Agatha Raisin and the Murderous Marriage

BOOK: Agatha Raisin and the Murderous Marriage
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The Agatha Raisin series
(listed in order)

Agatha Raisin and the Quiche of Death

Agatha Raisin and the Vicious Vet

Agatha Raisin and the Potted Gardener

Agatha Raisin and the Walkers of Dembley

Agatha Raisin and the Murderous Marriage

Agatha Raisin and the Terrible Tourist

Agatha Raisin and the Wellspring of Death

Agatha Raisin and the Wizard of Evesham

Agatha Raisin and the Witch of Wyckhadden

Agatha Raisin and the Fairies of Fryfam

Agatha Raisin and the Love from Hell

Agatha Raisin and the Day the Floods Came

Agatha Raisin and the Curious Curate

Agatha Raisin and the Haunted House

Agatha Raisin and the Deadly Dance

Agatha Raisin and the Perfect Paragon

Agatha Raisin and Love, Lies and Liquor

Agatha Raisin and Kissing Christmas Goodbye

Agatha Raisin and a Spoonful of Poison

Agatha Raisin: There Goes the Bride

 

M. C. Beaton

ROBINSON
London

 

Constable & Robinson Ltd
3 The Lanchesters
162 Fulham Palace Road
London W6 9ER
www.constablerobinson.com

First published in the USA 1996 by St Martin’s Press
175 Fifth Avenue, New York, NY 10010

First published in the UK by Robinson,
an imprint of Constable & Robinson Ltd 2006

Copyright © 1996, 2006 M. C. Beaton

The right of M. C. Beaton to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted by her in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

All rights reserved. This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, hired out or otherwise circulated in
any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

A copy of the British Library Cataloguing in Publication data is available from the British Library

ISBN: 978-1-84529-183-9

Printed and bound in the EU

5 7 9 10 8 6

 
CONTENTS

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

 
AGATHA RAISIN

Agatha Raisin was born in a tower block slum in Birmingham and christened Agatha Styles. No middle names. Agatha had often longed for at least two middle names such as Caroline
or Olivia. Her parents, Joseph and Margaret Styles, were both unemployed and both drunks. They lived on benefits and the occasional bout of shoplifting.

Agatha attended the local comprehensive as a rather shy and sensitive child but quickly developed a bullying, aggressive manner so that the other pupils would steer clear of her.

At the age of fifteen, her parents decided it was time she earned her keep and her mother found her work in a biscuit factory, checking packets of biscuits on a conveyer belt for any faults.

As soon as Agatha had squirreled away enough money, she ran off to London and found work as a waitress and studied computing at evening classes. But she fell in love with a customer at the
restaurant, Jimmy Raisin. Jimmy had curly black hair and bright blue eyes and a great deal of charm. He seemed to have plenty of money to throw around. He wanted an affair, but besotted as she was,
Agatha held out for marriage.

They moved into one room in a lodging house in Finsbury Park where Jimmy’s money soon ran out (he would never say where it came from in the first place). And he drank. Agatha found she had
escaped the frying pan into the fire.

She was fiercely ambitious. One night, when she came home and found Jimmy stretched out on the bed dead drunk, she packed her things and escaped.

She found work as a secretary at a public relations firm and soon moved into doing public relations herself. Her mixture of bullying and cajoling brought her success. She saved and saved until
she could start her own business.

But Agatha had always been a dreamer. Years back when she had been a child her parents had taken her on one glorious holiday. They had rented a cottage in the Cotswolds for a week. Agatha never
forgot that golden holiday or the beauty of the countryside.

So as soon as she had amassed a great deal of money, she took early retirement and bought a cottage in the village of Carsely in the Cotswolds.

Her first attempt at detective work came after she cheated at a village quiche baking competition by putting a shop bought quiche in as her own. The judge died of poisoning and shamed Agatha had
to find the real killer. Her adventures there are covered in the first Agatha Raisin mystery,
The Quiche of Death,
and in the series of novels that follow. As successful as she is in
detecting, she constantly remains unlucky in love. Will she ever find happiness with the man of her dreams? Watch this space!

 
Chapter One

It was a week before the wedding of Agatha Raisin to James Lacey. The villagers of Carsely in the Cotswolds were disappointed that Agatha was not to be married in the village
church but in the registry office in Mircester, and Mrs Bloxby, the vicar’s wife, was puzzled and hurt.

Only Agatha knew that she had no proof that her husband was dead. Only Agatha knew that she might be about to commit bigamy. But Agatha was obsessed with her handsome and attractive neighbour,
James Lacey, and terrified that if she put off the wedding until she found that proof then she would lose him. She had not seen her drunken husband, Jimmy Raisin, in years. He
must
be
dead.

