Amelia's Journey (17 page)

Mary Beth turned to Andrew. “The dress shop Grandmama uses is right near Faneuil Hall. I need to pick up some things she ordered, so we'll meet you over there.”

They ambled across the street. Ben bowed to Amelia and opened the book shop door for her. “After you, Miss Haynes.” At least he was close to her though not alone. He had to find a place where they could talk.

She grabbed up a children's book. “Oh, look, it's a book about Santa Claus,
The Night Before Christmas
. I'm getting this for Billy and will read it to him tonight. He was worried at breakfast that Santa Claus wouldn't find him here in Boston.”

“He'll love the story. Thank you for thinking of him. I trust you told him that Santa would find him here?” Just like Billy to worry about something like that. He was on the verge of not believing anymore, but he needed this Christmas.

“Oh, I did.” She hurried to another display. “Here's the book I want for Papa.” She headed for the store clerk. “I won't be but a minute.”

He stood back and observed as she paid for her purchases. She wore a jaunty black hat trimmed in blue feathers and bows. Now where did they find a bird that color of blue? It sat atop her golden brown hair and dipped to one side. Two perfect curls lay against her neck, dangling from the rest of her upswept hair. Her smile for the clerk warmed his heart. He could tell she enjoyed talking with people of all backgrounds.

She completed her transaction and headed for him. “Now I have almost all my Christmas gifts purchased. Let's find a place to sit and chat.”

That's exactly what he had in mind. They walked a few blocks until they came upon a place where they could sit and enjoy something warm to drink. As they settled into place with cups of cocoa in front of them, all the things he wanted to say became a jumbled puzzle in his mind. He tried to sort the pieces, but none would fit together the way he wanted.

Amelia clasped her hands in her lap and chewed the corner of her lip. “I've waited since last Thursday to have time with you, and now that we're here, everything I wanted to talk about has vanished from my brain. All I can think about is that you'll be leaving to go back to Kansas soon and I have no idea when I'll see you again.”

He extended his hands across the table. “Here, put your hands in mine. I'm the same way. The words I'd worked out are all out of place now. All I know is that I want to be with you.”

She reached out and let him grasp her hands. “This is so hard. My heart aches when we're apart, and my brain turns to mush when we're together.”

“I feel the same. Your father wants you to marry well and stay here close to him and your mother. I can understand that. I don't particularly want Mary Beth to marry Andrew and stay here in Boston, but if that's what she wants to do, she will. It will hurt Ma and Pa to have her so far away, but they know they can't stand in the way of her happiness.” If only Mr. Carlyle could realize the same for Amelia.

The noise of the other patrons rose around them with laughter and joy filling the air. Glasses clinked as people toasted each other and enjoyed the afternoon. They sat in silence for a few minutes letting the sounds envelop them in a cocoon of frustration and despair.

Amelia's eyes glistened with moisture. “I don't see any hope for us, Ben. Philip invited me to a Christmas party, and I had to accept. Mary Beth will be there because it's at Andrew's home.”

“Yes, I know about it as I was invited too, but unfortunately I need to leave before then. Gideon and I will return to the ranch, where we're needed for the time being. We will be back for Christmas, but of course with Grandpapa's health, we have no way of knowing what will happen between now and then.” His grandfather lay dying, and here he was talking of going to a party. Most likely he wouldn't live until Christmas, and how hard that would be on Grandmama, who loved the holiday season. No one had even discussed decorating the house or getting a tree as yet.

“I'm worried about Billy and Grace Ann,” he said. “Christmas has always been special to them, and now things are in such disarray, I'm not sure Ma or Pa have had time to think about what to do for them.”

“I got that impression this morning at breakfast. We invited them to stay with us for Christmas Eve, but I know they want to be with your mother and father.”

He squeezed her hands. “Let's take what happens one day at a time. I love you, and that will not change, but circumstances will, especially if Grandpapa dies. As long as I know your love for me holds true and strong, I can handle your father's objections. I firmly believe the Lord is going to work things out for us just as He did for my parents.”

