A Nutty Nutcracker Christmas

BOOK: A Nutty Nutcracker Christmas
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To Rita, Fiona, Jayme, Abby, and Dingbang…and the stinky cheese!—R. C.

For Mom and Dad—G. R. M.

For Grandmother with thanks to Andrea and Amelia

—W. S.

“YOU’RE RUINING CHRISTMAS! THE ONLY THING YOU’RE GOOD AT IS BEING BAD!”

“THAT’S RIGHT! I’M A NATURAL!”

’TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS, and everyone at the Stahlbaum house was merry…until Fritz Stahlbaum got himself in VERY BIG TROUBLE.

You see, he broke his sister Clara’s favorite nutcracker doll.

So Fritz was grounded. And accused of terrible things.

But the worst part of all, the most tragic, the most unfair and unreasonable part, was that Fritz’s favorite video game, Mouse Hunter 5000, was taken away and locked in the toy closet!

“SHE’S ABOUT YOUR AGE...”

And then everyone left to see the Nutcracker ballet, and Fritz had to stay home with the neighbor, boring old Mr. Drosselmeier, who INSISTED on telling him the story of the Nutcracker, even though Fritz was not interested AT ALL.

Then Mr. Drosselmeier talked on and on about his niece, Marie, who was arriving in an hour with her family, to visit for Christmas. Fritz did NOT care about that!

All Fritz really cared about was the loss of Mouse Hunter 5000. After all, he was THIS CLOSE to reaching Level 22, where he would finally have a chance to conquer the Mouse King.

Fortunately, Fritz knew where the key to the toy closet was hidden. So, when Mr. Drosselmeier went into the kitchen to make a phone call, Fritz snuck his video game out of the closet and played.

And
PLAYED.

And
PLAYED some more.

Over the giant wheel of cheese he went, down through the secret tunnel, up past the peppermint trees, and before Fritz knew it—HIGH SCORE! He had made it to LEVEL 22! Fritz was pretty sure he was the first kid in history ever to get there!

He began doing his victory dance around the living room when suddenly…

…he noticed a strange glow coming from inside the toy closet! Fritz could hardly believe his eyes.

The closet began to rattle and rumble. The door flew open with a BANG and out came none other than…

“We meet at last,” said the Mouse King, sneering at Fritz and raising his sword. “You’ve trapped a lot of mice in that nasty video game of yours, but now payback is mine!”

Fritz ducked and dodged, sure he was a goner, when suddenly someone else came bursting out of the closet…

“IF IT ISN’T MY FAVORITE NUTCRACKER!”

“YOU WON’T GET AWAY THIS TIME, CHEESE BREATH!”

“DUDE! YOU’RE A GIRL!”

“DUDE! YOU’RE QUICK...”

…a real live NUTCRACKER!

The Nutcracker gave a CHOP!

A SMACK!

And a KICK!

And then the Nutcracker’s hat came off, and Fritz saw something he didn’t expect…

And just then, the Mouse King slipped back inside the toy closet and was gone.

“Hurry!” said the Nutcracker to Fritz, “we’ve got to catch the Mouse King before he ruins Christmas!”

An adventure! Fritz liked the sound of that. So he followed the Nutcracker into the toy closet, wondering where in the world it would lead.

As they passed through the closet, Fritz saw a small boat waiting for them at the edge of an ocean.

“Get in!” said the Nutcracker. “Hurry!”

So Fritz climbed aboard. As they sailed, the Nutcracker told Fritz all about her battles with the Mouse King.

“He hates Christmas, because he hates it whenever children are happy,” the Nutcracker explained.

“It was me who locked him inside that video game of yours…”

“How?” Fritz interrupted.

“Too much to explain now!” the Nutcracker said. “We’re here!”

Fritz looked up to see the shore of a strange and wonderful land.

“Welcome to Christmas Wood!” announced the Nutcracker with a grin. “Everything here is made of candy. You can even eat the trees!”

Fritz snapped off a nearby twig—it tasted like real peppermint!

They sailed along the winding canal through a forest of peppermint trees. There was still no sign of the Mouse King, but Fritz noticed a sea of twinkling lights in the distance.

“That’s Toy Town!” smiled the Nutcracker. “It’s where Santa’s most magical toys come from. We have to get there before it’s too late!”

“WELCOME TO CHRISTMAS WOOD!”

“SHUT THE GATES FAST!”

“THE MOUSE KING IS ON THE LOOSE AGAIN, AND HE’S COMING THIS WAY!”

They arrived at the entrance to Toy Town and were greeted by the Mayor of Christmas Wood himself.

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