A Nashville Collection (62 page)
“A few?” Scott murmurs.
I shoot him a glance.
Quiet.
“Forgive me, Jen.”
“O-of course. Please, I understand. Given your position, I would've done the same thing.” Her laugh is sweet.
The weight of deception is eased by her forgiveness. “Just so you know, I was traveling a lot this springâon tour. And I do have a business, AubJay, Inc., where I sellâ”
“Aubrey Bags,” Jen says. “Mom, the one I showed you on the Web site for my birthday.”
“Oh, right. Those beautiful handbags.”
“Jen, I'll give you as many as you want. You can take some to your friends.”
“Really?” Her eyes pop wide.
“Absolutely, and I have a bunch of FRESH! merchandise, too, and, oh, âBorrowed Time' T-shirts. Didn't those turn out cool?”
“Yeah, the ones with the image of a take-no-guff country girl stealing the watch from her boyfriend's wrist?”
Laughing, I give her thumbs-up. “You got it.”
“Aubrey, you don't have to give me things,” Jen says, with a voice I recognize from her e-mail.
“I know. But I want to, Jen.” I pause. “I'm glad you know. I hope we can keep our friendship.”
Jen shakes her head. “You'll always be Myra Ray, my big sister.”
My eyes water. “You'll always be Jen Sinclair, my little sister.”
“She kept me close and warm on the coldest night of my life.”
âJennifer Sinclair,
Inside NashVegas interview
Scott
“Thanks for doing this, you two.”
Aubrey and Jen sit with their elbows linked on Aubrey's couch, waiting for Rafe to fire up the camera.
“I can't believe I'm doing an interview with Aubrey James. I mean, last week I didn't even know you.”
Aubrey smiles, her countenance peaceful and happy. “Jen, you probably know me better than anyone.”
“Except me.” I couldn't resist.
“Except you, Scott.” Her tone is light, yet mildly sarcastic.
“Let's do it,” Rafe says.
“Oh, I'm nervous.” Jen shivers, looking up at her mom, who's standing behind the couch.
Mrs. Sinclair taps her daughter's shoulders. “You'll be fine, baby.”
“Just remember, we're not live, so we can always stop, go back, do it again.” Aubrey's instructions are gentle and big-sister like.
Scott: Aubrey, you have a double life. Tell us about it.
AJ: What? I don't have a double life. I had a secret. A foster sister I wrote to using a different name.
Scott: Why the different name?
AJ: After my parents died, I was put in foster care for six months until Connie Godwin became my guardian.When I was taken to my foster home, I changed my name to Myra Ray. And I liked it.
Scott: Didn't your friends at school know you as Aubrey James?
AJ: Yeah, it was weird. But my foster mom acted like it was no big deal. I'm sure I wasn't the first foster kid to change her name. So, yes, I had two identities for a while. I was trying to hide, yet trying to discover who I was in my postparent world. I hated being identified as an orphaned girl. The cool basketball player was Aubrey James. The orphan was Myra Ray, and not real, if that makes sense.
Scott: Next to Aubrey is her longtime friend, Jennifer Sinclair. You've been exchanging
letters and e-mails for many years. Right?
Jen: Yes, about ten years now, I guess. But I met Aubrey fourteen years ago. I lived with the same foster family. I was six, she was sixteen.
Scott: Your mother had also been killed.
Jen: She was murdered by her boyfriend. And I never knew my father.
Scott: Murdered. Quite a journey for a six-year-old. Seems a sad set of events
brought you two together.
AJ: Very sad. But I'm realizing more every day, God does work all things together for good.
Scott: Jen, do you remember meeting Aubrey the first night?
Jen: I'll never forget. She became my lifeline. I crawled into bed with her because I couldn't sleep. I was frightened and alone, not really sure what was going on. [looking over at Aubrey] She made me feel safe. I thought Mrs. Fetterman, our foster mom, was the meanest lady alive, and I wanted to cling to the pretty girl who'd lost her momma too.
AJ: Jen broke my heart that first night. She came in clutching a baby doll, her face literally lost behind these round, sad eyes. She sat on the edge of the sofa with her toes pressed to the floor so she wouldn't slip off. She didn't say a word, but enormous tears ran down her cheeks.
