Authors: Kathryn Cushman
Tags: #FIC042000, #FIC026000, #Self-realization in women—Fiction, #Amish—Fiction, #Tennessee—Fiction
“You think?” Rosemary stared at her, completely still, just waiting. Julie and the girls all sensed it too and looked up, as if waiting for this grand revelation. “I think you have a lot in common with Martha in the Bible. You can choose to either drive yourself crazy, striving for that unattainable perfection, or you can remember what you’re doing it all for.”
“That all sounds very wonderful, but I don’t think my goals are unattainable. They just require discipline and hard work. That’s my job . . . and I know what I’m doing it for—my daughter—who needs my example so she can learn to apply herself fully to have the kind of future she wants to have.”
“What kind of future do you want to have, young lady?” Rosemary turned her attention to Angie.
Angie’s face turned bright red, and she suddenly became very interested in her stitching. She shrugged. “I don’t know. A good college and good job, I guess.”
Rosemary nodded. “I see. Well, it seems to me like the two of you have it all figured out, then.” She went back to rocking.
Susan waited for her to say more, but she just rocked and stared. Somehow, she knew there was an indictment in that silence. But it didn’t matter what some small-town woman whose life was sewing quilts thought. She knew nothing of the real world.
The day did not get any cooler, and even as the sun began to dip, the heat remained unbroken. Worse, the stove still radiated warmth from dinner, and now steam rose from the sink as Julie and Susan finished washing the last of the dishes. Neither had talked about the morning’s spat, and Julie hoped it was behind them.
Handing over the evening’s final plate, Julie wiped sweat off her brow and said, “Well, on the bright side, think of how much money people pay for a steam room. We’re getting the spa treatment for free here.”
“Somehow I’m not feeling the rejuvenating effects one would expect from such treatments.” Susan chuckled and put the plate in the cupboard.
From outside came a shuffle of footsteps. “Evening, ladies,” said Gary, appearing at the screen door. Susan waved him in, but he said, “As I can feel the heat coming off the stove from here, I think I prefer to stay outside. That should start cooling down soon, but I thought I might offer an evening ride. Feel the wind on your faces. It’s the least I could do after this morning’s wonderful breakfast.”
“That does sound nice.” Susan closed the cupboard door and leaned against the countertop. “But I’d feel guilty going out for a ride, with the kids all down at the observatory working on their school project.”
Julie had been pondering Brian, and the observatory, and all of the kids’ reactions since breakfast this morning. Something was up. Brian should have jumped when Gary asked to see it, and Whitney had certainly never before been in a hurry to spend time with her brother. Yet all of them—including Angie—were all suddenly overwhelmed by a mysterious school project. Whitney had volunteered, “Since Brian has to work on the telescope for his project, Angie and I will go there and do our work, too. That way we’re all together if anyone needs help.”
The whole thing was extremely suspicious.
“Oh, I’m sure they won’t mind if you get out for just a little. They all know how hot it is in here after you’ve cooked a meal. In fact, if it would make you feel better, we can swing down that way and see if any of them want to go for a quick ride with us.”
“I don’t know. It sounds wonderful, really, but there are things . . .” Susan’s voice trailed off and she stared into the distance, as if thinking intently.
Something about the way Susan and Gary were looking at each other made Julie wonder whether it was the ride in the evening air or the company that sounded so wonderful to Susan. “I think a ride is a splendid idea. Let’s get out of here and give this place a chance to cool down.” She grabbed Susan by the arm. “Come along, now.”
Susan was laughing more than protesting, so Gary went into the barn to get the wagon and horse. He emerged a few minutes later. “Ladies, shall we?” He offered a hand up, and Julie discreetly took a step backward so Susan would be the first in. It was probably a juvenile thing to do, but whatever it took to get Susan back into life, she would give it a try.
Gary clucked to the horse, and they took off down the road in the general direction of the creek and the observatory. No one spoke, but an overall feeling of well-being and peace surrounded Julie so closely, she wondered if they all felt it. When was the last time she’d felt this way in her old life?
