After the Before (10 page)

Chapter Seventeen             

Jasmine

“We won first class seats.” I say to Alex.

“This is awesome.” he smiles. It has been a long time since I’ve seen his face like this… so content and carefree.

Shortly after the assembly is over and everyone begins to head to their designated bus
ses, Alex walks with me outside without saying a word. The silence is peaceful, instead of the awkwardness that clings to me around most people these days. Just having him next to me makes me feel safe. I’m in the middle of warning myself against thoughts of him when he breaks the silence.

“What bus are you on?”

“Two. What’s your number?”

“Three.” He stands in front of me for a moment,
looking like he doesn’t want to leave. “I guess I’ll see you at the airport.”

“Alright.” He turn
s to walk away, and then a slight panic rises inside of me. I don’t want him to leave me.

“Hey, Alex
?” My voice speaks before I can control it. Now I have to come up with something to say… “Thanks.”

‘
Thanks! Thanks for what? Say something you idiot!’

“Thanks for coming to find me for Mrs. Hubert. I really need
ed the extra credit for turning the assignment in early, and the first class prize was nice too, huh.”

He only stares at me.
He always seems to be in control of his emotions, making me wonder if the response I have to him is solely one sided. Could I be the only one feeling this way? When he steps closer to me, it makes me think he feels it too.

“
You’re welcome.” He whispers into my ear.

He leaves me breathless and almost quivering as he saunters away. I watch him until he walks up the stairs of
his bus. Then, he surprises me when he turns back to see if I’m still there. When he sees me, a smirk forms on his beautiful lips, and then he disappears onto the bus.

I’m so absorbed in watching him, I neglect to hear anyone approach me until a hand comes down on my shoulder, scaring the living shit out of me and sending a
sharp pain through part of my body. I close off the pain as I pull away and turn to see who’s touching me.

Andrew’s smile falters when he sees the look on my face. “Sorry. Did I startle you?”

I try to wipe the bitch face off and put on a happy face for him, wanting him to think that everything is fine.

“Yeah, sorry.” Andrew is easy to throw off any trail; I wish Alex were as gullible. “What bus are you on?”

Andrew takes a moment before he answers, “Bus two. You?”

“Two, too. That’s cool.” I smile at him, doing better at locking up the emotions I was feeling five minutes prior.

His face lights up with hope. “You ready to go then? I think we’re the last ones.”

Looking around the school grounds, I realize he’s right. We need to hurry.

“Yeah, let’s go.” My stomach flips. I’m so excited about the warm beaches we will be on in a few short hours.

The bus is packed
, and Andrew is able to get another girl to squeeze in with her friends to give us our own seat. We talk about Mrs. Hubert’s surprise twist on the biology project. Turns out, Andrew and his partner Kevin turned their project in early too, so they would be joining us in first class. I wonder how many people turned their projects in early.

Filing off the bus is insane
; there are kids everywhere. The teachers are having a hard time keeping us corralled and directed toward where we need to be. Once we’re ushered to the gate, the principal claps to gain everyone’s attention.

“Class,” He
yells over the loud crowd of seniors. “Everyone who turned in their project early needs to gather over there, by Mrs. Hubert. The rest of you need to follow me.” He turns and continues through the gate to our plane. Since we have our own plane on reserve, there is no waiting like we would have to do for normal flights.

A group of about twenty wait
with Mrs. Hubert. Once we all assemble toward her, she speaks, “Alright everyone. First off, congratulations for turning your projects in early… hard work does pay off.” She smiles at her own little joke, while the rest of us roll our eyes. “We are going to go straight through; no waiting for us.” She starts to turn, but then turns back. “Oh, yes. The only catch about first class is the seating. You must sit with your lab partner. I will assign rows once we are on board.” This receives moans from a handful of people, including Andrew, who I am sure, was planning to sit next to me.

I, on the other hand, am elated; my wonderful teacher is forcing me to sit next to Alex. I chance a glance his way and find him already staring at me, a hint of his cocky grin playing
at the corner of his mouth, and I can’t help but smile with him.

I follow the line of students that trail behind Mrs. Hubert. We make it to the plane about ten minutes before the rest of the senior class. Once
on board, Mrs. Hubert heads to the front of the first class section and clears her throat.

“Alright, now here is how things are going to go. You are a first class passenger
, so they will treat you as such. However, you will have to sit in the row I assign you, and next to your lab partner.” She looks around at each person. “That being said, let’s get started.” She begins reading names off a piece of paper.

Alex and I take our seats in the sixth row
, both of us reaching the aisle at the same time. I’m giddier than a kid in a candy shop and really want to sit next to the window. I’m practically bouncing up and down with a gigantic grin plastered on my face.

Alex laughs,
and a relaxed, very real smile spreads wide, showing all his beautiful straight, white teeth. “Go ahead.” He gestures.

