Accidentally in Love With a God (2012) (10 page)

I followed the boy for what seemed like an eternity but my muscles burned, and, finally, I had to slow to a fast walk. “I…can’t…Guy,” I panted, trying to catch my breath. “The air…is way… too thick for any aerobic activities.”

“
I told you, you need to work out more.”

“God. You…are…un…belie…vable,” I choked out.

“
You have no idea,”
he replied.

Helplessly doubled over, hands on my knees, I watched as Chac dissolved into the shadows of the thick vegetation. I realized I was no longer on any trail. I pivoted several times. Which direction now? Every damned tree and plant looked the same. Green, green, and more leafy green. It was like being trapped in a huge spinach salad.

“Some guide. Now I’m lost.” I grabbed my aching sides.

“
No, you’re not lost. You are near, Emma, I can hear you.”

My heart fell through my stomach, into my knees, and to the bottom of my feet.

Holy Virgin of Guadalupe. This was it. All of the planning and years of dreaming. And believe me, I’d had every kind of dream imaginable. Guy turning out to be a gargoyle, swallowing me whole. Then there was the one where he was a Poltergeist and pulled me into a giant cave where I was trapped for all eternity with evil spiders, although sometimes the spiders were clowns. I hated clowns. Too happy. That’s not normal.

Then there was the dream where his body matched the voice, and I melted into a puddle on the ground, then evaporated.

I cautiously pushed through the next wall of vines and brush. The jungle opened up, and I saw it: the cenote.

***

The remaining light from the sky filtered through the trees, creating dancing speckles of light over the surface of the deep dark green pool that sluggishly churned with rotting leaves and other floating debris.

I shuddered at the sight of it.

It was enormous—about fifty yards across with a steep one-story drop to the calm surface. I’d seen photos of cenotes; they were usually covered with tiny plants and vines along the sides. This one was different. It repelled the vegetation, and the limestone walls were perfectly smooth and coated with a thick green slime.

“Hello?” I called out. “Guy? Where are you? I don’t see the ruin.”
Please don’t let this be a trap. Please.

“
Emma, sweetheart, this is the hard part, but I need you to trust me.”

“Trust you?”

“
Jump in the water.”

“Whyyy?” I was frozen on the outside, but inside, there was a personal apocalypse going down.

“
I’m inside, Emma. You need to be in the water when you say the words.”

My whole world inverted once more. Could this get any worse? All this time he’d been lying? “Wait. So, there’s no ruin? And now I’m supposed to still trust you and jump into the water?”

“
Yes.”

“No way! I’m not getting in there,” I said. Then the reality, the horror of the situation hit me full force. In short, what the hell was I doing rummaging through the jungle in a foreign country, about to free a man whose origins were completely unknown to me? A man who’d tormented me in every way possible; a man I couldn’t stop feeling I belonged to, yet needed to escape?

Yup. It’s official. Emma Keanne, is insane.

“
I’m sorry I lied, but you would’ve never come if I said the truth.”

“Damn straight. Wait. Where…are…you?” I peered over the edge—morbid curiosity—but didn’t see anyone inside. I gasped, covering my mouth. “No. No. No.” This couldn’t be right. This couldn’t be possible! It was the one scenario I’d never thought of. All along I believed he was real, that he was not a figment of my imagination. But I was wrong—Flat Earth Club wrong. There was no one there!

I dropped to my knees and began to bawl uncontrollably. This was bad.

“
Why are you crying? You can do this, Emma.”

“Because there’s no one there. I’m a lunatic!”

“
No, you’re not! Listen to me—”

“Prove it!” I screamed between hysterical sobs. “Prove this isn’t some psychotic episode.”

“
No, Emma! No. Let me out so I can explain! You’re not crazy, I promise.”

I ground my fists into the sides of my head. “What? Weren’t you going to explain everything now? Because now would be a super-duper fucking good time, my friend.”

“
You’re being irrational. Let me out. We’ll talk this through.”

The light bulb, albeit a glaringly red and bursting with giant flames, flickered on. “Oh, I get it!” I screamed at the water. “You never intended to tell me anything! Shit! Why am I talking to a pond? Oh, God!”

I don’t know if it was the lack of sleep, the fear, months of stress, or the fact I was talking to an empty sludge pond, but I was certain my head was about to grow rocket boosters and blast off my body.

I. Was. Snapping.

“No. You know what? I don’t even care anymore. It doesn’t fucking matter. Maybe I should just jump in and die! It would be better than living the rest of my life in a nut farm or with you!”

“
Emma, calm down. Someone’s going to hear you.”

“Who? Who the hell is going to hear some crazy woman screaming in the middle of the God damned jungle?”

Hiccup! Hiccup!
“Oh, great. Just what I needed to complete the moment.”

“
Emma, I—”

“No, screw you. I’m through with your mind games. Or…my mind games? I don’t even know anymore!”
Hiccup!

“
Emma, I can prove I’m real, that you’re not crazy. Jump in, and you’ll see me.”

What if I was right? Or, what if this was how my grandmother died? Lured by some insane voice to the isolated Mexican jungle where she was told to jump into a Mayan pool like this one. I envisioned her in my mind, babbling to herself and swatting away the mosquitoes while having this exact same conversation as she stood over the edge of this very same pool.

“No,” I said aloud, contradicting my hysterical-self. “She wasn’t crazy.” She was the sanest person I knew. And if she were here now, she’d say, ‘Holy Virgin, child. Are you out of your crazy-loca head? Go home, this instant!'”

And, dammit, she’d be right!

