A Thousand Deaths (10 page)

"It was always called Home," said the boy. "I asked TECT about that once months and months ago, and it said that the first gang of people it sent here named the planet Home. I would have picked a better name for it."

Courane knew what was coming. "I'm sure you would have," he said.

There was an expectant silence. It stretched on and on, with neither Courane nor Shai breaking down to ask Kenny what he would have chosen instead.

"I gave it a lot of thought," said Kenny at last, "and I would have called the place Schmotz." He looked around. Shai was smiling, but Courane just looked impatient.

"Why Schmotz?" asked Shai.

Kenny's expression indicated that he thought the answer was self-evident. "How can you be afraid of a place called Schmotz?" he said.

 

When Courane had been on Planet D, or Home, for a few days, he noticed something odd. He was wandering around the grounds during a free hour. At the back of the house was a porch and a small yard with some tables and chairs and a narrow path leading down to the river. At the front of the house was the wide field of high red grasses through which he had waded on his arrival. To one side was the barn and silo which, together with the house itself, partially enclosed the barnyard. On the opposite side of the house were the pastures and the cultivated fields. Courane found nothing unusual, and that bothered him. He felt something was missing. He looked all around; the river formed a definite boundary in one direction, but in the other three there was flat land covered with waving grass and dotted with trees, and the high growth came right up to the edge of the clearing the people had made for themselves. At the horizon were low hills. There were no other landmarks. Courane was puzzled because he didn't know where the cemetery was.

The colony had been on Planet D for one hundred and twenty- four years, and it was made up of a few hard-working prisoners and a dozen or so people suffering from D syndrome. To Courane that meant that scores, even hundreds of people had died on the planet since the beginning of the colony, and so they must have been buried in some plot of ground that ought to be recognizable from the house. But he saw nothing. Maybe it was the custom to take the bodies out and bury them in unmarked graves within the shelter of the red grass. Courane went to find Arthur. Alohilani had mentioned that he had been assigned to take charge of Zofia's funeral arrangements.

"What funeral arrangements?" asked Arthur. He was genuinely puzzled.

Courane frowned. "I just thought that if such a great custom has evolved of seeing everyone off at their dying moment, that there was probably something of a similar nature to be done at their burial."

Arthur shook his head emphatically. "We don't bury anyone here," he said.

"Why not?"

"What else? TECT has given us other instructions. That's the way things have been since the year one here. After a person dies, we put him in the medic box and leave the room. TECT ordered that no one should enter that room again for a full day. It didn't specify an Earth day or one of ours, so we stay away for a twenty-seven-hour Planet D day just to be sure."

"But why?"

"I don't know. But as soon as the corpse is put in the medic box, TECT must diagnose and realize the patient's dead. What happens after that I don't know, but a day later the body is gone. Always. No one knows why."

"What could TECT want with the bodies?" asked Courane.

"Nothing," said Arthur. "I just think they're sent back to Earth for proper burial."

"I'd like to think so, too," said Courane, "but you don't have a teletrans unit in the medic box, do you?"

"Of course not." Arthur had known the flaw in his explanation, but he preferred to believe in it rather than try to outguess the devious reasoning of TECT.

"Well, what other theories do you have?"

Arthur stared for a moment. "Other theories?" he said. "I don't have any other theories. I don't need any other theories. Do you think there's something wrong?"

"No, no," said Courane quickly. "I'm just trying to understand your life here as quickly as I can."

"Okay, fine," said Arthur. He sounded suddenly very tired of the conversation. "If it's so important to you, maybe you can find out what happens to the bodies."

"Maybe I will," said Courane thoughtfully.

 

When he decided to go on, his arms still ached. They had given him a lot of trouble all morning. Now his hands throbbed and his fingers refused to close into fists. He looked at his hands. They trembled visibly. Courane knew that he was sick, that he had to get help soon. But there was no help for him in the desert. The hills were nearer now, but they didn't look as if they promised any help either. Beyond the hills, that was where he must be going. What was beyond the hills? Courane couldn't remember. He looked at his hands again for a few seconds, but they made him nervous. He clasped his arms across his chest and tucked the hands under his armpits. Then he walked on toward the hills.

