And the Greatest of These Is Love: A Contemporary Christian Romance Novel (32 page)

“No, Sir. I will not,” Andrew said as another louder murmur crossed the courtroom, and Judge Carson glanced to the back irritably. He clearly didn’t like this turn of events one bit.

“Your Honor,” Blankenship said, looking at the judge as if pleading for some help.

“Mr. Clark, please answer the questions,” Judge Carson said as he shifted in his seat, obviously becoming more uneasy with each passing second.

“I’m sorry, Your Honor. Those sources were confidential, and as such I am not at liberty to give out that information.”

Judge Carson exhaled. “You do realize that by not answering Counsel’s questions, I have no choice but to find you in contempt of this court and remand you to the county jail once again.”

“Yes, Your Honor,” Andrew said suddenly the only solid voice in the entire courtroom. “I do fully understand that.”

There was a long, silent pause as Judge Carson readjusted his glasses and cleared his throat. “Very well then, Mr. Clark. I have no choice but to find you in contempt. We will schedule the next hearing on this matter for one o’clock Wednesday afternoon — maybe a change of the time of day will improve your memory.”

It was supposed to be a joke, but nobody laughed. Judge Carson banged the gavel, and Andrew allowed himself to be led back to the hard mattress he had come to call home.

Road Runner beep-beeped across the screen, and Antonio giggled. From her station at the kitchen sink, Gabi smiled. He was getting better, and things were definitely looking up.

The phone jingled to life, and she picked it up. “Hello?”

“Gabi?” Bryan’s voice came over the line, and he sounded more depressed than she’d ever heard him.

A new worry overtook the old. “Bryan, what’s wrong?”

He sighed. “How’s Antonio?”

“Better,” she said, ducking into the living room to check on the little figure sprawled on the floor. Then she came back and put as much distance between her and the little ears as she could. “How’s Andrew?”

There was a long, silent pause, and Gabi knew the worst was coming.

“There’s no change,” Bryan sighed again, and Gabi closed her eyes. How long could this go on?

“He’s still not talking?” she asked, still unable to fully believe that this was really happening.

“No, and I don’t think he’s going to either,” Bryan said. “I really hate to ask you this, Gabi. I mean, I know you’ve got your hands full already, but is there any way you can come talk to him? I’m at my wits’ end. He won’t listen to me, and I don’t know what else to do.”

“Well,” she said with a frown as she considered the problem of what to do with Antonio. “I really don’t want to take Antonio down there right now.”

“Okay. Well, maybe I could come over and stay with him,” Bryan said, and immediately Gabi wanted out of this situation.

“Oh, Bryan, I don’t think so,” she said, looking around as if to find some way to talk him out of this. “I mean…”

“Please, Gabi. Andrew needs you.”

When Bryan arrived at her apartment, Gabi had never felt so poverty-stricken in all her life. She knew he was comparing her tiny, dingy apartment to his luminous house, and she knew how badly her apartment was faring in that comparison.

“Nice place,” he said, looking around the tiny living room. “It reminds me of the first place Pam and I had after we got married.”

Gabi smiled gratefully, and in spite of her head telling her he was just being nice, her heart said it really didn’t matter why he was doing it. He was being kind to her — regardless of where she lived or what her income was.

“I won’t be long,” she said quietly gathering her keys and coat. “Antonio’s napping right now. He should be up in an hour or so. There’s soup in this cabinet, and the bowls are over here. Umm… the Calamine lotion’s in the medicine cabinet. He shouldn’t really need that anymore, but just in case. Oh, there’s a couple of games in here. Here’s a deck of cards. The television’s right there. Umm...”

“Gabi,” Bryan said softly, and the litany stopped. It took effort, but she managed to look up at him. “I’m sure we’ll be fine.”

She smiled in spite of the judgments of herself that were snaking through her, and as she looked into Bryan’s face, she wished with everything she had that the green eyes she found there really belonged to Andrew.

“Thanks, Bryan. I really appreciate this,” she said, willing herself to keep it together long enough to get out the door.

“Anytime,” he said, nodding. Then he reached out and put his hands on her arms. “Just please, talk some sense into my brother.”

“I’ll try.” But even as she said it, she knew there was really nothing she could say.

The drive to the courthouse was a crash course in nerve suppression.

“It’s just Andrew,” she repeated over and over to herself. “He’s the same guy. It’s no big deal.”

But her heart said differently.

When they called him out of the cell, Andrew was sure Bryan was back for another lecture, and he had to physically force himself up off the mattress. He was tired of lectures. If Bryan wasn’t willing to stand by his decision, then maybe it was time for Andrew to find himself a new lawyer.

He didn’t want to, of course, but Bryan’s constant nagging was really wearing thin. In fact, Andrew decided, this would be the last lecture he would allow himself to be a part of. Bryan would just have to understand.

Andrew’s determination to stand by his decision became all-consuming the closer he got to the room, and by the time the guard opened the door and un-handcuffed him, he was fully prepared to unleash all the pent-up anger on the next person he saw. However, the second he stepped across the threshold, all the anger and frustration about his present situation vanished with a poof into thin air.

Even during the endless nights of caring for Antonio when the only thing that had kept her going was the thought of seeing Andrew again, Gabi’s fantasies of how this moment would be had never even come close to this reality. In one breath her whole world stood on end and tottered there. It took everything she had to keep herself from literally jumping into his arms. But what would that say about her, about him, about them? It was those questions that kept her spirit planted even as her heart soared.