“It will, Ben, oh, it will.”

No matter what happened in the days and weeks ahead, if they fully relied on God and were obedient to His will, their problems would take care of themselves. When he returned to Kansas, he would make plans hoping for the best, and God would take care of the results.

Chapter 16

A
melia loved the church services on the Sunday before Christmas. The words from the prophet Isaiah brought comfort to her soul, especially this Christmas Eve Sunday. Jesus was indeed her Wonderful Counselor, and she would need all the guidance He could give in the weeks ahead.

The glow from all the candles situated around the church added to the beauty of the Scriptures, and the red bows and greenery that decked the railings around the choir loft and pulpit added to the gaiety of the season. Peace and joy filled the faces of those around her, and Amelia sent up a prayer of thanks for the blessings she'd received the past year, especially in meeting Ben. The voices of the congregation had risen to sing the carols of Christmas, and Amelia had joined in with gusto as they sang “Joy to the World.”

The Haynes family sat in their customary pew without Ben and Gideon, who would arrive by train later this afternoon to spend the holiday. Mary Beth had slipped her another note from Ben, and it all but burned a hole in Amelia's pocket.

He'd already sent one in which he described the land he'd chosen for a house. She pictured the stream and old mill in her mind and prayed she would sometime soon see it in person. She had no idea what the country looked like really and had seen it only through Ben's and Mary Beth's eyes. What if Mama was right, and it wasn't really a place she would want to live, even with Ben there? More often in the past week, those doubts had crept into her head and tried to settle in, but so far she'd been able to sweep them out.

Once again his message came to mind. Not only did she have his letter to savor in the quiet of the afternoon after dinner, but she also had his arrival to anticipate. Mr. Haynes had rallied enough that he wanted to spend Christmas with his family. All the aunts, uncles, and cousins would join Ben's family for the celebration this night. She would miss having Billy and Grace Ann at her house, but Christmas meant families being together, and that's where those two belonged.

Amanda and Charles, along with Grandma and Grandpa Carlyle, would be at the house later today and Christmas Day, but Amelia still longed to be with Ben. If the Lord was willing, they'd have the next Christmas and all the Christmases after together.

The service ended, and Amelia joined her parents as they greeted Clara and Mr. and Mrs. Haynes. Mary Beth pulled her aside. “Andrew is planning to ask Ma and Pa for my hand in marriage tonight!”

Amelia stifled a squeal of delight and grasped Mary Beth's hands. “That's wonderful! I knew it would happen soon. I'm so happy for you.”

“Don't say a word to anyone yet. He has his grandmother's ring he will give to me on Christmas Day. This is where you come in. We're going to take a carriage ride to celebrate our betrothal on Tuesday. Andrew is going to ask your father to allow you to come with us. Ben will be along too. That way you can be with him.”

Her short, clipped sentences spoke of her haste to impart the message before their parents called them away. Amelia hugged her. “I'll be ready. Surely Papa can't refuse such a request from Andrew. He wouldn't do anything to offend a Farnsworth.”

Mama called for her to come, and she squeezed Mary Beth's hand before joining her parents. Her heart now rang with as much joy as the carols they'd sung earlier. What a blessed Christmas this would be.

When they arrived home, the most delicious aromas filled the house. Lettie must have been cooking all night to have this ready for the family after church. Amelia's nose detected ham with a honey glaze, sweet potatoes, and the cinnamon aroma of apple pie. Her stomach rumbled in anticipation, and she rushed upstairs to freshen up before the meal.

Dinner didn't disappoint any of them. Grandma and Grandpa complimented Lettie, and Grandpa asked for seconds. After dinner Amanda joined Amelia upstairs in her bedroom while the men retired to Papa's study and Mama entertained Grandma. Amelia hugged her sister. “We've had so little opportunity to visit since your wedding.”

“Yes, Mama and Mother Bishop keep me busy with social obligations, and you've been involved with all the social events of coming out.” Amanda arranged her bustle and sat on one of the purple velvet boudoir chairs in the room.

