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Authors: Gary Jonas

Tags: #Urban Fantasy

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BOOK: Anubis Nights
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He handed a print to each of us. We studied the image for a moment then folded the pictures and tucked them away in our pockets or, in Rayna’s case, in her purse.

Chronos rose and dug in his pocket. He pulled out what looked like two pairs of earrings and two wicked-looking metallic double-pronged fish hooks. He handed a pair of earrings to Kelly and another pair to me. “Wear these earrings because we had a magician cast a spell on them to automatically translate language for you. If you aren’t wearing them, you won’t be able to understand what anyone says to you.”

“I don’t have pierced ears,” I said.

“You will in a bit,” Sharon said.

“Great.” I put the earrings in the right front pocket of my blue jeans.

Chronos approached Kelly. “Lean your head back, and open your mouth as wide as you can,” he said.

She looked at him for a moment then did as he said.

He took one of those hooks and jammed it into the roof of Kelly’s mouth. Kelly doesn’t feel pain, so it wasn’t a big deal to her, though her eyes told a different story. I guessed it was the guy sticking his fingers into her mouth that bothered her, though.

He finished with her and walked over to me. “Your turn,” he said. “Fair warning. This is going to hurt.”

“What is that?”

“It’s a hook, but it will translate your speech so the Egyptians will be able to understand you. The magic is in the hook, so it will work for you too.”

“Can’t you just cast a spell on an amulet? Egyptians wore a lot of amulets, right?”

“We could but with this, you don’t need to keep track of an amulet.”

“What’s to keep track of? You put it around your neck and you’re done.”

“Unless it comes off and you lose it.”

“I’ll take that chance.”

“Sorry, we don’t have an amulet prepared for that, so you get the implant.”

“Fine,” I said. “Are you going to wash your hands first?”

He rolled his eyes.

It was a fair question. I didn’t know where his hands had been. I leaned my head back and opened my mouth, and the guy jammed that hook into the roof of my mouth. The pain was intense. I clenched my fists and tensed every muscle in my body as he jiggled that thing around, clipping it to the bone.

When he took his fingers out of my mouth, I wanted to punch him, but Rayna gently patted my arm. “Be cool,” she said.

“That really hurt,” I said.

“Don’t be a baby,” Kelly said.

I probed at the hook with my tongue. That hurt a lot, but the damn thing was like a loose tooth, so my tongue kept right on probing it every few minutes.

“Now the ears,” Chronos said.

Kelly didn’t have pierced ears either, so she went first. Chronos did the honors. When Kelly was done, I sat down and let Chronos pierce my ears too. That didn’t hurt as bad as the implant. The earrings were small, so we put them on.

Sharon reached down, picked up the gym bag, and set it on the chair next to me. She unzipped it, reached inside, and pulled out several packs of clothing. She dropped one on my lap then tossed one to Rayna, one to Kelly, and one to Brand. “Go get changed. You shouldn’t go back in modern clothing.”


 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER FOUR

 

 

KELLY CHAN

 


 

—protect him.

I stood in the locker room, trying to figure out how to wear the pieces of material Sharon had given me. Rayna wore a nice dress, which was a lot easier to deal with than this. I put on the first thing, which was some sort of sheath dress, but the straps left my breasts uncovered. I wasn’t sure I’d put it on correctly, so I removed it and tried the next article of cloth. I could wrap it around me like a towel, but that didn’t seem right and restricted my movement too much. I shook my head, sat down, and started writing in my journal.

“What are you writing?” Rayna asked.

“Jonathan asked me to keep a journal, but I hate doing it.” I tore out several pages, crumpled them up, and tossed them at the trash can on the other side of the small locker room. The ball of paper hit the rim and bounced out, rolling across the floor.

“You all right?” Rayna asked as she picked up the paper and dropped it into the trash can.

“I have plenty of time before basketball season starts,” I said, stealing a line Jonathan uses whenever he misses.

“I wasn’t talking about the basket.”

I sighed. “They healed me as much as they could. Magic has its limits. I’ll be fine.”

“Oh, that’s not what I meant either. I was talking about the clothes.”

“I’ll figure them out, or Sharon can show me.”

“Are you up for this? We can trade clothes, and I can go to Egypt instead.”

“How much do you know about ancient Egypt?”

