A Part of Me (23 page)

‘Hey,’ I managed feebly, maintaining a safe breath distance. ‘What are you doing here?’

‘He could ask you the same thing, but we won’t go into that,’ my mother chimed in as Lily fished in the biscuit jar.

‘Lils wanted to say thanks. For the other night.’ He turned to check Lily over the other side of the island with Mum. ‘Sorry, I’m Rohan. I don’t think I said that, at the door.’ He smiled, holding out a hand for my mother. The brilliance of Rohan’s smile affected her instantly, a blush rising in her cheeks.

‘I thought so. I’ve heard a lot about you, Mr Bywater.
And who’s this?’ she asked, smuggling Lily another biscuit.

‘This is my daughter, Lily,’ he said, pride rising in him.

I caught sight of the stack of creepy profile pictures between them. Mum’s eyes followed mine. She was about as subtle as an ocean liner, clumsily gathering them together as Rohan watched. He turned back to catch me bulging eyes at my mother.

I smiled meekly. ‘How did you know I was—’

‘Carter and Phil.’ He smiled cautiously.

‘You saw them last night?’ I asked.

‘This morning. Phil stayed over in the boathouse.’

‘She did?’

‘Yeah, they’ve been … getting along.’

‘Oh,’ I exclaimed, still trying to get my head around it.

‘Like a moth to a flame.’ Rohan smiled.

‘Poor Carter,’ I acknowledged.

‘I was talking about Phil. Carter’s got skills, you know.’

‘Well, I think he’s a splendid chap,’ Mum added.

Rohan idly ran his hand through his choppy dark layers. ‘We have something for you,’ he said, turning for the box behind him. ‘Well, Lils picked it out. To say thanks … for coming to our rescue the other night.’ He smiled crookedly and let his hand run over to the back of his neck. ‘I know it’s not what you might have chosen, but when we went for Lil’s car seat, we grabbed a few other things and she said you’d like this one.’

Lily, her understandable caution of me allayed with a
chocolate bourbon, toddled round to take the box from her father. She lifted the flaps and pulled out a shiny pink bike helmet.

‘Oh! How lovely!’ Mum said, stuffing the dating profiles into one of the drawers.

‘Do you want to come for a ride with us today, Amy?’ Lily asked, holding up the helmet for me.

I tucked clumps of matted hair behind my ears. ‘Wow, Lily. Is this for me?’ She bobbed her head, her own helmet falling forward on her. ‘Thank you, Lily. This is really kind of you.’

‘Daddy said you might come if you have a hat for your bike,’ she said.

Rohan laughed uneasily. ‘It’s a beautiful day out there. We were wondering if you’d like to take a ride with us along the footpaths around Briddleton?’

‘You’ve cycled here? With Lily?’

‘I bought her a kid seat. It’s fixed to Cart’s mountain bike. It’s pretty good, actually, but er … I’m a bit nervy in case I fall off or something.’

Small electrical impulses were shorting across my body. Maybe my systems were slowly rebooting. ‘I’ve seen what you do on a bike upside down mid-air. I think you’ll be okay on a cycle path.’ I smiled.

His eyes narrowed a little. ‘Thought maybe you could be our wing man?’

Mum was pretending to busy herself over on the back counter. ‘I, er …’ I looked down at the skirt and top combo
I was still in. ‘I haven’t showered yet, and … I don’t actually think I have anything to change into.’ I grimaced.

‘You do,’ came my mother’s chirpy voice. ‘You left a pair of jeans here last time you stayed, and you can borrow one of my T-shirts.’ I tried not to look at Rohan.

‘I thought you wanted me to help at the fete, Mum?’

‘Well, why don’t you all come?’ Mum asked, clasping her hands together. ‘There’ll be plenty for little Lily, here. Candy floss and a bouncy castle.’

Lily’s ears pricked. She turned wide eyes at her father.

‘Sounds great to me. But is it far?’

‘No! If you’re cycling, it’s only about ten or fifteen minutes from here. Amy will show you, won’t you, sweetheart?’

‘But I don’t have a bike!’ I wasn’t even sure I could still ride one.

Mum skipped around the unit. ‘I have a bike.’

‘You have a bike? Here?’ I asked dubiously. I’d never seen my mum on a bike in her life.

‘Parisian Day. It was a WI thing, we all cycled down to Jackson’s Park for a picnic and a few publicity photos for the Tweeter page Karen wants to set up.’

Tweeter?

‘Do you mean
Twitter
, Mum?’ I smiled.

She batted her hand at me. ‘Tweeter, Twitter – what’s the difference? Anyway, we didn’t all go. There were a couple of “clicky hips” who opted out, not everyone was game. But I managed to get myself a bike for ten pounds
on eBay,’ she said flamboyantly. ‘It’s got a basket on the front, which I’m sure you’ll hate, Amy, but it’ll give you somewhere to keep your Alka-Seltzers.’ She smiled, pushing rogue ringlets from over her eyes.

