A Wedding Affair (The Wedding Affair) (8 page)

“Whoa wait a second Ian this is not a good idea!”
I wouldn’t go any further and I stopped kissing him.

“
Aria sweetheart be mine” he rubbed his nose to mine. I got mad and pulled away and sat back on the sofa as he hovered over me just looking at me, wanting this to go further.

“Ian you don’t understand
…” is all he let me get out before he started acting like a petulant teenager.

“Are you saving it for Bach?” Oh my gawd he doesn’t know me at all, he thinks I am fucking Tristan!

“So now you think I’m his whore?” I look at
him as my hair is a mess; my two top buttons on my blouse are undone as my décolletage reveals my black lacey bra.

“Aria I want you right here right now!”
He pushes back his hair as he hovers over me on the sofa.

And ladies and gentlemen I did something that I am so ashamed
of; I told him something so horrid, I bruised his manhood I shot him down I hit him where it counts.

“
Ian you don’t do it for me! You don’t get me wet for you! I am not aroused! Or attracted to you at all!” My voice is cocky and harsh and he should have slapped the shit out of me right then and there.

“You don’t fucken believe me? Ian is speechless
, so being the bitch that Tristan made me, I laid back on the sofa and pulled off my panties and tossed them aside, hiked up my skirt so it was around my waist and slowly opened my legs and revealed my most precious gift to him, my insidious behavior stopped him dead in his tracks, he said nothing and with no regard for Ian or his feelings I was cruel.

“Go ahead
touch me you don’t believe me check for yourself!” I grabbed his hand and put it on my most precious gift, his hand was shaking, he did not violate me, he removed his hand and the look on his face was disgust, and he was hateful, Ian’s last words to me were painful enough that I never want to hurt him again.

“
What has that animal done to you?”
He got up and left, and we never saw one another again until a month ago. I am not proud of the way I behaved and he has forgiven me and we have moved pass all of that.

Gosh I don’t want to remembe
r that anymore, jeez how foolish I was.

It is nice to know that
Christopher kept in touch with Ian all these years, he and Erika said he was in Europe teaching, traveling and he never mentioned me to them; well they never said anything to me.

I was a bitch on w
heels who was hurt by a man that I wanted with all my heart, Tristan shit on me and abused me, so what did I do? Shit on Ian, I’m not proud of myself it was a low in my life and I have not thought of it till today. Now you know why I left my old career and started Business as Usual.

As I recall all of
this the sad part is I believe I went back to Tristan yet again after the Ian incident. I think for the last time, then the inevitable happened and he and I were finally finished.

I suppose Ian
had every right to hate me for what I did, the way I was, he and I were good friends and I tossed him out like yesterday’s newspaper, I just completely discarded him and his feelings, So now that Ian is back we put all that behind us, he has not mentioned Tristan to me since we have been together, as a matter a fact the night Ian came to dinner at my house I told him I was still a virgin he was floored, he kissed me and hugged me like he was so relieved.

Now things are great
, we never got to this point until a month ago. When we saw one another at The West Side Market he was home because it’s their 100
th
anniversary, I guess he was visiting his family they still live here of course.

We just started talking and it’s been good,
I know I have not dated for a long time or even wanted to be with anyone but when Ian came back I was in a good place in my life to try and have a healthy relationship with Ian, I mean I can do this with him, I can be with him, we can grow together as a couple I think we have a  wonderful history together and that is something to build on, and besides I trust him, he is honest and above board and one day we will have a family together.

I know Ian and I
have always been friends since we were kids, we have based our relationship on friendship and mutual respect. I did question there are no throes of passion between us, he was no thief of my virtue as I offered myself to him body and soul, it was not what I imagined it to be and he says we need to work up to all of that, and who am I to question him I just had sex for the first time two weeks ago and it was ok I guess, I have nothing to compare it to so for me I guess it was ok, but after being kissed by Tristan tonight I feel more from his kiss than I felt after having sex with Ian I guess that is why I am drowning my sorrows.

I look back at
Ian and my relationship he wanted to make it more years ago but I wasn't ready to let go of Tristan, I wanted Tristan, I wanted to be Mrs. Tristan Bach, I wanted nothing else but Tristan, and Ian tried to make me see how foolish I was behaving over this kid who is eight years younger than me!

I rememb
er the dark times when Ian was forceful trying to bed me seducing me every chance he got and I shot him down over and over because I was fighting off Tristan and his over bearing advances that had me on my back, had my back against the wall and had his hands always inching up my skirt and reaching for my panties. I just couldn’t falter to him, it meant to much to me to give it to a man who didn’t hold me in highest regards, I couldn’t live with giving him my precious gift and him treating it like nothing. His less than honorable approach was not going to give him my pleasure so Tristan and I never even has sex, I just fell in love with Tristan instantly it was so fast and so hard and trust me Tristan tried to get me any way he could, the looks the glared the emails, the drinking the sexual innuendo it had become his hobby keeping me wet and wanton but I couldn’t succumb to his demands sleeping with Tristan there would be a price to pay for my actions and I couldn’t afford the purse, I couldn’t afford to lose a part of me and I have to say it was Ian’s words that stopped me from going down that dark road with Tristan it was also Erika and Christopher who pulled me from the clutches of Tristan and now that they are not here I am to face this all alone and I don’t know if I have the strength to fight him off myself. I’ve never slayed a dragon before and Tristan has always been dragon me in way too deep.

