A Risky Proposition (17 page)

Sunny and I exchanged a baffled glance.

Angelica groaned in misery, looking like she’d have rather been anywhere else.  “I am a succubus, you see.  By my very nature, I am inextricably linked to the sexual desires of mortals.  I have been experiencing some difficulty lately, however, with controlling my response to the call of passion.”

“Uh
huh
,” grunted Sunny, eyeing Angelica dubiously.  “So, someone decides they’re in the mood for a booty call and you just snap your fingers and show up.  And then what?”

Angelica’s expression turned earnest.  “Well, usually I would grant their every sexual fantasy and desire, until they were limp with satisfied exhaustion.”

Sunny’s eyes grew comically wide, and I was pretty sure mine were about to pop out of my head as well.  I guessed that’s what I got for assuming my mind was incapable of being blown further.

“But after millennia of being at the sexual beck and call of countless aroused mortals,” Angelica continued, “one begins to wonder if there isn’t more to life.  I began to resent the invasions of my privacy and gradually reduced the number of calls I answered, until I ceased answering them altogether.  Many of my kind have shunned me for my decision to embrace celibacy, but it is my life and I feel I should be able to live it according to my choosing.”  Her voice had taken on a decidedly stubborn tone.

Unable to peel my eyes from her, I cleared the dryness from my throat as I tried to form a response.  “Of course you should,” I agreed hoarsely.  So that was where the whole ‘right to privacy’ and ‘conduct our lives the way we see fit’ rant had come from when she’d agreed not to reveal Jasper’s presence to hotel management.

“So, how come you showed up for Syd’s little moaning session about not getting any?” Sunny asked, her voice falling somewhere between sympathy and glee.

I tossed a throw pillow at her.  It missed and landed next to Jasper, who looked up from his interrupted nap with a green glare.

Angelica frowned helplessly.  “It seems my decision to deny my natural tendencies has had an unexpected side effect.  The longer I go without sexual gratification, the harder it becomes to deny the call of passion—any call of passion.  Normally succubi and incubi are able to pick and choose which calls they answer.  And we generally will go to a mortal during the dream state, so that they believe they have simply experienced an unusually erotic dream. 

“But the intensity of Sydney’s sexual frustration called to mine and I was unable to resist.  So far, I have been able to conceal my presence when this has happened—however it becomes more and more difficult.  I have not yet figured out how to resolve this problem,” she explained in an apologetic tone.

“Um, I can see how fulfilling everyone else’s desires all the time could get pretty tiresome,” I offered, “but although celibacy can be good for certain people, it seems like maybe it’s a rather drastic approach for someone like you.  Have you considered having a relationship with just one person?  You know—someone who’s aware that you’re a succubus and doesn’t mind helping you ignore all those…calls of passion?”

“Yeah,” Sunny enthused, “someone who’ll get together for your steamy little trysts at times that are convenient for both of you!”

Angelica stared at us with an expression akin to horror.  “Monogamy?” she whispered, her pert nose wrinkling in disgust.

Sunny snorted.

“Well, yeah,” I chuckled.  “How much worse could it be than celibacy?”

“Succubi are
not
monogamous creatures,” Angelica denied vehemently.

“Well, apparently they’re not celibate creatures either.”  Sunny was laughing openly now.

I shrugged.  “You could at least give it a try.  It might ease some of that pent-up frustration that has you popping up unexpectedly in people’s living rooms,” I said with a pointed smile.

The look on Angelica’s face reminded me of the first time my Grandma had scooped a pile of creamed spinach onto my plate.  I couldn’t believe I was actually supposed to put something that disgusting-looking into my mouth.

“You might be right.”  She sounded shocked that she was even considering such a thing.  “I suppose I could give it a try.”

“I bet you could have any man—or woman—you wanted,” Sunny offered.

“I’m sure you could,” I agreed with a glance at her perfect figure. 

