B008IJW70G EBOK (23 page)

      And he hated it.

Archer had a grin on his face that Hunter was desperate to claw off. But he was doing his best to keep the tight line of his face frozen. To clench his teeth and force his breath in and out, slowly, like this conversation wasn’t annoying him one bit. 

      “So let me get this right.” Archer laughed, his shoulders shaking as he fought to speak again. “You try to maul her, take her down in the forest, then you just storm off never to be seen again.”

      Hunter nodded. 

      “And that’s it?” Archer asked.

      “There wasn’t much else I could do,” Hunter said through gritted teeth.      

      “Right.” 

      Hunter kept his anger in check again. It was much more convenient to be human right now, and if he let Archer get to him, his body was going to be screaming to go leopard. And for once he wasn’t entirely convinced he could control himself. 

      “And you’re not going back?”

      Hunter glared at his brother. After everything he’d told him, surely that much was obvious. 

      “Fool.” Archer muttered.

      “What did you say?”

      “Fool,” Archer repeated, louder this time, confidence boosting his voice. 

      Hunter couldn’t help himself. His head felt like it was going to explode. Fury, anger, raw energy shot through his body, his eyes burning like fire as he glared at his brother. 

      Archer was just as fast, exploding into his leopard as Hunter morphed. 

      Their cries echoed out across the field, screams of bloodlust that only egged them both on more. 

      Hunter revelled in the way his body burned as he changed then sprang through the air, going for his brother’s throat. But Archer was fast. Too fast. He pushed back and sent Hunter spiralling through the air, hurtling hard to the ground. 

      Ooomph. His rage only intensified as his body recoiled from being shoved. No one beat him.
Ever
. 

      But Archer was already waiting, lips curled back to show two rows of sharp, glistening white teeth. They wouldn’t kill one another, but they would sure as hell try. 

      
“You’re dead, Hunter. Dead meat, you hear me?”

      Hunter roared, his body trembling with the need to take blood. He didn’t have time to think. Archer was circling him, smiling at him. 

      His reaction was to lunge again, but once again he failed. Archer sunk his claws in, scratching his side. Hunter lunged again and managed to get his own back, but Archer was fast. 

      
“You’re weak, brother. Brought down by a fluffy little cat.” 

      Argh. His brain felt like it was going to explode.
“Don’t you ever speak about her like that.”

      That made Archer pounce again, catching him off guard. Hunter’s nostrils flared as they filled with the scent of his own blood. 

      
“Or what?”

      Hunter straightened, tried to gather himself, but his body just wasn’t responding. Wasn’t giving him back what he asked of it. 

      He leaped again and struck out, managing to flick his claws against Archer’s hide. 

      
“Or I kill you.”

      Archer snickered. Hunter heard it in his mind. Archer’s body rippled with humor as he stayed focus on the attack. 

      That was all Hunter needed. That flicker of laughter that told him Archer was unfocused, just temporarily. 

Hunter savoured the sublime shimmer of strength as it pumped through his body. His senses were back, his body primed for battle. His brother had caught him when his defences were down, when his mind had lost focus. But he wasn’t going to win this fight. Not a chance.

      He was Hunter Logan. Warrior. Highest ranking soldier in the leopard shifter army. 

      
“Tell me you love her.”

      Hunter let Archer get close enough to swipe him, make him think he was still below par as he questioned him. 

      “
No,”
he told his brother. 

      
“Tell me you love her, and I’ll let you live. Admit it.”

      Hunter drew back slightly, made Archer come closer, before he leaped through the air, all four feet airborne before he grabbed Archer by the throat and body slammed him into the ground. 

      Archer stayed still. The only movement was the rise and fall of his chest. 

      
“Surrender?”

      Hunter glared at Archer, his eyes trained on the shadowy pupils below him. He had pulled his teeth from the soft fur at Archer’s throat, but he still had all his weight concentrated on holding the leopard beneath him down. He wasn’t letting go, not yet. 