Amelia sat in the matching chair on the other side of a cherry side table. “You look so happy. I can tell Charles dotes on you. Every time we're around you two, he jumps at your beck and call.”

“Married life has been wonderful, although some parts of it would be hard to bear if I did not love him so immensely.” She leaned toward Amelia. “I do hope you find a love like Charles and I have. It makes a world of difference despite what others may tell you.”

“I think I have.”

“Oh, is it Philip Barlow? What a catch he would be.”

Amelia's cheeks burned, and she lowered her head to escape detection. “I know he would be, but Benjamin Haynes has captured my heart.”

Her sister gasped. “Benjamin Haynes?”

“Yes, and he feels the same about me.” Amelia grasped her hands and twisted her fingers together.

Amanda knelt beside her. “Oh, my, what does Papa think? With Benjamin living in Kansas now, I'm sure he's opposed.”

“He is, and I don't want to be disobedient, but I love Ben with all my heart. We renewed our friendship at your wedding, and our love has grown since then.” She blinked back tears. “Oh, Amanda, I don't know what to do. Papa and Mama expect me to marry Philip or some other suitable man from Boston, but I just can't.”

“You do have a problem. Have you told Mama of your feelings?”

“Yes, but she feels the same as Papa. When I'm with Philip, I feel nothing but friendship, but with Ben, I want to spend every moment with him and share my thoughts with him. He talks of building us a house in Kansas where we would live on land he will own a share of next year. We've been writing to each other.”

“I see, and I suppose Papa knows nothing about the letters.”

“No, because they come through Mary Beth.” So far no one had asked her about Ben or hearing from him, and she had volunteered nothing. “I think Papa believes I'm interested in Philip now and have forgotten Ben, but Mama knows differently, and I'm afraid she'll tell Papa.”

So far neither Maeleen nor Mama had said anything, or Papa would surely have issued an ultimatum now that Ben was back in Boston. She bit her lip as Amanda began to pace across the room and back.

“This is a dilemma. I'm sorry Papa disapproves. If I didn't love Charles so much, I'd tell you to forget Benjamin and concentrate on Philip. If you and Ben are meant to be, somehow it will work out.” She narrowed her eyes and furrowed her brow in the way she did as a child when thinking or developing a plan.

Hope rose in Amelia's heart. That look was quite familiar. Many times Amanda had come up with a solution to get Amelia out of trouble. Surely this time would be no different.

She stopped her pacing in front of Amelia. “I can't think of anything yet, but I'll discuss it with Charles. We'll come up with something we can say to Papa or find a way for you and Ben to see each other while he's here.”

Amelia stood and hugged her sister. “I knew you would help me. Between you and Mary Beth, a solution will be found.” Amanda had not let her down. Her love and loyalty still held despite her marriage and being away from the family.

Amanda laughed. “Oh, so Mary Beth is in on this too. I understand that Andrew Farnsworth may be asking for her hand in marriage.”

Boston might be a large city, but their social circle was like a small town and everyone knew everyone else's business. Amelia shook her head. “I suppose everyone knows about it. Andrew is speaking to Mr. Haynes today, and Mary Beth truly loves him.”

Amanda clapped her hands. “That is wonderful. Mrs. Farnsworth and Mother Bishop serve on many of the same committees, so Mary Beth and I will have great fun together. I am surprised, however, that her parents are willing to let her stay in Boston.”

“I'm not. I think they understand her situation and Ben's even more because they left home so many years ago to travel to Kansas and become ranchers.”

Amanda tapped her lips with her forefinger. “I'm going to speak with Grandma. Being Papa's mother, I imagine she still has some influence over him, and from what I've gathered in conversations I had with her when Charles courted me, she is quite the romanticist herself. I'll speak with her tonight after our family gathering.”

“Oh, I hadn't thought of that. She'd be perfect to help Papa and Mama to understand.” Once again Amanda had come through with a solution. Although it wouldn't completely resolve the problem, it might be enough of an influence to orchestrate some changes in attitude and opinion.