“Just do me a favor,” I added, “and don’t choose a half-human, half-sidhe named Patrick Sparrow.  I don’t think I could take another man cheating on me.” 

Whoa.  Where had that come from?  Sparrow and I weren’t together—i.e. it was none of my business who he slept with.  I really needed to get a handle on the teenage crush thing.

“So you
do
have a handsome man to bring you many orgasms!” Angelica said, regaining some of her usual spark.  “I hope you have allowed him to stand and enter you from behind while you knelt on that bed of yours.  And the couch!  You must have lowered yourself onto his beautiful erection while he sat on the couch.  Tell me, which did you prefer?”

I choked, feeling heat suffuse my face until I was sure it must be glowing candy-apple red.  Sunny howled with laughter, tears streaming from her eyes.  Angelica looked at us in bewilderment.  “What?” she asked.

“I’m afraid Syd hasn’t had the chance to experience Patrick’s beautiful erection yet,” Sunny wheezed.  “Hence, her sexual frustration.”

“Oh, right,” Angelica frowned.  “Well, why has this man not granted you the fulfillment you deserve?” she asked in an affronted tone.  “Does he prefer men?”  She gave me a look of sympathy.

I closed my eyes in mortification.

“Uh no, I think it’s quite possible that he prefers Syd,” Sunny interjected on my behalf, still chortling gleefully. 

In deference to my crush, I had described all of my Sparrow encounters in minute detail for Sunny.  She agreed that, although he seemed to be holding back, he acted as if he was interested in me.

“Some humans tend to be a little more reticent about their sexual practices than you are, though, Angelica,” Sunny continued with a snigger.  “They go through this whole ritual of getting to know each other first—maybe a little kissing here and there, then some hot and heavy foreplay—before they actually jump into the sack together. 

“Syd and Patrick have only met a few times and they aren’t to the erection sharing stage just yet.  Plus, Syd has been a little preoccupied lately with finding her way out of a death djinn contract.  Not to mention that she’s still married to her loser of a cheating husband.”

“Why don’t you just lay it all on the table,” I grumped.

I felt a soft, warm probing, like a spot of concentrated sunlight hitting my chest.  “But your soul is still intact, Sydney,” Angelica informed me, concern etching her voice.  “How can you have completed a contract with a death djinn?”

“Oh, it’s not completed yet,” I assured her.  “I have one more wish to go.”

“Oh Sydney, this is no good!  You must not give in and make that wish, no matter what they promise you.  Nothing is worth the eternal enslavement of your soul! 

“Certain of my kind have been known to deal in the soul trade, using their powers to bestow ultimate pleasure as their bargaining tools.  It is an evil business.  Death djinns will promise the same; you must remain strong.  I know several very talented and upstanding incubi who would be happy to relieve your sexual frustration, so that you will not be as tempted by the death djinns,” she offered.

“Uh, thanks, Angelica.  That’s very kind of you—but I think I’ll hold off on going that route until the situation becomes a little more desperate,” I declined, trying my best to sound appreciative. 

Come to think of it, I probably would have taken her up on it if I hadn’t had Sparrow on the brain—or more aptly, other parts of my anatomy.  Who was I kidding—how much more desperate could it get?

“Well, if you’re sure,” she said doubtfully.  “Why do you not simply enjoy sexual congress with the man you have married, then?  Is that not what humans do?”

“I told you—he cheated on her,” Sunny interjected with a sympathetic wince in my direction.

Angelica looked at both of us in confusion.

“The monogamy thing,” I mumbled.

“Oh,” Sunny said in sudden comprehension. 

She began a hasty explanation for Angelica, presumably so that I wouldn’t have to. 

“Syd’s husband had sex with someone else.  Generally when two humans marry, they both expect the other person to remain sexually faithful only to them for as long as they’re married.  It’s like a promise they make to each other.  If one person breaks that promise, it’s a serious betrayal.  Some couples work it out, but others are unwilling to accept the betrayal and can no longer be happy remaining in the marriage.”

