All Fired Up (Kate Meader) (36 page)

Sure, let’s talk about food.
“He told me then. At first I thought he was lying—he was one for the tall tale and he was drunk, morning and night, but the more I saw of you, the more I realized it was true. I wanted to reach out but I was only thirteen. You were the bomb. Successful, famous, you had everything. Why would you be interested in some snotty-nosed teen you didn’t know from Adam?”

Jack didn’t fight him on it. He knew Shane’s instincts had been right.

“I was already interested in cooking, but once I started keeping tabs on your career, I decided that was my future, too. I wasn’t thinking that it would be a way to get to know you. I didn’t have a plan. It just made me feel closer to you. My hot-shit brother.”

Through the abuse and constant put-downs, he had held onto that illusory connection. It had sustained him through some crappy times. Even his illogical hatred of Jack for not being there to save Shane had sustained him.

Shane’s pain must have been etched on his face because Jack’s next words were softer. “When you got older, why didn’t you look me up?”

Shane sighed. “I wanted to, but he had already contacted you looking for money. He said you didn’t want anything to do with him, and while I knew you didn’t even know about me, it was out there. He’d set the terms and dirtied the water. The first thing you thought when you found out was what was I after.” But that wasn’t the only reason. Really, he was scared shitless that Jack wouldn’t be interested.

Guilt clouded Jack’s heavy-lidded eyes. “But I’ve gotten over it pretty fast, Shane. You know me well enough by now to see that I blow up and calm down in all of five minutes.” He stood up quickly, too quickly, and gripped the table for balance. For a moment, Shane worried he might pass out, but instead Jack flipped on the tap at the sink and wet the back of his neck.

“So what changed your mind? Why are you telling me now?”

“Cara. I couldn’t lie to her anymore.” Lying to her was worse than lying to himself. She was as much a part of him as his scars and bruises, and her bravery demanded he match her.

“I don’t even know where to start with that. I mean, for shit’s sake, Shane. Married! Did you do that to get closer to me?”

A bolt of rage shot through Shane’s chest. “Right, because getting my long-lost brother’s fiancée’s sister drunk and”—Jack opened his mouth and Shane raised a condemning hand—“convincing
her
to ask
me
to marry her is such a brilliant plan. That doesn’t make a lick of sense.”

Jack looked a touch shamefaced at his accusation. “Jesus, Shane, you’ve wasted a lot of time.”

“It hasn’t been wasted,” Shane said, truly believing it. He had to because the alternative—that he could have been a part of something real years ago—didn’t bear thinking about. “I was perfecting my craft, learning to be the best. I wanted to get to know you as an equal, not as a giddy apprentice or some user with my hand out looking for favors. I couldn’t show up without something to offer.”

His brother scrubbed his hand through his hair, just like Packy, and Shane looked away.

“I don’t need you to offer anything. You’re family. You’re my family. That’s more than enough.”

His heart filled to a dangerous bursting, making his blood surge and his hands shake. He took a sip of the whiskey to calm his nerves. The glass was empty. He didn’t want to argue with Jack, who always thought he knew best. He didn’t want to admit that he might have strategized all wrong and played his cards poorly. Better to push that away and leave it for another day. For now, Jack knew, and it felt like they had a future, but without Cara it wouldn’t be anywhere near as bright as it could be.

He felt a sting to the back of his skull and it took a moment to register that Jack had cuffed him a good one.

His brother plopped back in his seat. “That’s for being an idiot.”

Downright fraternal.

The long, satisfying moment of silence that followed was interrupted when Vegas hopped up into Shane’s lap and made a sound like the start-up of an old, broken-down lawnmower. Jack eyed the cat shrewdly and poured them both another drink.

“So. Alzheimer’s,” his brother said, setting the bottle down. “Let me guess. Genetic?”

“One or both of us have a degenerative mental condition to look forward to.”

Jack raised his glass. “Thanks, Dad.”

Shane started laughing, and God, it felt good.

