At His Throat, a Promise (42 page)

He made up his mind just as Fen turned the light off. He would just ask Jin not to say anything to Nell about him. If she didn"t listen… he"d tell her he didn"t want to hear anything she had to say about the other household.

His sleep was broken.

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AT HIS THROAT, A PROMISE

Harte was rubbing his erection against Ellis"s ass again.

Honestly, the boy was a hazard. There was no escaping him—not that Ellis wanted to.

He pressed back into the feeling, enjoying the subtle curls of desire spreading throughout his body. It was a nice way to wake up. The only room for improvement was that William was missing.

That was to be expected, though. William almost always woke up before his slaves.

Harte reached over Ellis"s hip and gripped his erection. His hand was callused, which made Ellis wonder what he had gotten into the day before; his hands were normally so soft.

His hips moved against the prick rubbing between his cheeks.

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He knew Harte had no real desire to fuck him—just
get
fucked by him—but the tease was nice. Subtle, for Harte, if a cock on his ass could ever be called thus. Usually Harte would have made sure Ellis was awake, demanding attention and reciprocation. Actually, Harte would normally have been in front of Ellis, moving his hips so Ellis was between his cheeks.

This was all wrong.

Ellis gasped and jerked away, nearly into the wall as the bed was so small and Fen took up a lot of room. “What are you doing?” he hissed, panicking.

“Relax, Master"s gone. Look.” Fen reached over and yanked the curtain open. Ellis dived under the covers, determined to not be seen.

“Seriously, kid, the car"s gone. I heard him leave like an hour ago. And he"s never
not
gone on Sundays. There"s nothing to worry about.”

“Why?” Ellis groaned from beneath the sheets. “Why would you do this? I have to tell him!”

“What?” Fen snapped. He tugged the sheets back and glared at Ellis. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“I"m a good slave,” Ellis said. “I broke the rules and I have to tell him.”

“The fuck you do! Do you have
any
idea what he"ll do to you?

Any fucking clue? And
me?
Listen, I know you don"t give a shit about me and nor should you, but he will beat me so bad… ” Ellis felt like a door closed in his heart. He couldn"t continue on like this. He wasn"t strong enough. All the pain on the surface all the time, all the memories just waiting to show him what he couldn"t have. It was too
hard
.

“I won"t say anything,” he said. He was resigned but 363

AT HIS THROAT, A PROMISE

determined. “But if you ever do it again, I won"t hesitate. I"m not here for you. And you know what? Just… don"t talk to me at all.

You"re really nice and funny and I"m sure you don"t mean to be bad, but I need to do this. So just… pretend I don"t exist.” Fen sighed. He made no move to leave the bed, but at least he wasn"t touching Ellis. “I recognise this,” he said. “I"ve been there.

You think pretending you"re not a real person will make the pain go away? You think ignoring everything in equal measures, whether it hurts or feels good, will be the answer?
They will break
you.
”

Bend, don’t break
.

Ellis punched the wall, sharp pain focusing his resolve. “Leave me alone,” he said quietly. His hand was throbbing but it was
nothing
compared to what was happening inside him.

“Don"t disappear on me, kid. You"re too good for that. And slaves who come out broken? They never get fixed.”
Don’t let him ruin you.

“Stop.”

Fen left and went into the bathroom. Ellis got out of bed, making it after himself. He pulled the sheets taut; the neater the bed, the better the slave. He could do this.

He waited at his desk with his shower things while Fen finished up. When the other slave came back into the room, he gave Ellis a long, searching stare. Whatever he saw made him shake his head in disappointment. Ellis didn"t care. He barely knew the slave. Why would it matter to him what Fen thought?

He

showered

and

cleaned

himself

with

newfound

determination. When he was finished, Fen was gone. Ellis began to copy out his notes, knowing it was what Master would want him to do. Master was, after all, a very orderly person.