Angelica nodded slowly, as if she was trying hard to grasp the concept.  “It is not in my nature to embrace this monogamy you seem to prize so highly.  But if you claim that your husband engaging in acts of sexual pleasure with another was a betrayal, then I will accept your judgment. 

“I know some rather vile little imps that delight in causing mayhem and destruction.  Would you like for me to send them to his home to wreak havoc as punishment for this betrayal?”

Sunny watched me with horrified amusement.  And I found myself pausing in serious consideration, before letting out a regretful sigh. 

“That’s very sweet of you, Angelica, but the house is half mine, so I really don’t want it destroyed.  Plus it would probably give me bad karma, and Goddess knows I don’t need any more of that. 

“Although,” I added thoughtfully, “maybe it wouldn’t be
too
bad if they wrought just a
tiny bit
of havoc at his office.  Not only on him, but on that little tramp he cheated on me with.”

Sunny’s eyes widened and I shot her a wicked grin.

“Hmm,” Angelica mused, “I don’t think these particular imps would be good for such a job.  They would be very difficult to restrain once released.  But I will think about it and let you know when I have come up with a more appropriate reprisal for your husband and this…‘tramp’.”

Sunny snorted.

“So, you forgive me for intruding in this manner?” Angelica asked uncertainly.

“Don’t give it another thought,” I assured her, “you’re welcome any time.  But I still think you should try the monogamy thing—if only to regain your control.”

“I thank you for the advice.”  Angelica grinned.  “I should probably go and leave you to your plans for the day.  Do you mind if I just blink out instead of using the door?”

“Doesn’t bother me in the least,” I said.  “Sunny?”

“Uh, no, fine with me—but can I talk to you for a second before you go?” Sunny asked hesitantly. 

She rose and motioned for Angelica to follow.  I watched in bemusement as they whispered to each other briefly in the corner.  Sunny returned to the living room with a secret smile as Angelica gave a final wave and blinked out.

“What was that about?” I asked with a bland expression.

“I’ll tell you later, I promise,” Sunny answered with glee.

“Hey—I’m your best friend—we’re not supposed to keep secrets from each other!  Was it about me?” I demanded.

“No,” she tsked at me.  “It was a personal sexual concern and I wanted the unique perspective of a succubus.  I’ll let you know how it works out after I try her recommendation.”

“I can’t believe you’re not going to tell me.  After all the years we’ve known each other,” I said in a wounded voice

“Oh, fine.  Have it your way,” she said sulkily.  “I asked her about sending those incubi to me, since you didn’t seem interested in taking her up on the offer.  I would have told you about it afterward.”

“Unique perspective of a succubus, my ass.”  I dissolved into helpless laughter.  Sunny struggled to hold onto her sulky expression for a moment, but couldn’t quite manage it and erupted into giggles.

“I haven’t had this much fun in ages!” she gasped finally.  “Who knew Palm Beach was such a hotbed of supernatural activity?”

“Does it really surprise you?” I groaned, my stomach hurting from the laughter.

“So what’s next on the agenda?”

“Well, we might as well pay a visit to Ophelia,” I suggested, still wiping away tears of mirth.

“Sounds good to me,” Sunny agreed.  “Think it’s too much to hope that she’ll be as entertaining as Angelica?”

“Only one way to find out,” I replied, heading for the phone.

 
∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

 
“Hi, could you connect me to Ophelia Jameson in the 8
^th
floor penthouse?”

“Certainly, one moment please,” came the polite reply.

The line clicked during the transfer, then began ringing.  Sunny watched me expectantly. 

I huffed in disappointment after the fifth ring.  “She’s not answering.”

“Maybe she’s out.”  Sunny shrugged.

I continued to hold onto the stubborn hope that she would pick up, but after the tenth ring Sunny said, “We’ll just try her later, Syd.”