A Place of Hope (26 page)

‘Well, let’s hope that one of our problems can be sorted,’ Emily said, trying to sound more cheerful.

Just then, the doorbell rang.

‘I’ll get it,’ Chad yelled.

He opened the door, gasping at the sight of the woman standing there, arms akimbo, looking at him as if he’d just committed a major crime. He couldn’t for a moment or two speak or even think straight, as images and memories cascaded through his brain.

‘Edward John Chadderley, what the hell are you doing here?’ she snapped. ‘Why did you run away from the hospital? Have you any
idea
of the trouble you’ve caused me?’

He took a step backwards, his hands going up to his head, which was throbbing and hurting. Unable to hold back a groan, he staggered sideways just as Emily came into the hall. She ran forward in time to steady him, calling, ‘Oliver! Oliver, come quickly!’

‘Get your hands off my husband!’ yelled the woman in a very piercing voice, following them into the building.

Emily ignored her and guided Chad to a nearby table. He sank down on a chair, continuing to hold his head. Small sounds of pain still escaped his control.

‘Who are you?’ Oliver asked the woman.

‘His wife.’ She pointed to Chad.

‘Oh. You’d better sit down, then.’

‘I certainly had. It’s obvious that my husband shouldn’t have left hospital and I intend to make sure he goes back and gets the treatment he needs.’

She marched forward and yanked Emily’s hand away from Chad’s shoulder. ‘Leave my husband alone.’ She tried to put her arm round Chad’s shoulders, but he pushed her away.

Letting out a long, quivering sigh, he looked from one side to the other. Emily had folded her hands in her lap and was waiting, as quiet and composed as ever. Oh, how admirable her calmness, especially in the face of his wife’s anger and shrillness.

Her name came back to him. ‘Marina.’ With it came images of quarrels and shouting.

She frowned. ‘They said you wouldn’t remember anything else.’

‘They were wrong.’

‘You should go back and let them help you.’ She wasn’t shouting now, but her voice had a sharp edge to it and the looks she gave Emily would have soured milk.

‘I’m not going back. They weren’t helping me.’ Why was she urging him to go back to the hospital? Was it possible . . . had she too been paying Pauline to keep him locked away?

‘What
do
you remember?’ she demanded.

‘Not much, but I’m remembering more every day. Only I don’t remember our life together, just quarrels and shouting. Why can’t I remember being
with
you?’ He saw an expression of relief cross her face, or thought he did.

‘How the hell should I know why you remember one thing and not another? I’m not a doctor.’

‘If you knew about me, knew I’d lost my memory, why didn’t you come to visit me in hospital? Why didn’t you identify me, bring me clothes, books, all the sorts of things a person needs to make life comfortable?’

‘I did come to visit you. When you were first moved to that place.’ She shuddered. ‘You were sedated, in no state to remember anything, and that sister said you likely never would. She suggested I wait for a while, see if you could recover.’

‘She told me no one had come forward.’

Marina shrugged. ‘I asked her to say that. You and I hadn’t been getting on too well. I thought the sight of me might upset you. I took over the business and left you to the medical experts. Pauline would have let me know if you’d remembered who you were, if it was time to visit you.’

But Marina was avoiding his eyes. ‘I don’t believe you,’ he said in a voice flat with certainty.

‘I don’t think you’re in a fit state to make judgements. Someone had to run the business, after all. You should be grateful to me for that.’

‘What business?’

‘You haven’t remembered much, have you, if you don’t remember your precious business?’ She jerked her head in Emily’s direction. ‘But you’ve recovered enough to go back to your old ways and find yourself another woman. You always do.’

He turned to Emily. ‘I haven’t remembered much, but I do remember this about my so-called wife.
Don’t believe a word she says.
’

Marina threw back her head and laughed harshly. ‘Trying to take the moral high ground, are you? Well, it won’t work. Who’ll believe an idiot who didn’t even remember his own name until I told him?’

She looked past him to Emily. ‘I hope you haven’t been stupid enough to give him money, or it’ll vanish. He’s very good at getting money from people. He looks as if butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth, but he’s a clever con artist.’

‘What business?’ Chad repeated.