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AT HIS THROAT, A PROMISE

When the bell rang for breakfast time, Ellis ate quietly and spoke to no one. Jin, the cook, tried to get him to stay behind and talk, but Ellis just ignored her. It hurt, being so rude. It wasn"t what he was used to, and he"d made a point to never intentionally hurt another person"s feelings. But he needed them all to get the point quickly: he wasn"t going to be spoken to. He was here to learn and serve, and anything that didn"t fall under those headlines was something in which he had no interest.

He stayed in his room the entire day, except for when the bell chimed for lunch and dinner. Then he went and ate in silence, ignoring the cattiness of the girls, the concern of the servants, and the heavy presence of Fen, who seemed to be simultaneously ignoring and watching him.

After noticing he wasn"t going to rise to the bait, Maya and Michaela backed off, talking together. It was clear they cared about each other very much. Maybe even loved each other. How was it that no one had told Master about this relationship? Did Master not care? Did he make an exception for them? Could he and Fen have maintained the same sort of liaison?

Ellis knew, however, that he didn"t want that. Not with Fen.

Maybe never again.

When Master came home late that evening, Ellis made it clear through body language that he needed to speak with him. He was lucky that Master was in tune with that sort of behaviour, because right away he noticed and told Ellis to wait for him in the black room.

The black room was one that Maya had absolutely relished showing him. It was named that because heavy black curtains hung along every wall and the carpet was black as well. It had a womb-like atmosphere, almost claustrophobic. It wasn"t very large, but 365

AT HIS THROAT, A PROMISE

then Master didn"t use accoutrements like William did. He used his hands and feet and cock, according to Fen.

Ellis knelt, head down and hands gripping his elbows behind his back in Master"s preferred supplicant position. As he waited, he let his mind clear, all thoughts of punishment flowing outward, replaced by thoughts of making Master proud, making him call Ellis good again.

His breathing was deep and trance-like when Master finally entered. Ellis couldn"t be sure how much time had passed. He felt tired, but his body was energised.

“What is wrong, Ellis?” Master said kindly. He sat in the only piece of furniture in the room: an overstuffed leather armchair, the scent of which reminded Ellis of paddles and floggers and William"s study…

Ellis held out the cock cage, keeping his head down.

Taking it from him, Master was quiet for a long time. “And what is this?” His voice was cold.

“It"s a cage, Master. It was a gift and I brought it with me. I"m very sorry.”

Master sighed and tapped a fingernail against the metal. “I did not say you were not to bring anything like this with you, did I?” Ellis shook his head.

“And yet you knew it was wrong even though you did not have orders against it. That is very good, Ellis. I am proud of you.” Sighing with relief and swelling with pride, Ellis nodded.

“I will, however, have to punish you. As you know, it was wrong to bring this. You do not object, do you?” Shaking his head quickly, Ellis let his eyes fall closed. He hoped Master was merciless. He felt guilt for not telling him that Fen had been in his bed, touching him. That he had liked it. Master 366

AT HIS THROAT, A PROMISE

should know those things. Ellis was going to take this beating as absolution for something Master knew nothing about. Maybe that was wrong—cheating—but Ellis had promised Fen he wouldn"t tell. True to his request, Fen had not tried to speak to him again, so no harm had really been done.

“Stand up.”

Ellis did, keeping his hands gripped on his elbows. They felt sharp. He squeezed tighter, nails digging in.

There was only a split second to prepare himself, and Ellis chose not to use it. Master reared back and slapped Ellis hard enough that he fell to the side. He didn"t put his hands out to catch himself and landed hard on his hip.

“Again.”

Getting to his feet without the use of his hands was difficult, but he did it. His hip was throbbing, not to mention the burning heat on his face.

Master slapped him again; Ellis managed to stay on his feet, but only just. The pain didn"t start until after he righted himself, and then it roared through his face with the pounding of his pulse.

He gasped and panted through the sensation. He nodded his thanks at Master, getting into position again.

Master didn"t continue the punishment. He must not have thought Ellis was as bad as Ellis did. Master took him into his arms and held him for a moment, a hand on his head.

