After the Evil – A Jake Roberts Novel (Book 1) (23 page)

“We didn’t get there in time to save him, the whole
precinct is devastated. Ed was family. We can’t grieve, because the
investigation is ongoing. The funeral is delayed because of the
autopsy.”

That statement hurts. The lump in my throat grows
larger.

“Ed was a father figure to all of us, someone the
whole precinct looked to for guidance, encouragement. He taught me
everything about how to be a good cop. When I fell down, he picked
me up, brushed me off, and sent me out again.”

Michael Gates’ face bursts into my thoughts.

“And that cold-blooded, psychopath murdered him, I
didn’t get to Ed in time...couldn’t save him.”

“The key should be under the––” Harmon says.

Mika gets out of the car.

“I still have one thank you,” she says.

She didn’t feel it was necessary to explain why.
Maybe she would on some other day, an easier day. In her heart, she
knew that she kept it as a reminder of happier times. She also felt
it had some good luck attached to it, because whenever she was with
Jake she always felt safe and protected.

“Are you going to be all right, Harmon?”

He thought about it for a moment.

“Yeah, I’m a big boy. And I’ve got more things to
keep me distracted now that I’m––
the man
.”

He slumped down in the car seat.

“But keep next week open, okay? It will hit me hard
then and I’m going to need a lot of special care.”

Mika blew Harmon a small kiss and waved goodbye.
Since Ed had been so hastily taken away, it seemed more important
than ever to see someone you loved as long as you could. You felt
the longer you kept looking their way, the safer they would be.
Ed’s murder proved no one was safe anymore. Mika watched until
Harmon made the turn at the end of Jake’s street.

There were plenty of people out walking, and traffic
moved briskly along the street. Mika decided to stay out on the
sidewalk for a while and take it all in. She studied the faces and
the surroundings out of habit. All she really wanted the rest of
the night was to find comfort in Jake’s arms. She wondered what his
reaction would be at finding her at his front door. She knocked and
waited but there was no answer. Jake, she knew, was a light
sleeper. She rang the bell and waited for a light to illuminate.
She peeked through the curtain to see if his shadow was
approaching. Finally, she found the key in her purse and slid it
into the lock. The tumblers tumbled, and Mika walked in.

“Jake?”

She reached in the dark for the light switch on the
wall. It was warm inside the apartment. She noted that the
apartment hadn’t changed much since she moved out. While she
contemplated what her dad had said about settling down with Jake,
she also wondered if her career had been the correct path to take.
At the time, she was convinced that her career came first, and
there would always be time for a relationship. Now, standing in
Jake’s apartment, she doubted it had been the best path to choose.
Then it hit her with full force. The morbid thoughts consumed her,
and she started to cry. She couldn’t stop. Her legs weakened and
collapsed beneath her. Lying on the floor, she was overwhelmed with
feelings of exposure, vulnerability, and guilt.

* * *

“Gates made up some crap about you and Abrams. He
made me angry, so I stepped into the hall for a break. He managed
to take the weapon from the officer guarding him. He killed the
officer. He went into the hall and tried to escape then he drew
down on me, I was in his sights. I wasn’t armed so there was
nothing I could do. There wasn’t any place in the corridor to hide.
An FBI agent, a friend of mine, shot Gates. She fired twice over my
shoulder as I dropped to the floor. I could hear the bullets hiss
as they passed by my ear. It was all of two seconds, and it was
over.”

“Oh my God, I didn’t know,” Lori says.

She reaches for me. She grasps my hands and draws
them to her lips giving them a gentle, loving kiss. Her dire
expression turns to one of relief. She holds me close.

Good, Gates is dead mommy. Now they won’t know about
you.

The aggressive, demanding voice follows Emily’s.

Kill Roberts before it’s too late.

A strange, twisted look appears on her face and it’s
obvious I’ve said too much.

“Lori, are you okay?”

She recovers and looks up at me with her beautiful
cyan eyes.

“I’m just so glad you weren’t hurt, I don’t know
what I would do if you were.”

