A Place of Hope (14 page)

Emily could imagine sitting reading here but would like a seating arrangement that welcomed friends – and definitely fewer ornaments, if any. ‘She had lots of books. I like that.’

‘This is only a small proportion. There are bookshelves upstairs as well as in the rear bar. You could set up a second-hand bookshop with what she’s left you.’

‘I shall enjoy reading them.’

‘You have quite a few books too, if I remember correctly.’

‘Yes. A lifelong passion, especially speculative fiction. I enjoy reading authors’ guesses about what the future might be like, though they seem to have got very gloomy lately. I don’t think that sort of dystopian image reflects the human soul.’

She moved across to another door to find a good sized bedroom with a wet room leading off it. A kitchen lay at the rear of the sitting room, open plan, with enough space for a small table at one end. The rooms were all spacious and when she pulled back the curtains, she found that the windows in the living area and bedroom looked out on to the road, giving her sweeping views of the moors, while the kitchen looked out on to a large courtyard with empty pots that would look lovely filled with plants.

She could live very happily here, she knew.
Thank you, Cousin Penelope!
I’ll look after your house. I think you were right. It does feel like a place of hope.

At the rear of the kitchen was a utility area with a small, square window and a door leading to the courtyard. She tried to open it, but couldn’t find the key. ‘Didn’t Penelope use this door, Oliver?’

He came to join her, frowning. ‘Yes, of course she did. I’ve seen her sitting on that wooden bench in the afternoon sun many a time, reading or simply enjoying the warmth. Before she grew so frail, she used to keep those pots filled with flowers because this area is quite a sun trap.’

He checked around the inside of the door. ‘Where’s the key gone? Towards the end, I used to come here every few days to check she was all right, and Linda from Minkybridge came in to help with the housework and do Penelope’s shopping. It might be a good idea to ask Linda to help you with the housework as well. You can well afford it and I know she needs the money. There’s not much employment nearby.’

‘That sounds a great idea to me. I’m not at all fond of housework.’

Oliver took out his notebook, mouthing the words aloud as he wrote, ‘Contact Linda. Key to flat’s back door. There should be a spare at the office. There’s a whole bunch of them there. Surely she kept spares here, though?’

He looked at his watch. ‘We probably ought to speed up this first tour and make sure we find Chad somewhere to sleep tonight. I’m assuming you’ll sleep in the flat, Emily? We only need to put some clean sheets on the bed. Linda stripped it and washed everything after Penelope died. We can go through the rest of the house in detail when we get back from our shopping trip tomorrow.’

He waited, looking at her. ‘You all right about this?’

‘Oh, yes. I’m sure I’ll be very comfortable here.’

‘Let’s go and check the other bedrooms upstairs for your friends.’

‘Isn’t there anywhere Chad could sleep downstairs? I’d rather have someone within earshot. It’s a big house and I’m still nervous about George coming after me.’

‘Surely he won’t do that?’ Oliver stared at her in shock. ‘It’d be a crime.’

‘I wouldn’t put anything past my dear nephew when he scents money. If he could have kept me locked in that unit or one like it for the rest of my life, he would clearly have done so without hesitation.’ She turned to Chad. ‘Is it OK if we try to find you somewhere downstairs to sleep, somewhere near me?’

‘I’ll be happy anywhere. And if you’re nervous, I should definitely sleep nearby.’

‘Thank you.’

‘There’s Rachel to think of, too,’ Oliver reminded them. ‘Anyway, let me show you the upstairs before we decide.’

They went quickly through several bedrooms. They smelled of dust and disuse, with heavy old wardrobes and chests of drawers, standing sentinel round the edges of each room. There was only one bathroom to serve them all. There were clean sheets piled neatly in a linen cupboard on the landing, but the top ones looked dusty too, as if they hadn’t been used for ages.

Oliver indicated another set of stairs, much narrower. ‘That leads up to the attics.’

Emily stopped at the bottom of them, feeling limp with tiredness. ‘I’ll wait till tomorrow to explore up there, if you don’t mind. Is it just attics not rooms?’

‘It’s both. There are quite a few rooms, smallish, for the staff probably. The open area is piled with junk that’s been dumped there over the years.’

