Alice & Dorothy (14 page)

Dr Weller put his hands up. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I had to ask. Try to take a deep breath and calm down.”

“I
am
calm,” Alice said. It’s just a stupid question.”

“Alright,” Dr Weller said. “Forget I asked. It’s not important.” He closed the folder and clipped his pen to the clipboard. “I would like to see you in the morning. I’ll schedule a time, and we can get you on a little Thorazine just to take the edge off. You shouldn’t need a sedative with it though, thankfully. And let’s keep up with the Naloxone to flush the last of those nasty opioids out of your system.”

“Perfect,” Alice said. “
More
drugs.”

“Well, these ones will help you get back on track. In the meantime we can do some talk-through sessions, and maybe we can get a better picture of what’s going on in that noggin of yours.”

“Whatever,” Alice said again.

Dr Weller said a quick goodbye and left the room. Alice got out of bed and stretched. The Thorazine shot made her feel gummy inside, like they’d cracked her head open and poured a litre of milk over her brain. And she didn’t know why she’d bothered to tell the Doctor about her dream; if anything they’d be watching her more closely now that they thought she was a genuine wackjob.

Another time, another place, she might actually consider sticking around and seeing what they had to say about the mess she’d made of her life. But there was a body sitting in a car somewhere. Surely it was found by now. Which meant the cops had a murder on their hands. It was only a matter of time before they tracked her down. Maybe they’d talk to Rabbit, and maybe he’d give her up. Had she taken an ambulance to the hospital? She didn’t even know. Knowing Rabbit, he probably ditched her at a bus stop or something to be found by strangers. She wondered if he’d cum before he bothered to wrap her up and dump her off.

Then there was Dorothy.

She’d felt the connection to the girl the moment she’d walked onto the ward—short brown hair, soft eyes and skin, a dusting of freckles across her nose. Alice wasn’t a lesbian, but she had been around long enough to realize it was really a person’s insides that you were attracted to. Like Rabbit, kind of, he was a scrawny white kid with a lot of drugs and guns hanging around the house. But he’d always been a nice guy. Even if it was because Alice had great tits and would fuck for dope.

Dorothy was different though. Alice was attracted to her cherubic face. But the girl seemed to need Alice, for whatever reason, and that feeling of connection was really doing good things for Alice. When she broke out of the hospital, she’d have to at least ask if Dorothy wanted to come. The girl probably had some problems, but she didn’t like her treatment in here anymore than Alice herself did, and Alice couldn’t imagine the girl saying no.

They were connected, after all.

Alice got up and went to her door. She scanned the common room and saw Dorothy with her knees up on the couch. Reading. Dorothy caught her eye, beamed a smile, and waved her over. Alice smiled back. The look was infectious. She opened the door and went over to where the girl was sitting.

“How did it go?” Dorothy said, sliding over to make room.

“Meh,” Alice said, shrugging. “More bullshit. I told Dr Weller as much too. I said I wasn’t going to put up with any crap from the staff, and he better not try to knock me out again.” A lie, meant to impress. It accomplished its goal beautifully.

Dorothy’s face lit up. “No way!” she said. “I wish I had the guts to talk to them like that. I probably would have been off my meds a while ago.”

“
Twilight
,” Dorothy said. “It’s pretty good. I found it on the book rack. A girl is in love with a vampire. How cool would that be?”

“Oh,
gross!
” Dorothy said, laughing. She closed the book and swatted Alice playfully with it. “I don’t think that’s what the writer had in mind. Or maybe she did, I dunno.”

Dorothy’s face twisted in mock-panic. She eyed the nurses’ station. Then she shook her head. “I maybe better stay here,” she said. “I don’t want to get in shit.”

“Suit yourself,” Alice said. She walked out of the rec room and into the television area. It was on but nobody was watching it, so she flicked the channel over to the local news station. They were going through football scores. Alice dropped down in one of the reclining chairs and leaned back in it. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Dorothy checking out the nurses’ station. There were two on duty at the moment; one was off working in one of the back rooms and the other was sitting at the desk watching an ongoing game of pool.

Dorothy watched her carefully. A few minutes later fortune smiled on her, because the phone rang and the nurse behind the station turned away for some privacy. Seizing the moment, Dorothy got up and walked over to where Alice was sitting. She had a big grin on her face, like she’d never been bad before. It was a kind of high school rebellion look; Alice had known it a time or two when she was younger and the shine hadn’t warn off of being your own master.

She flopped down in the seat beside Alice and impulsively reached out and squeezed her hand. “So what are we watching’? She said.

“News,” Alice said. The sports ended and a woman with a business casual blouse and tight red hair smiled on the screen. Behind her, a map of the local area flashed on a green screen.

“
The weather for next week will be seasonal with a chance of thunderstorms toward the weekend
,” The woman said. “
We’re keeping an eye on the weather patterns as you know, this is tornado primetime
.”

Dorothy perked up at the mention. Then she chuckled, self conscious. “I’m not supposed to watch the weather channels or any weather news,” she said again.

“Aww, thanks!” Dorothy said. She reached out and rubbed Alice’s shoulder. She gave it a firm squeeze. Her fingers lingered a moment on the hem of her shirt before retreating. Alice smiled. The weather report ended and the anchor came on, sitting behind a nondescript blue desk with the station logo splashed across the front in lights.