“Good boy.” He sat back in his armchair and sighed.

Watching him from beneath his hair, Ellis caught the two-finger crooking signal and quickly dropped to his knees.

Remembering that using his hands was permitted, he detached them from his elbows, surprised to see blood beneath his fingernails.

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AT HIS THROAT, A PROMISE

He looked up quickly to see if Master had noticed, but his head had dropped back against the seat.

Freeing Master"s cock, Ellis quickly set about getting him off.

Master tasted better now, for some reason. More fulfilling. Ellis tightened his lips around the head and let his mouth fill with saliva.

The cock slid easily through his mouth, and Master gave a moan of appreciation. Using his hands all over Master"s cock and balls, Ellis guided him deeper into his mouth, breathing through his nose and trying to swallow around the thick length. He knew he"d done it correctly when he heard Master"s fingernails digging into the leather on the armrests.

Ellis continued to swallow Master"s cock until it thickened. He pulled back a bit to avoid choking and let the come splash into his mouth. He held it as he pulled away, swallowing only when he knew Master could see him do it.

Master"s hand came down again on the top of his head. Ellis allowed himself a little smile. It was nice to be good, to do well, to be pleasing.

Bend.

Master patted his cheek and stood, buttoning himself back into his trousers and walking out of the room. He left the door open, but Ellis rather liked it in the black room. He felt safe. His lips were sore, his throat scratchy, his knees and hip aching, and his face a veritable pounding centre of pain, but he felt okay.

He felt fine.

Don’t break.

* * *

AT HIS THROAT, A PROMISE

disappointment.

Heart constricting, Ellis made his way to the room, assuming the position and mentally chastising himself for his horrible habits.

“I know you cannot help being sick. It is a natural part of life.

But we must not sniffle at the table, must we?
Especially
after we are told not to.”

Tears slipped from Ellis"s eyes. He"d been
so good
. Since his first punishment three weeks ago, there had only been six more.

Even the girls were punished more than that.

“Ah, ah, do not cry. That is a weakness in slaves. Stoicism is your strength; do not lose it. Stand.”

The first blow took his breath away. His hands came out automatically, and he cursed himself that weakness, too. He
was
weak. He deserved that sharp pain in his wrist from landing funny.

He deserved the swelling in his cheek. Master wouldn"t have punched him if he didn"t think Ellis couldn"t learn from it.

The urge to sniff was intensified now that his nose was filled with blood
and
mucous. He resisted the urge and stood for the second blow.

Only two.
Better
. Not good enough.

Two fingers beckoned him, and Ellis knelt. The blood in his mouth was stickier than spit, but Master didn"t seem to mind.

When he took the cock into his throat, he didn"t gag, but he was suffocating. Still, he forced it deeper, taking it until his vision blurred. Ignoring that, he focused on Master.

When he came, Ellis swallowed the mess of fluids in his mouth and smiled gratefully, not knowing that his teeth were red with blood. He didn"t spill a drop.

“Good boy.”

Ruin.

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AT HIS THROAT, A PROMISE

* * *

Especially one like Ellis, who obviously hadn"t learned everything he needed to? What could he possibly learn from Fen? Oh, law, certainly. Fen was nigh on a genius when it came to his chosen profession.

About submission, though, Fen knew nothing. He was a fraud.

He pretended to submit to
get through
. Ellis didn"t
get through
. He
was
submission. He
personified
it. It was his entire life.

He didn"t have to worry, though. Master had absolutely no intentions of giving Ellis up. Not when he was so close, as Master kept saying.

So close.
What then? What happened when he arrived at whatever he was close to?

He just wouldn"t think about that.

A part of him missed Fen. He"d shared a room with the slave for nearly three months, after all. Granted, he hadn"t actually spoken to him almost the entire time except when absolutely necessary, which he knew was torture for Fen as he regularly told Ellis so.

Which was why Ellis had no idea why Fen would want him.