When they went downstairs, she linked her arm in Chad’s. ‘Where are we going to put you?’

‘We can bring a mattress down and I’ll sleep in the bar.’

‘Are you sure?’

‘I’m used to roughing it. I have vague memories of camping out. With children.’ He stopped to stare at her. They both knew the implications of that. He must have been married, perhaps still was.

She didn’t comment. But if he had a wife, why had she not been searching for him? ‘One day you may even have the whole picture, or at least enough of it to see what to do with your life more clearly.’

Chad smiled at her. ‘You’re very positive. That helps.’

It was another of those moments where she felt so close to him, she wanted to touch him, and lean against his quiet strength. He had a way of smiling at her that made her feel . . . warm and loved.

Then she remembered Oliver, standing watching them, and felt a little flustered, as if she’d been caught with her clothes off.

Chad turned back towards the nearest bedroom. ‘I’ll get a mattress.’

‘Let Oliver do that. You’ve pushed yourself far enough for one day.’

‘I hate being dependent on others.’

‘At one time you were told you’d never walk properly again. Be grateful for the excellent progress you’re making.’

Oliver brought down a single mattress. ‘I don’t think you’ll miss having a bed base. This is well sprung and seems unused, brand new even. There’s Rachel still to come, though. We should have chosen a room for her and opened the window to air it.’

‘We’ll let her decide which room she wants. She always knows her own mind. I’d better go and switch that old fridge on now to make sure it works. We don’t want our milk to go off, though it isn’t the warmest of days, considering it’s nearly summer.’

‘I’ll start bringing the rest of your things in from the car, then,’ Oliver said. ‘No, leave that to me. I think you and Chad should have a rest. You’re both looking pale and weary.’

His words reminded her of a poem and as he went out, she murmured the words:

Chad continued it for her:

‘
La Belle Dame Sans Merci
,’ they chorused and laughed.

‘Did you have to learn it at school, too?’ she asked.

‘That and a dozen other poems. It took me years to get over what Mr Robinson did to poetry.’ He stopped, and shook his head sadly. ‘There. That’s a name from the past, but not one that will lead me anywhere, unless I remember the school’s name as well.’ As she opened her mouth to speak, he held up one hand. ‘I know, I know. I should be grateful that I’m remembering anything. But they’re such tiny pieces of the jigsaw puzzle of my life that they don’t help much. I still don’t even know my own name for sure. That is utterly galling.’

Oliver walked in and out, dumping the luggage and bundles in the front bar until the car was cleared. ‘This is the last thing. I thought I’d go down to my house now and get you a few spare clothes, Chad.’

‘That’s very kind. Are you sure you don’t mind?’

‘It’s my pleasure. I have too much stuff anyway. We can buy you some things of your own tomorrow, and don’t forget I have an appointment booked for you both with Dr Allerton first thing tomorrow morning. She’s coming into the surgery on a Sunday specially, to oblige me. Seven thirty for Emily, eight o’clock for Chad. Can you be up in time to get there? Good. I’ll pick you up at ten past seven.’

‘Not a problem for me,’ Emily said. ‘I’m an early bird.’

‘I think I am too.’ Chad frowned. ‘Well, if I wasn’t before, I am now.’

‘You’ll like Jean Allerton,’ Oliver said confidently. ‘She’s one of the best GPs I’ve ever met. She was wonderful with my wife during that final year.’ He sighed and stood still for a minute, his eyes unfocused, then straightened up. ‘I’ll only be gone an hour or so, or a bit longer if I nip into the office and get hold of the spare keys for the house. Will you be all right?’

‘Of course we will.’

When he’d driven off, Emily looked at Chad. ‘I know we ought to rest, but I’d like to explore the ground floor more carefully. I don’t know about you. Not only am I curious to see my inheritance, but I need to feel secure. I don’t want an intruder creeping up on me.’

‘I feel exactly the same. Most of all, I never want to be shut away and under someone else’s control again.’

She gave in to temptation and linked her arm in his again, standing close.

He didn’t say anything. Neither did she. There was no need. They got on so well.

When they set off again, they walked along the rear bar, to find a door leading to a maze of storerooms and an old-fashioned commercial kitchen. It had an outer door at the side of the house, but once again, there seemed no way of opening it.

