Kyler said with a low, deadly edge. “No more talking about Aidan tonight. Close your eyes.” He squeezed his arms around her, as if he would never let go. “Think of this moment and that I don’t want to be anywhere else but with you.”

Chapter Twenty-four

Aidan entered Club Sin with one intent: Find Cora
.

He spotted her in the center of the dungeon, as if she’d been tonight’s entertainment. Spotlights beamed down on her, making her flesh glitter under the light. He glanced around the dimly lit club, seeing no one else in the dungeon
.

Odd, though he didn’t care
.

Cora had been bound to an office desk. Her legs were wrapped with crimson-colored ropes, so her thighs pressed against her torso. Then the rope ran down the desk legs and held firm. Her hands rested at each corner of the desk and her wrists were bound in a similar fashion to the front legs of the desk. Her long hair hung off the edge of the desk
.

Her beauty stole the air from Aidan’s lungs
.

“Waiting for me, luv,” he said, when he reached her
.

Her pretty eyes cut to his, so deep in arousal. “I’ve been waiting a long time for you, sir.”

He brushed her cheek, admiring how stunning she looked, restrained and awaiting anything he wanted. His to command, to pleasure. His to play with in the way he wanted. His to fuck. His to love
.

A tray rested next to the desk, containing only two nipple clamps and a bottle of lube. He hadn’t known who left it for him, but he took the invitation to enjoy a woman so perfect she left him breathless
.

He grabbed the nipple clamps, and then moved to her side. He squeezed her breast, massaging the heavy weight in his hand. Then he leaned over her and circled his tongue around her nipple before he sucked the bud deep into the roof of his mouth
.

With her nipple erect, he added the clamp, and Cora groaned as he tightened it, squeezing her nipple for sensation play. With the sparkling diamonds hanging off the clamp, she looked stunning
.

In fact, diamonds on Cora looked all too perfect
.

Without pause, he added the clamp onto the other breast. She arched, giving a soft moan as he secured it. Her breath grew raspy, her face flushing deep in color
.

Tonight he wouldn’t flog her. This wasn’t about her. This was about his wants and desires. His need to play with her as he desired and to satisfy his craving to own her. Tonight she would feel every inch of him
.

Normally he’d bring pleasure, then pain. But no, he’d bring pain with both the clamps and his cock. Tonight he’d play different. New expectations. New demands. All on his terms. With that erotic pain, he’d watch her morph that slight pain into pleasure
.

He’d ask that of her now
.

He wanted—no, demanded—more of her
.

Shedding his clothes, he dropped them to the ground. As the warm air in the dungeon and the silence drifted across him, he grabbed the lube off the tray. Then he coated his hard cock in a thin layer of the warm liquid
.

The shine glistened off the spotlight above him. His rock-hard cock was greedy to claim her. He kept his gaze transfixed on her as he settled at her bottom, which hung slightly off the edge of the desk
.

Her heart-shaped ass drew his focus. She was spread open, all of herself totally exposed to her. Her bottom was his for taking. Her body was his to possess. “Whose ass is this, Cora?” He rested his heavy cock against the puckered knot
.

“Yours, sir.”

He pressed the tip of his cock against her straining hole. “My ass to fuck, if I’d like to?”

Her breath became raspy, her pupils enlarged. “Yes, sir.”

Cora grunted as he pushed against her puckered hole. When he popped in through tight knots of muscle, she moaned. Aidan shifted his hips and added pressure, sliding deep inside her. She squeezed him, nearly crossing his eyes. He grunted, loving how much force he had to add—how pleasurable the squeeze of her muscles was around his shaft
.

Each shift he made forward, she pushed against him. Her low moans indicated the lack of pleasure at the moment, the burn she experienced at the stretch to accept him into her anus. He didn’t relent. She never said stop
.

He kept pushing deep inside her, as her tight muscles sent him tumbling into euphoria. When his pelvis pressed against her ass, he leaned down, cupping her face. “I’m sorry I’ve hurt you.” Pretty eyes, so lost in desire held his. “I don’t deserve you, Cora. I’ve crushed you.”

“I don’t need an apology, Aidan.” She gasped as he slid in and out of her bottom. “I’ve been strong for us both. Now I need you to love me.”

He groaned. She was treating his cock to a sensation so tight and favorable. “I’ll give you so much more, luv.”

The moment the words left his mouth, all sensation vanished. Cora was no longer beneath him and bound to the desk. The club looked dark and abandoned. His throbbing, heavy cock rested against the wood, as if he’d never been inside her
.

As if Cora had never been with him
.

His world shattered. Her absence he couldn’t endure. He nearly dropped to his knees and roared out his pain when a soft voice said, “Aidan.”

His heart hammered as he turned, and then the floor dropped from under him. Lily sat on the black leather couch by the dungeon’s door. Her long brown hair flowed along her shoulders. Her white dress settled over her crossed knee. She looked like his angel that had been taken away from him all too soon. His heart ached; his voice became thick in his throat. “Why are you here?”