Chapter 21

The heavy knock on the door sent a corresponding
thump thump
through Shane’s bloodstream, but when he pulled it open, disappointment set in. Only Jack. A week ago, the thought of his brother showing up unannounced at his door would have thrilled Shane. Since moving to Chicago, he’d had plenty of time to get used to the annoying parts of Jack’s personality—the pushy, know-it-all, paternal aspect he exhibited with everyone—but having to put up with him as an official relative was more than he could bear, especially in his current mood. Bloody families.

“What?” Shane snapped.

“Already bored with me, bruv?” Jack asked, his voice tinged with that British mockery he practiced so well.

Shane stood back to let him in, not that Jack needed an invitation. When he wasn’t pumping Shane for information about LBJ (Life Before Jack), he was being annoyingly chipper about the whole Cara situation. Which was a disaster.

All his calls went straight to voice mail. Lili told him she’d gone to New York to decompress and visit with friends and Jack told him to give her time.
This is Cara we’re talking about,
he reasoned.

Yes, it was. Cara, the woman he loved and wanted to hold and explain what an arsehole he’d been. The situation he’d found himself in might have appeared insurmountable, but he could have found a way. Only now could he finally admit that his tricky subconscious had spent his entire life planning this meeting with Jack. If he had been honest from the beginning, and shared that part of himself with her, then he wouldn’t be in this mess. But all she could see was his heart-shattering betrayal.

Now Jack stood before him, not exactly smug, but cheerful enough that Shane wanted to punch him, to hell with the consequences. His brother took a seat on the ratty sofa, wearing that look that said he had all these fabulous memories of sex with Lili. Hooray for him. Bastard.

“Haven’t heard from her,” Jack said as Vegas jumped into his lap and made himself at home.

“Didn’t ask,” Shane said morosely.

“Still can’t believe she asked you to marry her.”

Of all the amazing things that had transpired the last few weeks, this was the part Jack had the biggest problem with. That Cara—rigid, buttoned-up, hardwired-for-control Cara—had actually done the asking. Shane tried to take comfort in the notion that maybe Jack didn’t know Cara nearly as well as he thought he did. It was about the only comfort he could find in it all.

“Sure, I’m hard to resist,” he said, trying to dial up his usual insouciance and missing by a country mile.

Jack made a noise of disbelief. “So you didn’t think of saying, ‘Hey, that’s a great idea but how about we get to know each other first?’”

They’d already had this conversation but it didn’t stop Jack from replaying it like a broken record. His brother had figured out fairly quickly the shape of Shane’s buttons and he was catching up on twenty-five years of sibling torture.

Shane delivered his most skeptical look. “Are you telling me you didn’t fall madly for Lili the minute you saw her? That you didn’t know that she was the one?”

“I might have fallen hard but that doesn’t mean I was dragging her down the aisle a few hours later.”

Shane snorted. “Not for want of trying.”

Jack gave that lazy smile of his. He couldn’t deny it. “
Colpo de fulmine.
The thunderbolt. The DeLuca women are not for the faint of heart.”

Shane sighed. “If she’s amazing, she won’t be easy—”

“If she’s easy, she won’t be amazing,” Jack finished.

Shane’s mind reached for the rest of it.
If she’s worth it, you won’t give up. If you give up, you’re not worthy.
There was another line but it existed in a fuzzy place on the edge of his consciousness.

Jack was speaking again. “You know if I could make some changes, you’d be my best man, right?”

Shane stopped cold in the act of grabbing a couple of craft beers from the fridge. He didn’t know, but Jack looked like he was going to explain.

“I’ve known Laurent for years, and the other people in the wedding party…Well, I can’t exactly throw someone out to give you a spot.”

Shane shifted uneasily. “I never expected that.”

Jack leaned back and pulled at a loose string in the couch’s tweed. “But I’d like us to do something together. Get away for a couple days. What do you think?”

“What about work? And your wedding?” It was only a week away and there must be a ton to do, especially with the wedding planner out of the picture.