As excited as I am, I lean in and hug him without being conscious of making the decision. When I lean back, embarrassment clear on my features, Alex looks pleased. I quickly move to my seat before I can do anything else crazy, like kiss him.
Whoa, wait.
I have got to get myself in check. Margret is not a joke. She will look forward to hurting me again, and she will be looking for any reason to do so, and that is something I will have to deal with… but this time, she threatened my dad, and I cannot chance it.             

After thinking about the situation, I realize that after this flight, continuing talking to Alex will only put my
dad in danger. I cannot risk Margret hearing about it. My dad is way more important than anything I would selfishly want.

“Are you alright?” Alex is watching me with his
all-knowing eyes.

“Yeah.” My voice comes out weak. I clear my throat before speaking again. “Yeah,
I’m fine… Just thinking.” I say vaguely.

He studies me
for a moment and nods.

I turn and watch out the window as our plane takes off and heads for Hawaii. I decide to worry about things when we land
, and at least enjoy the flight there.

Our flight left at one,
and our estimated time of arrival is in five hours, putting us there at around six or seven. We are staying in Honolulu, at The Luxure Hawaiian, on the beach. It’s one of the nicest hotels in Honolulu. Our class was able to get a great rate since we rented out two entire floors worth of rooms, and not to mention, the majority of the student’s parents were pretty wealthy. I am ecstatic to get there. The only thing I’m uncomfortable about is the roommate situation. We would all be rooming with one other person, and since I have no friends, it is going to be interesting to meet mine.

Lunchtime rolls around for everyone on the plane. The first class passengers have a choice
between chicken salad, pizza, or cheeseburgers, while the other passengers only have turkey sandwiches.

I cho
ose the chicken salad, which is amazing.

“How’s the pizza?” I ask Alex.

“Good. You want a bite?”

“No.” I wave him off.

“Come on, Jas. We used to share pizza all the time.” His smile is genuine, remembering sleepover’s we used to have together with our siblings.

I smile, recalling all the stupid things we used to do together.
I decide to just give in, so I lean over and take a big bite of his pizza. My eyes roll back in my head and I moan with pleasure. “Dis is fooo good.” I say, sauce and cheese overflowing my mouth.

Alex laughs. “I told you.”

I chew and try to reel in my friendship mode with Alex. I can feel myself getting too comfortable with him, so I need to do something to stop this friendship from spiraling out of my control; the game of distance must rear its ugly head again. Even a small slip, like from Andrew’s big mouth, got to my mom’s ears, it could very well come from anyone.

The flight attendants voice snaps me back
to the here and now. “We will be landing in about thirty minutes. Please make sure you are ready to take your seats and lock your seatbelts in place.”

I’ve
already decided to start, and I’ve done a decent job at staying in my own thoughts and blocking Alex’s glances out. He’s turned to me a few times during the flight, lips posed as if to speak, then choosing not to, and going back to his own thoughts.

I continued to look out the window, as if I was oblivious to his attempts.

Stage one of distancing from Alex... Check.

Now all I have to do is try to avoid him the entire time we’re here. I can hang out with Andrew non-stop; we did already have a date planned for tomorrow night. If that went well, then we could easily hang out the rest of the week.

Yeah, that could work.

In reality, hanging out with Andrew non-stop is not my idea of a great vacation. In fact, I’m not even sure if I still want to go on
a date with him, but at least it will give me a decent distraction from thinking about Alex.

Hopefully.

Chapter Eighteen

Alex

Jasmine remained quiet the entire trip. I’ve thought about talking to her a few times, but then decide
d that if she wanted to talk, she’d talk. The silence only contributes to my thoughts of her. I want to know who hurt her, and why? I want to know what the deal is with Andrew, and if I asked her out to dinner, what would she say?

That last thought throws me off. Dinner?
I don’t take chicks, especially white chicks for that matter, out to dinner. I don’t think that way with Jasmine though. I would be worried about what people would think of us, her clean, creamy white skin, and me, with all my gang tattoos. They would probably think that I was forcing her to be with me.

The thought pisses me off. Why wouldn’t I be good enough for her? I used to be. I’m the same person I’ve always been on the inside. The thought drives me so insane
, that I turn to her and blurt out, “You want to have dinner with me?”

I can tell I’ve caught her off guard when she stops breathing. Her body is tense when she looks at me. “I can’t.” She says, but the tone of her voice says differently.

“Why not?” I can’t help but dig myself in deeper.

She looks down in her lap for the answer. She refuses to meet my eyes when she finds her words. “Because, I’m going to hang out with Andrew tonight and tomorrow night.” Without her looking at me, it’s hard to decipher if her words are truthful.

“You’d rather hang out with that pendejo than me?” I’m offended.

Her face is straight when she finally looks up and says, “Yes, I would.”

She turns back around and continues looking out the window.
What the fuck?
She wants to hang out with him more than me? No one wants to hang out with anyone more than me, no female I know, anyway. We were getting along, and I thought we were feeling a little bit of the same thing, but it’s apparent that I was completely wrong.