      “
Tell me you love her, Hunter. Tell me.”

      Hunter growled and bent to snap at Archer’s throat again. He had the power to kill him right now.
If he wanted to
. 

      But he was his brother. Hunter smacked Archer around the head with his paw, swatting him hard, before leaping off and pacing backward. He realized then that there was a crowd gathered, watching them. They were starting to part now, uninterested now the fight was over and no one had been killed. 

      
“You love her, Hunter. Don’t be an idiot.”

      He could have spun on his brother again, taken him down to quell the fury in his body. But it wasn’t worth it. Because as much as he didn’t want to admit it, Archer was right. 

      He locked eyes with Archer, watched him. They just stood there, bodies heaving, minds satisfied from the fight. From stretching their muscles and using up their energy. 

      
“Go back, Hunter.”

      His brother’s voice wasn’t teasing anymore. Or annoying. He was just speaking the truth, brother to brother, giving him the advice he’d come here seeking.

      
“Don’t be an idiot. Suck it up and go home.”

      Hunter blinked, slowed his breathing, then raised one paw to his brother. 

      He was glad he’d come here. He’d needed to see Archer. It had been too long since his last visit. But he didn’t know if he could listen to him. Not yet. He still felt too raw from what had happened. 

      
“Go home,”
Archer told him again.

      Hunter turned, padded past their torn clothes where they’d shifted, and headed into the trees. He didn’t want to go human. Besides, he didn’t have any clothes now anyway. 

      But Archer was right. He did love Riley, more than he could ever have imagined, and he already missed her. So much. 

      He felt terrible for what he’d done, but the truth was he
had
stopped himself in time. He could see that now. When any other male leopard vying to have her as his mate would have taken her down and forced her to submit. Played the alpha card. But he’d controlled himself as much as he could.

      Because he respected her. Cared for her. Wanted to be her equal. Wanted to know that if she chose him, it was of her own free will, for the right reasons. 

      He did need to go home. 

      But he wasn’t ready yet. 

CHAPTER NINETEEN

A day passed. Then another. Riley was starting to feel like a carved out lump of wood. Empty. Like something was missing from her body rather than just from her life. 

      It was like she’d fallen down a hole so deep that she could no longer make out the light above. As if her body was still working, functioning, but her mind was trapped down there. Unable to escape. A deep black hole that was sucking the life from her, twisting her insides, torturing her mind with images of what should have happened. Of what she should have said before he left. Of what she should have done. 

      Hunter had been her only constant here. She hadn’t realized how much she’d come to rely on him. How seeing him standing, waiting for her each morning, had made her feel. 

      She knew now.
Hell
, did she know now. And she hated it here without him. 

      Sophia was giving her space, but Riley guessed she knew what had happened. How could she not? Sophia ruled the pack, the entire area, she would know precisely why Hunter had stopped coming over. 

      But that didn’t help. Nothing helped. 

      Not the book she was trying to lose herself in. Not the music she’d been blasting through her ears. Not the sweet smell of her horse or the feeling of his coat beneath her hands. 

      She was starting to think it was time to go back home. Without Hunter, what did she have? A heart that felt like it had been ripped into a million tiny pieces. A mind that could picture nothing but his long, lean frame. And senses that were filled with him. With the smell of him, the sight of him, the feel of him when she wrapped her arms around him on the back of his Harley. 

      But she had to stay, no matter what. For Claudia. For Sophia. But most importantly for Claudia. She’d fallen in love with Hunter, but Claudia was her sister. She couldn’t let her down, but then she couldn’t imagine facing the pain of being here every day without Hunter either. And staying here meant she’d one day need a mate.

      “Riley?”

      She jumped at Sophia’s voice. “In here,” she called back. 

      Her bedroom door opened, just a crack. “Mind if I come in?”