“I’m the boss, and while I know you think you’re indispensable, we actually managed without you when you took your ballerina dive on the rugby field. You’ll be back in time to make the cake.” He smiled, so easy and natural, like he found long-lost brothers every day of the week. “Pack a bag. I’ll pick you up at two.”

Shane had something to do first. It wasn’t going to solve anything but the itch to take action was making his skin break out in a rash. “Where are we going?”

Jack smiled slyly as he headed to the door. “Just some place we can kick back, get trashed, and talk about our feelings.”

*  *  *

Abandon all hope ye who enter here.

That may as well have been carved into the Chihuly glass sculpture in the Bellagio lobby because Cara had finally realized her problem.

She was a completely spineless sucker.

How else could she explain why she had returned to the scene of the crime? When Lili had said she’d prefer a little sister time instead of some blow-out bachelorette party, Cara had grasped at it. But Las Vegas? What was she thinking?

For once, Lili was the organized one, with massage and nail appointments that usually fell outside her wheelhouse. And for once, Cara was grateful to have the load lifted from her shoulders.

Your shoulders are my favorite part of you.

Pfft.

“So Jack’s okay with you gallivanting off to Vegas four days before the nuptials?” Cara asked while the very efficient nail girl jabbed a stick into her cuticles.
A little higher, honey. Aim for the eyes.

Lili smiled. “It’s good to spend some time apart. Make sure he appreciates me.”

“Oh, he appreciates you. You’re very lucky, Lili. I know I wasn’t always so supportive.”

“Well, when you think someone is just the most perfect example of sex-on-legs, it’s hard to see the rest. You know how difficult it was for me to see beyond Jack’s, um, assets.” Her saucy smile faded. “But sometimes, it can take something big to see that maybe it’s not just about looks and hotness. That there’s a beating heart underneath all that sexy.” She huffed out a breath, and Cara felt her own body go stiff in preparation for another see-reason speech.

“So Shane handled it all wrong,” Lili said, “but he was working with what he had.”

Jack and Lili had tried to advocate for Shane, and Cara knew the man had some feelings for her. But she could never be sure of his motives for marrying her, and in truth, it was his secret snip of the marriage bond that had flattened her. She had thought they had something special but now every moment they had spent together was tinged with suspicion.

He wanted connections, roots, all the stuff she had been running from forever. He wanted to be a DeLuca and a Kilroy, and boy, were they going to love him. Taking in waifs and strays was par for the course with her family; they could pick and choose the winners and not worry about the natural-born ones who failed to live up to the Italian code.

Shane didn’t need her now that he had Jack and her family.

In the face of Cara’s silence, Lili went on. “I can’t believe you didn’t have any clue. That he didn’t even hint at it.”

In those words, Cara heard her sister’s own self-recrimination that she hadn’t magically figured out her older sister had been starving herself as a lifestyle choice for the last fifteen years.
No, not a lifestyle choice,
her internal therapist rebuked.
Anorexia is an illness.

“He never wanted to talk about himself. I knew about his father being a bully, but as for the rest…” Her stomach lurched in memory of how Shane had been hurt by his father. Jack’s father. “I don’t know, Lili. If he’s going to lie about something so fundamental, how can I be sure that any of it was real?”

“Maybe if you answered the phone the next time he calls. Listened to one of his voice mails…”

Cara held up her hands, an action that did double duty in halting her sister’s speech and allowing her to admire the pleasure-pink frosted tips. “There’s nothing to talk about. Ancient history.” Moving her hands under the nail dryer, she raised her most determined gaze to meet Lili’s. No more self-pity. That look was so aging on her.

“Get your shoes on, Liliana. Tonight, I’m looking for my next ex-husband.”

Two hours later, her sister emerged from the bathroom of their plush hotel room to Cara’s gasp. The jewel tones of her ruby-red sheath picked up the natural shimmer of her olive skin and her sexy heels accentuated her shapely legs, making her whole body undulate in a sensual wave. Her hair was still as crazy as ever—no salon could manage that—but she was so gorgeous that Cara could only breathe her appreciation.