Armed and Fabulous (Lexi Graves Mysteries) (12 page)

"She does not believe
we're working," I said
as I returned to my bedroom closet
. I
rifl
ed
through to find the low
-
heeled
,
pink
,
peep-toe pumps
I wanted
, my eyes ready for any strange wires or bomb
-
shaped objects
.
I found the pumps
shoved in a protective
plastic
box at the back of the closet.

"
That
reminds me, you need to read the files."

"But there's loads," I pointed out. "It will take me all night to read them and I can hardly take them to my parents'."

"Skim through them
later
. You can read the rest over the weekend."

"Thanks. And,
Adam?"

“Yeah?”

"I really can do this. I won't let you down."

~

Lily has
seriously questionable taste in music, but seeing as she was driving, I didn't have a choice. Several Celine Dion tracks later, we turned onto my parents' street, sliding into a space right outside the house.

My parents had lived in the same house throughout my life and it a
lways looked
unchanged
. The colo
rs were my mother's choice,
white
siding
with
yellow trim. My mother thought it looked like a daisy; I thought it resembled an egg. Out front, the house had a neat lawn
,
edged with rose bushes
and
surrounded by
the smartest picket fence in Montgomery.

Five children had grown up in this house
;
five kids skinned their knees racing bicycles on the street outside
.
F
our of us
had
favored a quick exit out
of
t
he bathroom window to escape
via the porch roof,
and
only three of us had ever been caught. Three of the five
grew
up in my father's footsteps to become cops
.
O
ne graduated sum cum laude from Harvard and became an accountant
.
A
nd one of the Graves' offspring
earned
an okay degree,
had
a flirtation with the
A
rmy
,
and
eventually,
found
a career that sucked. Guess which one I was.

But before nostalgia could hit me harder than the rumor of a designer sample sale, I locked
my
eyes on the shiny
,
black Mercedes parked further down the street.
It belonged to my sister
,
Serena. I
f we were really, really lucky, her husband, Ted
Whitman the
T
hird
, would be with her. Oh, happy, happy day.

"I didn't know Serena
was coming tonight," said Lily, without enthusiasm.

"Me neither."

"You know
,
I have a bottle of vodka in my bag. We could play a drinking game where every time Serena name drops
or
rags on someone
, we take a shot."

"We'll be drunk in minutes," I replied, a spark of hope
igniting
the evening. At least with Lily
beside
me, putting up with
the
perfect Serena wouldn't be so bad, but I
still
had to ask the obvious, "Why do you have a bottle of vodka in your bag?"

"Seemed like a good idea," said Lily
, grinning
. Before we'd even closed the car doors, the front door opened and Serena
tapped
her foot
impatiently
as she
blocked
the
entrance
while we walked along the path
.

"Alexandra," she sighed. "Lily. How nice."

"Serena." I dropped a kiss on her proffered cheek. "And it's still Lexi." Oh, the conversation that never got old. Serena was five years older than
I
, the only girl for years until our mother accidentally got pregnant, resulting in little
,
ol' me. I think it stuck in Serena's craw that not only was she no longer the only girl
,
in a
basket
of boys, but she also had
to compete
for attention.
Consequently,
that just seemed to make her aim for, what would be to mere mortals, stupendously unachievable
goals, but which
she
nonetheless
always
attain
ed
. Top university? Check. High flying job
?
Check
.
Closet full of designer clothes and a perfect figure
?
Check. Husband by thirty? Check.
Gorgeous house with its own gym?
Check, effing, check.

"Can't believe you're forty this year!" squealed Lily as she threw her arms around my sister's stiff neck
.
I sniggered because age was the one thing Serena had
on me
and didn't want.

"I'm not," sniffed Serena. "I'm only thirty
-
four.
” The formal façade slipped back on
to
her face. “
Come through. The folks are in the living room."

"Is Ted here?" I asked
,
pausing to trace
the
crude
shamrock
with a finger
. It was
a testament to our Irish heritage,
and
had been
carved in the doorjamb at some point in our childhood
. Ted
Whitman the
T
hird
was about as
much
fun as Serena. They had been married for six years, but I'd never had
any
cause to hang out with them. Serena was too perfect for me, and I was too, well, embarrassing to hang out
with
, according to Serena
. She
only ever invited me to their house with strict conditions attached
,
which was fine by me as I preferred to
get
in and out in thirty minutes flat.

"Of course."

"Yay," said Lily
flatly
, giving me a poke in the ribs and pulling a face as Serena turned her back.

"
I'm glad you're here,” Serena said. Lily raised her eyebrows
at
me. I shrugged: news to me. “W
e h
ave an important announcement
. It'll be nice to catch up. I'm sure Mom
and Dad are dying to know what’
s new in your life too."

Lily stuck her tongue out.
I pulled a face right back at Lily as Serena strode away, her
heels
making little clip
-
clop noises on the wooden floor before
they
got muffled by the rug. Serena was
uncharacteristica
lly
jovial. I mouthed
,
“
W
hat's got into her
?
”
But Lily just shrugged.

"Come on," she said, grabbing my arm. "Maybe she's moving to Argentina."

The Argentineans should be so lucky.

As we entered,
Ted was in the middle of a story that made Dad discreetly yawn into a tumbler of whiskey. You would have thought I was Santa
bearing
presents the way he
launched
himself across the room, wrapping me
up
in a bear hug. In my ear
,
he whispered, "Do you need to go somewhere urgently? Fishbone in the throat, perhaps? Emergency appendectomy? Is that your cell phone ringing with Lily
reporting that
a pipe burst in your apartment?"

Lily s
queezed into the doorway. "Hi!
"
she said
, beaming, and Dad sighed, moving to embrace her to
o
, repeating the same thing in her ear as she giggled.

I waved to my
older
brother, Jord,
the youngest of the boys. He
took a moment to turn from Ted, wave at me
,
and look Lily over from head to toe, winking at her before turning away
,
and
frowning at whatever Ted was droning on about
.

"Hello
,
Officer Tasty,"
whispered
Lily under her breath
. Her crush on Jord started in high s
chool and ha
d never
waned
. They flirted
,
but
never went any further
.
D
espite Jord's reputation as a skirt chaser, he knew better than to start something with Lily
,
only to
ditch her. None of us would put up with that. It had been suggested
more than once that
we might even prefer Li
ly
to
him
, but those reports were uncon
firmed.