Angel on a Leash (30 page)

My father died in 2001. He lived in Denver, and at the time, I lived in Seattle. I got to Denver shortly after he passed, and I spent time with my mother and my siblings—one brother, three sisters—at the family home in the time between his passing and his memorial service.

One morning, I was on the coffee run for all of us, and when I pulled into the driveway on my return, I saw a fox in the front yard. I had never seen a fox here, and when I told Mom about it, she said that Dad had seen the fox once before.

I am not sure that he was aware of this—I never heard him talk about it—but the Native American Indians were great believers in animal totems. Animals would reveal themselves to you, and their spirits would then become a totem in your life, providing an awareness of personality traits in your own spiritual identity.

According to Native American Indian lore, the fox is a symbol of wisdom and is the protector of the family unit, charged with keeping the family together and safe. That was certainly my father.

So as did my father before me, I have now had a fox reveal itself to me. It makes sense to me that this would be my father's totem; the fox may have even been my father, telling me that everything would be all right. In any case, I now can carry on.

There is a country song that has the lyrics, “I am my father's son, I am inclined to do what he has done.” The Bible (Proverbs 20:7) says it like this:

 

A righteous man who walks in his integrity, how blessed are his sons after him.

 

I am indeed blessed. My father was a man of integrity, and he was a spiritual man; at one point in his life he actually contemplated going to seminary. Instead, he became a football coach at the high school, college, and professional levels.

God shaped his life, and God helped him to shape the lives of others: the young people that he coached for more than fifty years.

He was a bit famous in his lifetime, but as an American poet once said, it doesn't matter who he was, what matters is who I remember he was.

I was on the
Today Show
a few years ago, right after he passed, and a man named Bill Wynne [see chapter 16] saw me. I met Bill through my involvement with dogs, and in an amazing coincidence, we discovered that he been stationed with my father in the same Army Air Corps company in the South Pacific in World War II.

Bill sent me an email that I treasure: “I just watched you on the
Today Show,
and I saw a lot of your father in you.” I couldn't have had a greater compliment.

My father didn't tell me or my brother and my sisters what to think; by living his life the way he did, he showed us how to think. My father never put any pressure on me to live up to any standards, but he inspired me to be the best that I could be, to give something back to the world. He did that for others, too, teaching us that we were accountable for our actions, but he let us learn about ourselves to live productive lives and enjoy the people around us. What perfect thoughts for us on Father's Day.

My dad lived this life with a football. I am trying to live the same life with my dogs, inspired by God and inspired by my own father. My father may be gone from this world, but he lives on in my heart and in my mind and, hopefully, in the things that I do every day.

As a football coach, my dad did it with some very simple rules, rules that applied not only to his players but also to life in general. And I am finding that my dogs play by my dad's rules:

 

• It doesn't matter if you make a mistake, as long as you are going full speed. That means that if you are trying to do the right thing and it doesn't work out, it's OK. It's the effort and the intent that matter. This is great—my dogs are always going at full speed, living life in the fast lane.

 

His other rules don't need any explanation, and I can see and hear them coming from my dogs' actions:

 

• Be nice to people.

• Expect the best from people. They are generally good; enjoy them in your life.

• Smile.

 

That's a perfect fit under the heading “Unconditional Love” when it comes to dogs.

Just as my father did with a football, I know that I am changing people's lives with my dogs, visiting people in the street and visiting people in hospitals and other health care facilities. Again to Proverbs, this time 4:11–13:

 

I instruct you in the way of wisdom and lead you along straight paths. When you walk, your steps will not be hampered. When you run, you will not stumble. Hold on to instruction, do not let it go. Guard it well, for it is your life.

 

And even more from Proverbs (23:15–16):

 

My son, if your heart is wise, then my heart will be glad; my inmost being will rejoice when your lips speak what is right.

 

I hope that every day my Holy Father and my own father are looking down on me here and rejoicing.

Happy Father's Day, Dad. I love you.

Thank you all for allowing me to share my father with you. I hope that you will all celebrate this special day with my father and me.

The End

T
he editors of
Dogs in Review,
a magazine of the dog show world, were running a questionnaire feature as part of their fifteenth-anniversary celebration, and they asked me to participate.

The final question was this: If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

My answer: “You're arriving later than we expected, but your Brittanys, Teigh and Belle, are still waiting right here for you.”

I know that they will be there, along with any of my other dogs who have gone before me.

From Job 12:10:

 

In whose hand is the soul of every living thing, and the breath of all mankind.

About the Author

David Frei is well known to millions of television viewers as the longtime cohost of USA Network's annual telecast of the popular Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show from New York's Madison Square Garden, a role he has played since 1990. His adventures with the Westminster Best in Show winners have taken him to such places as the White House and for a ride on a float in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade as well as appearances on programs including NBC's
Today Show,
ABC's
Good Morning America,
CBS's
Early Show, Ellen, The View, Martha Stewart,
and
Charlie Rose.
He has been Director of Communications for the Westminster Kennel Club since 2003.

David also has cohosted NBC's annual Thanksgiving Day telecast of the National Dog Show presented by Purina, which is seen by approximately 20 million viewers each year, since its inception in 2002.

A longtime breeder-owner-handler and judge in the world of purebred dogs, David has judged all over the world, in the United States, Canada, Australia, Denmark, China, and other countries, and he has also enjoyed much competitive success with his Afghan Hounds, Brittanys, and Cavalier King Charles Spaniel. David is most proud of the wonderful work that his own dogs do as therapy dogs, regularly visiting patients and families at Ronald McDonald House New York and Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center, both in New York City.

With Westminster, David helped to create Angel On A Leash, a charitable endeavor supporting a therapy dog program at the NewYork-Presbyterian Morgan Stanley Children's Hospital. Angel On A Leash has become an independent 501(c)(3) charity with David as president and CEO and has expanded into a number of additional facilities across the country.

David is a past board member of Take The Lead, a charity that provides support for people in the dog show world with life-threatening and financially devastating illnesses and injuries. He is also a past board member of the Morris Animal Foundation, a member of the St. Jude's Children's Hospital Sports Council, and a past president of the Afghan Hound Club of America.

With Mike Lingenfelter, David coauthored
The Angel by My Side,
a critically acclaimed chronicle of a heroic service dog, published in 2002 and the winner of two DWAA awards (
www.angelbymyside.com
).

In 2004, he appeared in one of the final episodes of the HBO hit series
Sex and the City,
playing a smitten dog show judge awarding a big win to Charlotte and her Cavalier (mostly to Charlotte).

Previously, he held public relations positions with the Denver Broncos, San Francisco 49ers, and ABC-TV Sports in New York. His wife, Cherilyn, is a certified Catholic chaplain and Director of Spiritual Care and Family Support at the Ronald McDonald House New York.