Rohan had dipped his chin, smiling to himself. ‘Does it work? I could take a look at it,’ he offered, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

‘Amy’s brother put two new wheels on it for me. Gave me awful saddle sore but it goes a treat.’

Mum was still looking at Rohan, studying him. His unusual eyes, the perfect line of his profile. She was thinking what I’d been trying not to. That he was probably the most beautiful man that had ever been in this house.

‘Should I have a quick shower, then?’ I asked quietly, seeing as Mum had it all worked out. Rohan’s face softened, his shoulders relaxing a little.

As if I was going to say no.

E
ARLESWICKE COMMUNITY CENTRE
was almost unrecognisable adorned with paper streamers and candy-stripe gazebos, the smell of sugary treats competing on the wind with barbecued meats and real ale. Children were darting haphazardly between the adults and various stalls while some of their more obedient counterparts danced around a maypole to the soundtrack of the afternoon, meted out on an inexhaustible accordion by a chap in Morris dancing get-up.

The journey here had started off a little ropey. My balance wasn’t overly reliable at first and Mum had neglected to tell me that the left brake was defunct. When we’d cycled past the hedgerows along the canal footpath I’d definitely swallowed something gnat-like, but otherwise the warm sunshine and fresh air had been just the remedy.

‘So, your mum and her friends have organised all this to raise funds?’ Rohan asked, leaning the bikes against the railings beside the coconut shy. He reached down to unclip Lily’s helmet for her, a flop of blonde hair falling
down her back. I’d watched her throughout the ride here, sure that she might fall from her perch, completely at a loss as to what I’d be able to do about it if she did. Thankfully, other than a constant stream of Rohan’s body fragrance, the ride had been fairly smooth.

‘Er, not funds so much as awareness, I think. This is the only real social hub in Earleswicke. They just don’t want it to slip away without doing what they can.’

Rohan walked over to me and reached up to the clasp beneath my chin. My hair had mostly dried in the breeze but there was nothing I could do about the curl now. He lifted my helmet away too, eyes resting on mine. I began babbling. ‘The council have said that if the locals can get a thousand signatures on this e-petition they’ve set up, to keep the community centre open, the council will take it on board and have a rethink.’

Rohan gently placed my helmet in the basket of my bike. He looked at the merriment taking place across the grounds of the community centre.

‘There are a few here. That’s good.’

I steadied myself after my momentary excitement. ‘Uhuh. I just hope they all sign up.’ I smiled, watching my mum stride formidably from one person to the next with her clipboard. Lily saw the bouncy castle, squealed and made a dart across the grass beneath the canopy of fluttering bunting. Rohan skipped to catch her up while Mum clocked Lily and Rohan ahead of me and began walking over to the bouncy castle. She was already
thrusting her clipboard at him when I reached them, Lily sat yanking at her shoes at the foot of the giant inflatable. I crouched beside her.

‘Here, sweetie. Let me undo that for you.’ I fiddled with the little denim strap where it fed into the buckle. ‘There you go.’ I paid the girl for Lily’s turn while Mum carried on accosting Rohan.

‘And you just put a link on the Tweeter page, and the other Tweeterers can send it out to their friends too?’ Mum was asking him.

‘Sure. And so your followers can pass it on to their followers, etc. Information moves at a ridiculous rate on sites like Twitter. You should get your friend to put your e-petition up there. It’s a good way of racking up a few extra names.’

Mum was nodding emphatically. ‘I’ll do that. Thank you, Rohan. We definitely need all the help we can get. Going door-to-door is a hassle and some of the women won’t go down certain streets on their own.’

Rohan looked around the events taking place in the field. Over by the food tent, a crowd of youths were hanging over their bikes, munching on burgers and other things I still couldn’t even think about.

‘What if they had chaperones?’ Rohan asked, turning back to Mum.

‘Chaperones?’

Rohan turned and looked over to the group of youths. I recognised Nathan instantly, the only kid the police had
caught that night in the mill. ‘Do you know those kids?’ Rohan asked my mum.

Mum took them all in as they larked about across the grass. ‘I know Nathan. He left us last year. Caspar, his younger brother, is still at Greenacres Primary.’

‘You know not to be put off by swagger and attitude, then? Leave it with me, Vivian.’ Rohan patted my mum on the arm as he passed her, and walked over the grass to join me at the bouncy castle. A few of the boys called over to him, Rohan throwing his hand in the air back at them.

‘Fans of yours?’ I said, feeding my hands into my back pockets.

‘They’re mostly good kids.’

‘You have a good way with them, Rohan.’

‘Yeah, well … they’re lads. They just need a nudge in the right direction.’