As I recall
all of my friends have all tired at one point to get me to see the error of my ways, they all tried to get me to forget about the loathsome Bach but he was never far from my thoughts. Ian and I did spend a lot of time together and I was never aroused or excited or wet for him, it is still like that today sad to say. That is my secret.

What I have r
ealized is Tristan is not for me, he never was for me, it took me a very long time to see that I was never a priority in his life, the way I am in Ian’s. I really don’t even know what Tristan saw in me? I never got the attraction I was not his type at all, he was always hooked on the tall, leggy blonds, I am short, dark hair, dark eyes and not his type at all. I’m happy and secure just knowing that Ian likes me as I am.

I gotta tell ya it
’s scary to leave a bride alone with her memories, two men. Two different life styles, it’s heart wrenching, But my solace is Ian, he has wanted me for as long as I can remember, and that is love, unconditional, uncomplicated, and all deserving, come on Aria get yourself together. Just because you saw Tristan it doesn’t mean anything it doesn’t change anything. After a drink with myself I calm and look around my beautiful store and I decide to go through the display cases and keep busy putting the displays together, they say idle hands are the devils workshop, so I push to my feet and get busy on occupying myself as I feel blessed with work.

-------<>-------

I grab the
mannequins, I pick a few of my top end dinner suit or tuxedos from our Tristan Collection,
quiet not a word out of any of you
, I grab some trouser suits with coordinating shirts, I pull something that I really love which are dinner jackets, they are elegant make a statement you can make them quite formal and quite leisure for a destination wedding or wardrobe show stopper. I get busy in creating a scene I have a table that is set with a wedding cake on it and china and the bride in the gown, It’s quite easy to lose yourself in all of this and that is what I am counting on.

What I always try to do is of course the obvious wedding attire bu
t also the graduation to bat mitzvah, new job, new position, I like when I can get my customers to think outside of the box a few more throws of confetti and I call this window done.

I finished cleaning up the
store, I even cleaned the light fixtures and dusted the shelves, I just want to be busy, wow its only after nine pm, I was getting a bit tipsy too, I had three vodka’s and I decided to put my dress away if I try and work on it the way I am I’ll wind up ruining it.

I can’t even see to thread a needle.
I put the dress back into my office and I locked up for the night, the window display came out great I give it one last look and I am taking my tired ass home.

Hopefully I will get my mind back on my wedding and off of Tristan Back, to think
kissing a fool
and I am engaged to someone else, never thought that was going to happen today.

Chapter 5

I REMEMBER YOU

I head towards the Ritz Carlton hotel, the casino crowd was out and about for a Friday night, it is wonderful to see so many people enjoying downtown again. I realize that I am in no shape to drive home, jeez look at me, it’s like all those years ago, every time Tristan and I got together the drinks just kept flowing and here I am too drunk to drive home. I decide I will take a taxi home, I have to, I can’t drive like this. I will tell Lawrence the valet to take care of my car for the evening. Yeah that is the best thing to do. I always park on the side of
The Ritz Carlton Hotel.

I make my way through the vestibule of the hotel to get to t
he street entrance when I glanced over at the lounge, they had a good crowd, the live music usually brings in the drinkers, a trio is playing as I look over but what catches my eye is him,
oh no!
there he is, the hair on the back of my neck is standing up, my pulse is racing, Tristan is sitting at a table in the bar, he left my store a little over two hours ago and he came here to what drink away his worries or ponder what he has done to me the look on his face says it all he is smoldering and laced with guilt.

I keep walking towards the exit he didn’t s
ee me he must be smashed beyond recognition by now for sure. I make my way past the bar entrance to the valet desk where Lawrence is attending to guest. I wait for a moment and he brings me back to the reason I am here.

“Miss Macy, how are you this evening
? I see your Cadillac is waiting for you as usual”

“Um Lawrence I‘m going to need a taxi and can you valet my car please?”

“Absolutely Miss. Macy right this way!” he leads me out the gold and glass doors that are held open by a white gloved Ritz Carlton doorman.

“Thank you James”

“My pleasure Miss Macy” James has been a door man at almost every Ritz all over the world he comes to us from Scotland I believe. I stand under the royal blue and white awning as the wind blows my brunette curly tendrils off my face.

Lawrence whistles f
or a taxi and one pulls up straight away, he opens the door for me with his white gloved service, I move to give him my keys but pull them back quickly, I don’t know what’s coming over me but I am not going home like a good fiancée.

“You know what I for
got something” I utter nervously as I check my watch which I can’t see anyway, due to the fact that I have been drinking for the better part of the evening.

Lawrence
shuts the taxi door and I walk around pass the crowd on the street and go into the side entrance of Tower Centre, where there is no doorman, I walk through the revolving door and see Tristan through the window, he definitely got his monies worth, that sharp suit has got me intrigued, his tie is loose and the top button is open at his neck, he takes a hit from his cigarette and the smoke surrounds him, he looks like the painting
Blvd. of broken dreams
, he is just missing Elvis, Marilyn and Bogart because he has always been the James Dean in my life, young and troubled.

I stand to the side of the window so he can’t see me as I just take him all in,
God he looks good, a portrait of my old heart’s desire.

After closer observation he is a trifle
bit thinner, he has always had the greatest shoulders squared and bold, and of course in that tailored jacket wow he is quite impressive actually, who knew he would clean up so good. I am a glutton for punishment I gotta know why.

I Lick my lips and open
the next button on my silk and lace blouse and I’m a girl on a fact finding mission as I make my way pass the vestibule of the Ritz Carlton I walk into the bar pass the hostess