And Then Came A Lion (Lions and Lambs Book 1) (9 page)

“Ma’am?”

“I’m on my way.”

She hung up, raced to the kitchen, and grabbed her keys. Her world had shattered and she was falling through the cracks.

Susannah didn’t remember the drive to the hospital, or parking. She did remember sprinting through the double doors of the emergency room. A nurse ushered her into a small waiting room. A police officer was waiting.

He nodded. “Mrs. Carlson, please sit down.”

Susannah perched on the edge of the small couch. The door opened and a doctor came in. He stood next to the officer. The man’s somber countenance pre-announced Mark’s condition.

“I am sorry I don’t have good news, Mrs. Carlson. Your husband’s internal injuries are too severe. He has been in a coma since arriving and has not regained consciousness. We do not expect he will.

“However, before you see him, Officer Mullin needs a moment with you. When you are done, one of the nurses will take you to your husband.”

He closed the door with a soft click.

Officer Mullin cleared his throat. “There was a car pursuit. The criminal blew the light at North Foothills and Ruby Drive and rammed your husband’s car broadside.”

Susannah closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “I saw an Amber Alert for a ten year old girl. Was it the same man?”

“Yes.”

Numbness spread from her heart, encapsulating her mind and body in a hard cocoon that kept the intense pain out ― for the moment.

She nodded. “And the girl?”

“In ICU, but expected to recover. The abductor is uninjured and currently in custody.”

Mark dying, the little girl seriously hurt, and the monster survived without a scratch. Where was the justice in that?

“Mrs. Carlson, is there anything I can do for you before I leave?”

Susannah looked up at him and shook her head.

The officer nodded and exited the room.

Instantly a nurse appeared in the doorway. “Mrs. Carlson, if you would like to follow me, I will take you to your husband now.”

She led Susannah to a small private room. “I’ll be just down the corridor if you need anything.”

Susannah nodded and stepped inside.

Mark’s face was swollen and bruised. Wires and tubes ran everywhere, connecting to various machines. She sat in the chair some kind soul had set next to the bed and held Mark’s hand to her cheek. She rubbed his arm and kissed his forehead. She smoothed his hair and kissed him again. The hours slid by, eight, nine, ten. Mark never opened his eyes, never returned the pressure on her hand. At ten minutes past ten, he stopped breathing and slipped away.

Susannah bowed her head. The cocoon refused to let tears pass through its tough shell. They would eventually come, along with the intense pain, but not now, not in this public place. Later, she when alone in a private place, then Sorrow could enter and unpack her bags.

The nurse opened the door. “Are you all right, Mrs. Carlson?”

“Yes.”

“Your parents are here. They’re waiting in the small conference room. After you sign a few forms, you are free to go.”

Susannah stood, took one last look at Mark’s serene face, and followed the nurse out of the room. She stopped at the nurses’ station and signed the papers. 

Valerie and Ethan hurried over to her.

Valerie hugged her. “Oh, Susannah. We are so sorry.”

“Oh Mom, I can’t bear this.”

Ethan looked as grief stricken as she. “Let’s go home and talk there.”

Valerie nodded and took Susannah’s arm. “You’re coming home with us for tonight. Your dad’s going to take your car back to you house and pick up Buddy.”

Susannah nodded and climbed into the passenger seat of her parent’s car.

The streets were eerily quiet, but then at that hour most people were home, tucked in their beds. She looked up at the night sky. The stars reminded her of broken glass. When a heart shattered, was it possible to mend?

She heard the old Indian’s voice. “All things are possible with God, Susannah.”

I hope so, oh how I hope so.

***

Susannah followed her mom up the front steps and into the house.

Valerie paused just inside the door. “Go on down to the guest room, Susannah. Try to sleep.”

Susannah walked down the hallway and stopped in the doorway to the pastel blue room. Her mom had been right with the color choice. It was soothing, peaceful.

She slipped off her shoes and slid under the comforter. Closing her eyes, she allowed fatigue to drag her into sleep. At some point, Buddy jumped up next to her and cuddled close.

“Susannah.”

She opened her eyes.

The old Indian stood next to the bed. “I have a gift for you.”

A bright light spread across the room, enveloping her in warmth. Other souls stood in the light. She recognized her grandparents, beloved friends, and Mark. None spoke, yet their joy engulfed her, the same peace she experienced during her vision on Palm Sunday. She understood the gift. It was a small glimpse into what Mark was now experiencing. How could she begrudge him that joy?

She cried out. “But, don’t leave me behind! Take me with you!”

The old Indian shook his head. “No, Susannah. It is not your time. God still has plans for your life.”

The faces of thousands of children paraded past in rapid succession and then vanished.

The old Indian disappeared. The light receded, but not the peace. It lingered, joining Sorrow, blending the two emotions into a sweet bond.

