A Path Toward Love (39 page)

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Authors: Cara Lynn James

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BOOK: A Path Toward Love
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K
atherine rowed until her arms ached. Blisters rubbed between her fingers, but she kept pulling back on the oars with all the strength she had. Slowly the stress from facing Harriet eased.

Certainly Andrew would advise her about how to handle Harriet. At least he understood her predicament, when no one else did. Papa would take care of the problem in a flash and she'd never have to give Harriet another thought, but she feared he'd somehow damage her and her son in the process. None of this was Zeke's fault, and he shouldn't have to pay the price for his parents' sins. The turmoil inside her didn't reflect her charitable impulse, but she'd ignore her roiling feelings in favor of a clear conscience. She had to remember she was doing the right thing and not waver.

She found Andrew awaiting her on the pier. The knots in her heart tightened.
What does this mean, Lord? Are You trying to tell me something? Should I rely on him? He's always here when I need him
. Her head hurt from too much thinking, and her heart was crushed from colliding emotions. Yet she had to deal with this situation with Harriet, the last troubled remnant from her marriage. And then she'd be free from her past.

Andrew paced the pier as she rowed toward shore and waved. When she beached the rowboat on the rocky soil beside the dock, he rushed to help her. He pulled the craft to shore. His face looked grim, his blond hair askew. During the last few weeks he'd lost his calm, quiet demeanor and that interesting hint of sardonic amusement only somewhat concealed behind his self-assured mask. He ran his fingers through his hair, messing it up even more.

Helping her up to the pier, he asked, “Tell me, what did Harriet say? Does she still want money? Did you agree on an amount?”

Katherine gave a short, dry laugh. “She wants two thousand dollars. Of course I didn't agree to that. I said I had to speak to my attorney.”

“Good. Let's take a walk, so we won't be disturbed.” Glancing sideways, his smile looked crooked.

They settled onto a path that led through a thick stand of trees, affording some privacy. The light scent of Andrew's aftershave distracted her for a moment.

“Katherine, tell me—where did you envision finding any funds at all to give Miss Roles?”

Desperate, wild thoughts immediately brought her to her courtship. Randy had enough in his own right for the two of them to live comfortably. When they married, both sets of joyous and relieved parents would contribute generously to the coffers. Was God telling her to cease her resistance and find solace in financial relief, if not love?

“It will leave me with precious little, but I could give her five hundred dollars now. After the harvest, I could contribute more.”

“It sounds like your harvest is getting parsed into more and more coffers,” he said, giving her a rueful smile. “But five hundred would definitely keep the wolves at bay for a time. And I wouldn't offer her more than one thousand from the harvest. It's more than enough to bring up the child. Not in grand style, for certain. But not in poverty either.”

She considered that. “I appreciate your advice, Andrew. But I don't want to cheat on my charity,” she said. “Let's offer her five hundred now, one thousand come harvest, and another five hundred when he graduates high school. It will be meeting her wishes, in a way, but will encourage the boy to make something of himself.”

He nodded, his eyes full of admiration. “That's very generous of you. I'll draw up an agreement—and stipulate that she must not request any more money from you in the future. She must leave you be, or she will not see the final payment upon Zeke's graduation.”

She gave a grim smile. “I'm looking forward to it being done.”

He nodded as if he understood perfectly.

“Andrew, please promise me you won't tell my father about these arrangements. I've decided what to do and I don't want my parents to consider it their obligation to counsel me. You know how distressed they get when I don't take their advice. This is a private matter, so there's no need for them to be involved.”

“I wasn't planning on telling them anything. That's up to you, not me. When will you meet with Harriet again?” he asked.

“Tomorrow morning. I'll dash into town to make a withdrawal from the bank.”

“Good. I'll draw up the agreement later this afternoon.” He looked over his shoulder.

“Maybe we ought to go back. The mothers are probably looking for you.”

“Yes, indeed. They like to keep me in their sights. Perhaps I should go alone, so no one will see us together. There's no point in asking for trouble. Thank you for everything, Andrew.”

He gave a surprisingly curt nod. He looked as if he wanted to say something but couldn't find the right words. She waited for a moment.

“Katherine, there's something important I want to ask you.” He sounded hesitant. “I should've spoken to you before, but I've hesitated because I don't want to disrupt your life.”

“Yes?” She smiled, alternately wanting to hear the words she knew he'd wanted to say for a long time, but then knowing those words should be left unsaid. At the muffled sound of footsteps on the path, she glanced over her shoulder. “Oh no, Mama's coming and she looks out of sorts. Can our talk wait until later?”

“Of course. But look for me as soon as you can escape.” He turned and strode down the trail in the opposite direction of her mother.

She closed her eyes to block out the confrontation ahead, if only for a moment.

When Mama caught up to her, she peered at her through squinted eyes. “Did I see you here with Andrew?”

“For a moment,” Katherine said. “But believe me, we're both very clear about your feelings about us being together. So it was only for a moment.”

“Hmph. No need to be haughty with me, young lady. Do keep in mind that we have his best interests at heart too. Leading him on shall only hurt him, in time, as well as your courtship with Randy. Please return with me. Papa and I have something to say to you.” Wincing, Katherine dutifully followed her mother. She lagged a few paces behind her as they silently made their way through the woods to the lodge, and then the library.

They found Papa pacing in front of the screened windows. The plaid curtains fluttered in the mild breeze and lifted the fronds of the palms set on a nearby table. Mama crossed her arms over her chest.

Katherine braced herself. “What is it, Papa?”

His brows puckered in a frown and he glanced toward Mama. He kept his voice low.

“Now, don't get angry, princess. Randy told us about Charles's son and how the mistress wants money.”

The roar in Katherine's ear nearly blocked her father's words.

