Abandoned (25 page)

Fighting through the tears he went on to state how deeply ashamed he was of himself, and hadn’t realised in doing what he had done he was no better than the men who had abused him until after killing Jim. Killing the three girls was the only thing he regretted in all of this. He then co-operated fully in helping Taylor and his staff locate the missing bodies of Lucy Mitchell and Sarah Davidson so that the parents could finally lay their daughters to rest.

He thought of his own daughters; they would now never want anything to do with him ever again. He then thought of his wife, the woman he had loved and lied to for all these years about his real background and upbringing. Maybe if he had just been honest with her from the start he might have been able to lay all his demons to rest without the need for any of this to have happened. But he knew it was too late, and that the damage was irreversible, and knew once again he would be abandoned and left alone by the ones he loved.

***

With Messenger dead, and Taylor reinstated by the new interim Chief Inspector, he thought it about time that Georgie brought in their witness after she had been released from the hospital. The witness managed to provide enough evidence of Messenger’s involvement in the paedophile network to tarnish his reputation for good, even after his death, and she also managed to identify and make statements about lots of other high-ranking officials. One by one, the police arrested and charged numerous men involved in the systematic abuse of young children spanning over a total of thirty years.

After extensive psycho evaluation Charles was diagnosed as having a psychotic personality disorder, along with schizophrenia — probably brought on by the traumas of losing his parents Vicky and William McMullen at such a young age, being abused at the farm, and the death of his friend and commanding officer, Marcus Lancaster, not to mention his Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It was ruled that Charles was not of sound mental health when he had committed his crimes; he was sectioned under the Mental Health Act and detained indefinitely at Berkshire Broadmoor Hospital for the Criminally Insane, where he would stay for the remainder of his life, with no chance of ever being released.

***

Now the case had finally been brought to an end, Georgie decided that the time was now right for her to return home and leave Taylor. He’d been promoted to the position of Chief Inspector after Messenger’s demise, and was doing a fantastic job in his new role. They warmly embraced as though they had been friends for years as they said their goodbyes; a lot had happened over such a relatively short period of time. Taylor once again thanked her for all her help and repeated how he could have never done it without her support.

‘You were pretty awesome yourself, mister!’ she told him. ‘I suppose I’ll miss you. I’ll definitely keep in touch from time to time to see how you’re getting on, Chief Inspector!’

They very nearly came close to a kiss as they embraced but both stopped themselves, knowing what happened the last time.

Georgie whispered in his ear, ‘We’ll always have the memory of our night together.’

They finally ended their embrace. Taylor could only smile as he watched her walk away, get into her car, and drive out of his life.

***

A month had passed since Charles had been admitted to Broadmoor and the media circus was starting to die down; journalists were beginning to run out of stories to tell regarding Charles’ background, the abuse and, of course, his victims. It was at this point that Rebecca finally felt the time was right to visit Charles.

She could barely look him in the eye as she sat and explained that, since what he had done had come to light, she and the girls had received nothing but abuse from everybody they had encountered. He had made their lives unbearable, with even so-called close friends turning their backs on them. She went on to say how the girls had disowned him for what he had done and put them through, and never wished to see him again for the rest of their lives; they couldn’t bear the thought that their father, the man they loved and idolised, was actually a monster. She then told him that this would be the last time he would ever see her or the girls as she couldn’t take any more. She was going to stay with distant relatives in Canada and start a new life for her and the girls, and possibly assume new identities to escape being linked to him.

Charles could not find any words to say to his wife and just sat there in tears, ashamed of what he had done, of what he had put them through. He knew that she meant every word of what she had just told him; he would never see her again. She just had one last question to ask him before she got up and turned to leave.

‘Was everything a lie, Charles — or should I say, Jonathon? Did you ever love me and the girls, or was it just all a cover up?’

Tears ran down his face as he replied. ‘I have loved you from the very first day I saw you back in that corridor at Lancaster. And I shall love you, Molly and Fiona until the day I die, Rebecca. I know you will never understand what I have done, and I don’t expect you or the girls to, but please know, and let them know, that I will always love you three, and I will miss you every day until the Good Lord hands me my judgement.’

