All the Things You Never Knew (15 page)

Rose opened her mouth to say something then closed it. Leon looked so sad with each word he spoke that it pains her. He had told her to be strong for his story might inflict pain on her, but it’s actually his expression that hurts. She can see the anger in his eyes when he spoke of his lordship and his father.
“Leon.” She drew him slowly into her arms and held him. “I’m so sorry,” she said, cupping his face. Her lies must have tormented him, too. “Was this why you have been opposed to me marrying Lansing?” she asked him out of curiosity, though she was hoping for something more. The last time he told her not to marry his lordship she thought he was mad or miraculously by any chance,
jealous
. Now she knows the reason why.
“Part of it,” he answered, wrapping his arms around her.
That made her smiled and snuggled into his shirt. He attracts her so much that every negative nerves in her turned positive. She can’t deny her feelings anymore. She will never again.
“What about the rest of it if that’s only a part of it?” Rose asked, gazing into his eyes.
She wanted to know–she
needs
to know it as much as he wants to know about her and Lansing. She will share that part with him but only after he shares his part.
“Just because…” he trailed off and shook his head. “No. I can’t say it again. I feel like I’ve said it too much and you’re still thinking it a lie.”
“What?” Rose was lost. What is it that he had said? “Are you sure? So far you’ve only told me about how you’re a by-blow with Lord Lansing’s father killing your parents, and–”
“It was way before those things,” he interjected, and then sighed. “It was…a couple days pass.”
“Was it?” Why couldn’t she recall? It’s probably because he never really talked openly with her. Everything he says always drifted off to something else. It annoys her to have to wait on his slowness. She just wants him to throw out all those dreadful things from the past and not burden himself with it anymore.
“Are you serious or are you playing dumb with me?” he asked, staring up at her.
Rose chuckled at his question and lean to whisper in his ears, “You can always remind me.”
His quiet laughter brightens her heart and she beamed at him with her most alluring smile.
“I love you,” he said, lowering his head to kiss her along the neck, sending heats through her body.
“Y-you’re lying,” she replied incredulously as he kisses her along the jaw. “You don’t–”
“I do,” he said, kissing to her shoulder. “That…that is why I haven’t yet killed Lansing. I was afraid I will hurt you even more than I did before.”
“You will,” she has to admit that, though now she won’t really care much. Whatever happens to Lord Lansing doesn’t matter. All she cares about is him.
“Rose, I have to tell you something else, too,” he murmured, stopping his burning kisses and looking up at her again.
“Yes?” she asked, holding his gaze. “What is it?”
“I am going to finish up with Lansing and move on to find more of the killers that were with his father on that day of my parents’ death,” he told her. “I will be leaving London really soon.”
“You’re…leaving?”
No
, she cried in her head.
No. Not more good-byes. No. Please, no.
His expression turned austere and he answered, “Yes. After this week if I succeed, I will be gone forever.”
“For…ever?” Her lips trembled as she spoke the words and tears trickled out of her eyes.
“Damn it, Rose. No,” he flustered suddenly, wiping at her cheeks with the back of his hand. “Don’t cry. Please, don’t cry. Your tears are not worth my leaving.”
How dare he say such thing? His leaving means everything.
“I–Why?” she asked, her voice shaky with sobs. She didn’t think she would cry but it’s all over the limit that she can bear. He’s always leaving her again and again with not much of a good reason. It’s like history playing again. God, she fears its role but it’s kicking in.
“Because I have to,” he answered quietly. “I must.”
“What about me?” She can’t let him leave her again.
Good-bye, Rose!
The words from the past echoed in her head. There’s no way she will tolerate it again. “Don’t you want me? How am I to live–”
“I want you!” he cut in, holding her close. “I want you. I just can’t have you.”
“And why ever not?” He has to give her a clear reason. She needs to know his thoughts–everything that runs in his mad head. God, he’s driving her insane.
“Because I’m not safe for you–not until everything’s settled.”
Well, that would take years. She’s not going to wait.
“I don’t give a mind!” she snapped angrily. “I want to be with you. I don’t want to be with anyone else but you.”
It made her feel really foolish to reveal her feelings but it’s either now or never.
“I could spare Lansing for you but he’s such an ass that I can’t tolerate it,” he said coolly that it drove Rose to fury.
“Why would I need you to spare him for me? I said I don’t love him. Plus his father killed your parents. I won’t accept that.”
“But you two…” he paused in hesitation and then went on, “Well, I don’t want you to bear a child who’s going to live without a real sire to support him.”
