Angel's Messiah (22 page)

After Hael had chatted with Gina and she’d kissed him on the cheek —
you remembered my Father when he was gone,
she had said to him — he crouched near me and placed his hands on my arm.

“I am glad you are happy now,” Hael said. “And I’m sorry you must lose your daughter. I truly hope she will come back to you, like Danizriel did.”

He brushed my cheek with his fingers and left. I was stunned speechless and looked to Danny for an answer, but he hadn’t heard our exchange. He was busy debating something with Michael. Gina saw the look on my face and promptly decided she would sit in my lap to cheer me up.

“Little Mother, everything will be fine. I promise,” she said.

She combed her fingers through my hair and held a small amount in her hands to plait. She continued plaiting small amounts of hair, as though to soothe me, until there was no hair left to plait. I felt I’d been given an instant face lift, so tightly did they pull on my scalp. Gina looked at my face and smiled.

“You look so much better, Little Mother. You’re not frowning anymore and your eyes are smiling.”

“That’s because the plaits are so tight they’re pulling my face up and back,” I said. “Can you loosen them a bit please?”

Gina lightly danced her fingers across my head and the plaits loosened slightly. She gathered the plaits in her hand and blew on the tips, causing them to crystallise. She let them drop and they tinkled as they clinked together, causing a ringing in my ears.

“They make a pretty sound, Little Mother, don’t you think?”

“Yes, they do. You could always get a job as a hairdresser if all else fails,” I said.

“Was I meant to put dresses on the plaits?” she asked.

I laughed. “No, Gina. A hairdresser is someone who makes your hair look nice. They dress it up, but not with clothes. Sometimes they might weave ribbons through it, but that’s about the closest to clothing they get.”

“Michael,” Gina said, “can I plait your beard?”

Danny chuckled. “Perhaps another time, Gina. We really should get going. The whole day has passed and you must be getting tired, or hungry for cake.”

Food! That reminded me how hungry I was. How long had it been since I’d eaten — fourteen months or so? I didn’t feel like I was weakening at all, and I could probably go without feeding for a while longer, if it wasn’t for the constant rumbling. I’d never liked the sound of my stomach rumbling, even when I was little. I used to trick it by drinking lots of water, to make it feel full, though admittedly I peed a lot. Now the water option was not available to me.

Gina did look a little tired, although the prospect of cake perked her up, for all of a minute. She put her hand over her mouth and yawned, leaning her head against my shoulder. After the yawn she fell asleep. Her face was peaceful and serene. I hoped it would always stay that way.

“Would you like me to take her?” Danny asked.

I slid my arms underneath her and stood up, feeling the muscles in my arms flex as I adjusted to her weight. I’d carried her for so long, what were a few more minutes.

“I can manage. I’ll meet you in Eden.”

I brushed my lips against Danny’s and disappeared home. We appeared directly in Gina’s bedroom and I laid her on the bed, pulling the cover over her. I thought about her being in pyjamas and the clothes she’d been wearing being clean and folded, sitting on her chair, and it was done.

Danny was already waiting for me in bed, holding a small ceramic jug.

“What’s that?” I asked.

“Melted chocolate. I hear chocolate is
very
nice.”

I laughed and climbed into bed, ready to be coated like a chocolate bar and eaten slowly. Thank goodness I hadn’t mentioned anything about bananas. That would be
too
much.

“Danny,” I said as we lay in each other’s arms afterwards, feeling somewhat naked without the thin layer of chocolate coating my body, “how can you think of letting Gina go?”

He nuzzled my hair with his nose and wrapped his arms tightly around me, as if he could protect me from Gina’s inevitable departure.

“All children leave the nest eventually, Helena, you should know that.”

“But they don’t leave to
die,
” I said sadly.

“You can’t know she’ll die.”

“Don’t you remember what happened to the
first
messiah?” I asked, starting to cry.

“That does not mean Gina’s fate will be the same. She’s different. She was born to immortals.”

“You really don’t understand mortals at all, do you? What they fear, they kill. They
will
fear her.”

I turned in his arms and sobbed into his chest.

“Do you know what our daughter’s name means?” he asked.

“No.”

“It means
Queen of the Angels.
” He kissed the top of my head as I continued to sob. “She does
not
have to die if she chooses not to.”

I looked up at him then, saw the hope in his eyes, and found comfort in them. I would just have to give her reason enough to live, to want to return to us when she had delivered her messages to the mortal world.

There is always hope.

I woke refreshed and relaxed in the morning. If I’d known what Danny had told me about Gina sooner, I would have been more at peace with what was to come, even if a small part of me — the cynical non-believer — still doubted.

“May I walk down to the stream to paddle my feet?” Gina called out from the garden.

“Go and have fun,” I said.

It was quiet and I took the time to do something I’d been regularly doing since Gina had disclosed she would have to leave one day — surf the Net. The mortal world no longer held an attraction for me the way it once had. I only wanted to keep up to speed with what was going on out there, so that I knew what Gina might be facing.

“Little Mother,” Gina cried out. “It’s time. Help me.”

I ran to her as fast as I could. She was standing in the ankle-deep water, her wings lying in the stream. The current was ruffling some of the feathers, making it look like they were trying to fly away. Gina was clutching her arms and looked frightened. I hugged her to me.

She’s changed her mind,
I told myself.
She doesn’t want to leave.

“
Please,
Little Mother, you have to tell me what is appropriate to wear in the mortal world.”