Just before they reached the top of the hill, Susan said, “I bet the kids wanted to do homework in the observatory because it’s probably a lot cooler down there—it being so close to the creek.”
“That’s likely true.” Gary pulled the horses back to a walk that was so slow, they were barely moving forward. Step by step they finally crested the top of the hill. The lone window of the observatory had a dim light shining out of it, casting eerie shadows through the leaves of the swaying trees.
Gary clucked at the horses once again, and they sped up, becoming noisier in the process. “What are we doing?” Susan asked.
The light in the window of the observatory seemed to flicker and dim. “Just, uh . . . checking out the horses. That’s all.” Gary’s smile was huge as the wagon drew closer to the observatory. “Why don’t you ladies just wait here, and I’ll go see if the kids want to join us?”
“No, let me do it. I’m on the end, and you need to control the horse.” Julie climbed down before he could argue.
She crossed to Brian’s hideaway, pulled the door open, and found all three kids sitting on the floor, a couple of oil lamps in the middle of their circle. The air inside felt cool—amazingly cool. “Hello, everyone. I can see that you are all certainly working hard.”
“Oh, hi, Mom. I didn’t even hear you guys.”
“I’m sure you didn’t.” Each and every kid was showing undivided attention to the notebooks and textbooks in front of them.
Right.
“Aunt Susan, Gary, and I are going for a little buggy ride, trying to cool off a bit. We stopped by to see if you wanted to come with us.”
The kids all looked at each other, then quickly back down toward their books. “Well, we’ve really got a lot of homework this week.” Whitney kept her eyes focused on her notebook.
“Yeah. Mom must have had one of her talks with Charlotte,” offered Angie. “Or something.”
“Well, good for you three. Way to keep at it.”
“Sure.”
“Sure.”
“Yeah.”
The words followed her out the door. She bit her lip, trying to keep a straight face as she walked back out to the buggy. “The kids all seem rather overwhelmed with schoolwork, so they’ve declined.”
“Wow. Charlotte must finally be getting serious about their studies. I’m glad to see it.” Susan fanned herself with her hand.
“Yes, they certainly do seem industrious,” Gary said and, catching Julie’s eye, gave a wink. “Looks like it’s just us old folks for tonight’s ride, then.”
Gary clucked his tongue, and the horse began its leisurely stroll. Just the little momentum stirred a breeze, and when the buggy pulled into the shadow of some poplars, it almost felt cool to Julie. On they went, down past the schoolhouse, then to the far end of the property before heading down a back driveway and out onto the main road. A few cars rushed by, but the evening was quiet and the sound of tree frogs and cicadas began to fill the night air. Eventually the horse veered down the front drive, returning them all to a stop in front of the farmhouse.
“I’ll let you ladies out here and then go put the horse away.”
“Are you sure?” Susan asked. “We can help you.”
“I know you could and you would, but it’s been a big day for all of you, and I suspect it will be a long and sticky night. Besides, this is man’s work.”
Susan actually giggled as she climbed down from the buggy. “Far be it from me to interfere with man’s work.”
Light suddenly spilled into the area as the door to the shack opened and Kendra came walking out. “Oh, there you are. I’ve been looking for you, Susan. Why don’t you come over, and we’ll talk about what the plans are for next week.”
“Okay.” Susan made one last turn back toward Gary. “Good-bye. And thanks again.”
“My pleasure.” The smile on his face left Julie no doubt that he meant it.
Julie waited until Susan and Kendra had disappeared and closed the door before she walked closer to Gary. She leaned toward him and whispered, “How did you know?”
He snorted. “I was down at the creek trying my hand at gigging frogs last night. I heard the kids whispering and figured they were up to something. So I snuck up the hill and watched for a while. I’ve got to say, that boy of yours is something of a genius when it comes to electrical wiring. There’s not a soul on the production crew that will ever realize that one of their lines has been bootlegged.”