“Andrew,” she said, barely getting the name past the air rushing out of her lungs. She stood uncertainly, willing her galloping emotions not to overtake her completely. However, that was proving to be nearly impossible as she suddenly found herself gazing into the pools of green she had seen every time she’d closed her eyes over the past few days, and the only thing she wanted to do at that moment was to get lost in them forever.

“Gabi?” His gaze searched hers as if asking if she was really and truly there. “I... I didn’t expect to see you here.”

“Yeah, well, I thought… I needed to come by, and, umm… Bryan’s... taking care of Antonio,” she said, willing herself to think rationally and knowing if she took even a single step in his direction, she would never be able to tear herself away again.

“How’s Antonio?” Andrew asked without ever taking his eyes off of her. Just seeing her again was like being in heaven, and at that moment, he had the vague impression that even if he never got the chance to hold her again, just looking at her would be enough to last a lifetime.

“He’s fine,” she said, fighting to keep her mind focused on what he was saying and away from the strength she could see rippling across his chest, through his shoulder blades, and down into his arms.

Arms she had so desperately wanted to feel around her more times than she could count over the last few endless nights, and now they were there only a heartbeat away, and it was taking everything she had not to throw herself into them and never look back.

“I... That’s… That’s good,” he said, willing his senses to come back to him, but they were practically scattering at his feet, and at the moment, he didn’t even care.

“How are you?” she asked, forcing her eyes to leave the temptation of his body and find his eyes again, but when she did, her breath caught in her chest, and her heart began to pound.

“Fine,” he said simply, and she nodded through the haze in her mind.

For one, brief moment nothing around or between them moved. The formalities were over, and they had come to a crossroads. Where they went from here was anybody’s guess.

“I... missed you,” he finally admitted, watching for whatever reaction that confession would bring.

Slowly the tension in her face melted away, and for the first time in many days, her smile was genuine.

“I missed you, too,” she said, and with that, the walls between them crumbled. Without another thought she stepped over and he swept her into his arms.

As she came in to his embrace, he closed his eyes, and simply allowed his arms to pull her to him as his brain began recording everything he had come to love about her. Her perfume, the feel of her hair, and the feel of her next to him. It was all so familiar and yet so new, and with everything he had, he never wanted this moment to end.

“I missed you so much,” he breathed as his voice pushed its way through the hole his heart had become since she’d last walked out that door. His fingers twined into the waves of her hair, holding her to him, never wanting to let her go again. “I was beginning to think I’d never see you again.”

“I’m sorry.” She hugged him all the tighter. “I was so awful to you, and then Antonio got sick, and I couldn’t leave him, and…”

“No,” he said firmly, “you don’t have to apologize, Gabi. Please, you of all people don’t have to apologize. I practically dumped my son on you, and you took him in without even a single question asked. I’m the one who should be apologizing.”

Against his chest he felt her head shake, and he smiled.

“Gabi, listen to me,” he said before she had a chance to protest. “There’s something I need to tell you. Something I should’ve said a long time ago. Thank you. I couldn’t have done any of this without you.”

“But I didn’t do anything,” she protested then as she released her grip on him, her brain taking over her actions again.

“Yes, you did,” he said incredulously as he pulled away from her and searched for her eyes, but she wouldn’t look at him.

Gently his fingers came under her chin until she was looking right back into his eyes, and suddenly his heart rent wide open for all to see. “Until I found you, I was willing to live my life with bars around me all the time — at work, at home, everywhere. But the second I saw you, all that changed. Living behind the bars wasn’t even an option anymore, I wanted more. Gabi, do you hear what I’m telling you?”

She was trying to, but something inside her said she’d heard all this before — in what seemed like a different lifetime.

“Gabi, I’m trying to say I…”

“No.” She yanked herself away from him, turning and trying to put as much distance as she could between them. “Andrew, I can’t do this. I can’t. I’m sorry.”

“Gabi?” he asked, the sadness and hurt pouring out of him cascaded into his voice. “Why not? What’s wrong?”

Her eyes searched the blank, gray wall in front of her for some explanation as she wrapped her arms around herself protectively. But there was no way her heart could ever begin to explain it to anyone — much less to Andrew Clark, the guy who obviously wanted more than she would ever be prepared to give.

“I can’t explain it, Andrew,” she said, shaking from the effort of keeping herself together. “I just... I can’t do it. Not again.”

Again? What does that mean?
his mind screamed at him, and it was all he could do not to lash out and take out his frustrations on her at that moment.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” she said softly, almost without emotion. “Believe me, I never meant for it to go this far.”

Something in her voice stopped the raging torrent inside his own mind, and suddenly what he was feeling no longer mattered. He needed to be there for her. This had nothing at all to do with what he wanted.

“Gabi,” he said, bridging the gap between them with one step. Gently he reached out and took hold of her arms, and when he turned her to face him again, the sadness, fear, and hurt in her eyes melted every hard piece of his heart. “Gabi, talk to me.”

Slowly she shook her head, and her eyes tried to find the floor between them. “No, I can’t.”

The first tear slipped over the edge and slid down her cheek.

“Gabi,” he said gently. “Look at me. It’s Andrew. You can tell me. Whatever it is, we’ll work it out.”

“This isn’t something I can just work out, Andrew,” she said, the hurt turning to anger and back again like the beat of her heart. She closed her eyes and shook her head as pain slashed across her features. “I’m not who you think I am. Believe me, I wish I was, but I’m not. I’m... just... not.”

The tears were tumbling from her eyes faster now, and the harder she tried to stop them, the more incessant they became. He didn’t understand. He couldn’t. And he never would.