She had chosen the registry office in Mircester because the clerk was old and deaf and totally incurious and she merely had to make statements and fill forms without providing any actual proof,
except that of her passport which was still in her maiden name of Agatha Styles. The wedding reception was to be held in the village hall and pretty much everyone in Carsely had been invited.

But unknown to Agatha, forces were already working against her. Her young, erstwhile friend, Roy Silver, in a fit of malicious pique because he felt Agatha had snubbed him over a good public
relations opportunity – Roy had once worked for Agatha’s public relations firm and had moved to the company which bought Agatha out when she took early retirement – had hired a
detective to see if Agatha’s husband could be found. Roy was possibly as fond of Agatha as he could be of anyone, but when she had solved her last murder case and he had hoped to gain some
personal publicity by being associated with it, Agatha had snubbed him, and such as Roy always felt it necessary to get revenge.

Blissfully unaware of all this, Agatha put her cottage on the market, all ready to move next door into James’s cottage after the wedding. From time to time, little stabs of anxiety marred
her happiness. Although James made love to her, although they were frequently in each other’s company, she felt she did not really know him. He was a retired army colonel, living in the
Cotswold village to write military history. There was a privacy and remoteness about him. They talked about murder cases they had solved together, they talked about politics, about people in the
village, but never about their feelings for each other, and James was a silent lover.

Agatha was a middle-aged woman, blunt, sometimes coarse, who had risen from poor beginnings to become a wealthy businesswoman. Until she retired to Carsely, she had had no real friends, her work
being, she thought at the time, the only friend she needed. So, though possessed of a good deal of common sense and self-honesty, when it came to James she was blind – blinded not only by
love but by the fact that, as she had never been able to let anyone get close to her, his singular lack of communication seemed to her possibly normal.

She had picked out a white wool suit to be wed in. With it she would wear a shady hat of straw with a wide brim, a green silk blouse, high-heeled black shoes, and a spray of flowers on her lapel
instead of a wedding bouquet. At times, she did wish she were young again so that she could be married in white. She wished she had never married Jimmy Raisin and could be married in church. She
tried on the white suit again and then peered closely in the mirror at her face. Her bearlike eyes were too small but could be made to look larger on the great day with a little judicious
application of mascara and eye-shadow. There were those nasty little wrinkles around her mouth, and to her horror she saw a long hair sprouting from her upper lip and seized the tweezers and
wrenched it out. She took off the precious suit, put on a blouse and trousers and then vigorously slapped anti-wrinkle cream all over her face. She had been dieting and that seemed to have taken
care of that former double chin. Her brown hair cut in a Dutch bob gleamed with health.

The doorbell rang. She cursed under her breath, wiped off the anti-wrinkle cream and went to answer it. Mrs Bloxby, the vicar’s wife, stood on the doorstep.

‘Oh, do come in,’ said Agatha reluctantly. She was fond of Mrs Bloxby, and yet the very sight of that good woman with her kind eyes and vague face sent a stab of guilt through
Agatha. Mrs Bloxby had asked Agatha what had happened to her husband and Agatha had said Jimmy was dead, but every time she saw the vicar’s wife Agatha began to have an uneasy feeling that
the wretched Jimmy, despite his rampant alcoholism as a young man, might have somehow survived.

Roy Silver faced the detective he had hired. She was a woman of thirty-something called Iris Harris. Ms Harris – not Miss, bite your tongue – was an ardent feminist
and Roy had begun to wonder if she was any good at her job or if she specialized in haranguing clients on the rights of women. Therefore he was amazed when she said, ‘I’ve found Jimmy
Raisin.’

‘Where?’

‘Down under the arches at Waterloo.’

‘I’d better see him,’ said Roy. ‘Is he there now?’

‘I don’t think he ever moves except to buy another bottle of meths.’

‘You’re sure it’s him?’

Iris looked at him with contempt. ‘Just because I am a woman you think I cannot do my job. Just because –’

‘Spare me!’ said Roy. ‘I’ll see him myself. You’ve done well. Send me the bill.’ And he fled the office before she could lecture him any more.

The light was fading from the sky when Roy paid off the taxi at Waterloo station and then walked towards the arches. Then he realized the folly of not taking Iris with him. He should have at
least asked for a description. There was a young fellow sitting outside his cardboard box. He appeared sober, although Roy found his tattooed arms and shaven head somewhat scary.

‘Do you know a chap called Jimmy Raisin?’ ventured Roy, suddenly timid. The light was almost gone and this was a side of London he usually preferred to ignore – the homeless,
the drunks, the druggies.

BOOK: Agatha Raisin and the Murderous Marriage
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