“Okay. I’ll jump, but on one condition. If you’re real, I want you to disappear. I never want to hear your voice again. I don’t even want to see you, or know what you are. You disappearing from this moment forward will be my proof of my sanity. Got it!?”

“
You can’t mean that. I have answers for you, Emma. I can help you find out what happened to your grandmother. I can make up for all of the pain I have caused you.”

Impossible. A lifetime of therapy wouldn’t heal the damage he’d done. The best I could hope for was to be able to fake normal.

“Yes. I can mean it.”
If you’re real, then I can’t be whole with you in my life. I’ll always be conflicted—wanting to be with you, wanting to be free of you,
I wanted to say, but couldn’t risk exposing myself for all the obvious reasons.

“For years, I’ve been your prisoner, and I don’t know what I did to deserve it, but it ends today. I don’t ever want to hear your voice again. I want you gone. Promise now, or I won’t take one more step.”

“
Emma. I know I’ve pushed you, but we’ve come this far, and so much is riding on you.”

“No. Promise now, or I turn around.”

“
I must see you…safely back.”
There was a long silent pause.
“I will not promise.”

“I’m out of here! And don’t try talking to me anymore because the first thing I’m doing is checking into the psych ward where they’re going to medicate me so heavily that I won’t even hear myself. I bet Mexico has great drugs!”

“
Emma, you have to—”

“No. You shut the hell up! You’re not even real. You never were!”

“
Emma, I’m sorry, but you’ve given me no other choice.”

I felt something soft and furry rub against my leg. “Holy—” I stumbled back, falling to the ground.

Inches from my face, a giant black cat hissed, its bright green eyes boring a hole through my soul. I quickly eyed the water. It was looking much more inviting now; cats didn’t like water, right? I slowly rose to my knees, holding out my hands. “Good kitty. Stay kitty.” I inched toward the edge of the cenote. It was a long way down, but maybe I could—

The cat took a small step forward and displayed its incisors.

“Never mind!” I jumped and hit the water sideways with a loud
slap!
, plunging several feet under. My head broke through the surface where I saw the jaguar leaning over the edge, preparing to pounce in after me. No doubt it wanted to play “bobbing for humans.”

My heart pounded furiously, and for a moment, I forgot all about my little insanity dilemma.

I looked for something to throw—a fallen branch or magic floating rock—but there were just my sneakers.

Treading water, I awkwardly used one foot to pry off a shoe and chucked it at the furry beast. It hissed as my shoe hit the concave wall of the cenote several feet below. “Dammit!” I slipped off the other and overthrew. “Christ. This can’t be happening!” I cried. The cat was leaning over the edge; if it didn’t jump, it might fall in, anyway.

I did several three-sixties in the water, hoping to find something—anything—to throw. But there was nothing except…

Near the wall directly behind me, a miniature drum-shaped object bobbed in the water. I swam toward it and tried to hug it into my chest. The jar, ten inches wide and made of a dark gray ceramic material, rolled. I maneuvered the jar closer and got a firm grasp. In one adrenaline charged motion, I kicked with all my strength and hurled it over my head at the cat.

I nailed it right on the head. “Yes!” The hairy monster scampered away, deciding I wasn’t a worthy snack.

I felt utterly ecstatic for two glorious seconds until I realized I was still in hot water...or, funky cenote water. Whichever.

I pivoted in the pool, sadly noticing there was no way to climb out. With its ten-foot-high inward sloping walls, slick with algae, I was stuck. “Lord love a duck,” I muttered. “Can this get any worse?”

Silence.

“Guy? Hello?” But there was no Guy, no humming, no toucans. It was beyond eerie. “Guy? Are you there? What do I do now? I’m stuck here.”

Again, nothing but sweet silence. A lovely way to end my life. Except, I wasn’t ready to die yet.

Something tickled the back of my brain, something I was supposed to do. Something Guy had told me.

Yes! The phrase!

That fleeting thought lasted two more seconds until I realized that ready or not, I
was
going to die. The water began swirling violently like someone had triggered the auto-flush—pulling me down. I flopped my arms wildly in the water, but it took less than a minute before it won.

Chapter TWELVE

When Emma hit the water, Guy poised himself like a racehorse waiting to explode from the gate; the anticipation was almost unbearable. So many years he’d suffered inside this frigid, watery prison, cut off from his world, tormented by the physical comforts—air and warmth—just outside his reach.

Worst of all, that torment had deeply scarred him, weakened him. He’d once been free of the smorgasbord of dysfunctional neediness that plagued humans. Now, he was filled with it. The need to kill his enemy, to punish them for hurting Gabriela. The need to see Emma with his own eyes and touch her. Perhaps, even beg her forgiveness for the pain he’d caused her.

The need to feel the fibers of his world tugging through his soul. Hell, he was even tormented by the need for food. He salivated, thinking about the delectable human treats he’d once prepared in the kitchen of his human home in Italy.

Weak. Weak. Weak
, he thought, hoping that time would heal him and return him to his former, heartless deity-self.

But he doubted it. Seriously doubted it. Sharing his life with a human female for twenty-two years had drastically, permanently changed him. Fate always took such pleasure in teaching humility, even to the gods.

Right now, for example.
A minute had ticked by without incident.
Emma must have recited the phrase already. Something must be wrong.
The portal remained closed.

But why? Emma had enough of their blood in her veins to open it. Well, so he thought. Could he have been wrong? But he was never wrong. He’d had seven sufferable decades to think through every possible explanation of how the cenote’s curse functioned, and only one made sense: the Maaskab had used dark energy to shift the chemistry of the water, thereby altering the charge of energy needed to complete the final step of his transformation into a tangible state.