Jen: My whole life I'd been told to never go into a stranger's house or talk to strangers. Now strange people were leaving me in a strange house, telling me how much fun I'd have and how a nice family wanted to help me.
AJ: Oh my gosh, my heart is breaking all over again. Jen started crying, and no one could console her. Mrs. Fetterman was frantic. It tore all of us up. Finally, Jen wore herself out, and Mrs. Fetterman put her to bed.
Jen: I didn't wear myself out. You rocked me to sleep in that big wooden rocker and sang “Jesus Loves Me” a thousand times.
AJ: Yes, I'd forgotten. [eyeing Jen] How could I forget? Later that night, I woke up with a warm little body snuggling next to me, her fingers wrapped in my hair, her dolly's fingers gouging my back.
Jen: I thought you smelled like flowers.
Scott: Jen, you were eventually adopted by a family member.
Jen: My mom's sister and her husband. A year later my uncle got a good job in Oklahoma, so we moved.
Scott: Aubrey and Jen haven't seen each other in . . .
AJ: Thirteen years. But we've been writing for ten years.
Jen: [laughing] But I thought I was writing to Myra Ray.
Scott: Why didn't you tell her, Aubrey?
AJ: When I signed with Mountain Music, Connie took me aside and said, “You need to use your real name. Time to grow up.” She was right. Within a year, my career took off and everyone knew my name. Meanwhile, Jen was still young, and we hadn't started regular correspondence. By the time she was a teenager, I was a
name
[rolling her eyes], and being anonymous with Jen felt freeing. So, right or wrong, I decided to hide my identity from her.
Jen: I like to think your fame wouldn't have changed our relationship, but I was young and immature, and finding out my
sister
was a superstar would've impacted me negatively, I think. At least for a while.
Scott: How so?
Jen: [taking a deep breath] I went through a rebellious stage around sixteen, and I know for certain I would've tried to use Aubrey as a way to buck my parents. She would've been caught in the middle. The more I think about it, the more I'm glad I didn't know.
Scott: Okay, the cat is out of the bag. The secret is known. How does it change your
relationship?
AJ: On my end, I'm relieved. Jen and I have always talked openly and honestly in our letters except when it came to my career and, of course, actually visiting each other. Now the barriers are gone.
Jen: Well, it helps to know a world-famous person is reading my personal letters. I mean, gee whiz. [laughing] But it really doesn't change anything for me other than I can't go around telling everyone I'm best buds with Aubrey James. [looking at Aubrey] Can I?
AJ: [wrinkling her nose] I prefer not.
Jen: See, no fun for me. [smiling] Really, I don't see anything changing. Maybe get a few passes backstage to her concerts, but that's it. I promise. Everything else stays the same.
Mrs. Sinclair: Except for all the free stuff she's giving you.
Jen: Mom, shhh.
AJ: Actually, this is another really great aspect of the truth. Now I can do more for Jen and her family. I didn't before because I wasn't sure how much my alter ego should flash her cash.
But this will make it easier for me to call up and say, “I'm taking a week in the summer to go to the Mediterranean. Want to come?”
Jen: Yes! Double yes.
Mrs. Sinclair: Jen, you can't take advantage of Aubrey.
Scott: Something tells me Aubrey wouldn't mind a little sister abuse.
AJ: [laughing] Probably not. Besides, this is going to be a nationally televised interview. Jen, I guess all your friends are going to find out anyway.
Jen: Can I say something? Despite everything, the Myra Ray aka Aubrey James I know is an amazing, kind woman who wrapped her heart around a frightened little girl and kept her warm and safe. To me, she'll always be my hero.
Scott: Well said, Jen. Thank you.
The interview segment with Jen ends. She rises from the couch, smiling, hugging her mom. I tap Aubrey on the knee. “You're not done yet.”
“Okay, whatever.” Aubrey peers around at Jen. “She's fab, isn't she?” “Like her big sister,” I say.
Scott: Ready for some rapid-fire questions?
AJ: Sure, whatever that means.
Scott: Dogs or cats.
AJ: [gesturing toward her pets] Dogs, but I do love cats.
Scott: Summer or winter?
AJ: Fall.
Scott: Okay, not the question, but whatever. Chocolate or vanilla?
AJ: Are you crazy? Definitely chocolate.