Our embrace is strong and suggests together we can
do anything. She is an extraordinary woman and I’m a lucky man.

“I lost my friend today, but we got that sick
sonofabitch. I won’t bring the job home again, I’m sorry.”

We both realize what just slipped out of my mouth. A
grin appears on both of our faces.

“Jake, did you just say ‘bring the job
home
’?”

I’m actually glad it slipped out. It’s just as well
because I want her to know how I really feel. She pivots toward the
kitchen.

“Why don’t I get us both a drink?” she says.

“Is it all right if I put on some music?”

“Music’s good.”

Wandering over to the bookshelf, I can’t believe my
Freudian slip about being home. As my index finger runs across her
extensive music collection one CD stands out among the others. I
stop there, index finger pointing, and remove it from the
shelf.

What are the chances?

Inside the kitchen, Lori finds the appropriate
glasses inside a cabinet. She holds out a bottle of Canadian Club
for me to see.

“With Seven?”

“Perfect.”

Lori places the drinks on a serving tray. Tucked
away behind the knife holder and concealed in a vial inside a sugar
canister, are the tranquilizers she uses to disable her victims.
Emily’s voice beckons her.

Kill him mommy, so it’s just you and me again.

As Emily’s voice fades, the other insists.

What are you waiting for? All men are evil. Kill him
now.

Lori is terrified waiting for the voices to
stop.

No, I can’t, don’t you see?

As my hand touches her shoulder, she jumps. She
looks traumatized and stressed. I’ve never seen her like this.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing Jake.”

She scrutinizes the look on my face and knows I’m
going to need more information.

“Sometimes the flashbacks of the days with my
ex-husband come when I least expect them. One minute everything is
fine and a split second later, this. I’m sorry. Jake you shouldn’t
have to deal with this.”

She blinks rapidly and exhales.

“Lori, you know by now I care about you. I mean I
used the H-word tonight. I shouldn’t have been talking about my
work. I’m a homicide detective, and that’s an extremely upsetting
subject. I shouldn’t have done it. I’m sorry for upsetting you.
Please forgive me.”

As I wait for forgiveness, she surprises me with a
question as she points at the CD I still have in my hand.

“What are you doing with that?”

Holding it up, I rotate the CD and study it. After
what I had just said about not bringing the job home, I’m not sure
I want to tell her why.

“Again I apologize, while looking through your
collection I found it. Gates played the same one at every crime
scene. It’s played repeatedly on song number three. I’m not
familiar with the group.”

“Do you think it means anything?”

Kill him mommy, he knows.

“Must, but I don’t know why. I was surprised to see
it on your shelf, haven’t had a chance to listen to it. Do you mind
if I do?”

I’m distracted and fascinated by it as I walk over
to the stereo.

“Gates was one sick puppy.”

I set the CD on the tray and look for the play
button

“You should have heard the things he said. What kind
of sick mind has someone got to have to do such coldblooded
things?”

“Why do you consider him a sick puppy?”

That question hits me oddly, so I stop with the CD
and look at her.

“The mind is a crazy place, Jake. It’s hard to tell
why someone would do such things. It’s difficult to say because of
your friend, but sometimes, some people are led, destined, even
directed to do such things. They don’t have a choice.”

I’m astounded by her defense of Gates. Many people,
because of their circumstances and what life handed them, could
give up and become bad, but they don’t.

“Are you saying Gates may have had an
excuse
for what he did? He was driven to kill?”

“I’m just saying circumstances have the power to
change us, be it for good, or bad. Not everyone has the capacity to
handle what happens to us in this life, that’s all I’m saying,
Jake.”

My answer to her philosophy of understanding is
brief, pointed, aggressive and sarcastic.

“So let me get this straight. I need to understand
Michael Gates was abused, or spanked, or whatever, so it was okay
for him to kill my friend, Oh, I get it, my God what was I
thinking?”

The temperature in the living room plunges to
bitterly cold.

See mommy, I told you.

“Jake, I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say. Maybe
I’m just not ready, I don’t know. I think I’m going to need more
time.”