He had known for about an hour that the ground was rising. He was coming out of the desert valley. The stones underfoot had been the size of large eggs. Now they were all gone and Courane walked on dry mud as hard as concrete, split with wide cracks. Perhaps in the spring this was the bed of a river. Now though it was only unyielding yellow soil. There were small tufts of rough brown weeds growing here and there. It wasn't quite as dead and hopeless as the desert he had already crossed. He kept his hands under his arms, tightly hugging his chest to stop their nervous trembling. He whistled a march tune because he thought it might raise his spirits, and he knew that he always walked to the beat of anything he whistled or hummed. He whistled it rather
allegro
, because the hills were still too far away.

 

The red ADVISE light was lit on the tect, and Courane was the only one around the house to notice it. He identified himself to the console and waited for the message.

 

**COURANE, Sandor —ExtT— Excar Ep Er IV

M232-86-059-41Maj

Or ANYONE

17:48:19 15 May 7 YT - TECTGreet**

**COURANE, Sandor: 
Notification of additional program. Reinstitution of Therapy Group (Instructions follow).
 

**COURANE, Sandor: 
Hello, COURANE, Sandor! How are you? It is nice to speak at you once again. TECT in the name of the Representative hopes that you are comfortable in your new home, and that you have begun the series of adjustments essential to your complete assimilation. You have been on Planet D now for four months, four days, five hours, forty-eight minutes, and twenty-nine seconds. No doubt you have looked around, met everyone, settled yourself, and begun to realize just how pleasant Planet D is.
 

**COURANE, Sandor: 
No indication that the addressee wishes to offer profuse thanks is necessary. TECT in the name of the Representative understands your feelings and wishes you to know that you are entirely welcome.
 

**COURANE, Sandor: 
However, TECT in the name of the Representative concedes that some individuals do not respond so positively. Indeed, some people cry and plead and carry on in a totally unacceptable manner. Some people have never grown up, and no doubt there are some members of your community on Planet D who fall into this category.
 

**COURANE, Sandor: 
If you wish to enter the names of individuals who fall into this category, either there on Planet D or from your former life on Earth, TECT in the name of the Representative will consider it a generous act of patriotism, commendable in every way, and a notation to that effect will be made in your permanent personal file that may someday be of some benefit to you.
 

**COURANE, Sandor:  
Enter names**

 

Courane thought about it for a moment and was tempted to put in the name of his foreman in Tokyo, Sokol, who had gotten him into trouble, and Mr. Masutani, and an Arab forward who once deliberately gave him an elbow in the throat and was never called for it. But after he considered it, he decided against putting down anyone's name. They might end up on some colony themselves—maybe even Planet D—and he didn't want to be responsible for that.

 

**COURANE, Sandor: 
You have chosen not to enter names in compliance with the above suggestion. That will be noted in your permanent personal file. Either you live by an outmoded code of ethics, or you have lived a charmed life and have no grievances against anyone.
 

**COURANE, Sandor: 
Be that as it may. The real purpose of this communication is to instruct you that the quarterly group therapy session will be held tomorrow, 15 May, 7 YT, at 12:00:00 (35 Gai, 124, at 03:42:55). It will be held in this room so that TECT in the name of the Representative may listen to the comments of the participants and offer insights that may prove valuable in relieving tensions and solving petty problems.

**COURANE, Sandor: 
The leader for the discussion will be NUSSEL, Sheldon, unless he is indisposed. In that event the leader will be STANEK, Molly. In the event that both people are indisposed, please inform TECT in the name of the Representative and provide a list of community members who are able to assume the duties of group leader.
 

**COURANE, Sandor: 
Understanding of the above to be indicated.
 

**COURANE, Sandor:  
Affirm?**

 

"Yes," said Courane, but he didn't really understand it at all. He assumed that Sheldon would know what was going on, though.