I screamed in frustration and anger. She had to leave, and very shortly, and all she could think about was what to wear.

Danny came running to us, having heard my scream. He didn’t need to ask what was wrong. He could see her wings for himself. He wrapped his arms around both of us and we stood there for a while, in the ankle-deep water, safe and secure in his grasp.

When Gina complained that she had to ready herself we returned to the cottage. Danny had picked up her wings and sent them away. I didn’t ask where they were. I didn’t want to know.

“Gina, I want to come with you,” I said.

Danny didn’t look surprised. He must have known I’d have trouble letting go.

“Little Mother, I must walk alone. This is my journey. Your path lies in a different direction.”

“I want to protect you, from yourself as much as the mortals. You’re still not ready.”

“My wings say I’m ready, and I do not need your protection, Little Mother. Our Father will protect me for as long as is necessary. And of course I know how to defend myself now. Uncle Drake saw to that.”

“Look what God’s protection did for the last child
He
sent to walk among them,” I yelled.

Gina touched my cheek, where a tear had fallen, and my fears melted away.

“Peace, Little Mother. This is not the end, only the beginning. Be
happy
for me.”

Stop it,
I thought.
I want to be afraid for you. You should be afraid for yourself.

“Helena, don’t let Gina’s last memory of us in Eden be one of sadness.”

I closed my eyes and took three deep breaths, telling myself I would be cool, calm and collected. When I opened them I felt outwardly calm, but behind my eyes a fire was burning, simmering away on low heat.

“Can I at least visit you every now and again?”

“No, Little Mother, you cannot. You will not see me again until my journey is complete.”

Gina sounded confident she would return to us. I would have to trust in my angels.

“Okay,” I said, rubbing my temples to help clear my head and focus. “What I suggest you wear is either smart, casual clothing, or if you want to blend in with the crowd, or if you’re travelling, jeans. Kind of like what I wear sometimes.”

“What you wear
most
of the time, Little Mother,” Gina corrected.

“I feel comfortable and safe when I blend in.”

Gina changed into jeans, a long sleeve top and running shoes.

“Don’t forget, you can’t transport or change your clothes in front of them. You’ll need somewhere private to do that. And don’t just sleep anywhere. Find a nice hotel to stay in if you have to sleep — there’s always the penthouse suite at the La’miere hotel. Do you need a credit card or money?”

“It’s all taken care of, Little Mother. I am well provided for.”

I hugged her to me and kissed her cheek.

“I love you, Regina Malakh.”

Gina stroked my hair and kissed my cheek.

“I love you too, Helena Malakh, Little Mother.”

I stepped back to allow Danny to embrace her. They spoke so softly I couldn’t hear them. I wondered what they were telling each other, apart from the obvious
I love you
. Gina would probably be telling Danny to look after me, that I’d need him more than ever now, as it was a very hard thing for me to let go of her — huge understatement — and Danny would probably be telling her to be careful, and to call his real name if she needed anything, and he would come.

When our goodbyes were said I put on a brave face and smiled. It was not an easy thing to do.

“I love you,” I called out one more time. Gina smiled, waved and disappeared.

A rainbow appeared on the spot she had been standing and soared up to the sky in an arc, heading west. Dust motes danced in the rainbow and I knew this was Gina’s way of bringing a little more light to my life. I watched and waited for the rainbow to disappear, but it stayed fixed where it was, a reminder of her departure.

“How long will the rainbow last?” I asked.

“Gina has tied it to her. As long as she is alive the rainbow will remain. She wanted you to know that she believes she will return. This symbolises her belief.”

My baby was gone, just like she always said she would, and I was torn inside.

The Book of Gina

17.
The Outside World

Gina arrived on the outskirts of an ordinary town, in an ordinary part of the world. It was early morning, when most people were still asleep. She took Little Mother’s words about travelling seriously, and began the hour-long trek into the heart of the city. She needed to locate somewhere to access what Little Mother had called the Internet. People talked around the world all the time using the Internet. There was bound to be somewhere she could access it, even at this late hour, and then she could begin spreading the word.

I need money,
Gina thought.

Gina felt a small bundle of notes appear in her pocket and thought how strange it was that bits of paper and plastic — things that didn’t really matter — made people greedy.

Two small, semi-detached stores were open. One was a convenience store and the other an Internet cafe. Gina wondered if she was meant to eat in the cafe while riding the Internet.

That doesn’t sound right,
Gina thought to herself.
What did Little Mother say she was doing? Surfing. That’s right, surfing the Net. It seems a strange place to surf, so far from the ocean.

There were three people in the Internet cafe, including the short, fat, balding man behind the counter, who was smoking a cigarette. The sign behind his head clearly said
No Smoking
, but at that time of the morning he thought,
Fuck it, anyone who’s here at this time of night is up to no good anyway.

“Hello,” Gina said. “I’d like to access the Internet, please.”

“That’ll be five bucks fifty an hour, minimum of one hour,” the fat man said.

Gina wasn’t sure what
bucks
were. She pulled a fifty-dollar note from her pocket.

“Will this do?”

“How long do you plan on staying?” the fat man asked.

“Maybe three hours. I have lots of research to do.”

“That’s plenty.”

He shuffled out from behind the counter to the computer closest to where he sat. He wanted to keep an eye on this one, and see what sort of research she might be doing at three in the morning. He shook the mouse from side to side to wake up the computer, and typed something via the keyboard.