      She smiled back and rocked her body up in to a sitting position. It wasn’t easy, pretending like she was okay, but she didn’t want pity or sympathy. 

      “Riley, I thought maybe you might like to meet some of the other leopards. If you’re ready, that is?”

      She knew where this was coming from, why Sophia wanted her to meet the other leopards. Her tongue was like a lump of meat in her mouth, but Riley forced it to work. She had the right to say no. For now at least.

      “I’ve met some of them already.” 

      The look Sophia gave her told her she knew that already, that it didn’t count. She wanted her to meet the ones Hunter had been keeping her away from. The ones Hunter had fought for her. Had left bleeding when they tried to make a play at her. Them and the more senior soldiers in the area.

      “He’s not coming back, is he?”

      The flicker in Sophia’s eyes told her she was right. Sophia wasn’t going to come out and say it, but the look on her face told her all she needed to know. 

      Tears pricked at her pupils again, her throat filled with hot, burning saliva. Made her want to vomit.
Hunter was gone
. She’d pushed him away, and now he was gone for good. 

      “Are you sure?” She had to ask. 

      Sophia nodded. “He’s been seen in North California, where his brother is stationed. My guider saw him. I’ve had her watching for him to see where he went.”

      She tried to nod but her head ached so bad she had to stop. Weren’t they meant to be destined for one another? Hadn’t their future been predetermined? What about all the soul mate stuff Sophia had tried to sell her? Did that all mean nothing now?

      “My answer is no,” she said.

      Riley had expected a lecture, a telling off, questions even, but the silence was even worse. Sophia patted her hand before rising. It was the most grandmotherly thing she’d ever done to her, besides holding her the day she’d first arrived. Up until now, she’d kind of thought of her more like a friend, but now that she needed a grandma she was here for her. 

      “I can’t meet anyone else, Sophia. I…” She couldn’t continue the sentence.

      “I know, honey.” She sighed. “Believe me, I know.”

      “Will he join the army again? Stay away for good?”

      Sophia looked unsure. Or maybe just unsure of what to tell her. 

      “Hunter started serving in our armed forces as a very young teenager. He is by far the best we’ve ever seen. But his role is to protect us closer to home. To…” her voice trailed off. “We all hope he’ll return.”

      Riley simply nodded. What else was there to do? Nothing she said or did was going to help. 

      Sophia’s words had ignited a flicker of hope within her though, that he might come back, if only to protect and serve his pack. But he wasn’t coming home for her. She knew that. And wasn’t she better off without him in her life at all if they couldn’t be together?

      Riley waited until the door had closed before curling into a ball, tucking her knees up to her chin. Her body started to shudder, sobs making her gasp for air, tears stinging, and her body ached. Just when she’d thought she couldn’t grieve any longer, her mind and body failed her. 

      Every day, flickers of every conversation they’d ever had, played through her mind like a DVD on repeat. On fast forward. Flashing at her, taunting her. 

      Just because she hadn’t been ready to tell Hunter
yes
before their last day together, didn’t mean she hadn’t been about to. She loved him. Deep down, she had known that from… when? She’d been attracted to him on first sight, liked him from their first conversation, been infuriated with him the day she’d first changed, and fallen in love with him somewhere in between. 

      Now he’d gone forever. Given up on her because, just once, he hadn’t been able to control his animal instincts. 

      Riley shut her eyes and willed sleep to find her. Anything but the empty, nagging pain pulling at her insides right now. Twisting her gut. If she’d said yes to him earlier, bound herself to him, he wouldn’t have had the chance to lose control and leave. 

      Riley just wanted to sleep. To make it all go away. But Sophia’s question kept echoing in her mind. Tugging her memory. When she’d asked her if she wanted to meet other pack members, it meant she was anxious for her to take a mate.

      Young male leopards, other shifters like her, available to her now that Hunter was gone.

      Riley suppressed the urge to wail and tucked deeper into her ball. 

      Sleep. Please, sleep.