She let out a scornful sniff. ‘I’ll tell you more when you remember – or when you go back to let the experts help you.’ She stood up. ‘Here. After you’ve got your wits together, phone me and we’ll go into things.’

He glanced at the card. ‘This isn’t a business card.’

‘No. It’s just my mobile phone number. I’m not having you coming back and messing things up just as I’m sorting them out.’ She looked at Emily. ‘He’s a lousy businessman, too. Don’t trust him an inch.’

Emily studied them both and then linked her arm in Chad’s. ‘I trust him absolutely.’

‘More fool you.’ Marina stood up and made her way towards the door.

‘Aren’t you going to go after her, insist she tells you more about the business?’ Emily asked.

‘No. I don’t want anything to do with her. I intend to deal with her formally.’ He pulled her suddenly close. ‘Thank you.’

‘What for?’

‘Believing in me.’

Oliver had followed Marina out and now came back inside. He fished out a pencil and notebook and wrote something down in it. ‘Just taking note of her car number plate. It might be of some help. Who knows?’

Chad stood up. ‘I need to think. On my own.’ He looked at Emily. ‘You won’t . . . do anything rash?’

She returned his gaze. ‘For what it’s worth, I wouldn’t buy a used car from her.’

He gave her a wry smile, then walked out, going through the back bar towards the barn.

Rachel fanned her face as if she was too hot. ‘Phew! A thrill a minute here. Mind you, I’d not buy a used car from her, either. There was something about her face that I didn’t like.’

She followed Emily’s gaze. ‘I can see why Chad needs to be on his own.’

‘So can I. But I want to help him.’

Rachel smiled gently. ‘You have helped him and you’re still helping him, but he needs to stand on his own feet if he’s to keep his self-respect, don’t you think? Especially after what she said.’

Chad wandered into the old barn. Small birds were flittering in and out of the narrow gaps in the roof at the far end, chirping softly to one another, dancing in the air almost. His mind was in turmoil and his head was aching furiously, but the sight of the birds and their happy little sounds began to soothe him.

Memories continued to trickle back. Of a younger Marina, her face contorted with anger. So many quarrels. Cheating, too. With other men. Taking money from the business. Marina doing what she’d accused him of.

Was she really still his wife? How could he have stayed married to a woman like that?

Surely they must be divorced? But she hadn’t said that, and however hard he tried, the facts wouldn’t fall into place.

Something else slipped into his mind. Memories of their sons. Two sons. Grown up now. Living their own lives. Curtis . . . tall, talking fast and gesticulating, his eyes alight. Lennox, shortened to Lex, to his mother’s disgust. A quieter young man, more like his father in nature.

Chad decided to go on line and find out about himself, then see if he could contact his sons. Surely they’d be on one of the social web sites? Everyone else their age seemed to be there, hanging out their lives for the world to see.

What had their mother told them about him? Did they even know he was missing or had she given them some excuse to explain his absence?

His mind was jumping about, not functioning properly. Come to think of it, Chad himself would have a presence on line, surely?

And the business she’d talked about. What sort of business was it? She hadn’t said, and he’d been in too much distress to answer. He was still not in a condition to pursue the point, because his head was throbbing painfully. What he needed was a rest and some quiet time.

He couldn’t decide what to do next until he had more information and could think clearly.

When he went back to the flat, he found that the others were also tired and not feeling like doing much. Rachel wanted to watch a programme on TV. Oliver wanted to nip across to see one of his friends who lived nearby.

When he’d left, Emily looked across at Chad. ‘You all right?’

‘Yes. Only I’m not feeling very sociable. I need to move about . . . think . . . be quiet.’

‘There’s plenty of room here for you to do that. I hope it helps.’

What helped immediately was the easy way she’d accepted his needs and let him follow them.

So Chad spent the evening wandering round the house, moving mainly from the bar to the old barn, letting the memories trickle back as he walked. It seemed to help to walk – or was he imagining that?

When it came time to go to bed, he returned to the flat, to find that Emily had gone to bed half an hour ago, and since the light in the bedroom was out, he assumed she was asleep.

Rachel was still sitting there.

‘I didn’t want to leave her on her own. I’m going up to read in bed now that you’re here to keep an eye on her, Chad.’

