A Very Russian Christmas (9 page)

“I don’t know how to use this.”

He wasn’t surprised. Her last vehicle had been thirteen or fourteen years old. The CD player had been the most technologically advanced item in it. “Here. I’ll show you.”

Because he had a similar vehicle in his collection, Nikolai was familiar with the interface. He showed her how easy it was to work the climate control and laughed at the scandalized look that crossed her face when he activated her seat warmer. When she handed over her MP3 player, he synced it up with the stereo so she could listen to her music while she drove.

“If I catch you texting or talking while you drive, I will be extremely disappointed, Vee.” He held her gaze a moment before establishing the Bluetooth connection between her phone and the car. “Promise me that you will be safe.”

“I promise I’ll be safe if I drive.”

“If?” He seized on the word as he dropped her phone into a cup holder. “What do you mean
if
?”

She traced the stitching along the curve of the steering wheel. “I don’t think I can accept this car, Nikolai. It’s…too much.” She fingered the diamond bracelet he had given her last year. “This was borderline, but I accepted it because I saw happy it made you to give it to me. This car?” She ran her hand along the dash. “It’s just way, way overboard for a gift between friends.”

Between friends.
The words shouldn’t have gutted him but they did.

“I want you to have it, Vee.” He slashed his hand through the air. “This isn’t up for discussion. You’re keeping it.”

She stared at him for an unnervingly long moment. “I’m not a member of your crew, Nikolai. You don’t get to use that tone with me.”

Remembering the way he had hurt her feelings back at the party, he sought to make things right. “I shouldn’t have been so short with you when you needled me about which boss I was tonight. That was wrong of me, and I’m sorry if it hurt you.”

“You did, but I know I crossed a line. Sometimes I forget that our friendship has rules.” She shrugged, as if nervous, and admitted, “I don’t always know what we are or what we’re doing.”

He didn’t either. The last few weeks, especially, he seemed to be skating dangerously close to
that
line with her. “We’re friends. I’m your protector. I’m the man you come to when you have a problem that needs solving.”

“Is that all you are to me?” She asked the question as if she didn’t know the answer.

God, how he wanted to be more. He wanted to be
everything
to her. “It’s all I can be, Vivian.”

She studied his face and then exhaled slowly. “Okay.”

“You’ll keep the car?”

She picked up her MP3 player and chose a Christmas playlist. “No.”

“Vee—”

“This car costs, like, five times what I earn in a year between working at the restaurant and selling some of my paintings. It is way, way beyond my means to keep it insured and do the required maintenance. It’s beautiful, Nikolai, but it’s not the car for me.”

Recognizing that stubborn streak, he decided to table the discussion for tonight. He had absolutely zero intention of letting her give the car back. If she refused to keep the keys, he would leave it parked in front of her apartment building until she changed her mind. Two could play this game—and he would win.

“The car has a service package. You just take it to Alexei Sarnov’s dealership, and they’ll handle everything. I’ve already arranged your insurance policy.” She narrowed her eyes at him, and he held up his hands. “All right. I’ll stop.”

Despite her protestations about keeping the vehicle, it was clear that she loved driving it as she carefully navigated the wet streets and the surprisingly empty interstate. When they reached her apartment complex, she parked carefully and seemed almost reluctant to shut down the engine. He wanted to ask her if she had changed her mind but let the question die on his tongue.

“Come inside with me. I’ll give you your gift since we’re breaking tradition this year.”

“All right.” Kostya had pulled into a nearby space so he slid out of the front seat, ambled over to the SUV and retrieved all the gifts Vivian’s admirers had given her at the Christmas party. Annoyed with her reaction to the car, he wondered if she had turned down any of these men’s gifts. Not that it was the same situation, of course. Aaron, Oleg and the others who had given her pretty things to make her smile all offered her something he never could. They were openly attempting to court Vivian while he was…

Well. What was he doing exactly? One moment, he wanted to drag her close and forever bind her to his side. The next, he pushed her away to keep her safe lest any of his enemies realize how desperately he loved her. He could only imagine how confused she was by the way he ran hot and cold with her. Hell, he was fucking confused himself!

Inside the apartment she shared with Lena, he noticed the stack of flattened moving boxes in one corner of the living room. He placed her pile of gifts on the couch and motioned toward the boxes. “So she’s decided to move in with Yuri?”

“I don’t think there was ever much of a decision there.” Vivian peeled out of her coat, tucked the gloves into the pockets and hung it on the coat tree near the door. “You know how Yuri is when he decides he wants something. He’s utterly possessive of her and hopelessly in love with her. She’s head over heels for him too. I’m sure it didn’t take much to convince her to move into his mansion.”

“I’ve never seen him happier. He’ll be good to her and treat her right. She will never want for anything.”

“It’s not the money that she wants. It’s Yuri. She loves him. Like—
for real
,” Vivian said definitively. “If they aren’t married by next Christmas, I’ll be shocked.”

“Erin and Ivan too,” he said, thinking of the way Ivan had confessed his plans to propose.

“Oh, yeah, definitely,” Vivian agreed. “Erin thinks Ivan hung the freaking moon, and Ivan worships her. I’ll call it right now. They’ll be hitched by summer.”

“If Ivan has his way, he’ll rush her down to the courthouse or elope to Vegas to make her his as quickly as possible.”

“I’m sure Ivan would prefer that route,” she said with a laugh. “But I know Erin. Once she starts talking wedding dresses and receptions, Ivan will just melt and give her whatever she wants. He’ll make sure she has the fairytale wedding of her dreams.”

He almost asked her what her dream wedding was like but caught himself.
What the hell are you thinking? Get your gift and go.