“How much do I know about the Roaring Twenties? I can’t even talk to Esther to get pointers.”

“I suspect Sharon chose who to send where for a reason.”

“She doesn’t know me.”

“But she does know me,” I said.

“Point taken but if she knew you weren’t completely healed, would she make the same choice?”

“I may not be a hundred percent, but I’m still a Sekutar.”

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Yes, you did.”

“Well, maybe a little but you’re right. You’re still the best fighter here.”

I nodded.

“You want me to send Sharon in to help you with the clothes?”

“Please.”

“Consider it done.” Rayna opened the door to leave then looked back. “Out of curiosity, how much do you know about ancient Egypt?”

I smiled. “Just some basic things. I saw a documentary about Hatshepsut, I read a book about Egypt a few years ago, and I saw some artifacts in a museum once.”

“That’s what I thought.”

 

JONATHAN SHADE

 

Rayna looked nice in her dress with an overcoat draped over her forearm. I hadn’t seen her wear lipstick in two months. When her brother died, she stopped doing fancy dinners and fund-raisers. Hobnobbing with the rich and famous wasn’t really her thing. She much preferred helping people get in shape at The Steam Room. I walked up to her and whispered in her ear, “You look like a million bucks in 1920s money.”

She looked at me and grinned. “And you need to lay off the doughnuts.”

I wore a white kilt-looking thing with brown sandals. I looked down at my stomach. I hadn’t worked out as much as usual in the past few months, so I wasn’t sporting a six-pack, but I wasn’t sporting a muffin top either. “What do you mean?” I asked.

She poked me in the gut with her forefinger then gave me a quick kiss. “I’m teasing. Don’t be so sensitive.”

“I wish we were going to the same time,” I said.

She gazed into my eyes, and her smile faded. “Me too.”

I wrapped my arms around her, and we held each other tightly. “It won’t take that long,” I said.

“Oh,” Rayna said. “I need to make a phone call.”

“Okay. What for?”

“Someone needs to take care of Clara while we’re gone.”

Clara was Rayna’s dragon. Don’t ask.

“If we don’t succeed, it won’t matter,” I said. “If we do succeed, we’ll be back later today. The time delay is only due to the link we’ll have in the past. We’ll live through however long it takes, but we should still come back to today.”

“You don’t know that.”

Having done a bit of time travel, I felt I did know that. Rayna knew the truth, while nobody else did. Still, I didn’t really know. She could be right.

She took out her cell phone and scrolled through the names. “Who here can take care of a dragon?” she wondered aloud.

“Someone with a massive pooper scooper,” I said.

She grinned and swatted at me then turned away to make her call.

Brand walked out in brown trousers, cowboy boots, and a beige button-down shirt. He had a brown jacket in one hand. “Don’t I get a gun?” he asked.

Sharon was sitting on one of the chairs in the circle. She shook her head. “Do you own a Colt Peacemaker from the 1800s?”

“No.”

“Neither do I. You’ll have to buy one when you get there. You’ll find plenty of money in your trouser pocket. You’ll also want to buy some clothes for Jonathan and Kelly when you get there. When they come forward, they won’t blend in wearing a kilt or a dress of Egyptian style.” She looked around. “Where’s Kelly?”

Rayna pointed to the locker room. “She’s trying to figure out the Egyptian clothes. Maybe you should go help her.”

Sharon nodded. She looked me up and down. “Your kilt isn’t wrapped correctly. I can see you’re wearing boxer briefs. You’ll want to take those off now. They didn’t have underwear in ancient Egypt.”

“But this kilt can easily ride up, and I’ll be flashing everyone if I go commando.”

Sharon shook her head. “Egyptians didn’t have hang-ups about sex or genitalia. In fact, many workers didn’t bother to wear clothing when they were out in the fields. Lose the underwear.”

“Hell,” Brand said. “I’d love to go to ancient Egypt. I could walk around with my dick out all day long. It would wave to the ladies.”

“Good thing you’re going to the old west, then,” I said. I pulled off my underwear and carried it back to the men’s room. As I walked back to Rayna, who had finished her call, I kept adjusting the kilt, trying to keep it from exposing me too much.

Rayna laughed. “Your balls are showing.”

“Yeah, thanks for that.” I twisted on the kilt, and the damn thing came right off.