“I hope that someday he will use that genius for good and not for evil.” She laughed.
“Got to admire their ingenuity in the face of the current situation. Fact is, if I were you and Susan, I’d be trying to figure out an excuse to get myself down there, too. Although,”—he rubbed his chin—“I’m guessing you didn’t tell her for a reason.”
“I don’t want to put her in the position of having to lie to anyone, should it get discovered.”
“That’s what I thought, too, which is why I didn’t say anything.”
“Good night.” Julie watched him disappear into the barn, then pivoted on her foot and turned back toward the house. By the time she reached the back steps, she was giggling. Those kids—she had to admire their resourcefulness.
“You’re not going to believe this one.” Susan jogged up behind her.
“What?”
“Next week, Lisa Lee is going to be here! She’s going to tape the entire Friday segment
here
. On site.”
“Oh. Is that good news, then?” Julie thought so, but given the stressed tone of Susan’s voice, she didn’t really think so.
“No. I mean, maybe, but the day we get electricity back, she’ll be here. The queen of perfect domesticity, seeing us after sweating for seven days.”
“Susan, I’m sure she understands that we—”
“First thing tomorrow morning, we’ve got to work on getting those windowsills painted, heat or no heat. We’ve got to make sure this place is perfect.”
Julie looked at her sister-in-law and knew that nothing would ever be perfect enough for Susan. The bar would keep changing and there’d always be one more thing to do, and she would keep working at it until it consumed her.
Maybe tonight’s buggy ride was a sign, though, that she could step back for at least a minute. Julie hoped so. If not, she couldn’t imagine what the next days might bring.
Sunday morning dawned hot and sticky. Even having their mattresses downstairs hadn’t helped that much. Now, after a cool shower, Julie couldn’t help but wish for some sandals to wear to church and wondered how reticent the girls would be this morning. But she heard no complaints, and they all loaded up into the buggy, all wearing long dark skirts and black flats. At least Kendra had loosened the stipulation about wearing heavy work shoes and nylons; she supposed they could be grateful for that.
“Did you notice the cute sundresses that all the girls at church were wearing last week?” Whitney sighed and sat down. “I can’t wait until we can wear cute clothes again.”
“So are you telling me that you actually want to wear a dress? I never thought I’d hear those words come out of your mouth.” Julie looked at her daughter and waited.
Whitney shrugged her left shoulder. “Maybe.” She paused for a minute to think about it, and then said, “Probably not. I just don’t like to stand out. I feel like everyone is looking at us in this.”
Gary climbed up after everyone had loaded in. “Okay, here we go.”
The horses clopped down the road, making a pleasant sound. In spite of the fact they were traveling down a country road, cars still came up behind them at a fairly regular rate. Gary would wave them around if he could see the road ahead was clear.
One particular car came up beside them and began honking, and honking, and honking. It was an old muscle car, painted black, loaded with boys who appeared to be in their late teens. One of them rolled down his window and shouted, “Hey, girls, want to come for a real ride? We got the ride of your life, right here.” More honking followed.
Gary kept the horse moving forward at an even pace. His head never moved to the side, but he did say, “Just ignore them. Don’t give them the satisfaction of a response.”
It took every bit of Julie’s self-control not to jump out of the buggy and onto the car and go after some boys who’d dared to disrespect her daughter and niece. She noticed that Susan had put a hand on Gary’s arm and was squeezing, a sure sign she was facing the same struggle.
“Come on, what ya waiting for?”
Honk. Honk. Honk.
The horse jerked forward, but Gary kept him under control by use of the reins. Another car rounded the curve from the other direction, headed straight for the muscle car. Gary pulled the reins back sharply and said, “Whoa.” The buggy stopped and the car moved forward and pulled in front to avoid being hit by the oncoming car. “Keep on going, fellas, just keep on going,” Gary whispered under his breath.