Everyone was just a little annoyed that TECT had called for the session at three o'clock in the morning. TECT didn't sleep, of course, and there was no reason in the world (either world, Earth or Planet D) why the session couldn't have been scheduled for some time more convenient to the colonists. But, as Goldie said, that was just one of TECT's funny little quirks.

They all sat on chairs in a semicircle facing the tect s console, as TECT was a doctor who would have enlightening things to say. Molly told Courane that she had sat through several of these meetings, and TECT had only interrupted to comment on two occasions. One time, everyone had reacted to a note someone passed around, and TECT wanted to know what the laughter was all about. The note had to be read aloud and its author identified. Another time, TECT had directed the group's temporary leader to sedate a group member who was threatening violence toward the others and the console's screen as well.

"Well," said Sheldon, obviously uncomfortable, "does anyone recall where we left off last time?"

"That was almost three months ago," said Alohilani. "I think we were discussing the possibility of having jobs assigned semi-permanently, for periods of ten weeks."

"That's right," said Daan. "Iola said that if someone has a job he particularly enjoys, and it's agreeable to everyone else, there's no reason why that person couldn't have that job as long as he wants. And if someone really hates something, I don't think we should force him to have to do it."

"I'll tell you what I hate," said Fletcher. "I hate just being here. How about that? What can you do about it? If you ask me, I don't want to have a damn thing to do with your farm."

"You can go hungry, too," said Arthur.

"You see how good this is for everybody?" whispered Kenny to Courane.

"Speak up," said Sheldon. He knew that if he didn't have Kenny repeat his words louder, TECT would demand to hear them.

"I said, 'This is good for everybody.' " He winked at Courane.

"What the hell are these meetings for?" asked Fletcher. "Nothing ever gets done. Nobody ever makes any good comments. Just people complain about this thing and that thing, and people accuse other people of one candy-ass thing after another. I don't think this is anything but a pain and a well-known drag."

Sheldon wondered if it was his duty to defend TECT's therapy sessions. "Look, Fletcher, if we air these gripes now, they won't cause as much trouble as if we just let them grow inside us. You can sound off anyway you want to, and I can, too, and it's good for all of us. TECT knows what's best. It's studied our community for over a hundred years. The best experts on Earth say that this kind of group will help to keep us healthy in mind and body."

"Experts on Earth!" Fletcher got up and took a few steps toward the tect. He laughed, a sound totally without humor. "Experts. As long as they stay on Earth, I don't care what they say. They don't know nothing about living here, Cap. They don't know enough to tell me how to tie my shoe. On Earth, that's where they are, and they've never even seen this place. They don't even know what we eat for breakfast. I don't listen to nobody unless they been here and met the bug, Cap."

"The bug?" asked Molly. "What do you mean?"

"I mean unless they shook hands with the bug. The forgetting bug. You know what I mean." He looked around the room. Obviously some of the group understood—Sheldon, Molly, Alohilani, each of whom had suffered their first symptom of D syndrome, and Daan and Courane, who had witnessed the behavior and understood. Courane didn't know if Kenny, Arthur, Rachel, and Goldie knew what the black man meant.

Fletcher continued defiantly. "You got to get down in the mud and kiss the frog, Cap, otherwise you're just throwing paper airplanes out of your tower window. You understand what I mean?"

Sheldon looked more uncomfortable than ever. "Yes, I think so. You don't feel anyone's advice is worth taking unless he's been here, too, and experienced the conditions."

"You got it," said Fletcher. He flashed a quick grin and sat down again.

"Anyone else have anything to add?"

Courane spoke up a little hesitantly. "I think Fletcher makes a lot of sense."

The red light on the tect lit and blinked furiously. Everyone in the group watched it for a few seconds.

"Oops," said Courane. He saw a brief look of triumph cross Fletcher's handsome face.

 

"Why am I here?" asked Nneka. This was the day after she came to Home, during a fierce Otho blizzard.