“W-what?”
Oh, darn it!
Did he think she’s…No, that’s totally outrageous.
“Lansing and you…
did it
, right? I have to at least be honorable and let him see his child before–”
“You are totally crazy, Leon!” she replied madly, turning away from him. “How can you even think of such a thing?”
“Well, you–”
“I didn’t ‘
do it’
with Lansing!” she blurted to not have him continue on about it. She knows that she had caused him to think so, but she’s mending away that thought.
“You didn’t?” He sounded unconvinced by her words, but she shook her head.
“I didn’t,” Rose said with a sigh. “I-I only said that to…to get you to open up on how you feel.”
Somewhat that got a curse out of him, “The hell you did!” He releases her from his arm and sat up, pounding his forehead.
“Leon.” She sat up along with him and touched his shoulder. “Leon, what’s–”
“I’m a complete idiot!” he said. “Damn! Blast it all!”
“I’m–I’m sorry,” she whispered, pressing her cheek against his back. “I didn’t mean to get you mad.”
“I’m not mad,” he answered. “I’m just feeling like an ass right now for having to–never mind it.”
Rose smiled against his back and wrapped her arms around his waist. “Don’t lie to me. You sound angry. I know you are. I guess I went a little overboard that day. I will take everything back if that’s what it takes to make you happy.”
He slid his hands over hers and said, “No. It won’t satisfy me. You have to tell me the real reason why you did it?”
“To get you to open up,” she said again. “I know you will shut me out forever if I don’t give you a little something to consider and fight back.”
“No,” he said, turning to look at her. “Tell me why you lie about loving Lansing and having your engagement consummated before–”
“Because I want you to be jealous!” she blurted shockingly.
Curse him for that
. “Because I want you to care.”
“I do care!” he bellowed. “I do!”
Gosh, she’s not going to turn this into an argument.
“Leon,” she started, choosing her words carefully. “I–I’ve decided that I want to be with the person that I love. That person I love isn’t Lansing. I can’t imagine life with him at all. Although I’ve tried and thought it well to be a success, everything always deflates at the end. The image of him and I becomes the image of you and I. I–”–she shook her head despairingly and closed her eyes as she let the words slip out– “I love you so much. I can never ever let anyone else replace you in my heart. You can have anyone, be with anyone; I don’t care. In my heart, you will always be mine. I want you, Leon. I need–”
To Rose’s surprise, Leon pin her back down on the bed and claimed her mouth taking every breath out of her. She submitted without hesitation and savored his lips on her. Their tongues entwined and dances along a rhythm of passion and desire.
Before Rose even knew it, her hands had slipped down to Leon’s breeches and snap the button loose. She could feel Leon doing the same with the buttons down the back of her nightgown and broke the kiss to help him by throwing it off her head revealing herself.
She should be ashamed but with Leon, how could she resist?
“You’re quite determined,” he smiled, running his gaze down her body.
“Be quiet!” she laughed, rolling on top of him. “Take off that shirt before I go mad!”
He chuckled and did so obediently, revealing his broad shoulders and masculine feature. She has never seen anyone as big or beautiful. He was like the very image of the Greek God Adonis, strong and muscular in every turn. She can’t imagine at all what it would be like if him–down there– was to be like his well-shaped body and…
“What are you thinking?” Leon asked, interrupting her thoughts.
“What?” How long had she been musing out?
“Should we carry on?” he inquired with a rise of his brows. “Or are you afraid?”
Afraid?
The word sounded ridiculous. She had dream of this.
With a seductive grin, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him again, letting her hands roam free on his body as he did the same with hers, touching places where she shouldn’t allow him.
“Rose,” Leon murmured breathlessly against her lips. “I think we have to get on with this a little faster.”
He pulled back from her desiring mouth and shed off the last of his hessian and breeches, exposing himself in full view.
The last thing she wanted to see was down there, but her eyes trailed enticingly to it anyway. She nearly gasped out loud to see such a manly creation.
Could God have created anything more beautiful than her Adonis?
Rose only hope now that she will have what it takes to satisfy his needs.

Leon was surprised to see the amusement in Rose as she scans him over with her eyes. He had thought for her to be terrified and retreat to keep her chastity before it’s too late.
But was her virtue still intact?
There were still some doubts that lingered in his mind. She’s

taking him so smooth and willingly that it was hard for him to believe that Lansing didn’t take her virtue and that everything was a lie.