“
In local news, police are asking for the public’s help in finding this man’s killer,
” The Anchor said, and Alice felt her heart stop. The man from the blue car appeared in the screen, very much alive in the photo. He was smiling, and standing in front of a barbeque full of sausages. Maybe a kid’s birthday party.
Oh my dear
, a voice in her head whispered. It was not her own.
Why so much fear?

She fumbled with the remote, trying to hit all the buttons at once, but her fingers were rebellious and she knocked the device into Dorothy’s lap.

“You alright?” Dorothy said.

“Change the
chah-hannel
, please,” Alice said. She squeezed her eyes shut.

“…
Police say Greg Haines, fifty-two, a local resident was found brutally shot to death in his car in the Marlborough industrial park early Saturday morning. They are looking for a woman with blond hair in her twenties, of average height and slim build who was seen leaving the area. The woman may be injured...
”

“Please turn it off,” Alice said.

Dorothy grabbed Alice’s hand, and with the other hand she used the remote to flip the channel to
Dancing with the Stars.
“Hey,” she said. “Easy. Take it easy. You’re alright.”

She’s a pretty girl
, the Hater whispered.
Would you hurt her? Commit another murder?

Alice clenched her eyes shut, willing the voice out of her head. The Hater didn’t speak again, but Alice could sense him in there somewhere, lingering like smoke on a warm breath. On the television, minor celebrities were dancing to what Alice could only describe as droning bees set to a human heartbeat. Their voices were warbly and faintly sinister. She couldn’t make out any words though. She thought they might be talking about her.

“You okay now?” Dorothy said. “You look like you’re kind of fading in and out. You want me to get a nurse?”

Alice looked up into Dorothy’s face. She was bathed in soft yellow light. Warm light, like the feeling she always got from heroin. Warm amber blanket of light that wrapped around her soul. That face promised more than love; it promised pure bliss.

“No,” Alice said. “I’ll be fine. Listen. I need to get out of here. As soon as possible. There’s shit I gotta deal with and I can’t do it in here.”

“Oh,” Dorothy said, her eyes clouding for a moment. Disappointment broke out on her face, and Alice fought the urge to kiss it off.

“
Dorothy
,” Alice said. “Do you want to come with me?”

“What?
Where?
”

“Well, I gotta make a stop when we get out,” Alice said. “But after that the open road could be our plaything. I mean, we could go wherever we want to, right? It doesn’t matter. I need a beer, and I need a cigarette. Where I get it, well, it doesn’t matter much to me.”

Dorothy bit her lip.

Alice put a hand on Dorothy’s neck and stroked it gently. She’d been hooking long enough to know how to get a person’s wheels going. It was old hand to her now.

“I would love some company,” she said.

Dorothy looked up at her. She flashed a crazy grin.”Yeah!” she said. “Let’s do it. I’m
totally
in.”

“I’m glad,” Alice said. “Now we just need to figure out a way to get off this floor. I think we can pretty much walk out of the hospital then.”

“Well,” Dorothy said. “I can easily get off the floor. I’m not a flight risk at all. And I think I know how we can get you out of here. Won’t even be a hard thing to pull off.”

“Really?” Alice said.

“Well, yeah,” Dorothy said. “It’s not like this is a prison. I could just leave if I wanted to and none of them could really stop me. Probably wouldn’t even notice me gone ‘til pill time.”

“Okay,” Alice said. Impulsively she leaned in and planted a quick peck on Dorothy’s lips. Dorothy closed her eyes for a moment, shocked, opened her mouth for a longer kiss, and Alice pulled back. The two women stared at each other.

Finally, Alice said: “Tell me.” And Dorothy did.

Dorothy was standing at the water machine. She filled a cup of water and took a drink, and then jumped when the bottle garbled back at her. She tried to breathe deep and calm her nerves, but it didn’t work. She closed her eyes.
A kiss. A sweet kiss, but what did it mean? Did Alice love her?
No, that was ridiculous. They’d only been friends for a short while. And yet the connection was there, she could feel it. Butterflies in her stomach, like she’d been eating grubs in the garden and they were hatching. The thought of Alice’s face and the smell of her hair calmed Dorothy, and she took a deep breath.

You can do this
, she could almost hear Alice say.
Easy as a pie
.
Dorothy turned and walked up to the front desk.
Maybe it is easy for a girl like Alice,
she thought.
Someone brave and beautiful and sharp. But Alice isn’t here. I am. And I’m boring and lame and clunky.
Alice was sitting on the couch pretending to watch television. And waiting.

“Yes?” The duty nurse said. Dorothy had never seen her before. She was young and cow eyed, perfect for what Dorothy was planning to do. Alice had said as much when they were going over the escape plan. If Dorothy stayed calm and acted like she belonged there, the nurse would assume it was true and they’d be home free.

The other part of their plan involved the two of them watching carefully and waiting for just the right moment to strike; a moment when the senior nurse was off busy with something and the new nurse was all alone at the station. Just a couple minutes was all they needed. A bathroom break or a coffee run. They needed to have only one nurse at the station, and they needed someone who might not think to watch the elevator
and
handle a minor crisis at the desk.