‘Oliver not back?’

‘No, not yet.’

So Chad lay down on the mattress again and left Emily in peace. He felt drained and weary, needed to rest.

If he could fall asleep.

If he could stop worrying about his wife . . . who might not be his wife now . . . who didn’t feel like his wife . . .

Morning was a long time coming. The blackness eventually became charcoal, then grey. The greyness grew slowly lighter, and the room slowly filled with bright light that promised a sunny day.

And the central memories he desperately needed were still eluding him. What was his business? Why was Marina trying to muscle in on it? Where were his sons?

Chad ate a quick breakfast with the others, then said he wanted to check something in the old barn. He looked at Emily. ‘Do you have a minute or two?’

‘Yes, of course.’ She walked with him and when he took her hand, she felt a warmth that was far more than the touch of his skin; a closeness of the heart.

The old barn seemed filled with sunshine this morning, beams of light slanting down, small birds flying about at the far end, dust motes dancing in the air.

‘I haven’t got enough memories back yet to know where I stand,’ he said abruptly. ‘But I know one thing instinctively. I’m not still with her.’

‘Good.’

‘So I want to make it clear to you that I want to be with you. Long term. Whatever we have to go through to get there.’

A sigh of relief escaped her. ‘I want that too.’

‘You’ve never married?’

‘No.’

‘Are you against it or will you consider marrying me?’

The light seemed to glow around them as he spoke.

She had no hesitation with this man. ‘I’d love to marry you, Chad.’ She put her arms round his neck, kissing him, melting into his embrace as he kissed her back, framing his face with her hands.

As he pulled away, he touched her cheek gently, then brushed her hair back behind her ear. ‘Good. We’ll get through this mess somehow and then we’ll decide what to do with our lives.’

‘Sounds a good plan to me.’ She glanced at her watch. ‘I think I’ll leave you in peace for a while, though, if you don’t mind. I need to go on line. I’m behind with everything in cyberland.’

‘May I borrow your computer later and go hunting for myself on line?’

‘Of course. You don’t want me to try?’

‘No. I’d rather do it myself.’

Oliver watched Chad and Emily leave the flat, exchanged knowing smiles with Rachel then went back to his toast and honey.

‘I think they’re good for one another,’ she said. ‘I envy them.’

‘So do I.’ He started fiddling with the crumbs on his plate. ‘I’m not good at making important decisions quickly.’

‘I’m not either. At least you were happily married. I wasn’t. So take your time. I’ll need to do the same.’

‘Thank you for being so understanding.’

They hadn’t said anything important, yet Oliver felt they’d said everything.

When they’d finished eating, Toby again got up and cleared the table without being asked, then Oliver explained to him that he’d arranged a meeting with Kevin at eleven o’clock.

‘I don’t want to.’

‘You have to.’

Toby moved towards the door.

‘You mustn’t run away. Not this time.’

‘I want Chad. I want him to come too.’

Oliver looked at Rachel. ‘Stay with Emily and don’t open the door to anyone till we get back.’

‘No, Daddy!’

‘I have no desire whatsoever to be a father figure to you.’ He was delighted to see her cheeks go pink.

She changed the subject hastily. ‘I wonder what Emily and Chad are talking about. I know what I’m hoping for. Those two belong together. Anyone can see that.’

‘It can happen very quickly. Meeting someone, liking them in a special way.’

Chad stayed in the barn, letting the peace he always felt there soothe him. When he heard the sound of footsteps, he wondered if Emily had returned, but it was Toby, hesitating by the door, looking worried. ‘Do come in. Is something wrong?’

Toby stopped a few feet away from him, surprising him by saying, ‘You’re feeling sad. I can tell.’

‘Yes. I am a little. I’ve forgotten who I am. I’m starting to remember. But it’s hard.’ Images were still clicking into place in his mind, such a random selection. It was hard to get to grips with the present when the past kept jerking at his attention in a haphazard way.

‘I’m sorry you’re sad.’

‘Thank you. Can’t be helped.’

Toby rocked from side to side, then said in a rush, ‘Oliver says Kevin is coming. I have to speak to him. I don’t want to. Don’t want.’

‘Kevin’s your social worker. He needs to make sure you’re all right.’