***

The bedroom door opened and Rachel peered into the room. “Are you awake?”

Susannah pulled the comforter down and rolled over onto her side. “Yeah. Been awake for a bit, just haven’t rustled up enough energy to crawl out.”

“Well, I brought coffee and rolls, thought we could have a moment together.” She moved over to the bed and hugged her friend. “There are no words to take away your pain, but just know that Frank and I love you. All you have to do is tell us what you need, and it’s done.”

“Thank you, Rachel. But, I have all I need ― almost.”

Her friend leaned back and studied her face. “Something happened.”

“Yes. Something miraculous.”

Rachel took Susannah’s hand and pulled her to her feet. “Tell me over coffee and rolls.”

They sat at the small kitchen table. Sunshine poured through the large patio doors. The light reminded her of the old Indian’s gift.

Still enveloped in that aura of peace, she sipped her coffee and nibbled on a sweet roll.

“So,” Rachel said. “What was your miracle?”

Susannah described the light, the peace, joy, ecstasy, and Mark.

Rachel leaned back in her chair. “Wow.”

“I know. I don’t know how long it will last, but I will cling to it for as long as I can.”

Susannah, accompanied by her parents, met with the funeral director that afternoon. She chose the cover and the wording for the program, selected the scripture for the liturgy, and picked out the music.

The funeral director gently steered the conversation to the most difficult question. “Mrs. Carlson, do you want an additional plot, or would you prefer a Columbarium, a niche to hold the ashes?”

“I’ll take one of the niches.”

“Certainly.”

“And, I’d like a private viewing for family and closest friends, then the cremation, and then the memorial service, followed by internment of the urn.”

The funeral director nodded. “Anything else I can do for you?”

“No.”
Except bring my husband back
.

***

Susannah was at the funeral parlor before the doors opened at nine the morning of the viewing. She followed the attendant down a long hallway to a curtained doorway. He drew back the heavy drapes and stepped aside.

She walked over to the plain pine casket and looked down at the body. “Oh, Mark, how am I supposed to go on? How can I continue to live? You were my life, and when you left, you took my life with you. I don’t want to go on. I don’t want to chase after any more monsters.” She swallowed a sob. “And yet, I can’t let the children die. Oh, God, what am I supposed to do? I can’t handle this. I can’t.”

She swiped away the tears, felt for the chair and sat. She placed her hand on the edge of the casket and lowered her head to the wood.

Several hours passed. Friends and family came and went. Susannah refused to leave the room except to give other viewers privacy. Even then, she stood just outside the curtain. She declined offers of food and water, staying beside Mark’s body.

At five o’clock, the attendant entered the chamber. “Mrs. Carlson. The funeral home is closing.”

Susannah nodded. “Okay.”

After he withdrew, she stood, kissed Mark’s forehead and smoothed his hair. “I will never stop loving you.”

With one last look, she turned and left the room.

***

The bitter cold, augmented by heavy winds, pushed the small group of mourners into a huddle beside the grave. Susannah stared at the dark clouds and the bare branches. How fitting, a somber, miserable day.

Her pastor gave a beautiful eulogy, which did little to comfort Susannah. His glowing remarks regarding Mark only emphasized her loss. Mark was a good man. He had a few faults, as everyone did, but at his core, he was kind, caring, loving. She would never know that kind of love again. That part of her life was now over.

She looked back up at the gray sky. A patch of blue appeared. She glimpsed a flock of birds and a meadowlark sang from a nearby fence. She remembered the words to her favorite song. Yes, why couldn’t she fly over the rainbow and away from all the pain? Because the lead weight in her heart wouldn’t let her leave the ground.

***

Susannah and her folks stood in her driveway beside Frank and Rachel’s car. Sunlight, absent from the day before during the funeral, now engulfing the world in light. If only it would illuminate the dark places in her heart. The old cliché stated that time would heal all wounds. How much time would it take for her heart to heal, a lifetime?

Ethan patted her arm. “Susie, we can’t think of going back south and leaving you here alone.”

“Dad, I love you, love all of you, but there has been a continuous stream of bodies through this house since the accident, and I’m tired. I need to sleep ― and I need to be alone.”

“Are you sure? You know, since you’ve taken a leave of absence from your job, you could come with us for a while. Just get a way for a bit.”

“No, I really do need some alone time. You and Mom go on back to your Arizona sunshine. Frank and Rachel are just a short walk, or phone call away. When I feel ready to travel, I’ll hop a plane and join you.”

“We’ll come back north by April, sooner if you need us.”

“Okay, but I’ll be fine. Go and enjoy.” She turned to Frank. “Thank you for driving them to the airport.”

“My pleasure, Susannah. Anything I can do to help.”

She waved goodbye as Frank backed out of the driveway, turned, and went into the house. Silence met her at the door. The deep, encompassing silence she had craved for the last week. She needed time to think ― and to rest. All the visitors meant well, but the constant company drained her.