I shook my head lightly. ‘It’s not just because they’re lads. You’re great with Lily, too.’ His chest rose and fell as we watched her from the sideline, his expression warming and cooling with each of her giggles and near-tumbles.

‘You’re great with her,’ he said, tilting his head to me.

I could smell the scent of his skin again, reaching down into my lungs.

‘Hey, hey! Who’s this, son? It’s Aunty Amy!’ rumbled an excited voice behind us. Rohan looked back over his shoulder. I stole a few more seconds looking at him.

Samuel was tucking into a pink cloud of candy floss
bigger than his face, Guy clinging to a gourmet burger that required two hands to hold it together. He held it out to me. ‘Fancy a bite, sis? Mum said you were feeling delicate today?’ I ducked out of his way, unsure how far through my recovery I was. Rohan laughed to himself.

‘Rohan, this is my brother Guy. And this is Sam, his better-behaved son.’

Rohan held out a hand for Guy. ‘How’s it going?’ he said, shaking hands. Sam held his hand up to Rohan too. ‘Hey, buddy. Nice to meet you. That’s quite the sugar rush you’ve got there.’

‘Need our energy, don’t we, son? It’s the dads and boys obstacle race in five minutes. We want that trophy, don’t we, kid?’ Sam bobbed his head.

‘Dads and boys?’ Rohan asked as Lily ran over to him with her shoes. Rohan scooped her up. ‘Looks like I dodged that one.’

‘Don’t I know you, mate?’ my brother asked around another mouthful. ‘I’m sure I recognise you, where did you say you worked?’

‘He didn’t, Guy!’ I said waspishly, slipping Lily’s shoe back over her foot.

Rohan smiled. ‘I don’t think so, mate. I work from home.’

Someone on a loud speaker announced that all participants should begin making their way to the obstacle course. ‘Are you coming to watch
The Machine
go to work?’ Guy snorted, flexing his arms.

‘Will you come and watch us, Aunty Amy?’ Sam asked. ‘You have to throw a beanbag, carry a bucket of water without spilling any and then you have to put a hula hoop over your head.’

‘Sam, I would love to see your dad trying to get through a hula hoop after that burger.’ I smiled. ‘It’ll be a bit like a magic trick, won’t it?’

Rohan sat Lily up on his shoulders, leading us closer to the games track. I could see Mum cooing over Harry, strapped to Lauren’s chest. A little further up from them Nathan was stood comforting another little boy, dark hair past his ears. Guy took Sam over to register as entrants while Rohan led us over to the fence.

‘Hey,’ Rohan called to Nathan. ‘What’s up with your little friend?’

‘Oh, Caspar! Whatever is the matter?’ Mum said, following the line of the fence towards us.

‘He’s all right, Mrs Alwood,’ Nathan called. ‘He just wanted to go in the race but I’ve told him he can’t.’ Caspar didn’t look that much older than Sam, seven at most.

‘Why can’t he go in the race?’ I asked, bending down beside the little lad. He had muddy tear tracks down his cheeks. ‘Don’t cry, sweetie. You can race if you’d like.’

‘No he can’t. It’s for dads and boys and our dad’s at the pub. He only likes horse races.’ Mum’s lips pressed into a long resigned line.

I stood up beside her.

‘His father doesn’t even turn up to parents’ evening.
Caspar’s only here because Nathan’s looking after him,’ she whispered.

‘Men and boys! Final call for the obstacle race!’ bellowed the man with the speakerphone. Caspar looked utterly deflated.

‘Can’t he go in with Guy?’ I asked. ‘Or another adult?’

‘Men and boys?’ Rohan said, lifting Lily from his shoulders. ‘I’ll race with you, buddy.’ Caspar looked wide-eyed at Rohan. Rohan set his hand on Caspar’s shoulder. ‘But I have to tell you something before we go out there, my man,’ he said, his voice dropping to a whisper. ‘I’m
really
fast.’ The little boy looked mystified, so did Nathan and Mum. Rohan bent down and began unzipping his trouser leg, turning his combats into shorts. He shuffled free of the right leg, Caspar looking on, then he unzipped the left.

I heard a gasp as Rohan showed the mechanics of his prosthesis off. Mum was trying not to stare, Caspar and Nathan trying to drink in as much of the view as possible.

‘
Cool!’
Caspar exclaimed.

‘That is so awesome,’ Nathan added. Rohan began fiddling with the various metal components of his leg as if tapping at buttons we couldn’t see.

He looked up at Caspar, whose mouth still hung open.

‘Okay, I’ve turned the speed down. Transformers always beat humans, we need to give them a chance if we’re going to race, don’t we, buddy?’ he asked. Caspar
nodded, agog. ‘You ready then?’ Caspar nodded again, words evading him.