I’m crushed. I have been suffocating her with my
life and my job. It’s too much for me, so it must be too much for
her. I don’t know what to say, or if I should say anything at
all.

What’s wrong with you, man?

As I turn to leave, I stop, hoping she will invite
me back into her arms. Her eyes plead with me. I gently close the
door behind me. Standing outside, I’m numb. I make my way back to
my car.

Walk away man.

* * *

“Daddy, it’s you’re little girl. I need you, daddy,
I did a bad thing,” Mika said.

He listened while his little girl collapsed under a
mountain of anguish. He was a powerful man, yet he knew he was
powerless to rescue her. All he could provide was compassion,
understanding and the familiar voice that dispensed the logic of
life. His grip tightened on the telephone.

“Mika, where are you, baby? I can be––”

“No daddy.”

Mika forced out the words through her sobbing. She
knew she was stronger, but this time her raging emotions took
complete control. There wasn’t a chapter in the parent manual
Robert could refer to, so he could help his daughter. It wasn’t a
subject parents normally faced. During his early years in Special
Ops, he had killed, but never close up, never saw the victims.
“DBD, Death by Detonation” his comrades called it. All he could do
now was to listen to his little girl who was hurting. Robert Scott,
captain of industry, who was highly regarded as an effective
communicator, and hard nosed negotiator, struggled to hold back his
own tears. Mika finally settled down and told her story. The fact
he was listening meant everything. The words came out slowly.

“I just needed to talk to you.”

“Where are you, honey?” Robert said.

“I’m at Jake’s.”

“Good, is he there with you?”

“No, I don’t know where he is right now, but I’m
sure he’ll be home soon.”

Her intuition told her differently when she first
arrived. She took a shallow breath.

“We were at a standstill in the case––no leads, no
clues. I had gone back to Quantico to regroup. Harmon called and
told me Ed was murdered. I flew back immediately.”

She stopped to wipe away tears.

“When I got back to the precinct, I met Harmon and
we watched through the one-way mirror, while Jake interrogated the
suspect. Jake left the room for a minute. He had been listening to
the confession and it turned his stomach. After what Gates said,
after what he has done–– God could not have created such a
monster.”

Robert sat down in his chair. He was careful not to
miss even one word. Mika continued as more tears fell. She pushed
hard to get the words out.

“Jake walked out into the hallway and saw me. He
started walking toward me when there was a shot fired behind him.
Gates had taken an officer’s gun, shot and killed the officer then
aimed at Jake. He was going to shoot. Jake wasn’t armed. He dropped
to the floor just as I fired, I thought I hit Jake, but Gates went
down instead.”

She stopped speaking as every detail of the shooting
replayed in her mind from the sound of the discharging weapon, to
the spurting of blood, up until the last breath she saw him take.
Her confession was over and she waited for forgiveness.

“I can’t do this anymore.”

“Stay there until Jake gets home. He understands. I
will do whatever you want, get whatever you need, sweetheart.
You’re not alone, Mika. We’re all here for you.”

His voice cracked with concern and hurt.

“I love you Mika, so very much.”

“I love you too, daddy.”

Robert heard the line go dead. He stood for a long
time staring out at the city lights through his office windows. He
thought about life, the world, people, and about the human struggle
with good and evil. Those same thoughts passed through Mika, right
before she crashed into a coma-like sleep. It was the mind’s way to
sooth the pain.

* * *

A brilliant astrophysicist said that chronology,
particularly the past, is protected. He said that even if you had a
time machine, and traveled backward, the past would remain intact.
Yet, we always try to alter it. We try to paint it over in
different colors of perception-red, reason-blue, and excuse-yellow.
What we simply should do is learn to live with it. So far, the bad
in my life is running far ahead of the good. I thought my
relationship with Lori would change that. I was wrong. Falling in
love happens all of the time in the movies, why can’t it happen for
me? It occurs to me I’m driving in circles. Harmon is right I
didn’t belong behind the wheel of a three-thousand-pound lethal
weapon. I figure it’s time to hose down the fire inside.