“Leon!” She rose up and pulled him eagerly down to her, cutting the thought out of his head.
If he wants to know whether Rose was telling the truth or not, he will have to test it out now and see for himself.
“Oh, Leon,” Rose moaned in pleasure as Leon bent his head to claim her breast in his mouth, teasing and flicking her nipples with his tongue.
She was clutching onto his back so tightly that Leon fear he’s going to get all marked up by the end of their lovemaking.
“Rose,” he groaned, as he trailed small kisses down from her breasts to her nicely shaped hip and deeper down.
“Leon.”
He feels he shouldn’t do this but Rose has sparked a flame in him that is too strong to burn out. Besides, he has been waiting for this. He has been longing to have this fiery moment with Rose–and Rose
alone
. Never in his right mind had he ever dream of being with another woman but her. It drives him mad to have that lingering thought of that bastard Lansing doing this to Rose, making her cry out and pleasure and clutch on to him like it’s the end of the world.
“Please, Leon,” he heard her beg as he trail his lips to kiss her thighs and then to the most intimate part of her body.
“No,” he heard himself say, dazed from her sweet scent. He has to taste her. God, he has to.
“Leon!” she cried in startled as his tongue stroke her. “What are you…”
Her protest to his action soon turns into cries of yearning and pleasures that she allowed him to continue to have his way with her, hanging on to keep his head there.
She was the first and will be the last that he will ever experiment this on. After tonight, Leon knew that no matter what happens, he can never leave Rose again.
“Leon…” Rose cried out, stroking his hair. “I’m…”
Leon suddenly stopped and raises his head up to look at her with a lazy smile.
She was gorgeous with her eyes closed looking all warm and hot with desire. Her milky skin glows in the moonlight, her breast so beautifully shaped and build just rightly for him.
Her eyes suddenly popped open in astonishment when she realizes that he had stopped, followed by a sudden blush when she saw him staring at her so enchantingly.
He can’t let her enjoy the pleasure alone. He has to be with her.
“Leon–”
Before she can say more or less, Leon leap up and take her mouth once more before setting himself at her entrance and slowly drove in.
She gasped and clutched at his shoulders as he slowly pushed himself in some more.
“You have never done this?” he asked her to be sure that she was still innocent as she had claimed.
Infuriation marked her brows as she looked at him and arched up, pulling him down, forcing him to thrust deeply into her, making her cried out in what seems to be hurt and pain.
“Rose!” Leon withdrawn suddenly at her cry, but she pulled him right back in.
“Don’t!” she cried, holding onto him. “Don’t stop now! Don’t leave me!”
He could see that she was wincing with a light sparkle of tears from the corner of her eyes.
She
was
innocent!
He had hurt her. She was telling the truth.
Thank God!
Why can’t she just tell him to take it slow rather than force himself into her to prove her innocent? Now she’s hurt and it makes him feel guilty to be the cause of it.
“I would never leave you…again.”
He wiped the corner of her eyes and settles himself more comfortably between her legs and begins to plunge in more slowly to ease the pain.
“You didn’t have to do that to give me an answer, you know? It’s to hurt a lot the first time,” he said, leaning down to kiss her forehead.
“I know, but you doubted me,” she murmured. “I–I have to prove it to you. It won’t kill me to take a little pain.”
“Well, it kills
me
to have you in pain,” he answered, thrusting deeper now that he had broken through her barrier.
Rose sighed into his neck and whispered, “Just love me.”
And he did, meeting her cries with each thrust and kissing her senseless. This is what he should have done years ago. He still can’t believe what a lucky bastard he was to still have this opportunity with Rose when she should really be wedded off and experiencing it with her husband. But then he had decided something else. Something most dangerous.
“Rose.” He gave Rose one last kiss before they reach the climax of their love and collapse on top of her; they both panting with full pleasure and delight.
“This is so…wonderful,” Rose said, stroking his hair when they finally caught their breath. “I love you, Leon.”
Leon smiled at her words and turned to kiss her breast. He loves her too, more than words can say. Is that even possible? It has to be because he had never felt this strongly toward anyone.
“Rose,” he whispered, rising up to look into her eyes.
“Yes?” she asked, cupping his face in her hands.
Leon doesn’t know whether it’s right to say this or not but he can’t let this moment slip. He has to ask her this question. It may be most dangerous for Rose but he has to or it’s going to be too late and the dream he has had for so long would shatter.
“Will you marry me?” he managed to break out. “Will you just please marry me instead of Lansing?”