Alma Mater (18 page)

quickly added, "No disrespect to Frank. He's
a brave man. He just
doesn't have the tools for business."

"Yes, sir."

Euphoric, Charly sang along with the radio the whole way back to
Williamsburg. Vic had returned from her last class, and she and Chris
were sunbathing in the backyard.

"Hey!" He bounded over to them. "I am taking you two to dinner."
"What about the training table? Coach will have a fit."

"I'll be there right on time, if we go now."

The three of them drove out to The Roadhouse and ate clams and
corn chowder until they couldn't eat any more.

By the time Vic dropped him off at the jock dorm, he was giddy
with happiness.

Chris realized Vic was right. She couldn't help but like Charly
Harrison.

_M

ore money than God, and what good does it do him?" demanded Sissy Wallace, her voluminous shell-encrusted purse
on her right arm, hands on her hips.

"Uh-huh." Hojo filed her nails.

Georgia, standing next to Sissy, pointed her finger at Hojo, who
was secure in command central high above them. "Girl, you don't do a
lick of work. Or then again, maybe you do." Her eyes narrowed, her
mauve eye shadow sticking in the creases of her eyelids.

Hojo slammed down her nail file. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"That you're no better than you should be." Georgia smiled falsely.
"Oh, Georgia, you got a mean mouth on you today. Mean reds."

Sissy loved it, of course. "You're jealous of Yolanda. Ha. Jealous of a

cow, and you're taking it out on Hojo."

"I don't have to take that kind of talk."

Before Georgia could embellish her retort, Bunny, followed by
R. J., Vic, Chris, and Jinx, pushed through the door.

Georgia turned her back to Hojo. "Bunny, if you hire trash, you'll
take out trash."

"I beg your pardon?" Bunny steeled herself for a Wallace Moment,
as she called such events.

"Sissy and I walked in here to see Don, and this made-up cow

won't buzz him. Says he's in a meeting. She doesn't know her place."
Georgia pulled out from her cleavage a linen hanky with a G embroi
dered on it. She wore an orange halter top, in a small fit of rebellion as
well as a concession to the heat. It was not a good idea.

"Georgia's being fussy. Aren't we surprised? Hojo was perfectly po
lite," Sissy said, folding her arms over her chest.

R. J. nudged Vic, who tiptoed around the back of the reception
desk, heading toward the meeting room.

Bunny spoke sharply to Hojo, who still held a nail file in her right
hand. "This is a place of business, not a beauty parlor." Then she fo
cused on Georgia and Sissy while Hojo fumed and Jinx and Chris
watched in fascination. "It's not unusual for Don to meet with people
on Friday afternoons. I know that Hojo would never keep you all from
my husband. Even though I am not happy about this filing of the nails
business, he really is in a meeting."

Vic reappeared. "He is."

"Perhaps I can help you all." Bunny smiled.

"We want Donny to get a Cadillac dealership," Sissy sweetly
pleaded. "Then we can drag Poppy down here and make him buy us
both Cadillacs. He won't let either of us drive his white Caddy. We
can't wait any longer. I have been waiting for a Cadillac since I was
twenty-five."

"Fourteen years." R. J. smiled sweetly at Sissy.

"Oh, R. J., you're such a card." Sissy playfully slapped R. J.'s bronzed
forearm.

"Getting a dealership, mmm, that takes some doing. Negotiations.
But I know how much you want your Cadillacs, and beautiful women
deserve Cadillacs. In fact, I think I should get one, too." The sisters
tittered, and Bunny put an arm around each sister's shoulder, gliding
toward the front door. "I will talk to Don about getting two Cadillacs
at a discount. I don't know if he can work it because the Williamsburg
dealer will want something in return, but I will make this my personal mission."

"We knew we could count on you, Bunny," Sissy cooed as Bunny
artfully shoved them out the door, propelling them toward Georgia's
tank of a car.

R. J. checked her watch. "Well just make it."

Bunny left her car, took a set of keys off Don's sales board, and
pushed everyone into a used Jeep Grand Wagoneer that had just been
traded in.

Mignon, standing with a group of friends in front of her school,
didn't recognize her aunt or mother when the red Jeep pulled up
to the curb. She coolly walked toward her mother, not wishing to ap
pear too happy to see her until Vic rolled down her window in the
backseat.

"Creep."

"Vic!" Mignon skipped over, opened the door, sprawling on her
big sister's lap.

"Oh, God," Vic complained loudly. "My legs will be crushed."

"Oh, we are so funny today. I mean I could just die laughing. Hey,
Chris. I'm glad you came back to see us. You could have left the
Weirdo at school. Hi, Jinx."

"Hi, Mignon. Wasn't that Marjorie Solomon you were talking to? I
thought you hated her?"

