A Matter of Destiny (17 page)

"So do I," Joe said. "Let me know what happens." He stopped as if to say goodbye, gripping her fingers even tighter.

"Where are you going?" Sharon felt suddenly bereft.

He stared down at her with a tender expression that stirred her insides. "I need to finish a report for the vice principal. It has to be ready Monday morning. Can you find your way back all right?"

His dark eyes gleamed with an emotion she didn't understand. What did he really feel for her?

She tried to look pained, but laughed instead. "I guess so. Good luck with your paperwork, and thanks again for last night." It seemed as if she were always thanking him for something.

"As I said before, anytime."

His gaze slid from her eyes to her mouth, then on down as if he couldn't help himself. Sharon's heartbeat accelerated, and her breathing grew shallow as she waited.

Joe's throat felt like the air supply had closed off when she looked up at him. A faint breeze stirred her auburn hair, making it come even more vibrantly alive.

He leaned toward her and rubbed his lips lightly back and forth over hers, creating a rolling sensation in the pit of his stomach.

His body went hot, and he shivered with a desire that would not be quenched. This was one dangerous lady, and he'd promised himself to take it easy, not plunge headlong into disaster.

With a deep sigh, he decided, once again, to let her go for now. "Goodbye, pretty lady." He didn't know how to say goodbye forever.

Joe turned and began an easy jog down the road toward his apartment. Sharon watched until he was out of sigh, then headed slowly for her place. Saying goodbye to Joe was becoming more and more difficult, and soon, it would be for good.

What was she going to do about it? That question inspired answers that scared her sense of security and propriety. Could she be braver than she'd ever been before?

When she got home, the house was empty. She paced the floor, wondering what to do. Should she call Joe? No, he'd been bothered enough, and besides, he had work to do.

She phoned the Banner house, but no one answered. When would the kids be back? She ended up scrubbing the kitchen sink for lack of something better to do, although she'd already cleaned it that morning.

When the phone rang, Sharon nearly jumped out of her shoes.

"Sharon, it's Paula. We're here at the church. Can you believe it? Ty agreed to talk to Father Simmons at least once. I told him I wouldn't go home unless he did."

Sharon caught the joy in Paula's voice. "That's wonderful, Paula. I'm glad." She had an idea. "Listen, why don't I keep the kids here tonight? You can pick them up tomorrow. That way, you and Ty will have some time alone."

"You really wouldn't mind?" Paula asked, her voice incredulous, but hopeful.

"No, it'll be fine. The teenagers will help. Have a good evening, and I'll see you tomorrow."

When they'd hung up, Sharon turned away from the phone and felt a deep sense of loneliness settle over her.

What kind of friend was she, Sharon thought. She should be happy for Paula, and she was, she insisted inwardly. She had to pull herself out of this mood. The kids would be here soon, and there'd be a houseful to handle.

The phone rang again, and this time it was Joe. "Just wanted to make sure you got home safely," he explained, his husky voice sending shivers down her spine.

Sharon's spirits soared. "Yes, I did, but with no help from you."

"Ouch," he said. "I can see you're as prickly as ever." Before she could retort, he added, "How did things go with the Banners?"

"Fine, so far. Paula just called, and they're with Father Simmons at the church. They're leaving the kids here tonight."

"Hmmm, sounds like you'll be swamped. Need help?"

As much as she was tempted, Sharon refused. "Thanks anyway, Joe, but you'd better stick to your paperwork. We must keep Mr. Basil happy, mustn't we?"

Why was she being self-sacrificing and throwing away the chance to be with him?

"All right, but call if you need me."

She couldn't depend on him for everything, but he
had
made her feel better. With a sudden burst of energy, she decided to make a casserole for the bunch that would be arriving any minute. Things didn't look so bleak after all.

By three o'clock the next afternoon, Sharon was exhausted. Even with the teenagers' help, the two younger children had needed constant supervision or entertainment.

How did Paula do it? It's been a long time, she thought, running her fingers through her hair.

David, Luke, and Melanie had grown tired of corralling the youngsters and gone bowling. Stephanie and Jason were playing with Caddy in the front yard. The rapidly growing St. Bernard loved all children and was always ready for a romp; that is, unless a nap sounded more inviting.

A rapping sound at the door startled Sharon, and she sat up, realizing she'd dozed off in the chair. What were the children doing? She hurried to the door and found Joe standing outside.

"Hi."

Sharon's heart flip-flopped at the sight and sound of him. His eyes shone with an emotion she didn't dare interpret. "Hi, yourself. What brings you here?" She suddenly didn't feel so tired.

"I was just about done with my report and decided to take a break." He motioned toward the kids and overgrown puppy in the yard and asked, "Getting to you yet?"

Sharon nodded, then felt ashamed. "It's not the kids' fault. They've been great. I'm just feeling my age, I guess."

"Well, it's Reardon to the rescue. You go back to what you were doing, and I'll watch the little hoodlums."

She laughed. "You mean little darlings, don't you?"

"Oops, slip of the tongue." He turned and whistled to Jason to throw him the ball.