I mumble a string of Spanish and English curse words under my breath, sit back, and wait to get off this fucking plane. She
has pissed me off royally, wounding my pride. She wants to hang out with that douchebag, fine. She’ll not have to worry about me bothering her. I’ll do my own thing. We’ll see who comes running to who first, because it sure as hell won’t be me.

Our conversation ceases until we’re off the plane. “Have a good night.” I tell her and walk away before she can say anything that will make me forgive her.

She remains silent… saying nothing. She looks at me for a brief moment, then turns to get her luggage. She plays a good game, pushing people away when she realizes their getting too close. I recognize it, because my game is identical. She’s beginning to see the smiles she gives me, the real laughs, the friendship, and it scares the shit out of her. I know, because I feel the exact same way.

When I’m away from her, I want to be
near her, but when I’m close to her, she makes me feel again, which freaks me out. I want to push her away; convince myself that I’m fine without her, even though she’s the only thing I can think about every second of every day… it’s messed up. I make a mental note to get the boys together tonight and cause some trouble.

We check into the hotel, which is the nicest place I have ever stayed, hands down. The entire building is white. Inside, every surface is made of marble
, and is all white. The carpet has some retro, red, black, and white swirling pattern, which is almost enough to make you dizzy, or feel like you’re having a seizure.

I wonder which one of my members I will be rooming with
; I couldn’t imagine they would put me with anyone else. A room card for 319 is in my hand and I head in that direction, following the golden plaques on the walls. Room 310, 317, here it is, 319. I slide my card in the slot, hearing the electronic release when it pops the lock open for me. I turn the handle and walk in.

I hear someone in the bathroom as I pass by. Whoever my new roommate is, is obviously not from my side of town, let alone in my gang. His preppy luggage
is already spread across the bed next to the window. I already gave up my window view once today, I am not doing it again.

The room is average size. The TV is mounted to the wall
, the DVD player and PS3 are on a small stand below. This looks like it could be a blast, even though I couldn’t imagine being in my room much. The carpet is a solid red, accentuating the black curtains and bedspreads. A mini fridge sits snuggled in the far corner, next to the big windows.

I toss all of preppy boy
’s mierda onto the other bed and start to unpack my own stuff, placing things in the drawers next to my bed. I hear the door to the bathroom click open.

I turn to see who I’m going to push around for the next week
, and when I see Andrew’s face, I smile. He’s the first person I want to mess with this week. By the look on his face, he wouldn’t mind me starting something with him, either. In fact, he looks like he may start it first.

“Why’d you move my shit?” He walks over to his stuff, doing a visual to make sure none of his high priced crap is missing. As if I’d want any of his garbage.

“I like the view.” I point to the ocean and beach.

Andrew stares me down, not blinking once. Instead of fighting, he turns and begins to change his clothes. I’m shocked. I thought it was going to go down and I’m a little disappointed that he decided against it.

After the rest of my stuff is unpacked, I glance over at Andrew. He catches me watching him and he can’t help but comment.

“See something you like?” He smirks at me.

“You wish.” I shove my bag in the bottom drawer.

“I’m going out to dinner with Jasmine.” He’s fixing his shirt in the mirror, watching
for my reaction.

Keeping my face blank and unreadable, I play off his words. “Where
are you two heading?” I’m curious, because seeing them together would unhinge me, sending me into a downward spiral that would inevitably end with me standing over Andrew’s bloody, unrecognizable face if I see him lay one little finger on her.

‘
I think I may be losing it.’

“Some
restaurant downtown. I guess they have authentic Hawaiian food.”

“We’re
in
Hawaii, it’s all authentic, baboso.” He looks at me puzzled, not realizing I called him a dumbass. 

“Whatever. I have to meet Jasmine
… and stay out of my shit, Navarro.” He points his finger at me.

I pretend to shake in my boots to piss him off. “I don’t want any of your shit, white boy.” I flop on my bed and flick
on the TV.

He stares at me for a moment before walking out the door. I can’t believe Jasmine wants to hang out with that idiot. It surprises me he’s made it to his senior year. His parents probably paid for his grades.

I’m about twenty minutes into wondering what Jasmine and Wonder Boy are doing when someone bangs on my door, like they’re the damn police. I jump up and pull the door open to find a few members of my gang.

“Que pasa, jefe?” Carlos asks.

“Nada, y tu?” I let them in.

“We’re going down to the beach to check out the babes. You want to come?” Carlos leans against the wall next to the bathroom.

“Do you even need to ask if I want to check out some fine mamacitas?” I click the TV off and change my shirt in a flash. I’ll do anything, as long as it gets my mind off Jasmine and her wonderful date. Occupying myself by hooking up with some hot tail here is just the kind of medicine I need. The last time I had sex was about a month ago… I could use the distraction.