Mignon slid off Vic, squeezing herself between Chris and her sister as Bunny pulled out into the road. "It was, and you'll never guess
what she did."

"Manners," R. J. said dryly.

Mignon leaned forward and kissed her mother on the cheek. "Hi,
Mom." She kissed Bunny. "Hi, Aunt Bun. Cool wheels. I'll be sixteen in
December."

"Don't start," R. J. warned as Bunny headed back to Surry Crossing. "I could take everyone on field trips if I had this car."

"That's what worries me." Bunny winked as she looked back in the
rearview mirror.

"Okay. I won't drive anyone under pain of death." She stopped
midstream. "Hey, there's Walter Rendell. Slow down, Aunt Bunny. I
want him to see me in the Wagoneer."

"For God's sake." Bunny did, however, slow down.

Mignon waved and then flopped back to the seat. "You'll never
guess what Marjorie Solomon did."

"I can't wait, Mignon. I am sick with excitement," Vic said in falsetto
.

"You are such a twit." Mignon turned her back on Vic, giving
Chris and Jinx her full attention. "Marjorie flashed Buzz Schonfeld."

The name Schonfeld captured Bunny's attention, although she said nothing.

"What do you mean 'flashed'?" Vic reached for the Jesus strap as
Bunny ran over a pothole.

Mignon unbuttoned her blouse, reaching in.

Vic reached around, grabbing her sister's wrists. "Stop. You'll cre
ate nausea."

"I wasn't really going to do it, but she did. She reached right in
there, pulled out that puppy, and shook it at Buzz and Teddy."

"My little brother." Jinx's eyes widened.

"He didn't do anything. He just happened to be leaving the gym
with Buzz. And Marjorie's got a set of bazookas!"

"Dear, what constitutes a bazooka?" R. J.'s silvery tone floated to
the backseat.

"Mom, like so big if she jumped off a rock, she'd give herself a
black eye. Like so big she can hold pencils underneath them. Like so
big if she was as tall as Vic and ran into you, you'd be blind. Blinded by
an erect nipple."

"Mignon, that's quite enough."
R.
J. put her hand to her eyes.
Bunny started laughing. "Now, Mignon, honey, tell me more about
erect nipples."

"Bunny, don't encourage her." R. J. was laughing, too.

"She twists her nipples to make them stand up. No lie! She does it
and then walks past the boys. And she has the top of her blouse unbuttoned. Poor Buzz."

"Poor Buzz?" Bunny fed her.

"Boner."

"Mignon!" R. J. was laughing and appalled at the same time.
"In his gym shorts. Grossed me out." Mignon made a face.
"Oh, sure," Vic teased her. "You probably ran for a camera." She

squeezed Mignon's biceps.

Mignon turned around, sitting back properly on the seat. "Oh,
yeah, you spent the summer sucking face with Charly Harrison. The
summer of your erection."

"Actually, it would be the summer of his erection," Bunny said dryly.
"Mignon, you are vile." Vic crossed her arms over her chest.

"1 may be vile, but at least I'm not exposing my breasts. And Coach

had his back turned to Marjorie. I think she needs a breast reduction."
"The breast expert." Vic sighed, but she was laughing, too.

"Yours are perfect." Mignon pursed her lips. "She should copy

yours. Of course, Jinx's are good, and Chris, I haven't seen you naked

yet, but—"

"Mignon, you are quite out of line." R. J. stared at her in the
rearview mirror.

"Oh, Mom, it's not like nobody knows what everybody has. We're all naked in gym class, and some of those poor girls need help. I am going to become a plastic surgeon and get rich, rich, rich."

"My sister, the boob doctor."

"I could do worse." Mignon basked in the attention. "Proctology."
By now they were all laughing so hard Bunny struggled to stay on
the road.

"I
was unaware that you paid so much attention to breasts. Mother,
maybe we need to rethink Mignon's direction in life," Vic said.

"Ha ha." She closed her eyes then opened them. "But the best part
was watching Buzz try to hide his you-know and walk at the same
time."

R. J. turned to Bunny. "I don't remember having these conversa
tions when we were her age."

"We didn't, sweetie. You were much too repressed. In fact, I'm
flat-out amazed that you produced those two fine specimens in the
backseat. I assume you only did it twice."

Mignon lurched forward, one hand on Bunny's seat, one on R. J.'s.
"Aunt Bunny, was Mom really repressed? Like Episcopalians?"

"We are Episcopalians." R. J. shook her head.

"Your mother has remained a proper lady."

"Gee, we'll have to make up for it." Mignon pinched her mother's
earlobes.

"Chris, I apologize for my unruly child."

"Mrs. Savedge, she's a one-woman show." Chris smiled.

"The Gong Show,"
Vic stated.