‘Was this Penelope of yours paranoid about locking herself in?’ Chad wondered aloud.

‘She must have been if she didn’t even leave the keys in the locks. Perhaps she didn’t visit the other parts of the house very often.’ Emily stood back, brushing a cobweb off her sweater. ‘Well, there’s no way we can get out to the back or side today and I’m tired. I don’t feel like walking right round the house to view the outside.’

‘I’m fading rapidly now.’

‘I shouldn’t even have brought you this far. Let’s go back to the flat and rest.’

It was peaceful sitting together, sipping tea slowly, eating a biscuit or two, looking out at the moors and watching vehicles pass on the road that led up and across to Yorkshire. By some trick of acoustics, the sound of their engines was nothing but a faint buzz, with a slightly louder sound coming from the big trucks that chugged more slowly up the hill.

‘I’m glad I have somewhere to stay,’ he said. ‘I don’t know what I’d have done without you. Joined the homeless on the streets, I suppose. Anything would have been better than staying in that place.’

‘I’m not only glad to have someone around, I’m glad it’s you.’ She hesitated then shared her thoughts with him. ‘I don’t know . . . I feel as if we’re not done with this business yet. Even though I don’t see what George can do to me, I know how tenacious he is. Even as a child, he always wanted other children’s toys – and got them too, more often than not. Or broke them.’

‘My son was always—’ Chad broke off in shock. ‘The camping image was right. I have a son . . . No, two sons. They’re called—’ He frowned, closing his eyes, desperately trying to hold on to the memory.

Oh, she felt for him, she really did.

He groaned. ‘It’s no good. I can’t remember their names. Only their faces.’

‘But remembering them at all is another step forward.’

‘Yes, but . . .’ He looked at her, just looked.

He was an attractive man. Very. Naturally a man like him would be married, she thought. Even George had got married and he wasn’t at all attractive.

Only . . . where was Chad’s wife?

Once again, Emily had been attracted to a man she couldn’t have. She would never break up a marriage . . . Unless he was divorced.

He spoke his thoughts aloud. ‘If I have a wife, why hasn’t she been searching for me? Why hasn’t she listed me as a missing person?’

‘I can’t imagine.’

‘I don’t feel as if I have a wife,’ he offered.

‘But you must have had one at some time.’

‘I don’t get a good feeling when I think about that.’

She hated the thought of him going back to another woman. Hated it! From now on, she must control her emotions and keep in mind that when all the fuss had settled down, she’d very likely be left here alone. Well, she’d been alone for a while now, in that sense, knew how to live a perfectly satisfactory single life.

But this time, she’d been hoping . . .

Sometimes she wondered what was wrong with her. Why hadn’t she ever been able to find a life partner?

Chad gave a little shake of the head, as if dismissing some unhappy thoughts, and turned back to his mug of tea, clutching it tightly and staring down into it. ‘We shall just have to wait and see,’ he said at last. ‘And hope for the best.’

She concentrated on her own mug. She’d wait, yes. And hope. But not hope for too much. Didn’t dare.

Then she realized she’d used that word again. Hope. Was there hope for them? Please let there be.

Rachel had an easy drive up to Lancashire. No traffic jams, one quick stop for refreshments, and on she went, singing along to the radio when a song came on that she liked, wincing when the broadcast was interrupted for hurtfully loud traffic announcements.

It felt good to be going away somewhere, whatever the reason. She’d been a bit down in the dumps since her son and his family left for Australia, even though he’d tried to persuade her to follow them later. That had posed, and still did pose, a dreadful dilemma. She didn’t want to leave England and live so far away from all she knew, but oh, she didn’t want to be parted from Tim and his wife Abbie, let alone little Sophie. She missed her granddaughter so much!

People got excited about emigrating, but what about the families that were broken up by it, the ones who were left behind?

She didn’t know why she was dwelling on this. Hadn’t she promised herself to accept Tim’s choice? She would, after all, be able to visit them in Australia. One day. If she saved hard. Or got a part-time job. She’d been retrenched and tossed into early retirement unexpectedly. The money she’d received, and the reduced superannuation because she’d worked for fewer years than she expected, wouldn’t cover expensive trips to the other side of the world.