Back in Black (28 page)

Ben bristled. “Her name is Blythe, but don't jump to conclusions, Anna. I'm not in love with her. We're not some big, exclusive thing. I've only been seeing her for a little while.”

Anna breathed a little easier. “Is it serious?”

“No.”

“Could it get serious?” she pressed.

“Come with me,” Ben instructed.

“What?”

“Just come.” He took her arm and led her partway around the indoor observation deck until they reached a door that led outside. They went through it and onto a concrete platform that extended all the way around the tower. The air was fresh, the breeze fairly stiff. A high fence made the area completely safe.

“We needed a change of venue. For me to tell you that I cared about you more than I've ever cared about any girl. Don't you know that? God, Anna, I couldn't even stand the thought of not being with you. I was ready to blow off school to be with you.”

A flight of pigeons suddenly took off somewhere beneath their deck. Anna watched them wheel and turn against the afternoon sky. “True. But that's not love.”

“I don't think either one of us is in a position to lecture the other one on love, okay?”

She nodded. He was right. Sometimes she felt as if everything she'd learned about love had come from reading
Jane Eyre
; her personal experience was woefully lacking. Certainly her own parents were far from being role models. Evidently, so were Ben's.

“You think I liked seeing myself turn into some kind of love-struck asshole?” Ben continued. “I kept thinking, Don't be that guy. But I couldn't make myself forget you.” He turned away from her, staring out at the Strip below. “It took a long time, once I got back at school, for me to even like myself again.”

“I'm so sorry,” she whispered.

“I'm not blaming you, Anna, I did it to myself. You have to admit, you sent me some pretty mixed messages, too.”

“So … I guess neither of us knows anything about love.”

“At last, something we can agree on.” He wiped a hand across his forehead. “I do know this: It scares the shit out of me.”

“Me too,” Anna ventured.

“But I didn't come to Vegas to tell you that. And I didn't come just to hook up with you, either.” His gaze caught hers. “We have this thing, Anna. Something.” He laughed lightly. “Yeah, real articulate. What I'm saying is, I still want you.”

Anna wanted to throw her arms around him. She wanted to run away as fast as she could, too.

“Geez, give me a sign here,” Ben prompted. “I want us to try again. Do you?”

His right arm snaked around her slender waist, and she leaned into him, both of them gazing out at the endless view; bright lights, infinite possibilities. She was at least as scared as he was, that was a certainty. There was Blythe back at Princeton. There were no guarantees. They were alone in a city that neither of them knew. Just him, her, this moment, the truth.

“Yes,” Anna told him. “I do.”