“I’m watching you live again.” She smiled at him with twinkling light eyes. “Forgive yourself and be happy with her, Aidan.”

Aidan woke with a gasp and sat up straight in bed. His pulse raced and his cock throbbed beneath the bedsheets. The sun beamed through the window, showing dust along his cherrywood furniture.

He ran his hands over his face, exhaling a long breath. His mind spun with the wicked thoughts of his dream and of Lily watching the exchange.
What the fuck was that?

Dropping his hands from his damp, warm face, he scanned his empty bedroom, hearing nothing but silence. A fast burst of ice coursed through his veins, softening his cock. His thoughts of Cora, touching her and commanding her, consumed him.

Instead of doing that with her, he sat in his house all alone. His heart clenched. He had nothing—no Cora, no Lily—and yet he could have it all. Cora had bared her soul to him and had offered him her love.

Why was he refusing her?

Aidan ripped off the sheets and approached his walk-in closet next to the master bathroom. Once inside, he reached for the memory box on the top shelf of the wooden cabinets.
He dragged his feet along the hardwood floors and returned to his bed. The sun shone through the window next to him as he opened the box. His hands trembled as he took out the photo album containing memories with Lily.

He shut his eyes for a moment, gaining strength. Then he flipped the cover open to a picture of Lily in their backyard. He stared at her, a woman he had loved beyond anything he thought himself capable.

With Cora heavy on his mind, and with Lily’s voice in his ears, Aidan allowed himself to go deep into his soul. As if his past and present could no longer fight. The two women were woven into his life and had faced him in a dream.

He could no longer hide. Bringing Lily and Cora together had made him unable to run from the pain ripping him to shreds. He had lost Lily, but he couldn’t stand the thought of losing Cora, too.

Aidan knew he’d gotten past Lily’s death. His affection for Cora had brought him out of a dark place in his life. Her smile had soothed him. Her personality had made him laugh. She had brought him joy when he thought he couldn’t possibly be happy again.

At the cemetery with Cora, he’d known that he no longer mourned Lily. Of course he would always miss her. But he had accepted her death. Though something else had kept him shadowed in misery, something he had refused to deal with. Now he knew that avoidance had only made it worse. He brushed his finger over Lily’s cheek in the picture. “How do I fix this, Lily?”

She’s dead
, his mind told him.

She can’t answer you
, his heart bled.

Aidan had always listened to Lily’s advice. She’d always known how to fix everything. He needed someone to answer his spun-around thoughts. He needed to shed the darkness in his soul. Maybe he’d been too quiet about what he went through. Perhaps he’d dealt with his pain alone, which had been the wrong thing to do. Even more so, he thought for the first time, he needed to lean on others.

As a Dom, he wanted to portray strength.

As a man, he knew hiding his weaknesses had broken him.

He couldn’t outrun his
demons
. They had consumed him like poison in his veins. He’d become a man he couldn’t be proud of. One he couldn’t live with, and a man that would have
made Lily ashamed.

He hadn’t fought back.

He’d run.

Aidan might have said goodbye to Lily and accepted a life without her, but he hadn’t forgiven himself. He couldn’t begin to understand what he needed to do to make that happen. To admit his weakness broke the very foundation of his Dom instincts.

Though, maybe that’s exactly what he needed to do: admit that he had failed.

Aidan sighed, placing the photo album back into the box. He placed all his memories of Lily on the floor. He wouldn’t put those items back in the closet. It was time for him to face everything he’d ignored.

His muscles tensed as he reached for his phone on the nightstand. He texted Kyler,
You up?

Kyler’s reply came a second later:
It’s Saturday—why are you texting me this early?

Up for a climb?

Pick me up in twenty
.

Two hours later, Aidan took in a blue sky that didn’t have a cloud in sight. The air smelled clean and fresh, even if the dry humidity tightened his lungs. In the well-known climbing spot at Mount Charleston, the sandstone pressed against his chest as he climbed the rock face.

When he reached the next ledge, he clipped into the silver bolt. The climbing rope held snug as he maneuvered his way up the rock. Though his muscles burned and sweat covered his body, he welcomed the exertion.

Aidan needed to shed the angst invading him. His chest had never been so heavy and his head so murky. Squinting against the sun, he used the friction of his hand to hold his position. He examined his next move before he continued. Using his fingers, he gripped the rock above, and his legs bore most of his weight.

He paused, reaching the spot on the climb that called for a dynamic maneuver. A wide grin spread over his face. Adrenaline rushed like an energy drink into his body. He spotted the overhang above him, and he leaned against the rope, examining the rock.

Once he had the move well established in his mind, he pushed off with his feet and jumped, grabbing on to the overhang. With a grunt, his fingers wrapped around the pointed edge
and he held his breath, pulling himself up. Every muscle screamed in agony, forcing him to search deep and push past the pain.

When he reached the top of the rock face, he rolled over the edge. His heart pounded in his ears as he pushed off the ground. Then he anchored the rope into the bolt on top of the cliff. With wobbly legs and sweat coating his skin, he dropped onto the edge, dangling his feet over the rock face.