Vivian crouched down to grab a box wrapped in shiny gold paper from under the short Christmas tree in the other corner of the living room. Holding it tight to her chest, she said, “This isn’t a luxury sports car, but it’s something I hope you’ll love.”

“Should I open it now?” He accepted the box from her and was surprised by the weight. Whatever was inside was heavy and wide.

She fluffed the bow decorating the box and shrugged. “If you want.”

“I do.” He tugged on the ribbon to release the knot, set aside the lid of the box and pushed apart the white tissue paper to reveal an exquisitely handcrafted scrapbook. “Did you make this?”

Unable to hide her hopeful smile, she nodded. “I took a class last fall about making books, the covers and spines and all that. I thought I would make one for us—for Samovar, I mean.” She quickly corrected herself lest he get the idea that she meant for the two of them.

Putting the bottom half of the box on the couch behind him, he held the substantial scrapbook in his hands and slowly turned the pages. She had used her incredible talent to draw and paint backgrounds and captions. Divided into twelve sections, the book took him through a year’s worth of celebrations.

“I left some blank pages at the back for tonight’s Christmas party photos and the usual New Year’s Eve celebration pics.”

“This is amazing, Vee.”

“It’s easy to forget how many people come through the front doors at Samovar and how many of them come there to celebrate such wonderful occasions. Birthdays, engagements, weddings, baby showers, first dates—that building means a lot to so many people.” She tapped a picture of a newly married couple sharing their first dance. “I want you to remember how much happiness you bring people.”

The startling realization that he was the source of something so wonderful struck him hard. Every morning, he woke up feeling the weight of his responsibility to the shady underworld of Houston, and every night he went to sleep feeling as if he had done only terrible things. Now, staring him in the face, was the evidence that he wasn’t as horrible as he often thought. Maybe, just maybe, there was something good within him still.

“Thank you, Vee.” Voice husky with emotion, he fought the urge to lower his mouth and claim her lips in a sweet kiss. Finally tasting her would the perfect end to this tender moment. “I don’t even know what to say.”

“Thank you is enough.”

It wasn’t. It wasn’t nearly enough. “You truly are the most wonderful person I have ever known.”

Her lips quirked with disbelief. “When you met me, I was bleeding out in your neighbor’s front yard because I had been shot and fell out of the window of a house I was trying to rob with my ex-con dad. That’s hardly wonderful, Kolya.”

His gut clenched so painfully at the memory of that night when little eleven-year-old Vee had crashed into his life. It was a night filled with secrets that threatened everything they now shared. It was a night that would haunt him forever.

“You know what I am, Vee. Compared to me, the few mistakes you’ve made are absolutely nothing.” He broke his rule about touching her intimately and caressed her cheek with his knuckles. Her face registered the shock of being touched in that way, but she didn’t pull away from him. In fact, she moved fractionally closer and breathed in an excited breath.

For the briefest of seconds, he seriously considered saying fuck it to the rules he had put in place to protect them both. In his mind’s eye, he could see himself capturing that sweet mouth of hers and darting his tongue between her lips. Vee would grip his shirt and hold on for dear life as he kissed her with the all the pent-up passion and need that had been shoved down deep and locked away within him. His love for her would ignite something primal and real between them…

And then what?

He cast aside the foolish fantasy that tempted him so cruelly. There was no way to have her and keep her safe. He refused to drag her any deeper into the terrible world she had escaped when she had survived being shot as a juvenile delinquent. Everything that was wild and innocent within her deserved a chance to blossom. The darkness that haunted him would snuff all that out like a bloom caught in an early frost.

Dragging away his hand, he stepped back and cleared his throat. “I should go. I’m sure Kostya has plans.”

She smiled at him and handed him the two halves of the gift box before moving to her coat and taking out the keys to her new car. “Take these with you.”

“Vee,” he said warningly.

“Nikolai,” she returned just as haughtily. With a daring look, she slipped the keys into the front pocket on his wool coat. It was all he could do to stifle the groan that threatened to erupt from his throat as her small hand brushed against his body. A little more to the left and she might have gotten quite an education.

He frowned down at her. “I’m not taking the car back. It’s yours. It’s staying out there until you come to your senses.”

“Be reasonable.”

“You be reasonable. You need a vehicle. I gave you a vehicle. It’s that simple.”

“It’s anything but simple. The cost—”

“It’s my money to spend however I choose, Vee. It pleases me to give you nice things.”

“Why?”

Boxed into a corner, he chose his words carefully. “Because you are the most important person in the world to me.”

“Me?”

“You.”

She narrowed her eyes. “Not Ivan or Yuri or Dimitri or Kostya?”

“They’re grown men. They’re quite capable of caring for themselves.”

“I’m a grown woman. I’m quite capable of taking care of myself.”

“Yes, you are,” he agreed. “You’ve accomplished so much despite everything that the world has thrown at you. This is my way of rewarding you for working so hard and achieving so much.”

She opened her mouth to argue with him, but he shook his head and wagged his finger. “No more arguing tonight. We’ll table this discussion for a few days. After the New Year, we’ll talk.”

“You mean you’ll talk
at
me,” she groused knowingly.

His lips slanted with amusement. “Oh, something tells me that you’ll have plenty to say back to me.”

Not even his closest friends dared to tell him off as often as she did. Of course, she did it with a smile and always with gentle words so it was hard to get upset with her. He had a sneaking suspicion that Vee cursing him out would probably only arouse him. That fiery side of her that he sometimes glimpsed always made him hot. He liked that she wasn’t afraid of telling him what he
needed
to hear instead of what he
wanted
to hear as most people did.

She walked him to the door but stopped him before he could leave. Grasping his hand, she gave it a squeeze. “The car is beautiful, and I’m touched by the thought you put into it.”