Scott: Leno or Letterman?
AJ: Oooh, not fair. I do closing song sets on Letterman a lot, so I'll say Letterman.
Scott: Reading or television?
AJ: What is this, “Beat up Aubrey with hard questions”? Um, reading. But I do love old movies.
Scott: Favorite movie?
AJ:
Notting Hill
,
The Way We Were
,
Never Been Kissed
, and the indie film
Love Like a Rock
, which used my song, “Always.”
Scott: Favorite kind of day?
AJ: Oh, this I can answer. Fall day. Slightly overcast with the sun filtering through cumulus clouds. A crisp breeze. Walking through fallen leaves with my friends, picturing the bowl of chili that is waiting for me at home.
Scott: Greatest musical influence?
AJ: My parents, of course. And my producer, Dave Whitestone. But I'd have to say I really admire Amy Grant. She took some hits for her divorce, but she never lost her faith, unlike some people [pointing to herself] She is an amazing songwriter and performer. I'd love to write and record with her one day.
Scott: Finish this sentence: “If I could meet anyone, it would be . . .”
AJ: Dead or alive?
Scott: “If I could meet anyone, it would be . . .”
AJ: Okay, okay. Anyone. Cleopatra, or the Queen of Sheba.
Scott: [grinning] That's two someones, but I'll let you slide. Why Cleo and Sheba?
AJ: Cleopatra because she sent herself, at twenty-two, to Julius Caesar wrapped in an oriental rug. Sheba, because she exchanged ideas with King Solomon and fell in love.
Scott: Then why not meet Solomon?
AJ: I'd rather talk to someone who talked to him. Think about it.
Six thousand years ago, or however many years, a woman sat down and exchanged intellectual property with the wisest man whoever lived. Pretty amazing.
Scott: Feminism wasn't born yesterday, was it?
AJ: No.
Scott: Wendy's or McDonald's?
AJ: Can we go back to Solomon and Sheba?
Scott: No. Answer the question.
AJ: Burger King, my final answer.
Scott: What's on your iPod?
AJ: Songs.
Scott: Smart aleck. Whose songs? What kind of songs?
AJ: Lots of songs. I love to listen to all kinds of music. I recently downloaded Bread's greatest hits, and Journey's. My dad loved their sound. I'm digging Miranda Lambert and Carrie Underwood. They're two amazing, beautiful artists with a totally different feel and message.
Let's see. Kim Hill and Rita Springer. Glen Campbell. What else? Martina's
Timeless
CD. I'm jealous she did a concept album like that before me. Maybe she won't mind if I cover “Rose Garden” again.
Scott: No show tunes?
AJ: [laughing] No, not yet.
Scott: Final question.
AJ: Promise?
Scott: Do you want to go on a date with Scott Vaughn?
AJ: [hesitating] Someday, maybe, yeah, I might.
“Aubrey James returns to her roots Monday night, August 6, as she joins the Ralph Lester Going Home Gospel Tour. This will be the country legend's first gospel performance since her parents' untimely death in '93.”
âBrad Schmitt, Brad on 2
Aubrey
August 6, Ryman Auditorium
Scott and Rafe wait for me in the back of the auditorium. Our final
interview. As I approach, Scott smiles at me. “Are you going to miss me?”
I snap my fingers. “How'd you know?”
He laughs as I slide in to the pew next to him, then asks, “What's wrong?”
He knows me too well.
“I'm nervous.”
“More than usual?”
I nod. “It's been a while since I sang gospel.”
He takes my hand in his. “You don't see yourself as the rest of us do. And I'm pretty sure you don't see yourself as God does.”
“Does anybody?”
He grins. “No, but especially you. Look, forget about labelsâ gospel, country, rock, whatever. Get up there and believe God will meet you.”
I squeeze his hand. “I'm glad we did this
interview
thing. You've . . .” I pick an imaginary piece of lint from my black skirt. “You've helped me realize a lot of things about myself, good and bad.” I look into his eyes. “I can't imagine not knowing you.”
He coughs, covering his mouth with his fist. “See, I told you. You're going to miss me.”
Scott
This is nuts. I can't fall in love with Aubrey James. Can. Not. It's been,
what? Four weeks since our first interview segment. In which time she ended a relationship and engagement.