“Don't blame Randy. He was reluctant to tell us,” Mama said. “But he correctly decided he had a duty to explain. He's convinced you should not give money to—that woman, even for the boy's sake. He is her responsibility, certainly not yours. You were the victim in that shameful marriage.”

They were right about Charles, but Mama didn't have cause to rub salt in that old, deep wound.

Mama persisted, “You must heed our judgment, Katherine. It should be clear to you that you're prone to making dreadful choices. We know what's best, so please be wise and follow our advice.”

Katherine sniffed back tears of fury and betrayal and clenched her jaw. She blamed herself for the entire mess, but right now she needed support, not condemnation. “Giving the woman something for Charles's son is the Christian way. I'd be committing a sin if I refused her when she's in such need, no matter how it chafes.”

Mama's mouth tightened in a grimace. “Where do you pick up such odd notions? Aunt Letty? I understand she's given nearly all her money away to foreign missions. She's sweet, but rather silly. I'm afraid she's a bad influence.”

“No, I haven't spoken to her about this. But if I do, I'm sure she'll agree with me.”

Mama groaned. “My point exactly. You are both so susceptible to those who prey on a kind heart.” Then she stared at Katherine. “You are not to give that woman one cent. Do you understand?”

“I hear you. May I leave now, Papa?”

“In a moment. I want you to know we understand you're just trying to be generous and sympathetic. That's a wonderful trait, princess. But you mustn't give in to the woman or she'll keep demanding more.”

Katherine stayed silent and looked down at the patterns of the Turkish carpet. If she explained how Andrew had solved that problem, they'd both get angry with him for interfering with family concerns.

With a weary sigh, Papa dismissed her. Before Mama could continue, Katherine rushed out of the room. There was one person she wanted to see. Randy.

She found him alone on the side porch strumming his mandolin and singing softly. “Katherine, what a pleasure to see you.” He rose, but she waved him to his seat.

“I have a bone to pick with you.”

A frown furrowed his brow. “What have I done to upset you?”

“You told my parents about Charles's mistress and their son. I asked you not to. I
trusted
you, Randy.”

“Oh, that. I apologize for embarrassing you. But I thought they ought to know. I believe I did the right thing. Paying anything to that woman is ridiculous.”

“You betrayed me, Randy. You had no right to tell my parents what I told you in confidence.”

“If I'm to be your husband, I have every right to protect your interests.”

She stared back at him, thinking how much she loathed those words.
If I'm to be your husband .
. . Then she turned on her heel and fled before she said something she just might regret.

Andrew returned to his bedroom and drew up an agreement between Katherine and Harriet. Katherine might object to him tagging along, but this time he'd try to convince her. He was afraid the woman might object to the more-than-generous terms. The trick was going with her, without being seen.

All during dinner he tried to catch her attention, but she never glanced his way. Finally after the ladies and gentlemen joined together in the recreation hall, he signaled her with one raised eyebrow. She sidestepped toward him and he passed by her to retrieve a Ping-Pong paddle, thankful for the invitation to a game by Mr. Lessman.

Under his breath he murmured, “If you can get away, meet me in the library in thirty minutes.”

She gave a barely perceptible nod as she strolled off to join a group of women sitting by the fireplace gossiping. He had no trouble escaping the crowd, but he suspected Katherine might. Once in the library, with the agreement hidden in his satchel, he waited for her, anxiety mounting with every second she didn't appear. When the clock struck the half hour, fifteen minutes after he asked to meet with her, he wondered if she'd be able to come. But eventually she slipped through the door of the dimly lit room and rushed to his side, breathing heavily.

Her hand pushed against the bodice of her blue-gray silk gown. “Please pardon me for arriving so late. It couldn't be helped. Mrs. Porter kept chattering and wouldn't let me go. And Mama follows me around with those sharp eyes of hers. I only have a moment.”

He handed her the agreement. “First of all, take this, read it over, and then put it in your cabin.”

She scanned the paper and nodded. “Thank you, Andrew.”

“You're most welcome. But before you leave, I'd like to say I'm planning to go with you tomorrow. You might find Harriet more difficult than you expect. I want to be available if I'm needed. Don't say no, Katherine. I insist on coming. I promise I'll stay out of your way. I won't go inside the inn while you're speaking to Harriet. You can simply fetch me if you're in need.”

She smiled and pressed his hand. “That's very kind of you, but Papa won't allow it when you're supposed to be working. I can handle this myself. Please don't worry about me.” Katherine shook her head. “We can't both be gone at the same time without drawing attention to ourselves. Mama is keeping such close tabs on me—on both of us—I don't want to chance it. I don't wish to create a scene.” She glanced toward the door, her brows drawn together. “I must be going.” Grasping his hand, she squeezed it tightly.

But he held on when she tried to leave. She paused, confused, and then turned to him, a question in her beautiful eyes.

“Wait, just a moment. I have something to say, and it can't wait any longer.”

“All right,” she said slowly.

He brought his other hand up to cover hers. “Katherine, I'm in love with you. I think I've always been in love with you. But since we reunited”—he shook his head—“it's unavoidable. I love you. And I believe you love me.”

Her forehead creased. “I love you too,” she whispered, seeming dazed. “But it will come to nothing, so we shouldn't speak of it. I'm so sorry, Andrew. I wish things were different, but they aren't. We have to be realistic.”

He stared at her. He loved her and she loved him, and yet they were to turn away? The combined frustration of the last month and a half pounded in his head. “No, Katherine! We can overcome any barrier, as long as we tackle it together. Katherine, listen to me. I love you with all my being and I want to be with you. Please. Marry me.” His heartbeat thundered in his ears as he watched her expression change from fleeing joy to desolation.

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