A gust of wind rattled the window and she shivered. So much for a day of sunshine and warm spring rains. The weather, just like life, seemed to change with every breath.

She went into the kitchen, made a cup of hot tea, and carried it into the den. She snuggled into her chair. Buddy didn’t wait for an invitation. He jumped into her lap and molded his body around her.

Susannah sipped her tea, her mind roaming through her memories, reliving the joys and trying to forget the pain. Sorrow wouldn’t leave, but Peace joined her, dulling the ache and giving birth to Acceptance. Somewhere there were blue birds, blue sky, and rainbows, and if she looked hard enough, she’d get a glimpse. Someday that brief sighting would expand until she would once again walk in sunshine with Joy.

***

Brian set the last of the boxes in the van and closed the door. With the other vehicles loaded, the other members climbed in and pulled out. Brian closed the big doors. He didn’t mind staying behind. In fact, he preferred it, except for Charlie. The man had no self-control. It wouldn’t be long before he tested the upper limits of this organization’s tolerance, which he had no doubt was limited, and once reached, would result in deadly consequences.

He’d heard the rumors of horrific murders committed during some kind of religious ceremony, and planned to stay well away from such doings. Charlie seemed determined to be an unhappy participant. Charlie was a fool.

Brian walked back to the small room he used as his sleeping quarters and flopped down on the cot. The single bulb hanging from the low ceiling shed a weak light. That didn’t matter. He used the room only for sleep and a place to store his few possessions. He kept his duffel bag packed with a couple sets of clothes and a growing stash of money ― his emergency fund. By the time that was large enough to facilitate moving on, he’d bolt, staying well out of reach of both the cops and the mob, or whatever they called themselves.  

Charlie had offered his apartment, but Brian quickly refused. He’d seen decay, but Charlie took that to a level even he couldn’t tolerate. He may have what others called perversions, but he wasn’t a slob. In fact, he had expensive tastes. If he could be certain this organization wouldn’t destroy him, it could prove to be a very lucrative association. Could he walk a fine enough line to be included in the pay offs, but not in any of the deeper levels of their so-called religion? Maybe ― if he kept away from Charlie.

The other unsettled issue was the interfering witch. The media had blasted his and her name across the entire country after his failed attempt to silence her. Well, he’d have another chance before he moved on. He’d make certain of that.

***

Drawing in a deep breath, Susannah rolled over, three in the morning. Well, so much for extra sleep. Susannah looked down at Buddy.

“I think I’ll have some coffee. Would you like a doggie cookie?”

Buddy’s stub of a tail wriggled back and forth.

She slipped on her robe and slippers, and went downstairs with Buddy tight on her heels. Velcro Dog took on a completely new meaning since Mark’s death. It seemed Buddy missed Mark as much as she did, perhaps even more, if it was possible.

With a sigh, she fought with the cranky brewer until she had a full cup. Guess it was time to replace the thing, but that meant a shopping trip. She turned away and stared out the window. The weather had cleared, and although still cool, the days were sunny. Buds formed on the trees and crocus and daffodils bravely pushed up into the sunlight. They
were
brave. Spring in the High Desert rarely stuck around until at least May, giving way here and there to a few late season snowstorms. It wasn’t unusual to see them encased in white.

She poured her coffee and settled into the breakfast nook. With Buddy asleep at her feet, she opened her first devotional.

Refuse to hate back.

Refuse to hate? Those monsters had taken Mark and so many other lives. Then add the fact Brian Falun was still out there, destroying lives and getting away with it, and she wasn’t to hate back? Wasn’t to want justice?

Shaking her head, she continued reading. Forgiveness wasn’t the same as forgetting. It was the act of releasing the hate and bitterness festering in the soul. Once released, the heart would once again find peace.

Peace? Just how did one go about finding peace with all the horrible things going on in the world and in her personal life? That would take miracle.

She turned to the next listed scripture, Luke 6:36 to 38. “Be therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful. Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you shall be forgiven. Give, and it shall be given to you: good measure and pressed down and shaken together and running over shall they give into your bosom. For with the same measure that you shall mete withal, it shall be measured to you again.”

In essence, she was to forgive, let go of her ego, let go of her need to be righteous, and let go of the hate. Even if she couldn’t forget, she was to forgive. Was she to continue rescuing the kids, but not seek, or desire, retribution? That was a tall order. And receive? She had given everything. The only thing left was her life, what was left of it.

Shaking her head, she turned to the next reading. It quoted 1 Samuel 17:34-35. “And David said to Saul: ‘Thy servant kept his father’s sheep, and there came a lion, or a bear, and took a ram out of the midst of the flock: And I pursued after them, and struck them and delivered it out of their mouth.”’

Was that what she was doing, snatching lambs from the mouths of lions?