Soon, the four of them, including Caddy, were engrossed in a new game of ball tag.

Sharon watched from the porch swing instead of going inside. She loved the music of Joe's deep laugh as he played with the children. She couldn't imagine how it would be when he left Hollow Bend. He'd made it possible for her to find her own strengths and to feel joy in the little moments.

Every once in awhile, Joe would look over to see if she was watching. His grin was wide, like a small boy seeking approval. She gave it to him with her smile.

About half an hour later, Ty and Paula pulled up. Paula was cuddled up to Ty so that it looked as if only one person sat in the cab.

Sharon breathed a sigh of relief and went out to greet them. Joe reached the truck first.

The Banners acted as shy as honeymooners the way their glances kept meeting, with a sense of wonder in their eyes. Sharon felt a twinge of envy, hoping that someday she could once again feel complete happiness for those who were in love.

Joe and Ty shook hands, as Ty flushed a deep red. "Thanks, Joe, for the other night. Sorry for the trouble I caused."

Joe tried to put him at ease. "I'm glad it worked out." He cast a glance at Sharon and she smiled, silently echoing those sentiments.

Stephanie and Jason interrupted their game for a moment to holler to their parents. "Hi Mom, hi Dad."

Caddy had since worn out and gone to sleep on the porch. Some watch dog, Sharon thought wryly.

"We just came by to pick up the kids," Ty said.

Paula added, "Thanks for keeping them." Her eyes held the unspoken message that she'd tell Sharon all about it later. The two women had always been able to read one another's minds.

Ty included his thanks and called to the children. "Time to go, kids. Get in the truck." With grumbles and protests, the youngsters scrambled into the cab.

Sharon told Paula that David would bring Melanie home after bowling.

As they drove out of sight, she sighed deeply once more. "Whew. I never thought things would turn out so well." Turning to Joe, she said, "You deserve another dinner. Want to stay?"

"Yes, ma'am, but no cooking for you. I'll run into town and order some dinner from the Chicken Coop. You soak in the tub or take a nap or whatever. I'll be back before you know it."

Sharon stood, speechless, as he slid into his car and left. What a nice feeling to have someone look after her. Not that Tom hadn't; they were just two different kinds of men.

A sliver of disloyalty sliced through her, but she didn't let it take hold.

She did as Joe suggested and ran the water in her old clawfoot tub. She'd wear her blue wool; loving the soft fabric against her skin. Tom had liked it, too. It felt strange to be dressing up for someone else, but, she insisted, she was doing it mostly for herself.

While she was soaking, she heard the front door slam, signaling David and Luke's return.

"Mom, we're home," shouted the rambunctious Luke.

"I'm in the tub," she called back. "Be out in a minute."

"Take your time," David said.

Sharon liked it when her family gathered at the end of the day. Then she knew they were safe at home and nothing could harm them. At least that's the way it seemed to her.

It wasn't long before Joe returned. By then, Sharon had slipped into the blue dress and brushed her long hair, then tied it back with a matching ribbon. Instead of shoes, she wore blue satin slippers. After all, they were just relaxing at home.

When she came downstairs, Joe was momentarily stunned, as he always was by her beauty. He admired the way she took one day at a time in her struggle for survival. He'd often tried to imagine all she was going through.

Had she guessed how he felt about her? Probably not, but he realized he wanted her to look at him the same way she must have looked at her husband, her green eyes glowing with love.

A twinge of jealousy made him turn away and put the food on the table. Not the proper emotion for an angel. He'd been fantasizing too much about possibilities lately instead of dealing with reality.

He halted his thoughts and tried to concentrate on the task at hand. "Everybody hungry?" he asked with a grin.

An affirmative chorus was his answer, and he breathed a sign of relief.

They all enjoyed the dinner Joe had provided, especially Caddy who wasn't particular about who fed him. If he got any bigger, he wouldn't fit under the table.

Joe noticed that David was unusually quiet. He thought the boy had been coming out of his shell lately, but it was obvious something was still bothering him.

No matter how hard Joe tried, he couldn't seem to win David's trust. The bond he had with Luke had been earned through constant exposure in the classroom and in sports, but he'd had no such opportunity with David.

Joe tried to guess what Sharon's older boy was thinking. There had to be a way to get through to him. With a start, he wondered why it should be so important when he was leaving in June. Maybe because his mission felt unfinished.

Sharon laughed at something Luke had said and Joe looked across at her. She was lovely, in the soft lamplight, with her thick auburn hair and flashing green eyes.

Perhaps at first it was her tragic air that had stirred the protective impulses he had toward her, but now, it was much more than that.

Joe had trouble swallowing the bite he'd taken as he admitted the love he felt was the forever kind, sacred and lasting. He was never going to get over it, not for all of eternity.

He'd thought that maybe it was common for guardians to feel so protective about their charges, but this was different. Painfully, he gulped, then washed the food down. What in the world was he going to do about it?

"More chicken?" Sharon asked, handing him the bucket.

He shook his head, but couldn't speak, so overwhelmed was he by the emotion he'd just acknowledged. A sense of panic flooded his being.