Rebecca held back her tears just long enough to get out of sight of Charles, then broke down as she realised he had meant every word he had just spoke. Part of her still loved Charles, despite what he had done, but part of her knew that she had never really known him — she never knew about all the hurt and suffering he had been through. She pitied him and, even though she could never get their old life back, she promised herself that she would remember him in her prayers every night. She found herself hoping that one day he would finally find peace and comfort from his demons, and find it in his heart to forgive all the people who had ever wronged him. With that, she left the hospital grounds and never looked back.

Charles was heartbroken and devastated as he was escorted back to his cell, and once again broke down in despair and prayed to the Lord for help and guidance. But, whereas before he’d believed God had somehow guided him in what he was doing, now he felt nothing. He was abandoned by not only his family, but by the one person he thought he could rely on in times of crisis and despair, ever since he first picked up the Bible as a child. He didn’t know which way to turn, and could not see a way out of his torture.

Once he had managed to gain some form of composure he finally decided he knew what he had to do…he would be committing a mortal sin by doing so, but his God had already decided to cast him aside! He decided he was going to take his own life.

He tore his sheet from his bed into thin strips of material, stood on his stool and tied one of the ends to the light fitting that was positioned above him in the centre of the room. Once he had secured it into position he thought about writing a long letter to his wife and children to try and justify his previous actions, but decided against it; he knew it wouldn’t matter what he was to say, as he had caused them too much suffering to forgive. Instead he took a thick grey crayon he had been deemed safe to use, and started to write on the bright white cell wall.

CAN A WOMAN FORGET HER SUCKING CHILD, THAT SHE SHOULD NOT HAVE COMPASSION ON THE SON OF HER WOMB? YEA, THEY MAY FORGET, YET I WILL NOT FORGET THEE
.

Charles took one last look at the words he had written, then stood on his stool, slipped the noose he had prepared on the other end of the sheet around his neck, then uttered the words, ‘God, please forgive me.’

He kicked the stool from under him and felt the strain of the noose as it tightened around his neck. Charles didn’t even bother to fight it; his mind was firmly made up. A solitary tear ran down his cheek as he thought of happier times with Rebecca and the children. He hoped they would one day meet again in the afterlife. The last flicker of life exited his body and his existence was extinguished.

***

In one very last cruel twist of fate, a letter arrived the following day, addressed to Charles.

Charles, by this time, had been discovered dead in his cell. The governor decided to open the letter and see if there was a return address. He found the sender’s details at the top right of the page; a Mrs Shelley Winter from Silloth in Cumbria. The governor couldn’t help but read the contents through morbid curiosity.

Dear Charles,

You will not know who I am, but I know you. I’ve been meaning to contact you for so many years I’ve lost count; I just never found the right words to say. The simple truth is: I am your birth mother
.

I’m so, so sorry to hear of the horrific upbringing you received as a child. I read all about it in the papers after your arrest. I could’ve prevented all of this from
happening. I regret giving you up every day of my
life —
I was forced to by my parents, but I should’ve somehow forced them to see sense. I’ve searched for you for years with no luck — who knew that, all that time, we had been living on each other’s doorstep? I even kept my maiden name to make it easier for you to find me, even though I’ve been married for many years now
.

Yes, I married your father! We grew up and decided that the time was right for us to be reunited. You even have a little brother and sister now! I hope you can one day meet them, no matter the circumstances. I never spoke to my parents after leaving home and starting my own life. I cannot forgive them for making me abandon you
.

However, I do beg your forgiveness for what I let them do to me, to us. Please write back. Please forgive me
.

With all my love, always,

Your mother

xxx

In this potentially controversial new psychological thriller
Abandoned
we are introduced to first time novelist Lee shepherd.

After spending years writing in his spare time, producing anything from poetry to children’s stories for his own two children, he decided that the time was finally right to attempt to fulfil his life-long ambition of creating a full length novel.

Lee lives in Carlisle in the heart of Cumbria, having moved north from Lancashire in his mid-teens; he has a first-hand knowledge of all the areas mentioned in
Abandoned
, and now calls this idyllic setting home.

Although Lee one day dreams of becoming a full time author and screen play writer, he currently spends the majority of his working week caring for and mentoring teenagers in care as a Child Support Worker throughout Scotland.

His hobbies include snooker, boxing, fishing and working out in his local gym whenever the rare opportunity of down time presents itself, in between being a father and a husband to his wife, Kelly.

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