Mum was smiling goofily at me.

‘Will you watch Lily for me?’ Rohan asked.

‘Sure.’ I smiled, picking her up. I felt his hands slip either side of my body, one on my waist, the other on Lily. He leant in and pecked her on the cheek. His eyes lingered on us for a second, then his hands were gone.

Over the sounds of blood rushing through my ears, I could just hear Rohan making robotic noises for Caspar’s benefit.

*

It was all over in five minutes. The other dads had been distracted for some reason once Rohan and Caspar had joined the starting line. Guy had struggled with an
unfairly small
hula hoop, most of the kids were too busy pointing at Caspar’s partner and so the chocolate trophy was his.

It had been a good day. A day of lingering looks and light, almost imperceptible, touches, set to the melodious score of Lily’s infectious laughter. We were sitting slurping ice creams and cold cans of pop on the bank watching the dying activity of the fete fizzle out around us, Lily blowing bubbles with one of her million lucky dips.

‘We missed you last week,’ Rohan said, pondering the contents of his drinks can. ‘I thought I might have …
overstepped the mark, asking you to come over with the things for Lily.’

I balanced my wrists on my knees and looked across at him. Just thinking about him that night, fixing my earring, made my skin want to ripple with goose bumps. ‘Not at all.’ I smiled. ‘I really like spending time with you and Lily.’

He turned to face me.

‘I’m sorry to hear about Shin Splints. It’s just my opinion, but you were too good for him anyway,’ he said.

Something tightened in my chest. ‘Nobody’s perfect, I guess. Did Phil mention anything else?’ I asked gingerly. Might as well know now.

Rohan surveyed the scene of dismantlement before us.

‘She told me about the adoption, and the decision you made yesterday. Must’ve been rough,’ he conceded. Lily was blowing too hard, none of the bubbles were having a chance to form properly. I let out a long breath. ‘I didn’t realise you were trying for a family, Amy. I’m sorry it didn’t work out.’

I smiled and looked down at the grass between my legs.

‘Do you think you’ll try again?’

‘I don’t think so. I don’t think it’s meant to be.’ I smiled.

‘I thought the same thing,’ he said, nodding at Lily. ‘But paths change. Even when you don’t want them to, sometimes things just take you along a different course.’ He was examining his empty can again. ‘You know, when
we were kids, there was this girl who lived on my street, Cathy Brown – I was crazy about her.’

‘Cathy Brown?’ I said, arching my brows.

Rohan ducked his head, reading my thoughts. ‘She may not sound very hot now, but trust me, this girl had it all going on. Long brown legs, straight black hair down to her ass, the latest Walkman.’ I rolled my eyes. ‘Anyway, she was a stunner. But it didn’t matter what I did to get this girl’s attention, she wouldn’t even look my way.’

I turned my grin towards Lily, watching her successfully puff a plume of soapy bubbles into the evening haze.

‘Now, I hated school. I never went to a school I didn’t hate, and trust me, I moved to a lot of schools, but there was this end-of-term disco and I was desperate for Cathy Brown to be my woman.’

‘Your woman?’ I smiled. ‘How old were you?’

‘Thirteen.’ He grinned.

I started laughing. ‘Okay, so she’s thirteen.’

‘No, she was fourteen.’

‘Oh, an older woman.’

‘I was very mature,’ he said nonchalantly.

I was trying not to grin so much. ‘So … other than your
maturity
, how did you get her to go out with you?’

‘I didn’t. But I’ll get to that point. So Carter and I came up with a brilliant plan. Actually, it was originally Arthur’s idea, but we modified it – made it better. Art had told me how he’d got his wife to fall in love with him back in the day. Like Cathy Brown, Arthur’s girl had been
playing it cool with him, so to get her attention he’d tied a whole bunch of empty cans to the back of his bike and ridden up and down her street until she got sick of the racket.’

‘And then what? They fell in love right there on the pavement?’ Rohan held up a finger. He wasn’t finished yet.

‘Art was from another era, so I think flowers featured in there somewhere, a bit of wooing and a lot of handshaking with her father before anyone was falling in love with anyone else. Anyway, Cathy Brown …’

‘Ah yes, Cathy.’ I smiled.

‘So, Carter and I tie on the cans, Carter takes up position across the street from her house so he can see if she’s biting or not when I’m riding up and down past her front garden, or if her dad is going to come out and bust my ass for all the noise.’

‘You and Carter, aged thirteen? What could possibly go wrong?’ I teased. Lily ran up the bank and plonked down in the grass in front of me.

‘Hey, it worked. Kinda. So out comes Cathy Brown, in her little roller boots and this yappy little terrier rat dog she had, scurrying beside her down the road. She wasn’t really into the whole flower thing, so Carter and I had already decided to up the stakes and fake an accident.’