“Dude!” Brand said, covering his eyes. “I don’t need to see that.”

Chronos watched all of this from where he sat. He closed his eyes, shook his head, and pointed to the men’s room. “Go on in there, and I’ll show you how to wrap the kilt.”

 

KELLY CHAN

 

Sharon came into the locker room. “I understand you’re having some difficulties.”

“I didn’t sign up to be a Vegas showgirl,” I said. “These straps don’t allow for any modesty.”

“Nudity wasn’t a big deal back then. Women walked around bare chested or with one breast exposed in many cases.”

“I’d rather not do that.”

“Because you have small breasts?”

“No. I’m just more modest than that.”

“You’ll need to blend in.”

“I’m clearly not Egyptian, so I’m not going to blend in. Can’t I just wear ancient Chinese clothing?”

“You will be wearing an amulet. That amulet will cast a spell to make you look Egyptian.”

“What about Jonathan?”

“The amulet won’t work on him, so he’ll be a foreigner.”

“If the magic is in the amulet, it should work to make others see him differently.”

Sharon sighed. “You may be right, but it’s a moot point because I didn’t prepare an amulet for him.”

“I guess he can pretend to be Jewish, though he doesn’t look the part. They had Jewish people in Egypt, right? I mean, the Bible talks about it in Genesis and Exodus.”

“I’ve never been to ancient Egypt myself. At that time I was in the Underworld, ferrying souls from an alternate dimension. However, in my studies, I’ve found no historical evidence to show anything definitive about Jewish people in Egypt until the time of Ptolemy. I’m sure there were some, of course, but the Egyptians don’t mention them.”

I let Sharon help wrap the material around me. It left my right breast exposed.

“You said we were going to have me covered.”

“No, I said you needed to blend in.”

I shook my head. “Unreal.”

“We’re running out of time. Let’s get back out there. We need to send you through before the doorway closes. Will you be able to duplicate the dress as I’ve shown you?”

“Yes.”

“Excellent. Let’s go.”

I shook my head again but followed her out onto the main floor.

 

JONATHAN SHADE

 

Chronos tried to teach me to wrap the kilt. When he did it, the kilt would stay on. When I wrapped it, I would be exposed as I walked.

“This is not a big deal,” Chronos said.

“Don’t say it’s not a big deal when you’re talking about my junk. In fact, I don’t want you talking about my junk. Understand?”

“I was not referring to your . . . junk, though you have a very nice penis.”

“Come on, man. You’re as old as time, so you should know better than to say things like that.”

“Through much of history, men have been bisexual.”

“Whatever gets you through the night, but I’m for women only.”

“Charon didn’t mention you were so small-minded.”

I laughed. “Are you hitting on me?”

“If we had time, I would be.”

“I’m flattered but that’s not my scene.”

“Your loss,” he said. “Let’s go. Time is growing short.”

“Don’t say short when you’re looking at my junk.”

That time he grinned.

We returned to the main training area of the dojo, and as I walked, I felt myself flopping into view. I tried to adjust the kilt again, which was fine for a few steps; then I was hanging out again. Kelly turned to watch us, and I saw one of her breasts. I tried to look away, but I’m a guy, so it took more effort than it should have. I also felt a stiffening reaction coming on and felt like I was in middle school.

Brand grinned then tried to look irritated. “You staring at Kelly’s tit?” He cracked up. “Looks nice, doesn’t it?”

I suspected Brand never made it out of middle school. I tried to cover myself.

“Yo, Father Time. We need a different plan here.”

“There isn’t time for that.”

“I’m going to be too distracted if Kelly is dressed like that.”

“Grow up, Jonathan,” Sharon said. “It’s just a breast.”

“Yeah, but I’m a red-blooded American male.”

“So?”

“So the average guy thinks about sex once every ten seconds, and I’ve always considered myself to be above average.”

Kelly walked up to me. “Are you looking at me in a sexual way?”

“I’m trying not to.”

She laughed. “You’re blushing. I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“Can you cover up?” I asked. “Please?”

“You’re such a guy.” She turned around and walked back to the chairs.

“Seriously, we need a different plan. I can’t go around with my dick flopping out, and I can’t focus if Kelly is topless.”

BOOK: Anubis Nights
7.38Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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